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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

gnu 22 Apr 16 - 04:41 PM
Little Hawk 22 Apr 16 - 10:55 AM
gnu 21 Apr 16 - 07:47 PM
gnu 21 Apr 16 - 07:43 PM
Little Hawk 21 Apr 16 - 12:29 AM
Rapparee 20 Apr 16 - 08:19 PM
Little Hawk 20 Apr 16 - 10:54 AM
Rapparee 20 Apr 16 - 10:28 AM
JennyO 19 Apr 16 - 08:32 PM
Charley Noble 19 Apr 16 - 08:09 PM
Acme 19 Apr 16 - 08:01 PM
Rapparee 19 Apr 16 - 06:26 PM
gnu 19 Apr 16 - 01:55 PM
Little Hawk 19 Apr 16 - 10:25 AM
Rapparee 19 Apr 16 - 08:14 AM
Acme 18 Apr 16 - 10:08 PM
Little Hawk 18 Apr 16 - 04:40 PM
gnu 18 Apr 16 - 02:53 PM
Rapparee 18 Apr 16 - 07:36 AM
Rapparee 17 Apr 16 - 09:52 PM
Amos 17 Apr 16 - 12:29 AM
Rapparee 16 Apr 16 - 10:50 PM
Amos 16 Apr 16 - 09:59 PM
Acme 16 Apr 16 - 06:57 PM
Rapparee 15 Apr 16 - 09:05 PM
Amos 15 Apr 16 - 08:57 PM
gnu 15 Apr 16 - 07:04 PM
Acme 14 Apr 16 - 11:05 PM
Rapparee 14 Apr 16 - 09:58 PM
Little Hawk 14 Apr 16 - 09:21 PM
gnu 14 Apr 16 - 09:16 PM
Little Hawk 14 Apr 16 - 08:10 PM
Amos 14 Apr 16 - 08:00 PM
Little Hawk 14 Apr 16 - 06:01 PM
Rapparee 14 Apr 16 - 08:37 AM
Rapparee 14 Apr 16 - 08:27 AM
Acme 14 Apr 16 - 08:24 AM
Amos 14 Apr 16 - 01:28 AM
Little Hawk 14 Apr 16 - 01:23 AM
Acme 14 Apr 16 - 12:17 AM
Rapparee 13 Apr 16 - 11:37 PM
Little Hawk 13 Apr 16 - 11:06 PM
Rapparee 13 Apr 16 - 10:16 PM
Little Hawk 13 Apr 16 - 01:01 PM
Amos 13 Apr 16 - 10:47 AM
Rapparee 13 Apr 16 - 09:31 AM
Acme 12 Apr 16 - 09:56 PM
Amos 12 Apr 16 - 08:44 PM
Rapparee 12 Apr 16 - 09:14 AM
Little Hawk 11 Apr 16 - 11:32 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 22 Apr 16 - 04:41 PM

Cruzin up and down the road in My Mercury with the windows open. Feel the breeze!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 22 Apr 16 - 10:55 AM

"Suck it up?" Whaddya mean, "suck it up", buster? You talkin' tough with me? You want I should send a couple of hard talkin' gorillas over to your place to ventilate you? Izzat what you want? Coz if that's what you want, mister, I can arrange it, see? And lemme just add to that...I don't give a shit about Mike Duffy, see? I ain't lost a single wink of sleep worryin' about Mike Duffy. I got bigger fish to fry. You think Mike Duffy is big news? I don't. He don't amount to small potatoes on my street. You wanna obsess about Mike Duffy, that's yer business, bozo, but don't expect me to break out into a sweat over what don't even make an eyelid flicker around here. YOU suck it up, flatface.

(This has been an announcement in Chongo-ese.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 21 Apr 16 - 07:47 PM

Oh... Senator Mike Duffy. This is a BIG BIG deal up here in the Great White Frozen.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 21 Apr 16 - 07:43 PM

"But Chongo and Shane can't come back! (sob) Except through a 3rd party, meaning me."

This has already been discussted (yes, 't'). Suck it up. If I can do it, so can you. Use your imagination. Wait... ahhh... I'll think that over a bit. You know. The monkey thing. So many monkeys, so little circus. Your characters are amicable and broad but the monkeys tire me. Just sayin, eh? To each his own.

Well, I was on the edge of my keyboard for hours today reading the live blog. Three CBC reporters in the courtroom tweeting updates. It was far better than NHL hockey this year given that no Canuck teams are in the playoffs. And, ruling after ruling, I cheered!

And then, the last three charges were addressed in DRAMATIC fashion and The DUFF was FREE AT LAST! All 31 charges dismissed. This is a great day for Canadian justice... for Canada. I hope he sues the bastards all the way to the Crime Minister!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 21 Apr 16 - 12:29 AM

Those are pretty good... :)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Apr 16 - 08:19 PM

They could always register as actual users. Perhaps as "Stinkbody" or "Chimpchump" or "Dumbasastump" or "Neverprez".


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 20 Apr 16 - 10:54 AM

But Chongo and Shane can't come back! (sob) Except through a 3rd party, meaning me.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Apr 16 - 10:28 AM

Y'all come back now, ya hear!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: JennyO
Date: 19 Apr 16 - 08:32 PM

I also just came in to check for the first time in ages. I saw a discussion on Facebook about Mudcat, and I got to wondering if Mother was still alive and kickin'. I'm happy to see that she is! How well her children have looked after her all these years, even if they have resorted to speaking in tongues ;)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Charley Noble
Date: 19 Apr 16 - 08:09 PM

Just checking to see if this incredible thread was still alive and kicking.

Wow!

Charlie Ipcar, formerly known as Charley Noble


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 19 Apr 16 - 08:01 PM

I think the nail polish thing is a suburban legend (do they have chiggers in cities?). But I put some on this evening just in case.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Apr 16 - 06:26 PM

Assuming the diseases haven't set in. New research adds schistosomiosis and blackleg to the list of diseases spread by chiggers.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 19 Apr 16 - 01:55 PM

"Barriers to migration on the skin such as belts may be one reason that chigger bites also commonly occur at the waist or at other areas where their migration is prevented by compression from clothing." "A chigger bite itself is not noticeable. After the chigger has begun to inject digestive enzymes into the skin (usually after about 1-3 hours), symptoms and signs typically begin.
◾Pronounced itching is the most common symptom.
◾The area of the bite may be reddened, flat, or raised; sometimes it resembles a pustule or blister.
◾The itch is due to the presence of the stylostome and usually is most intense within 1-2 days after the bite.
◾The itching persists for several days, and complete resolution of the skin lesions can take up to two weeks."

Baking soda paste?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 19 Apr 16 - 10:25 AM

Chiggers. Another good reason to stay away from many parts of the USA.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Apr 16 - 08:14 AM

Put clear nail polish at the end of the critter's tunnel in your skin. Chiggers don't usually spread disease (except plague, dengue fever, scabies, Hansen's Disease and ebola), and it will cut off the air and the thing will die and be absorbed and excreted by your body.

Off to UIN this morn, but first I gotta pick up a horseless carriage.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 18 Apr 16 - 10:08 PM

Darn! You know that lawn I mowed on Saturday? I seem to have picked me up a chigger in the process, and that sucker itches like heck, right above the waistband of my jeans.

Scratch

Scratch

Scratch

Scratch

Scratch

Scratch

Scratch

Scratch

Scratch


Ahhhhh!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 18 Apr 16 - 04:40 PM

I predict that you will encounter Apes. Apes with guns.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 18 Apr 16 - 02:53 PM

Enjoy, Rap!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 Apr 16 - 07:36 AM

Okay, I'm off on another adventure.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Apr 16 - 09:52 PM

If you insist that you must.

Alas, poor Amos.
His fate is still unlearned.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 17 Apr 16 - 12:29 AM

Dang it, Bookman, a man's gotta do what he's gotta do. And I gotta ride that train to the end of the line. I appreciate your kind intentions, though; but put a sock in it, now.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Apr 16 - 10:50 PM

Don't do it! Don't do it! You'll be sorry, what with the sparks flying into the cars and burning holes in your clothes! And the soot and smell!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Apr 16 - 09:59 PM

Ayuh, near there. The train runs from Clarksdale along the edge of the Verde Valley, I hear tell. Air conditioned, even. Fancy that! :D


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 16 Apr 16 - 06:57 PM

MOM, I caught you at the bottom rung, but you still had a few hours before tumbling off the page. Good thing I came in to cool down from mowing the lawn. The Big Back Yard Lawn. In Spring. Tall wet lush grass that lugs the mower every few feet.

Amos, where is this place "Arizinona?" Anywhere near Phoenixiana?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Apr 16 - 09:05 PM

Don't go, Amos! That's the train to the Lost Dutchman! If the Apaches don't getcha you'll never come back, you'll never be right!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Apr 16 - 08:57 PM

Well, as I allus say, In infima mens vestibus indutus est maximus .".

Hey, Mom, did a great set5 last night backed up by a terrific bass player and fiddler and a drummer of great verve. Crowd loved it. We did "Cypress Grove Blues" and "Tonight We Ride" and Utah's "Goodnight Loving Trail" and "Vincent Black Lightning" and "Tangled up In Blue" and "Got My Mojo WOrking" and "Tying Knots in the Devil's Tale".

All in all a most satisfactory sally into the seamy side of San Diego nightlife.

Sunday morning we will hit the road for the highlands of Arizinona. We will take an antique train into a mysterious canyon. Not professionally, though.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 15 Apr 16 - 07:04 PM

Yeah, except I can't put an accelerator for Google Translate on Google Chrome (WTF is THAT about?). I use IE for Mudcat because I can use the accelerator and I like the ease of access because SOME people have a habit of posting in Latin. Show offs!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 14 Apr 16 - 11:05 PM

I thought everyone knew about typing "translate" (without the quotes) into the Google search bar. . . at one point in time, Yahoo cornered the market on quick translations, but Google bought them out or got a new one. Haven't thought about translating through Yahoo in years.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Apr 16 - 09:58 PM

Ipsum bonum! Tu puer bonus es!

Now for your next trick, please inform Shame of the McBrides what I wrote. Obviously he won't/can't/is incapable of doing anything about it. After all, the cowards never started and the weak died on the way. Shame never started and Chongx is quite sickly.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 14 Apr 16 - 09:21 PM

Okay, I got it...

Et Shame dixit, "Sed semper ubi sububi in caput meum!" et denuntiator Dana dixit, "Antiquis temporibus, nati tibi similes in rupibus ventosissimis exponebantur ad necem."


And Shame said, "But I always wear underwear on my head," and Officer Dana said, "In the good old days, children like you were left to perish on windswept crags."

HA! HA! HA! Wonderful! And it sounds so good in Latin!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 14 Apr 16 - 09:16 PM

Grunts, hoots, et sibilabit? Shit est Google Translate (that is Yoda latin).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 14 Apr 16 - 08:10 PM

I thought he just spoke in grunts, hoots, and whistles.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Apr 16 - 08:00 PM

Actually, you just need to disable Rapp's access to Google Translate. It's a sham erudition sorta thing he does. I guess he thinks his thoughts sound more distinguished in Latin than in the original Lithuanian.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 14 Apr 16 - 06:01 PM

I need a good Latin translating app...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Apr 16 - 08:37 AM

Et nunc, Chongx: Exemplum de simia, quae, quando plus ascendit, plus apparent posteriora eius. Fiducia virorum in sinistra non in dextra est, et ego ipse homo virtus!

Et Shame dixit, "Sed semper ubi sububi in caput meum!" et denuntiator Dana dixit, "Antiquis temporibus, nati tibi similes in rupibus ventosissimis exponebantur ad necem."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Apr 16 - 08:27 AM

Pauperes Grammaticam! Sit lucis!!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 14 Apr 16 - 08:24 AM

Stopped by the Legion hall, struck up a conversation with Rap. They must water down the whiskey, I can understand what I wrote last night . . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Apr 16 - 01:28 AM

If you can read this you can get a good jobbing knitting condoms in Nigeria.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 14 Apr 16 - 01:23 AM

In absentia luci, tenebrae vincunt.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 14 Apr 16 - 12:17 AM

Darned good conversation, Rap. The single malt had kicked in a bit, but I think it was still lucid. Photos tomorrow night (quilting, of course!) :)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Apr 16 - 11:37 PM

Si hoc signum legere potes, operis boni in rebus Latinis alacribus et fructuosis potiri potes, paulo aquila.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Apr 16 - 11:06 PM

"damnant quod non intellegunt"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Apr 16 - 10:16 PM

Such as golf balls in my backyard? Sometimes missing the bullseye by a fraction of a nanometer when I go shooting? Putting up with opinionated fools? The Legion Hovel running out of whiskey?

I have all of that now, except for the last. Like a UFO kidnapping me and making me Emperor of the Galaxy, it's quite unlikely.

As for that flea bitten, scruffy, Chongx -- de minimus non curat meo.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Apr 16 - 01:01 PM

What the snow has to do with, Rap, is God's punishment for your scurrilous and unfounded attacks upon Chongo. You are going to suffer 7 terrible plagues. The snow is the first and the mildest. I'd tell you what's coming next, but I don't think you could handle it, so best just to wait and let you find out for yourself.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Apr 16 - 10:47 AM

On closer examination it was found that the snowflakes falling on the property line at Rapp's place have one flat side, and the tolerance of irregularity where they lay on the dividing line is less than three thou. Scientists are unable to explain the physics of such a phenomenon and have suggested consulting a numerologist, but Rapparree has announced he has other ideas and is planning to hire Chongo Chimp to investigate the peculiar metaphysics of the situation.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Apr 16 - 09:31 AM

It snowed! Several inches of the stuff now cover my lawn, driveway, and house and it's still coming down rather heavily. The temperature is -12F.

Only my house. The everything ends at my property line. Except for here it's a bright, sunny day. Except for here the birdies are singing; here dire wolves are howling. There is a woolly mammoth in my backyard.   

I think it has to do with climate change or something.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 12 Apr 16 - 09:56 PM

Sorry, Rap. You're giving that orangutan a bad name by even hinting at a relationship to Chongo.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Apr 16 - 08:44 PM

SOmetimes I have to acknowledge how grateful I am that this crumb is imaginary.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Apr 16 - 09:14 AM

The only known photo of Chongx's father. And now, after much research among bad photographs, here is the ONLY know photo of Chongx as a baby. True chimps did not want this released, but I finally convinced them that it should be shared with the world. It seems like Chongx's caudalcranial lack of pilus in a ventral strip is an embarrassment to all members of both the catarrhini and plathyrrhine.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Apr 16 - 11:32 PM

Same as Chongo, eh?


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