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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Acme 13 Sep 08 - 10:34 PM
Amos 13 Sep 08 - 09:13 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 13 Sep 08 - 09:00 PM
Rapparee 13 Sep 08 - 05:48 PM
Amos 13 Sep 08 - 05:13 PM
Amos 13 Sep 08 - 04:58 PM
Rapparee 13 Sep 08 - 04:51 PM
Acme 13 Sep 08 - 10:34 AM
Rapparee 13 Sep 08 - 10:29 AM
Amos 13 Sep 08 - 01:49 AM
Rapparee 12 Sep 08 - 10:06 PM
Amos 12 Sep 08 - 06:11 PM
Donuel 12 Sep 08 - 04:48 PM
Rapparee 12 Sep 08 - 04:19 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 12 Sep 08 - 04:10 PM
Rapparee 12 Sep 08 - 02:38 PM
Amos 12 Sep 08 - 02:16 PM
Rapparee 12 Sep 08 - 01:38 PM
Acme 12 Sep 08 - 12:35 PM
MMario 12 Sep 08 - 11:07 AM
Amos 12 Sep 08 - 10:52 AM
Rapparee 11 Sep 08 - 09:44 PM
Amos 11 Sep 08 - 07:48 PM
Acme 11 Sep 08 - 07:06 PM
Rapparee 11 Sep 08 - 06:21 PM
Amos 11 Sep 08 - 05:45 PM
Rapparee 11 Sep 08 - 05:43 PM
Amos 11 Sep 08 - 05:30 PM
Rapparee 11 Sep 08 - 04:31 PM
MMario 11 Sep 08 - 03:52 PM
MMario 11 Sep 08 - 03:51 PM
Amos 11 Sep 08 - 03:43 PM
Amos 11 Sep 08 - 03:30 PM
Rapparee 11 Sep 08 - 02:34 PM
Amos 11 Sep 08 - 12:36 PM
MMario 11 Sep 08 - 11:45 AM
Amos 11 Sep 08 - 10:40 AM
Rapparee 11 Sep 08 - 09:14 AM
Amos 10 Sep 08 - 11:55 PM
Rapparee 10 Sep 08 - 10:40 PM
Acme 10 Sep 08 - 08:03 PM
Rapparee 10 Sep 08 - 06:33 PM
Amos 10 Sep 08 - 06:31 PM
Rapparee 10 Sep 08 - 04:13 PM
Amos 10 Sep 08 - 12:35 PM
Rapparee 10 Sep 08 - 12:17 PM
Amos 10 Sep 08 - 10:58 AM
Amos 10 Sep 08 - 10:13 AM
Rapparee 10 Sep 08 - 10:05 AM
Amos 10 Sep 08 - 12:35 AM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 13 Sep 08 - 10:34 PM

I wish I had a saw like that. I can do the knife and hot butter bit, but a saw sharply through hard wood, that would be very nice!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Sep 08 - 09:13 PM

Oh, the saw was pretty much preassembled, but this is not the type of saw you play in your band, Rapaire, with the flat bendy blade just right from humming along with "Git along home, Cindy, Cindy" or "Bile Dem Cabbage Down".   This is a six-foot tall powered bandsaw with a cast-iron table, tilting trunnions, adjustable rip guide, oversized emergency STOP button, and a big motor. When you start it up the big upper and lower drive-belt wheels start turning and it hums like a UFO warming up for takeoff.

Vrooom. And it slices through pine like a hot knife through warm butter.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 13 Sep 08 - 09:00 PM

I wish a had a band-saw! I frequently hear bands I'd like to take a saw to.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Sep 08 - 05:48 PM

I got my saw pre-assembled, Amos. I mean, a blade, a handle, three bolts and nuts -- how much easier could you get? I even have one where the tang of the blade is just stuck into the handle. They even came with a blade guard.

I think you're just making it sound harder than it is.

Look. Lay the blade on a table or something. Slide the handle onto it, lining up the holes the handle with the holes in the blade. Now put the bolts, washers and nuts on and tighten them.

Voila! Your saw's all set to use. (Remember to saw with the pointy part of the blade, not the smooth part.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Sep 08 - 05:13 PM

Mom:

I have been bending and twisting and lifting and scrabbling for nuts and washers all day, assembling my new band-saw!! It is really a thing of great beauty. But every single nut and lockwasher and t-handle needs to be found and placed and each one requires its own combination of reaching, bending, twisting, spindling, mutilating and folding to get it into place. Plus the instructions were written by Chongo on a bad night. So it s a painfully slow process and I feel like I just got out of Abu Ghraib.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Sep 08 - 04:58 PM

ANd what's wrong with that, I'd like to know?
You was up in da belfry, eating Lime JellO!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Sep 08 - 04:51 PM

Where was Mom when the lights went out?
Down in the basement eating sauerkraut.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 13 Sep 08 - 10:34 AM

You're scaring MOM. She doesn't want her kids cracked.

It's starting to rain. She can sit out on the covered porch for a while longer, it's a gentle drizzle. But the wind is coming. Someone move good chair over by the window so she can read if the lights go out.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Sep 08 - 10:29 AM

Some of us were completely cracked long before THAT, Amos.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Sep 08 - 01:49 AM

Some of us here are completely cracked, all because we stay on the Net.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Sep 08 - 10:06 PM

Get a good firewall, too.

And remember -- they can't crack it if it's unplugged from the 'Net.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Sep 08 - 06:11 PM

Jeeze, Donuel, back up your files to a separate hard-disk, back that hard disk up to a DVD, and post your work on a large independent site like flikr.

If necessary get an anonymizer service to cloak the point of origin.

Another possible stunt is to use a separate computer to do only your uploads when ready, and turn it off when not in use, and.or only use it from random public access sites like Starbucks.

No IP trace, no hackery.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 12 Sep 08 - 04:48 PM

Yes I have noticed that the far right are mostly absent on MOM

So I will let you in on what I only disclosed in a PM.

Similar to the last Presidential election when my computer and website were attacked and files erased, it has happened again.

This time my Photoshop software was disabled and my computer was capable of only one black screen message...
Unable to find drive C


All my opinions and pictures have been posted soley and exclusively on the BS section of mudcat.org

All I am saying is that someone or some group is playing dirty to the point of criminality.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Sep 08 - 04:19 PM

I had to go to school to get an M.S. degree.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 12 Sep 08 - 04:10 PM

Hi Mom!

I just saw a Google ad for "Online B.S. Degrees". Why would anyone want to pay money to have a degree in B.S.?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Sep 08 - 02:38 PM

Just you wait, Amos, just you wait.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Sep 08 - 02:16 PM

Noted? NOTED??? Sir, you do him a great disservice with such faint praise. He is not only noted, he is wide and famous in his own mind!!!

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Sep 08 - 01:38 PM

Since a noted political pundit* has said, quite truthfully, "ALL politics is BS, but not all BS is politics" it could be difficult to enforce.
















*Hint: He's the Director the of public library in Pocatello, Idaho.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 12 Sep 08 - 12:35 PM

What would you say?

Hey, I had an idea this morning. We'd better be careful that Sarah P. doesn't cotton to MOM and the MOAB. If she read it from end to end she'd be SO WELL equipped to be VP it wouldn't be funny--except, of course, she'd also have some great funny stories to tell and some stunningly thoughtful observations of the world around us that would astonish all listeners.

So, here it is:

Mother of All BS Threads© is off limits for McCain folks' foraging and mining for details without proper citation and acknowledgement.

There. That takes care of Little Sarah with the big jaw.

SRS


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 12 Sep 08 - 11:07 AM

heh-heh-heh-heh.

she said

"hoopla"


heheheheheheheheh!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Sep 08 - 10:52 AM

THe Motto makes the same kind of sense as some of the other realities you have offered. But I guess that's the BS universe!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Sep 08 - 09:44 PM

I just got back from a Legion meeting. They are going to start a group for young people called "Sons and Daughters of The Idaho Legion Embracing Purity and Temperance" (SADOTILEPAT). The motto chosen is "Don't Walk A Mile In Our Shoes." The primary focus would seem to be softball and/or rugby and/or archery.

I'm not at all sure how this is going to go, since the sports will be played all year around and could cause serious interference with the beer swilling in the Hovel.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Sep 08 - 07:48 PM

The Forum page seems to think the number I claimed, and the one MM claimed, are spot on.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 11 Sep 08 - 07:06 PM

Why all of the hoopla two numbers off?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Sep 08 - 06:21 PM

Your sea kayak is finally "coming out", huh?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Sep 08 - 05:45 PM

Sure I do, and it's ALL good. I write my own stuff, and my birthday is tomorrow and I just got a new bandsaw from my mother-in-=law!!! Mwahahaha.

And I am taking my sea-kayak out again before dawn on Saturday.

Mwahahahaha.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Sep 08 - 05:43 PM

Ground Amos too while you're at it. If you don't know what he's done, he does.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Sep 08 - 05:30 PM

MWAha

hahaha

hahahaha

hahahaha

hahahahahahahahahaha


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Sep 08 - 04:31 PM

MOM!!!

MMario took my number!!

Ground him.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 11 Sep 08 - 03:52 PM

two
five
two
five
two


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 11 Sep 08 - 03:51 PM

which is two before the semi-spinner


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Sep 08 - 03:43 PM

25250!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Sep 08 - 03:30 PM

Ah, no. You are sadly, sadly, sadly mistaken. In fact your assertions verge on the pathetic and on the ridiculous. But I suspect you already knew that, as any good Narcissist would.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Sep 08 - 02:34 PM

Your imagination is actually a creation of my imagination.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Sep 08 - 12:36 PM

Me, too!

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 11 Sep 08 - 11:45 AM

Sometimes my imaginations staggers me....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Sep 08 - 10:40 AM

1. Thou shalt not.

Shall, too, so there.

2. Thou shalt.

Won't.

3. Thou shalt try to reconcile the differences between 1 and 2, above.

No problem.

4. Thou shalt fail in 3, above.

Too late, Big Guy. Got it taped.

5. Thou shalt feel guilty as hell about it.

Knock, knock.... .... Argo!

6. Thou shalt do penance, which shalt be sending me all thy worldly goods, which I own anyway.

...Argo who????

7. Thou shalt still feel guilty about it.

...Argo Phuqueyerself.

8. Thou shalt raise thy voice and rail against me, thy Creator.

DOne.

9. Thou shalt feel guilty about 9, above, also.

Ixnay on the ilt-guay, Eator-cray.

10. Thou shalt be smitten and go to thy Judgement feeling guilty as all hell about failing in 3, above.

Ain't a-gonna happen, Big Guy. You are too far out in left field to even see the plate.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Sep 08 - 09:14 AM

Oh, I already know what you're going to decide. I merely want to give you the illusion of choice and free will so that you'll feel even more guilty when you think you have broken one of my commandments:

1. Thou shalt not.
2. Thou shalt.
3. Thou shalt try to reconcile the differences between 1 and 2, above.
4. Thou shalt fail in 3, above.
5. Thou shalt feel guilty as hell about it.
6. Thou shalt do penance, which shalt be sending me all thy worldly goods, which I own anyway.
7. Thou shalt still feel guilty about it.
8. Thou shalt raise thy voice and rail against me, thy Creator.
9. Thou shalt feel guilty about 9, above, also.
10. Thou shalt be smitten and go to thy Judgement feeling guilty as all hell about failing in 3, above.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Sep 08 - 11:55 PM

"You decide"....????

OK...who are you and what have you done with Rapaire?

No solipsist would ever say "You decide", even a weisenheimer one like Rapaire.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Sep 08 - 10:40 PM

Well, we might have been on the Oregon Coast, moving slowly south from Astoria to Depoe Bay before heading back.

Or then again maybe I really was kidnapped by the Bavarian Illiterati.

You decide.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 10 Sep 08 - 08:03 PM

So where were you really, Rapaire? Did you get stuck in the bathroom down at the Legion Hovel and just don't want to admit that it took three days for the drunks to find you because they usually walk out the front door and pee around the corner in the alley?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Sep 08 - 06:33 PM

I'm sorry, but I'm still recovering from my abduction by the Bavarian Illiterati.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Sep 08 - 06:31 PM

I am sorry to see that your literacy is also suffering, but you can still have a nice retirement, if you don't do anything too challenging or anything that requires memory.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Sep 08 - 04:13 PM

"Bare", not "bear". Theatre has progressed since Shakespeare's day, Amos.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Sep 08 - 12:35 PM

...stage left, pursued by a bear.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Sep 08 - 12:17 PM

As it is written at the end of "Macbeth", "Hamlet", and other such plays, Exeunt omnes.

That's Latin for "We all gotta go sometime."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Sep 08 - 10:58 AM

Go to!!

No, I shall not go to. YOU go to!

No, YOU go to.

No, go to yourself!!

No way--you go to!!

Ain't a gonna. Go to you!

No, go to YOU!

No, YOU!!!

I'm tellllling.

Brat.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Sep 08 - 10:13 AM

Well, you lifted it neatly, and then protest I failed to recognize you for it. And somehow, make me the villein? Pshaw. As for le brave de Bergerac, tu te trompes encore. Je peux le lire facilement, mais ca n'est pas le meme chose que comprendre lui qui l'a mis la-haut.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Sep 08 - 10:05 AM

What, sirrah?! You cannot read la belle langue as she is writ and must instead engage is crude insults? Go to, go to! You are a villein!

Not to recognize at first glance the opening sequence of Alexander Pope's Dunciad is all but unforgivable in someone of your claimed intelligence and literacy! I credited Rostand and assumed, wrongly, that you would recognize the immortal words of Pope.

подленький сноб!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Sep 08 - 12:35 AM

Wait. I defend Cyrano against your heartless borrowings of his name, and you imply this brings down the curtain of final darkness on all life? And then try to thrash me with the "This is not a nose, sir" dialogue in early French? What the hell?

I erred--it is not Republicanism which keeps you in the closet, sirrah.

You are a slumgullion, a ribald patty-shank, a miscreant of dreams, a babble-fish, an untoward galoot.

Go to.


A


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