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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Acme 18 Jul 05 - 12:02 PM
Amos 18 Jul 05 - 10:07 AM
Rapparee 18 Jul 05 - 08:58 AM
Rapparee 17 Jul 05 - 11:32 PM
Acme 17 Jul 05 - 11:21 PM
Amos 17 Jul 05 - 11:12 PM
Acme 17 Jul 05 - 10:56 PM
Rapparee 17 Jul 05 - 10:40 PM
Amos 17 Jul 05 - 10:26 PM
Acme 17 Jul 05 - 11:05 AM
Amos 17 Jul 05 - 11:01 AM
rumanci 17 Jul 05 - 11:00 AM
Rapparee 17 Jul 05 - 10:55 AM
rumanci 17 Jul 05 - 10:43 AM
Amos 17 Jul 05 - 10:35 AM
Acme 17 Jul 05 - 10:16 AM
Bunnahabhain 17 Jul 05 - 07:50 AM
Bunnahabhain 17 Jul 05 - 07:36 AM
Amos 16 Jul 05 - 03:39 PM
Rapparee 16 Jul 05 - 02:21 PM
Bunnahabhain 16 Jul 05 - 02:02 PM
Rapparee 16 Jul 05 - 01:49 PM
Acme 16 Jul 05 - 01:38 PM
Rapparee 16 Jul 05 - 01:37 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 16 Jul 05 - 12:49 PM
Amos 16 Jul 05 - 10:25 AM
Acme 16 Jul 05 - 01:13 AM
Rapparee 16 Jul 05 - 01:08 AM
Amos 15 Jul 05 - 09:37 PM
Rapparee 15 Jul 05 - 08:23 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 15 Jul 05 - 08:11 PM
GUEST,MMario 15 Jul 05 - 12:46 PM
Amos 15 Jul 05 - 12:41 PM
Rapparee 15 Jul 05 - 11:39 AM
Amos 15 Jul 05 - 11:30 AM
GUEST,MMario 15 Jul 05 - 11:08 AM
Acme 15 Jul 05 - 11:01 AM
GUEST 15 Jul 05 - 10:39 AM
Amos 15 Jul 05 - 10:17 AM
GUEST,Bee-dubya-ell 15 Jul 05 - 12:40 AM
Amos 14 Jul 05 - 11:40 PM
Rapparee 14 Jul 05 - 11:14 PM
khandu 14 Jul 05 - 10:54 PM
khandu 14 Jul 05 - 10:53 PM
Acme 14 Jul 05 - 10:45 PM
GUEST,Bee-dubya-ell 14 Jul 05 - 09:32 PM
Amos 14 Jul 05 - 12:05 PM
GUEST 14 Jul 05 - 09:56 AM
Rapparee 14 Jul 05 - 09:54 AM
GUEST,MMario 14 Jul 05 - 09:48 AM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 18 Jul 05 - 12:02 PM

Whatever obfuscation you throw our way, Rapaire, I can see I scored a direct hit!

BINGO!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 18 Jul 05 - 10:07 AM

Rap:

No-one even TRIED to say "Touche" here, that I can see. What is that set you off so?

Mom, Rap is just brown-nosing you to cover up for being retarded this morning. He'll be fine with some coffee, though. It's not his fault. It's all that bluing he's been breathing, or maybe he swallowed some guncotton.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 Jul 05 - 08:58 AM

Good morning, Mother!

See, Mom? I didn't forget! I was able to wish you a good morning! The first one to do so, too, I will point out.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Jul 05 - 11:32 PM

Touche'? Nobody says that anymore. When you have made a point on the piste, either a buzzer goes off and lights light up or, if (like me) you do not use electrical scoring devices you simply acknowledge a hit. A hit is generally acknowledged in one of two ways:

1. you say, "A good hit!" or,
2. you scream "AAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!," pull the blade from your body and, trying not to get blood and/or gore all over the place, expire like the gentleperson you are. Forgiving the person who holed you is optional (but recommended). Poisoned blades are considered declasse' at best; calling your opponent a "rotten, slimy, backstabbing, ill-bred, louse-covered, bastard child of a hedge whore" is impolite whether or not it is true.

Nobody says "Touche'!" anymore.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 17 Jul 05 - 11:21 PM

Amos, that makes sense, his familiarity with the Raparian environment. I am concerned at the number of brain cells sloughing off with this exercise, though.


Touché!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 17 Jul 05 - 11:12 PM

Apun, my word Rapaire is obviously not familiar with sloughs, but is more acquent with Egyptian Riverine language games, based on de Nile.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 17 Jul 05 - 10:56 PM

Yup! That describes puns!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Jul 05 - 10:40 PM

Puns? Puns? We don't make no steenkin' puns here! We engage in literate wordplay of the highest order, rejoicing in the richness and variety of English and other languages while extracting and enjoying the humor inherent in them.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 17 Jul 05 - 10:26 PM

And a slew of sighs for your Dad, as well.

Wishing he were still among us.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 17 Jul 05 - 11:05 AM

The only reason I'm not jumping into this one is because my father and I already slew this pun years ago, on a memorable drive between Everett and Marysville. We crossed Ebey Slough and it started. . .

(This is a very fond memory of my dear departed Dad--the puns were reliably pungent and prolific.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 17 Jul 05 - 11:01 AM

A slew of sighs for sorry Slough
Who can't sluff off her name, somehow.
Who chosen was to represent
(By some poetic malcontent)
All that is tinsel, cheap and slack
I wish that he could take it back!
But he thought such a poem was wise
And sloughs off all my slough of sighs.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: rumanci
Date: 17 Jul 05 - 11:00 AM

Dammit Rap
That slew my next line and threw me off the sense
:-P


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Jul 05 - 10:55 AM

Damnit all, when you see "slough"
Remember that it rhymes with "blue"
Because the plural form is "sloughs"
And it was in the land of sloughs
That birth was given to The Blues.*







*And I don't mean those sissy prissy Oxonians, either!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: rumanci
Date: 17 Jul 05 - 10:43 AM

It is Slough to rhyme with cow
It is slow when it's time to go
It is also slough but not like a trough or a troth
Time to go .....had enough ?
I bough to your superior knowledge   *bg*

rum (to rhyme with anything you like round here it seems - and quite often PUNgently !! lol)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 17 Jul 05 - 10:35 AM

Dear Bunn:

The spelling you pronounce as Slaow
Has several meanings, forms and uses.
Some speak it "sluff" and some say "slew"
Depending on what they mean to do
And we should leave them to it, too,
Withholding all abuses
Of which we have so much more than enaow.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 17 Jul 05 - 10:16 AM

Who wants to fool around with boats? You can come build a stockade fence alongside my back yard.

signed
Tom Sawyer


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 17 Jul 05 - 07:50 AM

Somr time later, the poem was condensed, following an infamous civic art installation.

Come friendly bombs and fall on Slough,
Home of the concrete cow!

However as Google reveals, the concrete cows are actually in Milton Keynes. I haven't time to find the Douglas Adams description of the place, as I'm going to go mess about in boats. The water is less than 10 C. Can you tell I'm British?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 17 Jul 05 - 07:36 AM

Slough? Slough!?
It is pronounced as below.

Slough- John Betjeman

Come friendly bombs and fall on Slough!
It isn't fit for humans now,
There isn't grass to graze a cow.
Swarm over, Death!

Come, bombs and blow to smithereens
Those air -conditioned, bright canteens,
Tinned fruit, tinned meat, tinned milk, tinned beans,
Tinned minds, tinned breath.

Mess up the mess they call a town-
A house for ninety-seven down
And once a week a half a crown
For twenty years.

And get that man with double chin
Who'll always cheat and always win,
Who washes his repulsive skin
In women's tears:

And smash his desk of polished oak
And smash his hands so used to stroke
And stop his boring dirty joke
And make him yell.

But spare the bald young clerks who add
The profits of the stinking cad;
It's not their fault that they are mad,
They've tasted Hell.

It's not their fault they do not know
The birdsong from the radio,
It's not their fault they often go
To Maidenhead

And talk of sport and makes of cars
In various bogus-Tudor bars
And daren't look up and see the stars
But belch instead.

In labour-saving homes, with care
Their wives frizz out peroxide hair
And dry it in synthetic air
And paint their nails.

Come, friendly bombs and fall on Slough
To get it ready for the plough.
The cabbages are coming now;
The earth exhales.


Slough
by John Betjeman (1906 - 1984)

John Betjeman published his poem about Slough in 1937 in the collected works Continual Dew. Slough was becoming increasingly industrial and some housing conditions were very cramped. In willing the destruction of Slough, Betjeman urges the bombs to pick out the vulgar profiteers but to spare the bald young clerks. He really was very fond of his fellow human beings. Slough is much improved nowadays and he might be pleasantly surprised by a stroll there.


brereton@cdr.stanford.edu


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Jul 05 - 03:39 PM

I would suggest:

"Have made me feeling like a toff" or
"I think I'll go and have a boff", or perhaps, "
Excuse me while I hide a cough", or even, "
And then this thin pretense I'll slough", except it is usually pronounced 'sluff', or
"It's time for me to go alof'" or
"As written by a Romanov", or
"Writ with my Kalishnikov", or even
"And then my hat I'll kindly doff".

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Jul 05 - 02:21 PM

Excuse me, but that should be either "oss" or "loff". "Loff" might be preferable, since it's obviously a poem from 18th Century, when the "f-type" S was in vogue.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 16 Jul 05 - 02:02 PM

Round in circles BS goes,
If it ends, no one knows,
It changes shape and speed and size,
As fast as politicians lies,
Verse and physics, in a blend,
It's driven us lot round the Bend,
Just two more lines, to round this off,
Have left me at a total loss.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Jul 05 - 01:49 PM

Yes, I knew that. But it's only part of The Secret.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 16 Jul 05 - 01:38 PM

The secret is



Compost!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Jul 05 - 01:37 PM

"I say, Smedley. Have you heard about Reggie?"
"Why no, Charles. What is it?"
"He's living in a tree in Borneo with an Orangatang."
"Good Lord! Male or female?"
"Female, of course! Nothing queer about old Reggie!"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 16 Jul 05 - 12:49 PM

Those scientist fellers are dead wrong! There ain't nothin' queer about the Universe. They're just lookin' in th' wrong places. If they would put more of their efforts toward understanding BS, they'd have it all figured out in no time. The answer isn't in the stars or inside the atom! It's in the pie, the pile and the flop! Just ask the stool. The stool knows!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Jul 05 - 10:25 AM

London delegates to a global conference on the future have been warned that our universe may be just "too queer" to understand.

Richard Dawkins, the professor and "Selfish Gene" author from Oxford University, said we were living in what he called a "middle world" reality that we have created, the BBC reported Friday.

Experts in design, technology, and entertainment have gathered in Oxford to share their ideas about the future our futures. It is the first time the annual event, known as TED Global, has been held in Europe. In the past, it has been a U.S. event.

Dawkins' opening talk, in a session called Meme Power, explored the ways in which humans invent their own realities to make sense of the infinitely complex worlds they are in.

"Are there things about the universe that will be forever beyond our grasp, in principle, ungraspable in any mind, however superior?" he asked. "Successive generations have come to terms with the increasing queerness of the Universe."




Increasing queerness? Or just the same amount, more openly discussed?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 16 Jul 05 - 01:13 AM

MMario,

There's some powerful stool on my gardening shoe right now, holding up some work I had to do around the house. That's because I won't let this shoe back into the house until the stool stops being so powerful.

Darned dog. Left a steaming pile right in front of the side door into the garage.

This is the same dog, by the way, who this morning watched me, then my son step carefully over the dog-proof chicken wire that surrounds the veggie garden. She then happily hopped over to join us.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Jul 05 - 01:08 AM

The possibilities beggars the imagination: condoms, for one.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Jul 05 - 09:37 PM

To which he replied "You were supposed to think of that before you left to come here!"

In other, more sturdy new: Sponges with pores only nanometers in diameter could help lead to advanced fuel cells in hydrogen-powered cars, as well as super-coolants to keep perishable drugs fresh and devices to clean out toxins in the body, experts told UPI's Nano World.

The current market for such nanoporous and microporous adsorbents is $1.77 billion and is expected to rise to $2.12 billion by 2012, noted technical market research firm Business Communications Company in Norwalk, Conn.

"The market for these nanoporous adsorbents will grow much more rapidly in dollar value than the microporous adsorbents," said Ravindra Deshpande, a market-research analyst in Harrisburg, Pa.

Adsorbents stick to any number of chemicals.They find use in everything from pet litter, where they soak up odors, to environmental remediates, where they help draw out toxins.The greater the surface area they have, the more molecules they can stick to.As the size of the pores on an adsorbent decreases, it offers more surface area per unit volume of the product.

"We have several thousand meters square per gram.Imagine five football fields in one gram of material," said Doug Smith, president of nanoporous adsorbent manufacturing company NanoPore in Albuquerque, N.M.

NanoPore has developed nanoporous adsorbents that soak up air and thus act highly effectively as thermal insulation."We'll have nanoporous insulation winging up in the space shuttle," Smith said."People like Boeing and General Electric are our customers."

The real value of nanoporous adsorbents is how they enable whole new classes of products, Deshpande explained."One emerging technology is hydrogen storage for vehicles powered by hydrogen gas," he said."What these tanks have are adsorbents in them that hydrogen sticks to, so you could store more hydrogen per given unit weight.So nanoporous adsorbents are an enabling technology for some of the really major upcoming things."NanoPore has also developed a novel cooler that sucks out heat by evaporating water from nanoporous adsorbents."You get cooling on demand, seven times the cooling power of ice, with low weight and cost, for shipping drugs around, for instance," Smith said.



This, too, could be very important....


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Jul 05 - 08:23 PM

That's what I said to the proctologist.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 15 Jul 05 - 08:11 PM

The nature of the stool is such that while no leg is necessary, an infinite number of legs are possible. It all depends on how the stool feels at any given time. When the stool is grumpy, we're lucky to get two legs. When it's feeling magnanimous we may get 158^34 legs. Just depends on a lot of factors, some of which even the stool doesn't understand, and the stool is extremely smart. In fact, it is smarter than all MOABites put together with a healthy dish of Stephen Hawking on the side. That's some stool, huh?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 15 Jul 05 - 12:46 PM

one leg of the stool that upholds the Grand Unified Theory of BS

I thought there WAS only one leg on the stool- and the level of BS is what supports the stool. self-support in some ways - stool supported stool


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Jul 05 - 12:41 PM

that rotating through the parameters of one dimension will bring about concomitant relocations of "BS universe" due to the intersection of influences between sets, even though the value of the second, third, fourth, fifth or sixth axis is constant. Thus the number of resultant sets of BS spaces would be on the order of (6^6)^6. This number (possibly the original interpretation of Deuternonmy's number of "the beast") defines available universes in BS space.

This opens the door to the interesting hypothesis that the arch-enemy of authoritarian dogma is BS....or at least, better BS. But that is a subject for another essay.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Jul 05 - 11:39 AM

Thus, some kinds of BS can be very important and somethings given great importance can be complete BS.

Within this statement is the key that unlocks one leg of the stool that upholds the Grand Unified Theory of BS: that BS itself is divided, and, more importantly, it can be expressed mathematically.

Let us call Very Important BS something, perhaps BS' (pronounced "Bee Ess Prime"). Regularily Important BS can be called BS, and the speeches of politicians can be called BS| (pronounced "flushable crap"). It is then immediately obvious that.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Jul 05 - 11:30 AM

The importance index and the "BS" characteristic are independent axes of an at least six dimensional system of semantic evaluation.

Thus, some kinds of BS can be very important and somethings given great importance can be complete BS.

Hope this helps.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 15 Jul 05 - 11:08 AM

A Haw is a type of fruit.

but neither a haw nor a-ha! start with "ha" - so they don't count.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 15 Jul 05 - 11:01 AM

BWL you forgot

A-ha!


Amos said
This may be very important.

Then what is it doing here?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST
Date: 15 Jul 05 - 10:39 AM

HAD - past tense - see also "has"

HAG - Popeye's enemy

HAH! disbelieving eclamative

HAI! - Bruce Lee in attack mode

Haj - religious journey

Hay - something to make while the sun shines.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Jul 05 - 10:17 AM

See also "Has" -- a state of being attributed to those who work with old books. Cf "Wanna".

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 15 Jul 05 - 12:40 AM

Lest anyone confuse any more of the various three-letter words beginning with "ha", please refer to the following:

"Haw!" = Tweed

"Har!" = Ralphs

"Hal!" = Fictional computer

"Han!" = Pilot of Millenium Falcon

"Hat!" = Thing to wear on your head

"Ham!" = Purty good samwich makin's


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Jul 05 - 11:40 PM

July 14, 2005
    
Graphite films only nanometers or billionths of a meter thick could help store hydrogen in an inexpensive, easily manufactured, lightweight and nontoxic manner, an international team of scientists told UPI's Nano World.

"If -- and that's a very large if -- a practical method for preparing the nanostructures can be found, there is a possibility for large-scale, economical production," said researcher John Tse, a materials scientist at the University of Saskatchewan in Saskatoon.

Government and industry leaders are convinced hydrogen will prove a key fuel in the future, with a five-year $1.2 billion U.S. initiative announced in 2003 to develop hydrogen fuel cells and Shell Oil committing $1 billion over five years, according to plans they announced in 2001. This is because hydrogen is the most common element, making up roughly three-quarters of the known universe, while fossil fuels are limited.In addition, the chemical reaction needed for hydrogen cars combines hydrogen with oxygen to produce energy and water, with none of the dirty mix of toxins and global warming gases burning gasoline spews.

"The use of hydrogen as a fuel in which the combustion product is water will help to reduce the emission of greenhouse gases that are detrimental to the environment," Tse said.

The problem of how to store hydrogen remains the Achilles' heel for a hydrogen economy, however.The desired end is a cheap device no heavier and no bulkier than a traditional gasoline tank that provides enough hydrogen to power a vehicle for at least 300 miles before refueling.This is challenging, because storing hydrogen often demands extreme cold, heat or pressure, which requires equipment that is heavy, bulky or expensive.



This may be very important.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Jul 05 - 11:14 PM

A while back it was revealed that khandu and tweed were the same entity. Have they, like spin and charge, become seperated?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: khandu
Date: 14 Jul 05 - 10:54 PM

The preceeding was posted in honor of Tweed.

k


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: khandu
Date: 14 Jul 05 - 10:53 PM

No! No! No!!!
Not "Har!", goddammit!!

"HAW!!"

"HAW!"

k


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 14 Jul 05 - 10:45 PM

Bet those bees got a trifle sea-sick during the day of the storm. You might not want to eat that honey filled with bee barf. :)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 14 Jul 05 - 09:32 PM

Hi, Mom! I'm back from my adventure with my new "friend" Dennis. I don't like Dennis very much. He knocked down more of my trees. Even made one of 'em fall on my house. But it didn't hurt much. At least that's what the house says.

It's been hot workin' out in the hot sun cleanin' up Dennis's mess with no electricity to run air-conditioners. Sure am glad we have a pond to go swimmin' in.

By the way, I left the ceramic birdhouse/beehive hanging in the tree and it did just fine. It didn'r get knocked down or broken and the bees seem quite happy.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Jul 05 - 12:05 PM

You need those well-waxed ceilings, Doctor R, for the rare occasions when you blow your top, I expect.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST
Date: 14 Jul 05 - 09:56 AM

Har!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Jul 05 - 09:54 AM

Sealing ceiling wax without dribbling it on the floor impresses ME.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 14 Jul 05 - 09:48 AM

And ceiling wax* and string (theory)?






*yes. I know. Deliberate.


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