BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 08 Nov 11 - 02:15 PM

As Olde Phartes we are going to end up wanting one plastic phone with large keys and display with nothing else.


A

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Nov 11 - 08:49 AM

Chongo CAME from a pod.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 07 Nov 11 - 11:03 PM

Chongo uses an aPod. He swears by it. And he lives in an aPad.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Nov 11 - 10:57 PM

I wanted something with WiFi, calendaring, address book, and similar stuff that I could put in my shirt pocket. Android is a decent OS and it's open source AND I know how to update it. (I could also overclock the chip, but I won't.)

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Nov 11 - 10:10 PM

You mean an iPad, I presume. Sure they come from --or at least via--Apple--but they work so well. ANd at least you know where your code has been!

Good luck with the Android one.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Nov 11 - 09:16 PM

Well,I just bought an Android Internet tablet (4.3 inch). I hope it lives up to my expectations.

I thought about an iPod, but all the apps have to come from Apple.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Nov 11 - 08:52 PM

The hip need no scansion, but occasional traction.


A

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 07 Nov 11 - 05:49 PM

That doesn't scan very well.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 07 Nov 11 - 04:26 PM

I had my hands in the river
My feet back up on the banks
I looked up to the lord above
And said hey man thanks.

The Tragically Hip

Yeah, I konw... but it's good rock.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Nov 11 - 10:14 AM

You're going to crash Big Mick's iPhone if you start mentioning him over here. If he hits the thread name instead of the ^d it will take years to load the thread to respond. Please, I bed you, don't trash his phone.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Nov 11 - 09:16 AM

I am certain that Big Mick already knows. Big Mick is God.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Nov 11 - 11:27 PM

I watched it. ASTOUNDING! And pretty funny.

There simply is no one else quite like William Shatner.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Nov 11 - 11:15 PM

Please don't tell Mick about that video.

If you do tell Mick, tell him it was Little Hawk's fault.


A

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Nov 11 - 09:53 PM

Just for Little Hawk....

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Nov 11 - 09:29 PM

The Blind Little Boy

O say what is that thing call'd Light,
Which I must ne'er enjoy;
What are the blessings of the sight,
O tell your poor blind boy!

You talk of wondrous things you see,
You say the sun shines bright;
I feel him warm, but how can he
Or make it day or night?

My day or night myself I make
Whene'er I sleep or play;
And could I ever keep awake
With me 'twere always day.

With heavy sighs I often hear
You mourn my hapless woe;
But sure with patience I can bear
A loss I ne'er can know.

Then let not what I cannot have
My cheer of mind destroy:
Whilst thus I sing, I am a king,
Although a poor blind boy.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Nov 11 - 08:40 PM

Don't deign to tell me what my duty is, Amos... ;-)

I expect to be fullsomely entertained by such wits and bon vivants as you and Rapparee....and on a daily basis. Hie thee to the keyboard at once, summon forth thy respective muses, and dazzle me with thy clever verse and tempestuous bombast.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 06 Nov 11 - 06:45 PM

Your duty, sir, is not to be interestingly entertained, but to create interesting entertainment worthy of the Seal of BS Approval from Mom's hand.

MOM's BS Seal of Approval. But from her mouth.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Nov 11 - 04:56 PM

Your duty, sir, is not to be interestingly entertained, but to create interesting entertainment worthy of the Seal of BS Approval from Mom's hand.


A

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Nov 11 - 03:54 PM

Ask Shame. Or "Bad Penny" Rutledge. Or Chongo the Chump.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Nov 11 - 11:46 AM

What brilliant things can I expect from you lads today?

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Nov 11 - 10:52 AM

Aw, g'wan, Rapp!! You just have an obsession about round numbers, is all!! Can't stand a sustained obligato until it resolves, you.

A

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Nov 11 - 09:35 AM

See Mom? I've nurtured you to 42601 now and you can tell that I'm the only one who REALLY cares.

Can I have a dollar?

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Nov 11 - 10:31 PM

Assuming that Shame McBride has not seen the error of his ways, he is a rotten louse-ridden commie pinko fascist Budweiser lover!

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Nov 11 - 10:26 PM

Why would they -- or anyone else -- want him (assuming that he has not actually repented)?

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 05 Nov 11 - 10:10 PM

Unfortunately I am not qualified to deal with incorrigible juvenile delinquency in any case except my own.

Sorry. Maybe the Scientologists would have him?



A

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 05 Nov 11 - 07:44 PM

That too. ;-) Amos, I have an idea...would you be willing to adopt Shane? You have such a good understanding of what makes him tick. I think that under your tutelage he would find a form of security he has never known and go on to great things. Please give it your consideration, but don't make a hasty decision.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Nov 11 - 06:55 PM

Amos is unstrung, did you say?

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 05 Nov 11 - 04:08 PM

Marvelous! ;-D You are an unsung genius, mon frer!

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 05 Nov 11 - 01:58 PM

The word from Wawa far has come
From obese blondes and redheads dumb
No more they'll ride the Kool Aid Train
Conducted by that asshole, Shane.

They will not flirt or wink or smile
When he their souls tries to beguile
They will not cut him any slack
Or offer him their knees or back.

They've had enough, those Wawa women,
Their hearts are full their heads are swimming.
Comparing notes, they've found that he
Is just a punk, a wanna-be.

He has no strength in either arm,
He has no insight, grace, or charm,
His flirting's flat and cheap and shallow
In fetid lust his mind does wallow.

No Wawa girl, with half a brain
Will ever smile again at Shane.
His race is run, his hopes are sick,
They've pegged him for a hopeless prick.

And so--at least until tomorra--
Report the wenches all of Wawa.

Gordon Beefsteak Groscoeur
Poet Laureate of Wawa and Gasoline Pump Expert Extraordinaire

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 05 Nov 11 - 12:50 PM

Ummm...."Shane"? You there?

I can hardly believe you would turn your back on the many cool things you do, like...

1. chugging beer down in record time
2. getting stoned as often as possible
3. seeking idle and meaningless sexual adventures with really dumb local girls
4. petty theft
5. work evasion
6. violation of local ordinances
7. adventures in sloth

Think! These are the bold and manly practices that have made you a legend in your own mind and a guy whose name is a household world as far as Moosenee and Wawa. Don't leave it all behind!

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Charley Noble
Date: 05 Nov 11 - 09:21 AM

With a root-a-toot-toot chorus after a second round of baked beans.

Cheerily,
Charley Noble

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Nov 11 - 08:43 AM

And so it continues....

Today is Roy Rogers' birthday! Build a cow-chip campfire tonight and sing cowboy songs that were written in Hollywood and New York! (You can find REAL cowboy songs in the books "Whorehouse Bells Were Ringing" and "Ten Thousand Goddamn Cattle" but they're not quite in the Roy Rogers image.)

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 05 Nov 11 - 01:39 AM

Wow--a misbehaving mockup, a miscreant mis-creation, a recalcitrant spectre, a contumacious conjuring, a fractious figment!!

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 04 Nov 11 - 11:26 PM

Right.................

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Nov 11 - 10:02 PM

Reform? School?

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River
Date: 04 Nov 11 - 09:48 PM

Good evening, friends (I hope you are my friends).

It's been an exciting time for me. I've completed smoking cessation classes and I'm enrolled in a course of study which will lead to a GED and then, I hope, to college or even university. Considering my history you'll be surprised to find that I find mathematics to be by far the most interesting of the courses.

Oh, I almost forgot: I'm also in Alcoholics Anonymous and I've been "dry" for a month now. I think that I'll continue to post here under my old "name" because you know me by it and it reminds me of the bad old days I never want again to see.

Thank all of you for your support.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Nov 11 - 08:18 PM

The frog said nothing, because he'd just croaked.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 04 Nov 11 - 07:26 PM

noooo... he says, "Pour me some hops."

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 04 Nov 11 - 07:04 PM

LOL!

Not bad, Rap.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Nov 11 - 06:58 PM

"Ribbit."

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 04 Nov 11 - 06:56 PM

Okay, here's another one.

A chimp, a gorilla, and a frog are sitting at a bar.

The chimp says to the bartender, "I'll have a double."

The gorilla sneers and says, "Make mine a triple."

What does the frog say?

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Nov 11 - 06:33 PM

I ain't sending LH out for water, lemme tell ya!

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 04 Nov 11 - 06:26 PM

I got a bunch but this ain't the website for my kinda gutter humour.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 04 Nov 11 - 04:36 PM

Got a new joke here that needs a good punchline:

What is the difference between a pimp and a pump?


"____________________________________________ "


(Come on, guys. Come up with something brilliant. I have faith in you.)

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 04 Nov 11 - 03:27 PM

Soooo... WTF just happened? Is Max pissed or what?

I was PMing him on a proposed change we were discussing and then I got a pic... Press here for cheese... then a pic with paranoia as the title...????

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 04 Nov 11 - 02:24 PM

Max just took down the bookmarks so you can only get here via search. I'll leave well-enough alone. :) MOM's a persistent old broad.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Nov 11 - 02:15 PM

Easier--call up "New MEssages Since Last Visit", and CTRL-F for "Mother".


A

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 04 Nov 11 - 01:18 PM

MOM is in my tracer so I'm testing by adding this post. My theory is that it will stick but the thread won't appear because there is no BS section right now. I suppose we can keep writing as long as we want, we just have to know to come look at the thread in our personal list to see if anyone else has written.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Nov 11 - 01:15 PM

The glass does not fall forever, silly. It pumps up and pumps down depending on barometric pressure. Mariners use this indication of pressure to anticipate wind and weather, which as you may know is closely tied to changes in pressure of air masses due to their differing temperatures. These differences are attributable to planetary motion, differing thermal index values of various surfaces such as sea, land, pavement and so on, and air movements caused by geophysical configurations. In turn, these temperature differences cause air to move up, down and sideways in large and complex patterns.

Louis MacNeice, however, did not know all this, one suspects. Otherwise he never would have said the glass will fall forever.

A

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Nov 11 - 09:07 PM

Our temps ranged from a low in the middle of February of -14 K. to 115 C. in August. It was a rugged year, but us folks out here can take it!