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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Rapparee 27 Jul 18 - 11:04 PM
Stilly River Sage 27 Jul 18 - 10:38 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 26 Jul 18 - 11:41 PM
Little Hawk 26 Jul 18 - 11:13 PM
Little Hawk 26 Jul 18 - 10:58 PM
Rapparee 26 Jul 18 - 09:18 PM
Little Hawk 26 Jul 18 - 01:32 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 26 Jul 18 - 08:41 AM
Donuel 25 Jul 18 - 11:33 PM
Little Hawk 25 Jul 18 - 11:24 PM
Rapparee 25 Jul 18 - 09:57 PM
Little Hawk 25 Jul 18 - 12:48 PM
Donuel 25 Jul 18 - 12:18 PM
Little Hawk 25 Jul 18 - 12:10 PM
Stilly River Sage 25 Jul 18 - 11:54 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 25 Jul 18 - 01:17 AM
Little Hawk 24 Jul 18 - 10:25 PM
Rapparee 24 Jul 18 - 09:38 PM
keberoxu 24 Jul 18 - 08:21 PM
Little Hawk 24 Jul 18 - 10:31 AM
Rapparee 23 Jul 18 - 08:20 PM
Little Hawk 23 Jul 18 - 06:26 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 23 Jul 18 - 05:27 PM
Little Hawk 23 Jul 18 - 03:29 PM
Rapparee 23 Jul 18 - 01:47 PM
Donuel 23 Jul 18 - 10:41 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 23 Jul 18 - 08:10 AM
keberoxu 22 Jul 18 - 11:04 PM
Rapparee 22 Jul 18 - 09:40 PM
Rapparee 22 Jul 18 - 09:34 PM
gnu 22 Jul 18 - 09:07 PM
Donuel 22 Jul 18 - 04:28 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 22 Jul 18 - 12:48 PM
Stilly River Sage 22 Jul 18 - 11:02 AM
Donuel 22 Jul 18 - 10:16 AM
Little Hawk 22 Jul 18 - 10:00 AM
Rapparee 21 Jul 18 - 08:46 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 21 Jul 18 - 11:29 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 20 Jul 18 - 10:53 PM
Little Hawk 20 Jul 18 - 09:50 PM
Rapparee 20 Jul 18 - 08:41 PM
Stilly River Sage 20 Jul 18 - 07:46 PM
Little Hawk 20 Jul 18 - 07:10 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 20 Jul 18 - 04:19 PM
keberoxu 20 Jul 18 - 02:20 PM
Little Hawk 20 Jul 18 - 12:28 PM
Rapparee 19 Jul 18 - 08:42 PM
Rapparee 19 Jul 18 - 08:41 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 19 Jul 18 - 01:31 PM
Rapparee 19 Jul 18 - 12:40 PM

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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Jul 18 - 11:04 PM

Overcast skies here. No rain, just enough overcast to prevent sky gazing.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 27 Jul 18 - 10:38 PM

MOM tried listening to that, BWL, but it was playing in a loop and she couldn't tell when it ended. Spent hours trying to figure it out.

The moon isn't doing anything special for the US, but Mars is supposed to be quite a pip tonight - according to my "Heavens Above" phone app it should just be showing up on the eastern horizon (as soon as it clears the trees across the road from me).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 26 Jul 18 - 11:41 PM

I once listened to the entirety of John Cage's 4'33? (aka 4 Minutes and 33 Seconds of Silence) in only 12 seconds. I would never been able to do it if I hadn't taken that speed listening class.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 26 Jul 18 - 11:13 PM

If you're looking for a refreshing alternative to Netflix and HBO, pick up a pirated copy of "The Worst Years Of Our Lives", an art film about the desperate flight from Ireland and the landing on Newfoundland's rocky shores by the ragged progenitors of Shane McBride, they who escaped the "cleansing of Dangle" in 1849, when the enraged inhabitants of Dangle, Ireland wiped out most of the McBride clan for assorted offenses against their neighbors, and drove the few survivors from Ireland's shores. This film probably would be far better known if not for the fact that Liam Neeson refused his chance to star in it. To quote Neeson, "It's possibly *the* classic example of film making at its absolute worst. I thank providence that I turned down that offer. It would probably have been worse than acting opposite Jar Jar Binks, and might well have killed my career. I'd have had to become a butcher or a greengrocer or something along that line instead."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 26 Jul 18 - 10:58 PM

Ha! Ha! Ha! Why, he could probably have reduced "War and Peace" to well under 500 words.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Jul 18 - 09:18 PM

Bee-Dub has a very short attention span he needs quick action things. Short eclipses, short movies, short climate change, short Ice Ages, quickly moving glaciers. In fact, he has sped up the entire history of the solar system into 97 seconds.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 26 Jul 18 - 01:32 PM

You're willing to stare at your computer for several hours, so why not the Moon? :)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 26 Jul 18 - 08:41 AM

I don't get all the hoopla about this lunar eclipse. It's going to be longer than most. So what? I'm not going to sit and stare at the damned moon for almost two hours. I would prefer that it was a very short eclipse, like the one in 2015 that only lasted five minutes. Then, I could watch the whole event comfortably in one sitting.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 25 Jul 18 - 11:33 PM

A former PM of Great Britain knows how you feel about pig flesh.

Robin Williams said everyone should have a spark of madness, to be able to go full goose bonkers about something they are passionate about. If you ever lose that spark, you're nothin. Well, there are folks here who have honed their wit to a razor sharp rapier and a spark that has become a blow torch and a monkey that has run for president. They have gone from BS enthusiasts to BS artists. From exaggerators to exquisite liars. Others have created new worlds of words woven with care and concern. There are stories that go from the tropics to the artic. Some are true and some cathartic. The changing fibers of this thread have gone from rope to twine of such length no one has read every line.
MOBS has its own life time and should it disappear it is no crime, it will be stored in a basement like some old fine wine or vinegar.
MOM will not step into the same river twice even at the mouth of an ocean bay
With luck she'll sail all night into the morning with new wind in her spiniker.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 Jul 18 - 11:24 PM

The latter can easily be arranged. There's a McDonald's just a couple of miles down the road from here.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Jul 18 - 09:57 PM

I need flesh...human flesh...long pig...dripping with blood...raw...human...flesh. Or a McDonald's hamburger.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 Jul 18 - 12:48 PM

Thank goodness for that!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 25 Jul 18 - 12:18 PM

The massive amounts of hair growth in your ears nose and eyebrows is not werewolf transformation.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 Jul 18 - 12:10 PM

I cannot fathom how combining human and gecko DNA would be of any assistance in identifying "the monster in the basement".

Regarding having sex with bears: It is said to be an amazingly sensual experience...but one that normally only happens once.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 25 Jul 18 - 11:54 AM

I'm reading a murder mystery now, set in a fictional American Museum of Natural History, in which, I think, the authors plan to commingle human and gecko DNA, so they can identify the monster in the basement. One must suspend belief for this kind of story, but it is entertaining enough to get away with it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 25 Jul 18 - 01:17 AM

Berserkers weren't affected by the full moon. The just drank lots of tea made from Amanita Muscaria mushrooms and went batshit crazy.

However, it is important to note that homicidal mania is not necessarily a characteristic of Muscaria intoxication. The berserkers had to be conditioned toward killing. Ordinarily, getting high on Muscaria leads to more convivial activities like attempting to have sex with bears.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 24 Jul 18 - 10:25 PM

You should have one lively time this month, Rap.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Jul 18 - 09:38 PM

That's why my hair is growing so fast and my taste for raw human flesh is increasing! It's my old werewolf/berserker DNA coming out again!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 24 Jul 18 - 08:21 PM

The eclipse this month is said
to be a blood moon,
the longest of the century.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 24 Jul 18 - 10:31 AM

That will never happen in Chicago, Mike, because there ARE no undisturbed sites there! :D

America is the Arsenal, alright. The USA spends more money on weapons than all the other countries combined, and has hundreds of military bases around the world in other countries while the Russians have ONE military base in another country...in Syria. Trump has increased this already enormous American military spending by more than the entire yearly military budget of Russia! Yet the USA has the gall to accuse Russia of being a threat.

The USA openly boasted in the 1990's about twice helping their drunken stooge Boris Yeltsin win the presidency in Russia and more recently about spending billions of dollars to violently overthrow the elected government in Ukraine and replace it with their client government there which includes neo-nazis....yet the USA has the gall to accuse Russia of tampering with the American election in 2016.

Ah, yes, the USA is the Arsenal of something, alright...but it sure as hell is not democracy. It's corporatocracy, which is a new form of fascism. And it's fascist BS, heard daily on your network news.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Jul 18 - 08:20 PM

LH, America is still the Arsenal of Democracy.

As for Chonga, h/she is of no more consequence than a gnat -- annoying but harmless, but easily dealt with if the annoyance becomes too great. This could be anytime now, because as Wrangham has pointed out

We have documented eight attacks in which a wild chimpanzee, or possibly more than one, caused severe bleeding and:or death to children. Attacks were verified by detailed interviews, observation of footprints, and calls...Victims were aged 6–60 months. The chimpanzee(s) attacked infants that were alone or accompanied only by women and children, and ate from all victims that could be carried to an undisturbed site. In three cases, children were eviscerated. Injuries to others included loss of an arm and removal of hands or feet...These injuries are similar to those seen in monkeys preyed on by chimpanzees....

It shan't be long!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 23 Jul 18 - 06:26 PM

Trump is rightly concerned about all those millions of American manufacturing jobs that got moved to China in the last few decades. However, he is not understanding the situation when he blames China for that. It happened because the *American corporations* realized they could manufacture their goods a lot more cheaply in China and Mexico, etc, so THEY moved the jobs there! It is the American corporate sector that exported all those American jobs to low wage countries to enrich themselves, and that is not the fault of China or Mexico or South Korea or anyone else, it was done by the American business community because they *could* do it, and they don't give a damn if millions of American workers lose their full time jobs and their unions and had to work in part time minimum wage jobs in the service industry. In fact, they like it that way. It has enabled them to bust the unions, lower their own costs, and reap bigger profits. Both the Democrats and the Republicans have helped them to do it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 23 Jul 18 - 05:27 PM

Mom!

I have a serious trade deficit with my grocery store! I buy all my food from them, and they don't buy any from me!

To remedy this imbalance, I have decided to place a 25% tariff on all groceries they sell to me. I'll show those jerkwads who they're messing with!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 23 Jul 18 - 03:29 PM

Heh! I kinda suspected that. Chongo says "yer" about as reliable as a 13 dollar bill when it comes to the stories you tell. He has reason to think so, given the dreadful, scandalous, and completely fictional tales you've been spreading about him for well over a decade now. The real puzzle is, are you doing it out of personal spite? Or are you being quietly paid under the table by the Democrats and the Republicans to slander Chongo's name so as to impeded his run for the presidency? Or are you just crazy?

I think it might be all three in combination. Chongo says that "It don't matter to me one way or the other. He will be dealt with in due course of time. Like you deal with a cockroach."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Jul 18 - 01:47 PM

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spotted_dick

There is no such book as I cited. In fact, I kinda made up the whole thing.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 23 Jul 18 - 10:41 AM

Why haven't I seen Rap on the game show Jeopardy. Was he already a three time winner totaling 64,000 dollars?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 23 Jul 18 - 08:10 AM

Happy much belated birthday, Mom! Just fifty years to go and you'll be eligible for Medicare!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 22 Jul 18 - 11:04 PM

A fifteen-year-old MOM.
Words fail me ...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Jul 18 - 09:40 PM

Sorry, I forgot. The foregoing was adapted (and shortened) from Scottish Highwaymen of the Jacobite Era by Alisander McGowan (Edinburgh: University Press, 1937).

By the way, I just noticed that Mom is now slightly over 15 years old. Khandu brought her to our notice on May 3, 2003, at 8:31 p.m. Mudcat Time.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Jul 18 - 09:34 PM

"Spotted Dick" was originally known as Richard Muirehead-Bruce, a Scots "laird" of the early 18th Century. He rode with the Jacobites under Charles Stuart in 1744 and fled the Battle of Culloden in April, 1745 when the English forces managed to flank the Scots and attack from the rear. While not sharing the "bonny boat" that carried Charles to Skye and eventual safety on the Continent, Richard's boat overturned and he sa managed to swim back to the mainland. He became a highwayman, notorious in the Lowlands and around Glasgow and even as far as Stirling. His nickname of "Spotted Dick" came from gunpowder marks on his face cause when a fusil he was firing at Culloden exploded. He was captured by the British in March, 1748 and executed at the Tollbooth in Edinburgh in early 1749.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 22 Jul 18 - 09:07 PM

Seriously? I finally check in after having a terrible run of bad luck and I read that LH likes sheep guts? And BWL has spots on his dick? I didn't read back any further. Well, I did a bit and then... "Bull semen is going for about USD $40.00 per straw"... well I wasn't going to read any more of THAT filthy porno.

So, I'll check back again soon as I have time. Things are kinda *busy* here.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 22 Jul 18 - 04:28 PM

All puns aside my favorite culinary utensil is the simple but ancient clay pot.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 22 Jul 18 - 12:48 PM

Rap, my current research is limited to culinary concerns. If you are looking for research on Spotted Dick, please refer to any of several journals on urinary or reproductive medicine.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 22 Jul 18 - 11:02 AM

My mother gave me a little cast iron pot with a bail handle and a well-fitted lid, and I haven't had many uses for it, but yesterday I realized it was perfect for cooking a single portion of fried okra. The small pan means I don't need much oil and cook a few at a time. Bag some Louisiana fish fry and flour, drop a few in to coat them, then drop them in the oil. Mmmmm! This isn't a recipe for the hot pavement. (The okra came out of the garden a few minutes before I cooked them. This isn't BS but it's worth sharing.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 22 Jul 18 - 10:16 AM

Actually I ate 'yesterday' too. Not bad


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 22 Jul 18 - 10:00 AM

I ate haggis yesterday. Not bad, actually.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Jul 18 - 08:46 PM

Then you can research Toad In The Hole. And Spotted Dick.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 21 Jul 18 - 11:29 AM

Well,Mom, I had sausage as part of this morning's breakfast, but it was in the form of patties, not links. Therefore, I can categorically state that they were not bangers, since all evidence seems to point toward bangers being link sausages. I shall attempt to procure some link sausages in the near future to continue my research into the dodgy subject of whether or not it's possible for a US sausage to be a banger.

You may rest assured that I will cook the link sausages in a cast iron skillet so as not to skew the research by having the skillet be aluminum instead of aluminium.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 20 Jul 18 - 10:53 PM

High quality bull semen may be $40.00 a straw, but Mom quality bull shit is priceless.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 20 Jul 18 - 09:50 PM

Fascinating.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Jul 18 - 08:41 PM

You can eat a pavement-fried egg. I wouldn't but you can.

English (Irish, French, etc.) bacon is called "back bacon" and is leaner than US or "streaky" bacon. US bacon comes from the belly of the pig, or "sowbelly" or "porkbelly" and so now you know what they mean by that when you listen tot he commodities report.

You DO listen to the farm report, don't you? Everyone I know does. In fact, you can't get a cup of coffee without discussing farrows and gilts and the price of barley and what they're paying per hundredweight for cattle. Bull semen is going for about USD $40.00 per straw (.25 to .5 milliliters, extended for insemination). The price varies with the sire and breeding record of the bull in question, of course.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 20 Jul 18 - 07:46 PM

I'm not sure how much a rasher of bacon is, but I know if I left an iron skillet out in the sun in this heat wave I could cook the whole thing in relatively little time. Heck with cooking an egg on the pavement, if I'm going to cook food in the hot weather I'll do it in a way that it's consumable afterward.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 20 Jul 18 - 07:10 PM

That means that for Chongo a "rasher" is probably equivalent to as much as 25% of the entire body mass of the pig, accompanied by a 40 ounce bottle of Scotch Whiskey.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 20 Jul 18 - 04:19 PM

Well, if there's to be no agreement on how big a slice of bacon is, then saying that a rasher is "one slice" or "a few slices" is meaningless. So, it would seem to mean something more like "a serving", with the caveat that your rasher/serving may be my little taste.

To borrow from Crocodile Dundee, "That's not a rasher. THIS is a rasher!"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 20 Jul 18 - 02:20 PM

Rasher of bacon:
I think there may be a tricky distinction in play here.
Aggravated by the differences between
the U.K. and the U. S.
(although I'm entirely fuzzy about bacon in Canada).

The U.K. people wax positively indignant
over the way bacon is served in the U. S.,
because the U. K. consumers expect a greater quantity,
and in the U. S. they get a lesser quantity.

"One Piece of Bacon" in the U. K. is probably
a moderate sized HUNK of pork, which
could be,
and in the U. S. is, carved into numerous thinner slices.

Actor Robert Carlyle rarely appears on late-night talk shows.
But there's a YouTube file for his brief appearance on,
who was that host, he was a fellow Scot and he's off the air now.

And the two of them went at it about bacon versus bacon,
which was kind of frivolous.
But Carlyle was one of the consumers who was shocked by
how little there was in a U. S. sized- individual serving of bacon.
He said he wanted it done like it is done in Ayrshire,
they know how to do bacon there ...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 20 Jul 18 - 12:28 PM

I think a rasher is supposed to be just one piece of bacon.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Jul 18 - 08:42 PM

No, wait. That wasn't it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Jul 18 - 08:41 PM

I thought a rasher was someone who had a rash and gave it to someone else, called the "rashee."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 19 Jul 18 - 01:31 PM

I did not have grits for breakfast this morning, but I did have bacon. I'm not sure if the amount of bacon I had qualifies as a rasher. Is "rasher" a specific or non-specific amount? Does it mean "three or four slices" or something more like "a shitload"? Is it even possible to have a rasher of bacon in the US, or does the bacon have to be in the British Isles to qualify? If there's a Brit-themed restaurant next door to a Waffle House, can they sell rashers while the Waffle House can only sell slices?

Tomorrow morning, I plan on having sausage. I'm sure I shall enlist your aid in determining whether or not they qualify as bangers.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Jul 18 - 12:40 PM

I have no feud with anyone, unilateral or otherwise. Pat is at the Quilter's Hall of Fame at the moment to see a friend inducted.


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