Lyrics & Knowledge Personal Pages Record Shop Auction Links Radio & Media Kids Membership Help
The Mudcat Cafemuddy

Post to this Thread - Printer Friendly - Home
Page: [1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10] [11] [12] [13] [14] [15] [16] [17] [18] [19] [20] [21] [22] [23] [24] [25] [26] [27] [28] [29] [30] [31] [32] [33] [34] [35] [36] [37] [38] [39] [40] [41] [42] [43] [44] [45] [46] [47] [48] [49] [50] [51] [52] [53] [54] [55] [56] [57] [58] [59] [60] [61] [62] [63] [64] [65] [66] [67] [68] [69] [70] [71] [72] [73] [74] [75] [76] [77] [78] [79] [80] [81] [82] [83] [84] [85] [86] [87] [88] [89] [90] [91] [92] [93] [94] [95] [96] [97] [98] [99] [100] [101] [102] [103] [104] [105] [106] [107] [108] [109] [110] [111] [112] [113] [114] [115] [116] [117] [118] [119] [120] [121] [122] [123] [124] [125] [126] [127] [128] [129] [130] [131] [132] [133] [134] [135] [136] [137] [138] [139] [140] [141] [142] [143] [144] [145] [146] [147] [148] [149] [150] [151] [152] [153] [154] [155] [156] [157] [158] [159] [160] [161] [162] [163] [164] [165] [166] [167] [168] [169] [170] [171] [172] [173] [174] [175] [176] [177] [178] [179] [180] [181] [182] [183] [184] [185] [186] [187] [188] [189] [190] [191] [192] [193] [194] [195] [196] [197] [198] [199] [200] [201] [202] [203] [204] [205] [206] [207] [208] [209] [210] [211] [212] [213] [214] [215] [216] [217] [218] [219] [220] [221] [222] [223] [224] [225] [226] [227] [228] [229] [230] [231] [232] [233] [234] [235] [236] [237] [238] [239] [240] [241] [242] [243] [244] [245] [246] [247] [248] [249] [250] [251] [252] [253] [254] [255] [256] [257] [258] [259] [260] [261] [262] [263] [264] [265] [266] [267] [268] [269] [270] [271] [272] [273] [274] [275] [276] [277] [278] [279] [280] [281] [282] [283] [284] [285] [286] [287] [288] [289] [290] [291] [292] [293] [294] [295] [296] [297] [298] [299] [300] [301] [302] [303] [304] [305] [306] [307] [308] [309] [310] [311] [312] [313] [314] [315] [316] [317] [318] [319] [320] [321] [322] [323] [324] [325] [326] [327] [328] [329] [330] [331] [332] [333] [334] [335] [336] [337] [338] [339] [340] [341] [342] [343] [344] [345] [346] [347] [348] [349] [350] [351] [352] [353] [354] [355] [356] [357] [358] [359] [360] [361] [362] [363] [364] [365] [366] [367] [368] [369] [370] [371] [372] [373] [374] [375] [376] [377] [378] [379] [380] [381] [382] [383] [384] [385] [386] [387] [388] [389] [390] [391] [392] [393] [394] [395] [396] [397] [398] [399] [400] [401] [402] [403] [404] [405] [406] [407] [408] [409] [410] [411] [412] [413] [414] [415] [416] [417] [418] [419] [420] [421] [422] [423] [424] [425] [426] [427] [428] [429] [430] [431] [432] [433] [434] [435] [436] [437] [438] [439] [440] [441] [442] [443] [444] [445] [446] [447] [448] [449] [450] [451] [452] [453] [454] [455] [456] [457] [458] [459] [460] [461] [462] [463] [464] [465] [466] [467] [468] [469] [470] [471] [472] [473] [474] [475] [476] [477] [478] [479] [480] [481] [482] [483] [484] [485] [486] [487] [488] [489] [490] [491] [492] [493] [494] [495] [496] [497] [498] [499] [500] [501] [502] [503] [504] [505] [506] [507] [508] [509] [510] [511] [512] [513] [514] [515] [516] [517] [518] [519] [520] [521] [522] [523] [524] [525] [526] [527] [528] [529] [530] [531] [532] [533] [534] [535] [536] [537] [538] [539] [540] [541] [542] [543] [544] [545] [546] [547] [548] [549] [550] [551] [552] [553] [554] [555] [556] [557] [558] [559] [560] [561] [562] [563] [564] [565] [566] [567] [568] [569] [570] [571] [572] [573] [574] [575] [576] [577] [578] [579] [580] [581] [582] [583] [584] [585] [586] [587] [588] [589] [590] [591] [592] [593] [594] [595] [596] [597] [598] [599] [600] [601] [602] [603] [604] [605] [606] [607] [608] [609] [610] [611] [612] [613] [614] [615] [616] [617] [618] [619] [620] [621] [622] [623] [624] [625] [626] [627] [628] [629] [630] [631] [632] [633] [634] [635] [636] [637] [638] [639] [640] [641] [642] [643] [644] [645] [646] [647] [648] [649] [650] [651] [652] [653] [654] [655] [656] [657] [658] [659] [660] [661] [662] [663] [664] [665] [666] [667] [668] [669] [670] [671] [672] [673] [674] [675] [676] [677] [678] [679] [680] [681] [682] [683] [684] [685] [686] [687] [688] [689] [690] [691] [692] [693] [694] [695] [696] [697] [698] [699] [700] [701] [702] [703] [704] [705] [706] [707] [708] [709] [710] [711] [712] [713] [714] [715] [716] [717] [718] [719] [720] [721] [722] [723] [724] [725] [726] [727] [728] [729] [730] [731] [732] [733] [734] [735] [736] [737] [738] [739] [740] [741] [742] [743] [744] [745] [746] [747] [748] [749] [750] [751] [752] [753] [754] [755] [756] [757] [758] [759] [760] [761] [762] [763] [764] [765] [766] [767] [768] [769] [770] [771] [772] [773] [774] [775] [776] [777] [778] [779] [780] [781] [782] [783] [784] [785] [786] [787] [788] [789] [790] [791] [792] [793] [794] [795] [796] [797] [798] [799] [800] [801] [802] [803] [804] [805] [806] [807] [808] [809] [810] [811] [812] [813] [814] [815] [816] [817] [818] [819] [820] [821] [822] [823] [824] [825] [826] [827] [828] [829] [830] [831] [832] [833] [834] [835] [836] [837] [838] [839] [840] [841] [842] [843] [844] [845] [846] [847] [848] [849] [850] [851] [852] [853] [854] [855] [856] [857] [858] [859] [860] [861] [862] [863] [864] [865] [866] [867] [868] [869] [870] [871] [872] [873] [874] [875] [876] [877] [878] [879] [880] [881] [882] [883] [884] [885] [886] [887] [888] [889] [890] [891] [892] [893] [894] [895] [896] [897] [898] [899] [900] [901] [902] [903] [904] [905] [906] [907] [908] [909] [910] [911] [912] [913] [914] [915] [916] [917] [918] [919] [920] [921] [922] [923] [924] [925] [926] [927] [928] [929] [930] [931] [932] [933] [934] [935] [936] [937] [938] [939] [940] [941] [942] [943] [944] [945] [946] [947] [948] [949] [950] [951] [952] [953] [954] [955] [956] [957] [958] [959] [960] [961] [962] [963] [964] [965] [966] [967] [968] [969] [970] [971] [972] [973] [974] [975] [976] [977] [978] [979] [980] [981] [982] [983] [984] [985] [986] [987] [988] [989] [990] [991] [992] [993] [994] [995] [996] [997] [998] [999] [1000] [1001] [1002] [1003] [1004] [1005] [1006] [1007] [1008] [1009] [1010] [1011] [1012] [1013] [1014] [1015] [1016] [1017] [1018] [1019] [1020] [1021] [1022] [1023] [1024] [1025] [1026] [1027] [1028] [1029] [1030] [1031] [1032] [1033] [1034] [1035] [1036] [1037] [1038] [1039] [1040] [1041] [1042] [1043] [1044] [1045] [1046] [1047] [1048] [1049] [1050] [1051] [1052] [1053] [1054] [1055] [1056] [1057] [1058] [1059] [1060] [1061] [1062] [1063] [1064] [1065] [1066] [1067] [1068] [1069] [1070] [1071] [1072] [1073] [1074] [1075] [1076] [1077] [1078] [1079] [1080] [1081] [1082] [1083] [1084] [1085] [1086] [1087] [1088] [1089] [1090] [1091] [1092] [1093] [1094] [1095] [1096] [1097] [1098] [1099] [1100] [1101] [1102] [1103] [1104] [1105] [1106] [1107] [1108] [1109] [1110] [1111] [1112] [1113] [1114] [1115] [1116] [1117] [1118] [1119] [1120] [1121] [1122] [1123] [1124] [1125] [1126] [1127] [1128] [1129] [1130] [1131] [1132] [1133] [1134] [1135] [1136] [1137]


BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Amos 12 Apr 07 - 12:53 AM
Rapparee 11 Apr 07 - 11:05 PM
Amos 11 Apr 07 - 08:42 PM
Acme 11 Apr 07 - 08:37 PM
Amos 11 Apr 07 - 06:34 PM
MMario 11 Apr 07 - 04:18 PM
Amos 11 Apr 07 - 04:15 PM
Rapparee 11 Apr 07 - 03:23 PM
MMario 11 Apr 07 - 03:22 PM
Amos 11 Apr 07 - 03:15 PM
MMario 11 Apr 07 - 03:15 PM
Amos 11 Apr 07 - 03:13 PM
MMario 11 Apr 07 - 03:02 PM
Amos 11 Apr 07 - 02:59 PM
MMario 11 Apr 07 - 01:34 PM
Amos 11 Apr 07 - 01:29 PM
Rapparee 11 Apr 07 - 01:24 PM
Amos 11 Apr 07 - 01:01 PM
Acme 11 Apr 07 - 12:55 PM
Amos 11 Apr 07 - 10:13 AM
MMario 11 Apr 07 - 09:30 AM
Rapparee 11 Apr 07 - 09:21 AM
Amos 11 Apr 07 - 09:17 AM
Rapparee 11 Apr 07 - 09:06 AM
Acme 11 Apr 07 - 12:05 AM
Amos 10 Apr 07 - 10:11 PM
Rapparee 10 Apr 07 - 10:00 PM
Amos 10 Apr 07 - 03:08 PM
Rapparee 10 Apr 07 - 11:48 AM
Amos 10 Apr 07 - 10:55 AM
MMario 10 Apr 07 - 10:24 AM
Acme 10 Apr 07 - 10:20 AM
Amos 10 Apr 07 - 10:10 AM
Rapparee 10 Apr 07 - 09:15 AM
Amos 10 Apr 07 - 03:26 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 10 Apr 07 - 12:47 AM
Amos 10 Apr 07 - 12:28 AM
Amos 10 Apr 07 - 12:25 AM
Amos 10 Apr 07 - 12:24 AM
Amos 10 Apr 07 - 12:23 AM
Amos 10 Apr 07 - 12:22 AM
Amos 10 Apr 07 - 12:20 AM
Amos 10 Apr 07 - 12:18 AM
Amos 10 Apr 07 - 12:17 AM
Amos 10 Apr 07 - 12:16 AM
Amos 10 Apr 07 - 12:15 AM
Amos 10 Apr 07 - 12:14 AM
Acme 09 Apr 07 - 11:38 PM
Amos 09 Apr 07 - 11:21 PM
Rapparee 09 Apr 07 - 10:25 PM
Lyrics & Knowledge Search [Advanced]
DT  Forum
Sort (Forum) by:relevance date
DT Lyrics:



Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Apr 07 - 12:53 AM

The First Vowel has no need of having his "S" saved, sirrah! ;>)


A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Apr 07 - 11:05 PM

You think that will save your S???


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Apr 07 - 08:42 PM

Well, I had made a promise, and singing it "S" was like crossing my fingers, in case I forget...er...something like that.


A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 11 Apr 07 - 08:37 PM

S ?

You missed. One letter for the whole, and you missed it.

Are your hands shaking still from that last performance?


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Apr 07 - 06:34 PM

Why, MM! Younever said!!! :D I'll put one in next time.


S


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 11 Apr 07 - 04:18 PM

Why no attribution, though? Those are frequently my favorite part.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Apr 07 - 04:15 PM

Oh, boy-os, I feel SO much better I just can't tell youse.

A.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Apr 07 - 03:23 PM

BRAVISSIMO!!


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 11 Apr 07 - 03:22 PM

Ha! Obviously I can do less! (Maybe I should apply to LFPS; but applying myself would probably disqualify me - anyone want to apply for me?)


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Apr 07 - 03:15 PM

The least you could do, if you insist on calling Spaw the least of us, is include my grammatically correct rejoinder, which I forget what was.


A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 11 Apr 07 - 03:15 PM


BRAVO!


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Apr 07 - 03:13 PM

In August of this year. The Hadron collider http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Large_Hadron_Collider
will be switched on and power proton particle streams at such velocities that their mass will exceed that of a couple city buses and create a collision that may open new doors to an understanding of particle physics, dimensions, black holes, dark matter and the search for the elusive Higgs boson.


I've been aloft in gale and breeze,
All across the Southern Ocean,
But a defter dodger ne'er I seed
Than Higgs, the absent Bosun.
He'd sign the sheet, before we sailed,
And promise work a-plenty,
But searching for him down below,
The bosun's bunk was empty.
He warn't on deck, nor up aloft,
Nor in the locker round,
He wasn't curled up by the gun.
He was nowhere to be found!

One night off the Newfoundland shoals
All hands were called for watches,
The fog had grown as thick as mud
Which before had just been patches.
The chaplain was even sent aloft,
From the stabbd yard to dandle,
Thinking from there, he'd be more apt
Some miracle to handle.

But no-one took the topmast perch,
As we cruised the fog-blind ocean.
That weas the station, at such times,
Reserved for the old ship's bosun.
We mighta had a chance that night,
Through pea-soup fog a-gliding
But no-one saw the Hadron's lights
Before we were colliding.

Our ship was never built for such,
A trader, not a fighter,
And most of the hands went down with her,
That poor Hadron collider.
I lost a lot of friends of mine,
In the freezing, midnight ocean;
And I curse until the end of time,
"Goddamn that Higgs, the bosun!!"


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 11 Apr 07 - 03:02 PM

Hey MOM!

Just so you know that at least on of your kids is out inspiring others:

this little exchange really needs to be archived for posterity:

From: Amos
Date: 11 Apr 07 - 01:37 PM

I have seen some Greeks bare, but their gifts were all above the equator.

A

------------------------------------------------------------------
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 11 Apr 07 - 02:05 PM

Athena Greek goddeth oneth, Amoth
--------------------------------------------------------------------
From: John 'Giok' MacKenzie
Date: 11 Apr 07 - 02:18 PM

Amos Amoth amat?
-------------------------------------------------------------------
From: catspaw49
Date: 11 Apr 07 - 02:55 PM

Amos Amoth amat

Uh.....I came, I saw Amos nekkid, I tossed lunch?

Spaw


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Apr 07 - 02:59 PM

About all of whom, for reasons never made public knowledge, E.E. Smith denied all cognizance.


A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 11 Apr 07 - 01:34 PM

Don't forget those classic tales

The Tin woodsmen of the Lens
The Cowardly lion of the Lens
The Scarecrow of the Lens
The emerald City of the Lens
The gnome King of the Lens
The Hungry Tiger of the Lens

Frank Baum was really very derivitive - he even changed his name to Lens Frank Baum; but usually abbreviated it.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Apr 07 - 01:29 PM

About all of whom, for reasons never made public knowledge, E.E. Smith denied all cognizance.


A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Apr 07 - 01:24 PM

Yeah, there are a whole bunch of us. Uncles of the Lens, Great-Aunts Twiced Removed On Uncle Worsel's Side of the Lens, Natural Children of the Lens, Unnatural Children of the Lens, Orphans of the Lens, Adopted Children of the Lens, Foster Children of the Lens, Best Friends of Sisters of the Lens' Best Friend's Boy Friend's Neighbor of the Lens...just lots of us.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Apr 07 - 01:01 PM

The Lensman Series, a series of fantastic futuristic sci-fi by a chap named E.E. "Doc" Smith, written about 50 years ago and a major artifact of the Golden Era of Sci Fi.


A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 11 Apr 07 - 12:55 PM

Grandchildren of the Lens?

I don't have a clue as to what that is.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Apr 07 - 10:13 AM

Yeah, I have one of those bracelets, too, packed away with my leisure suits from the 70's somewhere in a box. It probably needs a new battery by now.


A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 11 Apr 07 - 09:30 AM

So, what was Worsel really like? and Nadreck?


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Apr 07 - 09:21 AM

Did I ever mention that I'm one of the Grandchildren of the Lens?


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Apr 07 - 09:17 AM

Sorry, man, but I think you need to move to South Dakota and take Dakoting lessons.


A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Apr 07 - 09:06 AM

His code name is "Sam The Eagle" because Amos is soooooooo right-wing.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 11 Apr 07 - 12:05 AM

tsk tsk

He's just stringing you along, Amos.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Apr 07 - 10:11 PM

Yeah, I still get a grin out of that one. And you type it so well, too.


A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Apr 07 - 10:00 PM

I wooden know.

Didja hear about the time Jesus was out walking around Heaven incognito, and he wandered into a small, obscure section of the Heavenly City. Down a quaint alley he heard hammering and sawing and, having spent part of his life as a carpenter, he was interested and walked down to the door of a small shop.

There inside was an old, bearded man, his gnarled hands using a plane to smooth a board. Jesus said, "That's nice work, old man."

And the old man replied, "Yes, I enjoy it even here. I only wish that my son was here to work with me. He was a very special person, though...he wasn't human. And I haven't seen him in many, many years."

And a light dawned in Jesus's mind, and he said, choking back tears, he exclaimed, "FATHER!"

And the old man looked back and said, "Pinnochio?"


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Apr 07 - 03:08 PM

I suspect most occasions when you find things to be wooden, it is pretty derivative and forced, old friend. Just, you know, a suspicion...


A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Apr 07 - 11:48 AM

I found the cat's piano playing to be wooden, forced, and derivative. Much like my own.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Apr 07 - 10:55 AM

I think I liked the student Mozart rendition in that YouTube better, musically. The cat would be more persuasive if she didn't keep looking around for an escape path. :)


A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 10 Apr 07 - 10:24 AM

If you'll pardon the digression into muysic releated tales - over the weekend I found about 20 verses to Ton O' Bedlam-- so I'm gonna mix and match and pick and choose and come up with my "own" version.

Gotta an invite to sing at an open mike at the church saturday - and have a gig at the Hudson Valley MayFaire first week of May. So it's timely.

Now back to your irregularly scheduled BS.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 10 Apr 07 - 10:20 AM

Thanks, Amos, we knew you could do it!

To show my gratitude, I'll let this little girl serenade you for a while.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Apr 07 - 10:10 AM

What, Mom? Yeah, I got first aid and my bruises are all treated. The splinters were pulled and the burns have been bandaged. Yeah, I'm fine, thanks for asking. And I got some sleep. Yeah, I knw we got past 17 Grand thanks to all that doggerel. Glad I could help, sweet of you to say so. No, I haven't gotten cards or letters. Rapaireposted another boat song. I'm glad you liked the rhymes. You know I allus will do what I can do. No, actually, no-one else has said anything, but that doesn't mean....Mom!! Not the bamboo rod!! They don't deserve that! They wus busy!! Please, cool off, wouldja? Here, let me get you as martini...


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Apr 07 - 09:15 AM

THE MARY L. McKAY

Frederick W. Wallace

From Portland, Maine, to Yarmouth Sound
Two-twenty miles we ran
In eighteen hours, my bully boys,
Now beat that if you can.
The crew said it was seamanship;
The skipper, he kept dumb.
But the force that drove our vessel
Was the power of Portland rum.

Come all ye hardy haddockers
Who winter fishin' go.
And brave the seas upon the banks
In stormy wind and snow
And ye who love hard driving
Come listen to my lay
Of the run we made from Portland
On the Mary L. McKay.

We hung the muslin on her
As the wind began to hum.
Twenty hardy Nova Scotia men
Chock full of Portland rum.
Mainsail, fores'l, jib and jumbo
On that wild December day
As we passed ole Cape Elizabeth
And slugged for Fundy Bay.

        Storm along, drive along
        Punch her through the rips.
        Northeast gale's a blowin',
        And we'll take all that she gives.
        We're homeward bound to Yarmouth Sound
        Two-twenty miles today
        We made the run on Portland rum
        On the Mary L. McKay.

We slammed her by Monhegan
As the gale began to scream.
Our vessel took to dancing
In a way that was no dream.
A howler o'er the taffrail,
As we steered sou'east away
For she was a hound for running
Was the Mary L. McKay.

We slammed her to Matinicus.
The skipper hauled the log
"Sixteen knots! Lord Harry!
Ain't she just the gal to jog?"
The half-canned wheelsman shouted
As he swung her on her way
"Just watch me tear the mainsail off
The Mary L. McKay."

        Chorus

The rum was passing merrily
And the crew was feeling grand
Longnecks dancing in our wake
From where we left the land.
Our skipper he kept sober
For he knew how things could lay,
And he made us furl the mains'l
On the Mary L. McKay.

Now the captain didn't care to make
His wife a widow yet.
He swung her off to Yarmouth Cape
With just her fores'l set
Past Fourchu in the mornin'
And shut in at break of day
And soon in shelterin' harbor
Lay the Mary L. McKay.

        Chorus

From Portland, Maine, to Yarmouth Sound
Two-twenty miles we ran.
In eighteen hours, my bully boys,
Now beat that if you can.
The crew said it was seamanship;
The skipper he kept dumb.
But the force that drove our vessel
Was the power of Portland rum.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Apr 07 - 03:26 AM

It appears there has been a small dedicated clump of inventors making successful water-powered internal combustion cars.

I say let's build us some of these.


A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 10 Apr 07 - 12:47 AM

When Mom was seventeen,
it was a very good year....

(I'd add some little musical notes, but I lost the code for them when my computer crashed a few weeks ago and I'm too lazy to find them again.)


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Apr 07 - 12:28 AM

Now somewhere MOABites explain,
Why they had to yield the ghost,
An' why they could not make the push
To that seventeen-thousandth post.
But them excuses don't count for much,
They're jes' music for the birds,
Cuz' no-one ever accused Big A
Of running out of words.

Joseph Morgan Homer, Poet Laureate, Order of the Voewels
Hymns of the Great Thread
Feinbottom Puffery and Wynde
Moab, Utah, 2007


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Apr 07 - 12:25 AM

Well the wind came down, and the sun came out,
There was cheer across the land.
As Amos carried Mom and all,
Past the Seventeen of Grand.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Apr 07 - 12:24 AM

Khandu was nowhere to be seen,
An' Tweed had jumped the line.
But ole Amos said, "Doncha worry none"
"Here's Sixteen-nine-nine-nine."


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Apr 07 - 12:23 AM

As the storm tore off the roof above,
And the hour was growing late,
Ole Amos lit a stogie up,
On the sixteen-nine-nine-eight.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Apr 07 - 12:22 AM

At sixteen-nine-nine seven
LH pulled out for the woods.
And Bunn, well he was lying low,
An' BL was jes' no good.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Apr 07 - 12:20 AM

There was no-one feeling cheerful,
Pore Still was feeling sick.
But ole Amos kept on typing on,
Through sixteen-nine-nine-six


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Apr 07 - 12:18 AM

By sixteen-nine and ninety five
The wind'd begun to shriek
Rapaire'd gone after golf balls,
Thet were filling up the creek.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Apr 07 - 12:17 AM

The sky was all afire,
And the hail broke down the door.
But someone was still posting,
We hit sixteen-nine-nine-four.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Apr 07 - 12:16 AM

At sixteen nine and ninety three,
The lightning tore through the halls,
And noone knew who'd pull as through,
Or if anyone had the balls.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Apr 07 - 12:15 AM

By sixteen nine and ninety-two
The sky had turned to blood.
There was hail as big as softballs
Slamming into a sea of mud.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Apr 07 - 12:14 AM

We was sixteen nine and ninety,
When the winds began to blow,
And one by one all of MOAB's kids
Had somewhere else to go.
...


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Apr 07 - 11:38 PM

Amos, it's up to you, fella, and maybe Rap, if he isn't out hunting golf balls in the snow by flashlight. I'm headed to bed soon. 10 to go to another of mom's many small hurdles. We're counting on you, kid!


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 09 Apr 07 - 11:21 PM

I like that Rapaire always has something from some obscure source to throw on the table, like a road-killed Armadillo in a Texas cathouse. :D


A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Apr 07 - 10:25 PM

SCUTTLEBUTT
Chuck Romanoff

See the burly longshoreman, showing off his biceps,
Heavin' and a'haulin' mighty freighters in and out.
All of the townfolk think he's quite a guy, 'cept
He don't lift a finger to help around the house.

Scuttlebutt! Ain't it a shame?
Nobody knows. Nobody's to blame.
The truth ain't pretty. I think you'll agree. Just
Don't ya tell nobody that you heard it from me.

Do you see the dandy yachtsman, posing at the wheel,
The picture of a regular marina buccaneer?
But he doesn't know his rudder from his keel.
It's a jolly good job he doesn't ever leave the pier.

Yonder is a fisherman, wading in a brook
On a weekend with the fellas, feelin' wild and free--
But the bold desperado's afraid to bait the hook
He says "Will one of you people please do this for me?"

Listen to the folk singer, feelin' kinda jaunty,
Singin' out the chorus of a ballad sublime.
He's a three-chord-wonder, thinks he's Belafonte
You know he's gonna bore us with "one more time."

Over and over, day after day
Comin' and a'goin' like ever before,
Gossip is so ugly, try as you may
It comes innuendo and out of your door.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate
Next Page

 


You must be a member to post in non-music threads. Join here.


You must be a member to post in non-music threads. Join here.



Mudcat time: 15 December 10:54 AM EST

[ Home ]

All original material is copyright © 1998 by the Mudcat Café Music Foundation, Inc. All photos, music, images, etc. are copyright © by their rightful owners. Every effort is taken to attribute appropriate copyright to images, content, music, etc. We are not a copyright resource.