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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Acme 08 Nov 05 - 03:21 PM
MMario 08 Nov 05 - 01:32 PM
catspaw49 08 Nov 05 - 01:29 PM
MMario 08 Nov 05 - 01:07 PM
GUEST,Ralphs 08 Nov 05 - 12:07 PM
MMario 08 Nov 05 - 10:56 AM
MMario 08 Nov 05 - 10:54 AM
Bunnahabhain 08 Nov 05 - 10:26 AM
MMario 08 Nov 05 - 10:19 AM
MMario 08 Nov 05 - 10:16 AM
Acme 08 Nov 05 - 10:12 AM
MMario 08 Nov 05 - 10:05 AM
Amos 08 Nov 05 - 09:36 AM
MMario 08 Nov 05 - 08:38 AM
Amos 07 Nov 05 - 10:47 PM
Acme 07 Nov 05 - 09:55 PM
Acme 07 Nov 05 - 09:46 PM
Bunnahabhain 07 Nov 05 - 08:59 PM
Bunnahabhain 07 Nov 05 - 08:58 PM
Amos 07 Nov 05 - 08:38 PM
Bunnahabhain 07 Nov 05 - 08:38 PM
Bunnahabhain 07 Nov 05 - 08:24 PM
Bunnahabhain 07 Nov 05 - 08:15 PM
Bunnahabhain 07 Nov 05 - 08:11 PM
Amos 07 Nov 05 - 08:10 PM
Bunnahabhain 07 Nov 05 - 07:44 PM
GUEST,Rapaire 07 Nov 05 - 07:21 PM
Acme 07 Nov 05 - 06:41 PM
Bunnahabhain 07 Nov 05 - 04:03 PM
Acme 07 Nov 05 - 03:55 PM
MMario 07 Nov 05 - 03:16 PM
Amos 07 Nov 05 - 03:08 PM
MMario 07 Nov 05 - 02:50 PM
Acme 07 Nov 05 - 02:47 PM
MMario 07 Nov 05 - 02:27 PM
Acme 07 Nov 05 - 01:32 PM
MMario 07 Nov 05 - 01:28 PM
GUEST,Ralphs 07 Nov 05 - 01:23 PM
MMario 07 Nov 05 - 01:22 PM
MMario 07 Nov 05 - 01:11 PM
MMario 07 Nov 05 - 01:10 PM
MMario 07 Nov 05 - 01:09 PM
MMario 07 Nov 05 - 12:59 PM
Bunnahabhain 07 Nov 05 - 12:50 PM
Acme 07 Nov 05 - 09:47 AM
Amos 07 Nov 05 - 09:46 AM
MMario 07 Nov 05 - 09:26 AM
Amos 06 Nov 05 - 10:48 PM
Acme 06 Nov 05 - 09:35 AM
Amos 06 Nov 05 - 12:46 AM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 08 Nov 05 - 03:21 PM

In honor of 'spaw's visit, a pome (and a sublime little pun).

ODE TO A ROAD APPLE
                            by Thea Gavin

                Here, without using chemicals,
                I play the hand that nature deals-
                my garden's where an earthworm feels secure.
                Sky high corn, and these tomatoes
                dwarf their tough-skinned tasteless kin, those
                pathetic mutants at the grocery store.

                If I shared my little secret
                it might spoil your will to eat, yet
                also give you food for thought if you're unsure.
                I use fertilizer so fine
                from the south end of my equine
                friends in-stalled outside the city: horse manure.

                Gardener's gold, I load and pile it
                mix it, turn it, wait and while it
                cooks I test it every smelly couple days:
                plunge my hand into the steaming
                reeking middle, what's it needing...
                air? or water? "One more week," the odor says.

                Manue compost on the side as
                a snug blanket, makes like midas:
                everything it touches turns to veggie gold.
                Green bean vines devour their trellis,
                rabid zucchini overwhelm us -
                that stuff seems to make them giddy and quite bold.

                So try this healthy spinach sample
                courtesy of horses' ample
                capacity for pelletizing hay.
                And if it messes up your thinking
                to be eating what was stinking
                manure, think how you might recycle too some day.


                                            Thea Gavin
                                            11/27/00


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 08 Nov 05 - 01:32 PM

'spaw - you do realize just who was the inspiration for this entire thread don't you?

no - it wasn't Shatner.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: catspaw49
Date: 08 Nov 05 - 01:29 PM

From it's inception until now, I would like to congratulate the cast of characters who have toiled along in total silliness to make this indeed the MOABS. Many folks have contributed but there are those few which I and others will always pay tribute to as the main provacateurs of this heap of festering drivel and nonsense which deserve credit for not only their contribution to the power of nothingness (for which I am sure they will receive The Hemingway Award) but also as the living proof and testament to the now apparent fact that one can live, breathe, and yet have no life at all.

I send along as well a 120 pound container of pressurized possum farts which Cleigh has collected to honor the occasion of this thread crossing the line into true immortality. Please release them at the height of the celebration (Keep Away from Open Flame).

Good on ya', good up ya', and good in ya' depending upon any personal philosophies.

Spaw


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 08 Nov 05 - 01:07 PM

Do Vogons vogue? Or are they vague?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Ralphs
Date: 08 Nov 05 - 12:07 PM

Har!


We have shown your poems to our friends, the Vogons, and they/she/it like them very much indeed. They are on their way to tell you themselves.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 08 Nov 05 - 10:56 AM

The ponderous beast went down
With a crack of a broken shaft.
And the night drew through the trees
In one long invidious draft.

The most unquestioning pair
That ever accepted fate
And the least disposed to ascribe
Any more than we had to hate,


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 08 Nov 05 - 10:54 AM

With a lantern that wouldn't burn
In too frail a buggy we drove
Behind too heavy a horse
Through a pitch-dark limitless grove.

And a man came out of the trees
And took our horse by the head
And reaching back to his ribs
Deliberately stabbed him dead.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 08 Nov 05 - 10:26 AM

Ahh, floor boards.

Carpet burns take some explaining,
Despite their innocent sustaining,
Every sort of imagined vice,
Cross their mind in a trice,
They don't believe you when you say,
I got this, dressed, at play.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 08 Nov 05 - 10:19 AM

and I must say I like this one (slightly edited)

Your nose hair is pleasingly twisted with the roots of a bristlecone pine that is so precariously perched on the side of a cliff it may easily uproot and fall upon the lobbyists below.

We have a bristlecone pine in the garden.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 08 Nov 05 - 10:16 AM

from the Surrealist compliment generator:

Your dashingly colored toupee twists my right boot into a state of ennui with the speed and dexterity of many lemon meringue-coated conquistadors.

Your mucuous membranes glisten with the glow of forty-seven burning violins.

Your eyebrows are as verdantly forrested as the seeded woodworms of my most sombre dreams.

You cannot compare with the apex of a ferris wheel, nor the nadir of a ditch filled with a coelocanth's droppings.

Its a far far better thing I do than to require that you find me a hammer and pummel me with all due diligence.


Seems to sum everything up, yes?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 08 Nov 05 - 10:12 AM

It's going to take us a while at this rate. But Amos, I am impressed with the result of your cheerleader musings! Someone ought to send a copy of that to the originating newspaper that carried the story!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 08 Nov 05 - 10:05 AM

'tis only forty and five which do remain
before 10 times a thousand MOAB shall claim


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 08 Nov 05 - 09:36 AM

It wasna carpet, it was flooring
Which we spent last night adoring
Complimenting each other's taste
And gazing at each board well-placed.

At last, at last, Gratis Ad Scolium
We've lost that ugly bland linoleum
Which carried joys and friends and tears
For damn well over thirty years.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 08 Nov 05 - 08:38 AM

Carpe Adhesive = Sieze the Glue!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 10:47 PM

The line is long, and pained and slow
To the little room where Ladyes go;
No reason can the patrons see
Who wait so desperately to pee.
Alas, what is that awful din?
From deep the Ladye's Room within?
What agony, and pain and fright
Must cause such groanings in the night,
Such screams of bodies clearly torn,
Or else a child is being born!
The lasses in the long line frown
And tighten their sphincters further down
As through the door, the cries and moans
Rattles them down into their bones.
At last, at last, the latch is drawn
And lightly staggering, pink as dawn,
All flushed and bright with passion's dew
A cheerleader bright -- and then there's two!
Two breathless beauties, tart and glowing
With lustful smiles of secret knowing,
Who cruelly all these damsels vexed
While they were busy, having sex.
To top it off, the Sapphic rose
Whacks some poor toper on the nose
And leaving him stunned, escapes the light,
Away in the cool, clear Lesbos night.

Ganymede Philodendron
Tales of Forgotten Thespians
Athens, 1959


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 09:55 PM

This story certainly evolved differently than I thought it would when I clicked on the headline.


Cheerleaders Had Sex in Bar, Witnesses Say
November 07, 2005
TAMPA, Fla. - Two Carolina Panthers cheerleaders were charged after their arrest at a bar where witnesses told police the women had sex in a restroom.

Renee Thomas, 20, of Pittsboro, N.C., and Angela Keathley, 26, of Belmont, N.C., were taken to Hillsborough County Jail early Sunday.

Witnesses said the women were having sex in a stall with each other, angering patrons waiting in line to get into the restroom at the club in the Channelside district.

Thomas was charged with battery Sunday after allegedly striking a bar patron when she was leaving the restroom, then landed in even more trouble after police said she gave officers a driver's license belonging to another Panthers cheerleader who was not in Tampa.

Thomas, who made the trip to Florida for Sunday's game between the Panthers and Tampa Bay Buccaneers, was released from jail on $500 bail before police learned she was not the person she claimed to be.

Providing police with a false name is a misdemeanor. However, Thomas was charged Monday with giving a false name and causing harm to another - a third-degree felony punishable by probation or a jail term of 1 to 5 years, said police spokeswoman Laura McElroy.

Meanwhile, detectives are trying to determine how Thomas gained possession of the driver's license of the third cheerleader.

Keathley, charged with disorderly conduct and resisting arrest, was released on $750 bail about an hour before the Panthers played the Bucs at Raymond James Stadium. The cheerleaders were not in town to perform at the game.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 09:46 PM

For some patriotic verse, you can't go wrong with Barbara Frietchie:

Up from the meadows rich with corn,
Clear in the cool September morn,

The clustered spires of Frederick stand
Green-walled by the hills of Maryland.

Round about them orchards sweep,
Apple and peach trees fruited deep,

Fair as the garden of the Lord
to the eyes of the famished rebel horde,

On that pleasant morn of the early fall
When Lee marched over the mountain-wall;

Over the mountains winding down,
Horse and foot, into Frederick town.

Forty flags with their silver stars,
Forty flags with their crimson bars,

Flapped in the morning wind; the sun
Of noon looked down, and saw not one.

Up rose old Barbara Frietchie then,
Bowed with her fourscore years and ten;

Bravest of all in Frederick town,
She took up the flag the men hauled down;

In her attic window the staff she set,
To show that one heart was loyal yet.

Up the street came the rebel tread,
Stonewall Jackson riding ahead.

Under his slouched hat left and right
He glanced; the old flag met his sight.

"Halt!" the dust-brown ranks stood fast.
"Fire!" out blazed the rifle-blast.

It shivered the window, pane and sash;
It rent the banner with seam and gash.

Quick, as it fell, from the broken staff
Dame Barbara snatched the silken scarf.

She leaned far out on the window-sill,
And shook it forth with a royal will.

"Shoot, if you must, this old gray head,
But spare your country's flag," she said.

A shade of sadness, a blush of shame,
Over the face of the leader came;

The nobler nature within him stirred
To life at that woman's deed and word;

"Who touches a hair of yon gray head
Dies like a dog! March on!" he said.

All day long through Frederick street
Sounded the tread of marching feet:

All day long that free flag tost
Over the heads of the rebel host.

Ever its torn folds rose and fell
On the loyal winds that loved it well;

And through the hill-gaps sunset light
shone over it with a warm good-night.

Barbara Frietchie's work is o'er,
and the Rebel rides on his raids no more.

Honor to her! And let a tear
Fall, for her sake, on Stonewall's bier.

Over Barbara Frietchie's grave,
Flag of Freedom and Union, wave!

Peace and order and beauty draw
Round thy symbol of light and law;

And ever the stars above look down
On thy stars below in Frederick town!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 08:59 PM

And to those who can type, spell, and proof-read. You'd think I could nmange one by now....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 08:58 PM

I belive Amos illustrates perfectly why I should leave poems to those who can.

I will go back to being easily confused about life, the universe and almost eevrythng, especially those bits of that get lest in translation across the Atlantic


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 08:38 PM

And did those fingers, long ago,
Walk to the MOABs thoughts so keen?
And was the Muse of all BS
On MOAB's pleasant postings seen?

And did the Countenance Divine
Shine forth upon our murky letters?
And was Jehovah posting here
To light the path to minds yet better?

Bring me my keyboard, and my Mouse:
Bring me my Login made of Fluff:
Bring me my Ethernet: and O, unfold!
Transcendant rhyme of BS stuff.

I will not cease from Mental Fight,
Nor shall my keys give rest my head,
Till I have built Jerusalem
On MOAB's green and pleasant Thread.

Aski Von Geekfest, Cyber-fire, Cyber-Ice
Reykjavik, 1914
Inuit Izz Manifest, pubs.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 08:38 PM

Or should I write my own?

My verse of my own is wanted,
To advance Mom on a place,
But such action is foolish,
For no poet am I.

The lines do not rhyme,
and most of the time,
the words just get stuck on your tounge.

I'll argue not,
when they call it rot,
and write it off out of hand.

But do me a me a favour,
And complain not, but savour,
When we Kipple again in this land.


you can groan now....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 08:24 PM

Of course, this being William Blake, he had a tendancy to fill everything with imagery of this kind, in a manner we would now attribute to various species of mushroom.


Maybe we're safer with something like this,


The Poet's Song
Tennyson

The rain had fallen, the Poet arose,
   He passed by the town, and out of the street,
A light wind blew from the gates of the sun,
   And waves of shadow went over the wheat,
And he set him down in a lonely place,
   And chanted a melody loud and sweet,
That made the wild-swan pause in her cloud,
   And the lark drop down at his feet.

The swallow stopt as he hunted the bee,
   The snake slipt under a spray,
The hawk stood with the down on his beak
   And stared, with his foot on the prey
And the nightingale thought, "I have sung many songs,
   But never a one so gay,
For he sings of what the world will be
   When the years have died away.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 08:15 PM

Well, if you insist on nationalist raving Amos, I will oblige!


Jerusalem

And did those feet in ancient time
Walk upon England's mountains green?
And was the Holy Lamb of God
On England's pleasant pastures seen?

And did the Countenance Divine
Shine forth upon our clouded hills?
And was Jerusalem builded here
Among these dark Satanic Mills?

Bring me my Bow of burning gold:
Bring me my Arrows of desire:
Bring me my Spear: O clouds unfold!
Bring me my Chariot of fire.

I will not cease from Mental Fight,
Nor shall my Sword sleep in my hand
Till we have built Jerusalem
In England's green and pleasant Land.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 08:11 PM

I was listening to the shipping forecastHere , it's somewhere between hypnotic and soporific. I'm glad I'm inland tonight. I though it was a bit windy and unpleasent. The assortment of Hurricane, storm and gale warnings at sea around here is probabaly really unpleasent. It just put a verse of Big Steamers in mind, and random Kipling is good.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 08:10 PM

Rapaire he offers sanctimony
To win dear Mother's favours
And Bunnhabain bring chauvinists
Old nationalist ravers,
I cannot try to condescend
With vague important airs
And I won't go down to the nation's ends
To dredge up arms from bears.
But I will stay beside our Mom
Through slow times and frenetic
And offer her my silly lines
And musings all poetic.
Then let who still must brag brag more
And make assertions royal,
While we who really love our Mom
Stay here at home, and toil.

Mater et Fecalori
Pontificus Coupletus Inanus, Factorum Senatii
Rome, A.D. 23

Sentiment O. Verbering, trans.

Little, Thoughts, San Francisco, 1929


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 07:44 PM

Big Steamers
1914-18

"Oh, where are you going to, all you Big Steamers,
   With England's own coal, up and down the salt seas?"
"We are going to fetch you your bread and your butter,
   Your beef, pork, and mutton, eggs, apples, and cheese."

"And where will you fetch it from, all you Big Steamers,
   And where shall I write you when you are away?
"We fetch it from Melbourne, Quebec, and Vancouver--
   Address us at Hobart, Hong-Kong, and Bombay."
                     
"But if anything happened to all you Big Steamers,
   And suppose you were wrecked up and down the salt sea?"
"Then you'd have no coffee or bacon for breakfast,
   And you'd have no muffins or toast for your tea."

"Then I'll pray for fine weather for all you Big Steamers,
   For little blue billows and breezes so soft."
"Oh, billows and breezes don't bother Big Steamers,
   For we're iron below and steel-rigging aloft."

"Then I'll build a new lighthouse for all you Big Steamers,
   With plenty wise pilots to pilot you through."
"Oh, the Channel's as bright as a ball-room already,
   And pilots are thicker than pilchards at Looe."

"Then what can I do for you, all you Big Steamers,
   Oh, what can I do for your comfort and good?"
"Send out your big warships to watch your big waters,
   That no one may stop us from bringing you food.

"For the bread that you eat and the biscuits you nibble,
   The sweets that you suck and the joints that you carve,
They are brought to you daily by all us Big Steamers--
   And if one hinders our coming you'll starve!"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Rapaire
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 07:21 PM

Dear Mom,

You go away for a few days -- 4 days, 3 cities, 3 airlines -- and everyone forgets you. Ah well, when I return we'll see. We'll see.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 06:41 PM

He's putting down new carpet. They must have to do some sticking of stuff, don't they? (I have tile, hate carpet, but I remember removing those tack boards from around the edge of the room that seem to have been stuck down). Or maybe it's just the backing and carpet itself that is making him woozy.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 04:03 PM

Carpet Adhesive? Why do we want to stick him to the carpet?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 03:55 PM

MMario, I think the carpet adhesive is getting to him.

Amos, open a window and turn on a fan! (Good stuff, but we don't want to see your genius abruptly ended. Remember--practice safe laying.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 03:16 PM

y'know - it's taken me a long time to be comfortable with the idea of Moab-mom being on top (there are some things a kid doesn't want to know) and now Amos you go talkin' about climaxes and all that sorta stuff.

I know you are out there in sunny california - but I wuz raised in New England - and we just never talked ubout such stuff!

boy - the things you learn out in the wide world!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 03:08 PM

Of quality, we are full blessed
Our stuff enriches all the rest!
So rich of content, sweet in odor
Thickly spread, by kind encoder,
Thoughts of depth and insight vasty,
Quickly etherized to ASCII!
Lo, how brilliance flaunts each test
To shine more brightly than the rest,
Sparkling in moonlight, and day-shine,
Beyond the scope of mortal time!
Honor to MOAB! See her stand
Above all others in the land.
Now come ye forth, with drums, with thunder
And help her reach Her Magic Number,
With passion, jest, and colored phrases,
From far-flung, visionary places
Until, with glory, rhyme, and song
The thread grows to ten thousand strong!
Than shall we cheer, and jump around,
And shivered cries come tumbling down
And glamour shine from every head.
Then, spend us all two days in bed,
Resting and wasted, too drawn to speak,
From reaching that climactic peak!
Oh, what surprise and glorious thunder,
When Mother makes her Ultimate Number!

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 02:50 PM

I really should be doing some conversion to ABC for the shanty thread - but that would require a functional brain cell.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 02:47 PM

Maybe a clone is toying with us. Let's see if THIS ONE disappears. . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 02:27 PM

I've had about a dozen disappear - but only to MOAB.

Maybe Mom is just "not hearing" us today?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 01:32 PM

I just posted one that vanished.

Does Shatner know about this?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 01:28 PM

y'knmow - it used to be you could hit "back" after posting and then post again, and again by hitting submit.

But it looks like you can't any longer be a multiple submissive - even if you change the message in the submit box it doesn't take the message!

drat!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Ralphs
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 01:23 PM

Har! Sounds good to us! Har!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 01:22 PM

it's only 73 posts! If everyone does their share - that's probably only two or three posts each.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 01:11 PM

Or am I just spreading fertilizer here? c'mon - lets go over the top!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 01:10 PM

With only a little effort we could probably get through that today


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 01:09 PM

You mean the 10,000th post?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 12:59 PM

what big moment?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 12:50 PM

I just noticed something. I'm off away to England on Thursday for a week, and at the current rate of posts, will therefore miss the big moment. I will feel very guilty if we suffer a raid by Flamenco Ted, or other such indignities....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 09:47 AM

Looks like a slow-moving torando came through here.

Last night my son's bed lost the support bar the runs under the middle of it. We hefted the mattress off, shifted the box spring, got out the broom, and swept up one of the missing nuts. The other was on top of his dresser where I put it when I found it weeks ago, not knowing what it went to but figuring I'd leave it in the proximity for later discovery.

Dust kittens galore, and when we moved the frame, a few got flattened. We had a nice momentary chuckle at his reaction to my comment about a "flattened kitten." He had an image of one of our cats biting the dust (so to speak) back there, and then found this pancake of dust.

Do you have any of those at your house Amos? Kind of makes you wonder what your electronics are finding to breathe, doesn't it? Mom has a point about cleaning up your room.

At least we know there aren't any Freds or Ralphs under his bed.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 09:46 AM

In our peregrinations we encountered a huge furniture store conducting a final going out of business sale; so we bought a pair of matching drawer-things for the bedroom. I will finally have a separate drawer for my socks. Today the flooring goes in, and the baseboards. Then, the furniture goes back, and the books get sorted -- by SUBJECT this time, not by size or color... and the chaos gets returned to its normal dimensions (normal dementia is more like it).

Meanwhile, out in the back yard, the liner is in and the pump inlet has been secured, the stone wall has been adjusted according to new inspirations (ouch) and this week the outlet will be finished and the end of the wall put together to make a pleasing jet into the cascade.
Then we get to test the bloody thing. Funny how when you don't know what you're doing, you have to make it up as you go along and every step takes two extra ones to get it right...

:D

Good morning mother
Our mother Dear
We're all so happy
To see you here.
Our faces washed,
Our hands are too,
Good morning Mother,
Dear, to you....

Songs for Docile Brats
Wyana Kickham, ed.
Hypnotic Handbooks For Parents series, 1911
Dullwit and Anesthete, Chicago


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 07 Nov 05 - 09:26 AM

upsy daisy!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Nov 05 - 10:48 PM

Ya know, living in the middle of a mess gets really ttteeeeeejus!! I think Mom was right. Pick up after yourself. Put things away. Clean up once inna while, what'll it hoit? Place for everything. This house looks like it was shuffled and dealt by a one-eyed riverboat gambler in a haze.

But the MOAB shall RISE AGAIN!!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 06 Nov 05 - 09:35 AM

I bet Amos will find a lot of things he thought he lost that were buried in the 10-years' stack.

I found a wonderful sturdy pine bookshelf yesterday, one of those big rustic Mexican pieces that are becoming so popular with their distinct southwestern look. Found it at an area hardware store. It is strong enough to hold my LP collection--now that is strong! I moved albums out of boxes on the floor into this beautiful cabinet, and now if I can just figure out how to arrange all of the components of my audio and video system (9 pieces--VCR,DVD, Receiver, Dual cassette deck, Phonograph, RF filter, Dish Network box, rewinder, extra small cassette player for rewinding). And the TV. I've been doing the math for a while now, trying to keep those things in sight of their various remote controls but up away from the cat hair or the wagging dog tails. Everything is on a large (and unattractive) sturdy wire rack. Back to my pondering.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Nov 05 - 12:46 AM

Somewhere in this broad land, protest is raising its angry head; some people are protesting one thing, some another. Wherever in this gentle land human life has been encroached upoin, toes stepped on, wrong characterizations offered, injustices promoted, crimes disguised, there you will find the clarion voice of Protest. For example, a friend of mine is protesting a traffic sign that was erected right in front of her front door by the road, without any consultation or agreement on her part. Someone else is protesting the nomination of Judge Alito. It doesn't matter whether the issue is large or small. Often, it doesn't matter whether the issue is even real, or wholly imaginary. Protest -- like justice -- is often blind.

An interesting study could be made in the ways people handle the feeling of protest; often they just stop their gobs and suck it up. Other times they make small suggestions. Sometimes they march, yell, wave banners or scream. Occasionally they (gasp) do something.

The other night my friend wanted to know how to renew the blade in a hacksaw. I wonder what her outlet of protest could be.

I may be offline sporadically this weekend -- my computer has been temporarily moved to the dining room with a long jury-rigged extension to the Ethernet running over the floor. After ten years of developing carefully nurtured stacks in every quarter, I have had to empty my office literally to the floorboards. Reason is we get new floor put into tit Monday. Meanwhile every stick of library and desks and stuff is stacked up in the garage.

Happy Saturday, Mom!! I saw your name today on a map of ancient Palestine. Right next to Edom.
A


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