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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Acme 17 Oct 07 - 04:44 PM
Rapparee 17 Oct 07 - 01:34 PM
Amos 17 Oct 07 - 01:14 PM
MMario 17 Oct 07 - 12:10 PM
Amos 17 Oct 07 - 12:03 PM
MMario 17 Oct 07 - 11:47 AM
Rapparee 17 Oct 07 - 11:26 AM
Acme 17 Oct 07 - 11:11 AM
MMario 17 Oct 07 - 10:57 AM
Amos 17 Oct 07 - 10:35 AM
Rapparee 17 Oct 07 - 08:52 AM
Acme 17 Oct 07 - 12:34 AM
Amos 17 Oct 07 - 12:28 AM
Amos 16 Oct 07 - 03:30 PM
Rapparee 16 Oct 07 - 12:57 PM
Amos 16 Oct 07 - 12:48 PM
Acme 16 Oct 07 - 10:50 AM
Amos 16 Oct 07 - 09:51 AM
Rapparee 16 Oct 07 - 08:58 AM
Amos 16 Oct 07 - 07:43 AM
Rapparee 15 Oct 07 - 09:25 PM
Acme 15 Oct 07 - 09:11 PM
Amos 15 Oct 07 - 07:45 PM
Acme 15 Oct 07 - 07:16 PM
Rapparee 15 Oct 07 - 06:35 PM
Amos 15 Oct 07 - 04:27 PM
Rapparee 15 Oct 07 - 02:57 PM
Amos 15 Oct 07 - 02:48 PM
Rapparee 15 Oct 07 - 12:51 PM
Rapparee 15 Oct 07 - 12:42 PM
Amos 15 Oct 07 - 10:03 AM
Rapparee 15 Oct 07 - 08:58 AM
Amos 14 Oct 07 - 11:38 PM
Rapparee 14 Oct 07 - 09:44 PM
Amos 14 Oct 07 - 09:31 PM
Rapparee 14 Oct 07 - 02:45 PM
Amos 14 Oct 07 - 11:13 AM
Rapparee 13 Oct 07 - 10:50 PM
Acme 13 Oct 07 - 10:34 PM
Rapparee 13 Oct 07 - 09:18 PM
Rapparee 13 Oct 07 - 09:16 PM
Rapparee 13 Oct 07 - 08:44 PM
Rapparee 13 Oct 07 - 02:43 PM
Amos 13 Oct 07 - 01:33 PM
Acme 13 Oct 07 - 01:11 PM
Rapparee 13 Oct 07 - 10:58 AM
Rapparee 13 Oct 07 - 10:56 AM
Amos 13 Oct 07 - 10:28 AM
Rapparee 13 Oct 07 - 08:10 AM
Amos 13 Oct 07 - 01:32 AM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 17 Oct 07 - 04:44 PM

I whack it off with a shovel.

(sounds like something other than lawn care, doesn't it?)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Oct 07 - 01:34 PM

Dose 'em with uric acid! Give 'em gout! Make 'em suffer!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 17 Oct 07 - 01:14 PM

Deponent sayeth not...



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 17 Oct 07 - 12:10 PM

hmmm - are you referring to the uric acid that comes in pre-mixed solution?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 17 Oct 07 - 12:03 PM

OR uric acid from organic sources...


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 17 Oct 07 - 11:47 AM

or bleach


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Oct 07 - 11:26 AM

Do what my grandma did.

Dump salt on 'em.

It's natural, it's organic....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 17 Oct 07 - 11:11 AM

Holds hands out in front of face, index fingers crossed

SSSSshhhhhhh! We don't use that word around here! This is an organic yard, without harmful chemcials, and I live a few yards from a creek, so anything that goes on the yard is bound to end up in the water after a little while. Vinegar has been used on this before and worked, but I didn't follow through and the grass has created its own little ecosystem and mulched soil on the concrete and is thriving as it captures more dirt and nutrients. So I'm picking up these little islands of sod that are anchored in place by the crack in the concrete.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 17 Oct 07 - 10:57 AM

keep in mind that cornerstones, in general, take getting laid a lot less seriously than, say, high-school juniors

You have got to be kidding!

Even a cursory study of the subject will tell you that cornerstones exist to get laid. Granted, most of them do it only once, and then just lie their quiescient for the remainder of their lifetimes; but to get laid is the be-all and end-all of a cornerstones existance.

JUST like most high school juniors.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 17 Oct 07 - 10:35 AM

No, it was definitely possibly laid maybe on October 16, 1907. Senator James Brady may have spoken at the original event, and we're pretty sure the stone was perhaps cemented into place by the Masons in a silver trowel ceremony

We should keep in mind that cornerstones, in general, take getting laid a lot less seriously than, say, high-school juniors.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Oct 07 - 08:52 AM

Long-term Roundup, Stilly. Works wonders on plants in driveway cracks.

Gonna be 46 F. and 60% chance of precipitation today.

We had the doin's yesterday inside, as it was "raw" outdoors. 73 people, and we went through 2.5 sheeet cakes (the staff got the rest).

I want to get something for the staff to say "Thank you."

At 10 a.m. I have a staff pre-Agenda meeting so that tomorrow I can attend the Council pre-agenda meeting so that I might have to attend the Council meeting tomorrow evening so that we can accept another US $5K or so for additional computers for the public. Dumb, dumb, dumb.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 17 Oct 07 - 12:34 AM

Drizzly today so the roofers weren't out in the neighborhood, but they are scheduled to roof a house up the street this week, so will stop by to give me samples and we can update the quote.

I can't afford a new stone or cobbled driveway like Amos or my next door neighbors, but out of solidarity I did go out this weekend and start digging the big patches of grass out of the cracks that run the length of my drive. After yesterday's rain I should get more done if I attack it again tomorrow evening. (Sick kid activities today, no leisure for yard work.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 17 Oct 07 - 12:28 AM

The driveway is beautiful, but on testing the sprinkler circuits (all of which were cut and re-glued during the replacement of the driveway) I find one of the circuits has been divided between two valves, and another of the circuits has been left unconnected. Verya nnoying. Some of the pavers will have to be taken up and the gluing redone for those connections.

But my son is doing great, and Barky is doing great, and life is still good. Stilly, Barky is not full time yet with the All Women's Band so her photo is not in the website pictures.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Oct 07 - 03:30 PM

"Helen being chosen found life flat and dull
And later had much trouble from a fool,
While that great Queen, that rose out of the spray,
Being fatherless could have her way
Yet chose a bandy-leggèd smith for man.
It's certain that fine women eat
A crazy salad with their meat
Whereby the Horn of Plenty is undone. "

--Yeats, "Prayer for My Daughter"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Oct 07 - 12:57 PM

The Democratic Party just replaced the 5 x 8 foot flag that was stolen from the pole in front of the Library. In about 1.5 hours the next round of centennial stuff starts. The mellerdramer we had last evening, "Alaska, or the Mountain Beyond," attracted 120 people.

I hope this day's speechifyin' will be less well attended, even though we will have birthday cake.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Oct 07 - 12:48 PM

I think you wouold do all right with fiberglass shingles, in a lighter color so as to reduce heat absorption.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 16 Oct 07 - 10:50 AM

Is she in one of those photos, Amos?

Rap, we're looking at $10K as well on our little roof because I have to put in some serious ventilation to spare future roofs (and perhaps our heating/cooling bill). Metal is way expensive (the raised seam variety). Several neighbors have metal shingles made to look like shakes. Several neighbors still have the original shakes on houses 30 and more years old. They repair them every so often. There are fibreglass shingles and asphalt shingles. Metal would be nice, but way over the budget, I fear.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Oct 07 - 09:51 AM

I have gone to work, and am at work, and shall go to work again tomorrow and tomorrow, creeping in this petty pace from day to day to help build a good life for myself, and my BBW, and my best-beloved Barky. Who, by the way, sat in as first trumpet with Ellen Seeling's Montclair Women's Big Band last month and pulled off an impeccable performance on her golden horn, solos and all.

But no, I was just saying thanks to Mom. I am in a mood today, feeling blessed by all the beauty in my life -- including the ineffable, profound, elevating and illuminating radiance of a thread of BS over twenty thousand posts long.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Oct 07 - 08:58 AM

You going somewhere? (I'm going to go to work, myself.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Oct 07 - 07:43 AM

Woes of home ownership. Just been through the lot from A to Z. We bought a large beautiful classic urn to stand in the corner of the new pavement where there is a square of space next the entry. Looks absolutely great.

Hey Mom, thanks for all the good times.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Oct 07 - 09:25 PM

We will probably re-roof next year, probably Spring. We're looking at metal made to look like the shakes we have now. Wooden roofs in wildfire country...sheesh. We'll also replace the wooden columns out front, which are starting to rot.

We're probably looking at $10K, but it's gotta be done.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 15 Oct 07 - 09:11 PM

We had a super hot summer last year. And over the winter there was this one ice event that nailed the shingles. After that, it has been a steady rain of grit coming off of the roof every time it rains. The roofer said it was also probably heat, but he'd write it up as hail and see if the insurance folks were paying attention.

They were, darn it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Oct 07 - 07:45 PM

It seems unlikely the roof was distorted by heat when it started during a high wind. They can't just ignore that datum. I'd get a second opinion and an appeal line of some kind, get some photos from before the windstorm if possible. Don't roll over to these guys.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 15 Oct 07 - 07:16 PM

I've dropped in to read a couple of times today. I'm glad to see you two getting along. I've been busy.

I need a new roof. The insurance adjustor(er?) says mine looks the way it does because of heat damage, not hail, even though the roof started looking like crap after a big storm blew through last spring. So I must find the funding because they don't pay to replace cooked roofs. Oy. There's a bucket in the attic under a leak that turned up a couple of weeks ago. I didn't want it dripping onto and through the ceiling of my office. I'll have to go empty that bucket tonight because it has rained all day. The roofers will come over later in the week to give me a quote that doesn't reference the insurance company restrictions and requirements, and we'll work from there. (I have a very expensive 40-year roof, except it is asphault which isn't a good choice in a hot climate and the house didn't have enough ventilation to keep the roof cool enough. If approved, the insurance company would replace comparable shingles, but I don't need to, and I would rather put on something a little less pricey but more durable.)

I need a nap, MOM. You two carry on.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Oct 07 - 06:35 PM

"My Grandfather was a Republican, my father was a Republican, and I am proud to say that I, too, am a Republican!" the speaker declaimed.

"Sure and have you no ambition at all, man?" shouted the good Father O'Reilly.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Oct 07 - 04:27 PM

The same Father O'Reilly who voted for Bush at least twice, some say five times?? That aul' druidic sod!!

He got a bit of needed comeuppance from the six-year old Shaughnessy girl, last month. She was pulling a little red wagon down the street with a shoebox of newborn puppies in it. And he stopped and goo-goo'd over the same, and said, "What kind of puppies are they, then, Maureen?" And the lass replied as quick as a wink, "Well, they're Republican puppies, of course, Father!".

He was so tickled that later that week he insisted that Sister Catherine come with him down the block to see this wonderful little girl, and sure neough they found Maureen Shaughnessy tending her wagon with the puppies in it, they now squirming around and yapping.

"So, Maureen," says the Father, "Tell Sister Catherine what sort of puppies youhave ther, won't you?"

"Sure, and they're Liberal puppies, Sister!" replied Maureen.

"Now, Maureen!!", says the Father. "Didn't you tell me last week they were Republican puppies?".

"Oh, I did, Father, right enough." says the lass. "But that was before they had their eyes open."


Badabing badabong.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Oct 07 - 02:57 PM

Didja hear about the time Father O'Reilly was walking back to the rectory and met Dolores O'Shaughnessy, Lady Of The Evening? She said to him, "Hey, Padre. Twenny bucks for a good time. You innerrested?"

The good priest replied, "Sure, and shame upon you Dolores O'Shaughnessy! Selling your body on the street."

Dolores replied, "Okay, okay, so you're not interested."

The very next day he met her again and said to her, "Dolores, I prayed for you last night!"

To which she said, "Sure, Father, ye should have phoned and I'd have come right over."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Oct 07 - 02:48 PM

Your period as an altar boy was marked by ..um... certain other adventures into the realm of the corporeal which are better off left unmentioned, bro, both for the sake of your own good name (long may it shine!) and the memory of dear departed father O'Reilly, long may he be forgotten, and of whose shenanigans the less said the better. So, mayhap we'd best not go there, eh?

My meds, as always consist of black coffee and cheap cigars, as needed.

Don't even TRY to mess with 'em!! :D


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Oct 07 - 12:51 PM

STILL off the med, huh Amos? You know darned good and well that I was an altar boy from the age of 8 until I left high school and then I went directly into the Army where they wouldn't allow such things. After that I went into the Seminary and only left because the rector caught me with Dolores O'Shaugnessy in my cell Mom was ill and needed constant nursing care and you were out carousing all day and night (yes, yes, I know you were the Carousal Critic for the newspaper, but still!).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Oct 07 - 12:42 PM

2,407 people inside on Saturday according to actual count. Another couple hundred outside who never came inside, by estimate. 18 couples chased out of the bushes by irate parents, 3 (so far) conceptions, no fights that amounted to anything.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Oct 07 - 10:03 AM

Seems to me, Goode Rapaire, that Momme is lucky to have to strapping young loudmouths like ourselves to help her along, and there is no need for either of us to invent whole-cloth fictitious slurs about the other.

I never told Mom about you and the Great Dane; I was a gentleman about helping you clean up after that "bachelor stag party" thing, and sneak your befouled dress shirt into the laundry when Mom wasn't looking. I never mentioned a word to her about the time Sally Leonski missed her period for two weeks and how scared you were. And who smuggled Patty Wallworth's bra out of your bedroom for you when Mom was coming in to make the bed?


So gimme a break here, bro.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Oct 07 - 08:58 AM

And let ME return you to your proper pinnacle of glory today! (As you and I know, Amos is easily distracted these days, what with the flashbacks and everything. If he would ONLY take his meds!)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Oct 07 - 11:38 PM

How now, Fayre Momme? Wilt falle to the Lower Chakra of darkness and disorder? Say not so, but rise up with me, here, to your natural home at the top of all posts, the crowning glory of all threads.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Oct 07 - 09:44 PM

You've reached a level of maturity when you realize that just because you can doesn't mean you should.

And you've realized a certain level of marital maturity when you realize that you'd bloody well better.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Oct 07 - 09:31 PM

Better than being a Hunted, to be sure.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Oct 07 - 02:45 PM

It is said that you truly become worthy of the title "Hunter" when you can kill the animal and, because you don't need the meat or simply because of something about the animal, you don't.

I know several Hunters.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Oct 07 - 11:13 AM

A man came to dinner who had recently been on several adventures, driving from Tangiers to Cairo along the northern rim of Africa, going to Pamplona to run with the bulls, and going on a hunting safari in Kenya with a Ruark type of guide. He shot the camp's dinner from the huge herds of gallivanting springboks and other gazelles.

Near the end of the safari the guide told him there was an old bull elephant who should be put down, due to his advanced age, known to be in a certain area, and that the guide had one elephant on his license -- so would he like to go for this one? M. had always wanted a pair of great tusks to put over the door of his den at home. So they went into the wild in search of this kingly elephant, and for four days they slept in trees, and walked the earth in their quest. And they found the elephant.

They approached him, Indian style, with great caution, and very slowly, until they were only forty yards away from him. The elephant had enormous, ancient tusks. He was dozing, standing up, under a tree, and M., carefully instructed by the guide where to place his shot, moved into position with his magnificent .500 Holland and Holland.

He told us, "And I aimed carefully, and then I said "Bang". I just couldn't do it. I had tears in my eyes."

We applauded him for sparing the old elephant.

The elephant, being of great age, will be taken, some day, by another man, or he will be brought down by leopards. But M. will live on, for a while, burnished by the karma of the remarkable moment when he aimed and said "Bang!".

A

And here is a collection of the most wonderful film images ever recorded, by Chuck Workman, for your viewing pleasure.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Oct 07 - 10:50 PM

No, it was definitely possibly laid maybe on October 16, 1907. Senator James Brady may have spoken at the original event, and we're pretty sure the stone was perhaps cemented into place by the Masons in a silver trowel ceremony. I wanted to get James Brady to speak, but I couldn't dig him up and the cemetery was decidedly unhelpful in it. So I've settled on having
Minnie Howard come talk -- after all, she convinced Carnegie to give the money, the town to back the effort, and the city council to support the library (you didn't cross Doctor Minnie!).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 13 Oct 07 - 10:34 PM

From that second link:

Tuesday afternoon, a dedication ceremony will be held at the library.

The cornerstone was laid on October 16th, 2007.


Today is October 13, 2007. Either "was" is a poor choice of words or there is a typo. Maybe 1907? Are you still on the same site, same building, for the last 100 years?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Oct 07 - 09:18 PM

More stuff.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Oct 07 - 09:16 PM

Some stuff.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Oct 07 - 08:44 PM

It's over, at least until Tuesday afternoon. There were about 700 people who attended. A good time was, I hope, had by all -- in spite of 60 degree weather and early drizzle.

You really should have been there.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Oct 07 - 02:43 PM

No, but we have cannonfire and a gunfight scheduled -- as well as fiddling and Indian Dancing and Greek damsels dancing and other stuff.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Oct 07 - 01:33 PM

Well I hope your attiude to those who do make is a little less condescending and sardonic than your last post was, Rapaire. Otherwise they will be rededicating your cornerstone with you inside it.

Fortunately for the repute of the MPL, and the putative esteem in which its director is held locally, I shall not be able to make the celebration, where I might be tempted to let the cat out of the bag.

You do have a cat in a bag, as part of the celebration, don't you?

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 13 Oct 07 - 01:11 PM

This was the one I planned that great road trip for.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Oct 07 - 10:58 AM

Look, Oh Unaware One, here, click upon "Centennial Celebration," and be enlightened.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Oct 07 - 10:56 AM


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Oct 07 - 10:28 AM

Not one stone shalt thou touch, varlet.

What party do you have today, sir?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Oct 07 - 08:10 AM

Would a pound of gunpowder help it along?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Oct 07 - 01:32 AM

I just gpt back from the party.

Our new driveway is BEAUTIFUL!


A


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