BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 20 May 04 - 08:50 AM

Bwah! Hah! Hah! Shatner snagged post 3200!

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 May 04 - 09:10 AM

I knew what you were up to, LH, and I deliberately let you get away with it. Now send me the money you promised.

As for Khandu, it's just another example of Leadership Failure. Of maternal desertion. Some are loyel, and then there are Others.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 20 May 04 - 09:14 AM

Coises! We haz been Shat upon again!

Yes, I also bore witness to the knightships King khandu is passing out like Moonpies at a Mardi Gras parade over at Tweedsburg. But what can you expect. The boy is obviously brain-damaged as a result of his long incarceration at the hands of vile rebels, revolutionaries and terrorists in Toledo, Ohio, no less! And we have only ourselves to blame since none of us lifted a finger to help him. But, look, is it reasonable to think I should get in my truck and drive to friggin' Ohio, of all places, and search through every vacant warehouse and shotgun shack to find khandu? Hell no!Fuck 'im! I like the boy and all that shit but he really ain't worth it!

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 20 May 04 - 09:15 AM

Oh, big deal.

Shatner is A Ass.

A

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 May 04 - 09:23 AM

Ya know, Bee-Dubya, that's pretty much what the Idaho Legion said. Sagebrush Sore(he's called that ever since he did what he hadda do and grabbed a handful of sagebrush instead of using the Sears catalog pages) said to me jist t'other day, "Mebbe we shoulda went off and reskeyed that Khandu guy, but I shore din't fancy ridin' through Shekago er Dee-troit, so I'm right glad we got drunk insted. He's a good guy, but I ain't sure he's Top Hand enuff ta warrant ridin' down that there Outer Drive fer. And there ain't very much in the whole danged wurld worth ridin' on the Boreman fer!"

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: 42
Date: 20 May 04 - 05:42 PM

that would be "an" ass.

ahhhh the trouble with Triffids
j

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 20 May 04 - 05:59 PM

Ohmigod!!!! I made the mistake of trying to open this thread by clicking on the thread name instead of on the "D" or the number. My computer started screaming at me. "You want me to load what? That damned thread's longer than all but one of Stephen King's novels! I may be a reasonably new computer, but you still live in the country where dialup is the only kind of Internet connection you can get. Maybe you have all day to wait, but I've got better things to do. I swear, if you make me try to load it I'll lock up! I promise it!"

Pretty darned amazing, especially since I haven't had the speakers turned on for weeks.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 20 May 04 - 06:06 PM

I have found THIS THREAD to be so utterly MOABworthy that I am compelled to place this link to it here on the MOAB. It is the funniest thing I have seen on the 'Cat since Bubba Bubba and Debbie Earl tried to eat khandu and puked.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: CarolC
Date: 20 May 04 - 08:09 PM

I refuse to have anything to do with either soap operas, Girl Scouts, or clothed female accordionists. In fact, the worst thing I can imagine is a soap opera featuring an accordionist wearing a Girl Scout uniform

The fact that you could even imagine it at all is pretty frightening.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 20 May 04 - 08:38 PM

Dear 42:

" Dickens' Mr. Bumble knew what he was talking about when he observed, "the law
is a ass." ("Oliver Twist")", to quote just one recent reference to one of my favorite quotations. Put "The Law is A Ass" into Google -- or better, read all of Dickens' collected works -- and you will find it.

A

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: 42
Date: 21 May 04 - 07:35 AM

A...eh?

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: freda underhill
Date: 21 May 04 - 09:02 AM

In dentibus anticis frustrum magnum spiniciae habes

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 21 May 04 - 09:34 AM

the entire thread loads in 1 minute and 40 seconds at my workstation.

*sigh* I was hoping this single thread balanced out the entire Music side of the cat - but alas - it is several THOUSANDs of posts short at the current moment.

At the time of this posting over 7500 posts are visible on the music side. We've got a measly 32 hundred and change...

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 May 04 - 10:10 AM

Yeah, true, MMario, but the quality, Man! The Quality! E'en The Bard proclaims it:

"The quality of MOAB is not strain'd,        
It droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven        
Upon the place beneath: it is twice bless'd;        
It blesseth them that posts and them that reads:        
'Tis mightiest in the mightiest; it becomes        
The throned musician better than a lyre;        
A lute doth show the force of musical power;        
The accordion doth shock and awe,        
And therein sits the dread and fear of all.        
But MOAB is above this linear sway,        
It is enthroned in the hearts of kings and popes,        
It is an attribute to God his own self,        
And earthly power doth then show likest God's        
When MOAB seasons Musick."

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 21 May 04 - 10:18 AM

y'know - I always figured he'd been mis-qouted with that "mercy" crap they make you learn in school.. the way you have posted (the original I presume?) make much more sense.

BTW - seen any stobor lately?

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 May 04 - 10:21 AM

Oh, 42, you are annoying.

Your grammatical analism was uncalled for, is all.

Freda:

Are you complaining about your teeth?

A

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 May 04 - 10:47 AM

Stobor? Yes, there was a bunch of them outside last night, bringing down one of them lion critters.

But right now the coffee's gitting cold, so I think I'll close this laptop down, get dressed, check out of this motel, and drive back to Pocatello.

Song titles!

"Leaving Boise."

"The Last Time I Saw Boise."

"Sidewalks of Boise."

"I Left My Heart In Boise."

I think I'd better stop....

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 May 04 - 10:57 AM

How about "Boise will be Boise", or "Where the Boise Are"??

A

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 May 04 - 11:01 AM

"Where the Boise River flows", perhaps?

"By the Banks of my lovely Boise"?

"The Bluebells of Boise"?

I'm shutting this down right now.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 21 May 04 - 12:10 PM

Hey, Rap! Is the Chuckorama buffet still in Boise? It's the only eat-till-ya-bust place I've ever been to that had at least 20 different potato dishes on the buffet.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 21 May 04 - 12:15 PM

in Idaho? can you say "low food cost"?

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 21 May 04 - 03:15 PM

I'm not sure if anyone has said this yet on the MOAB...

......................./´¯/)
....................,/¯../
.................../..../
............./´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸
........../'/.../..../......./¨¯\
........('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...')
.........\.................'...../
..........'\'...\.......... _.·´
............\..............(
..............\.............\

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 21 May 04 - 03:21 PM

since it's non-verbal - it still hasn't been said.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 May 04 - 03:23 PM

Jeeze, LH!! The moral of this is to never make you laugh, cuz we'll never hear the end of it!!

A

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: 42
Date: 21 May 04 - 04:43 PM

Amos: I'm sooooo sorry I ruffled your grammatical feathers.

before you know it we'll all be using words without vowels and limiting ourselves to such descriptive gems as "nice" and "good" and "cool" so as not to even attempt to express a specific emotion.

ah well...when William Shatner rules the universe all will change.

j

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,William Shatner
Date: 21 May 04 - 04:58 PM

It's not my wish to rule, merely to set a certain standard by setting a good example. My career speaks for itself when it comes to this. I've never sought the top position, I have simply sought excellence in my chosen field. I advise all of you to do the same.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 May 04 - 07:05 PM

Yes, indeed, there is a Chuck-o-rama in Boise. What is inside is one of Life's Mysteries, since I haven't darken the door of one since about 1993, in Provo, Utah. I remember that they did have delicious scones.

As for low-cost food, hmmmm.... I had very nice trout the other night, with aspargus and small potatoes, an excellent Idaho Riesling, and a lovely chocolate mousse for dessert. The whole thing was about $17.00, excluding tip. Breakfast for two days was the same: an omelette with sharp Tillamook cheddar and Black Forest-style ham, Seattle coffee (brand unknown, but quite good), sourdough toast with butter and Marion blackberry jam, and hash browns -- $8.75, without tip. A bit more than I'd normally pay, but what the hell, much of it's reimburseable and I can deduct the rest.

AND I got to a LARGE Barnes and Noble....

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 May 04 - 08:12 PM

Shatner belongs in the Boise Chuck-o-Rama, as a greeter.

42, my ire was not about the grammar, but about the fine literary reference being misspent in a fit of literary onanism.

A

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 21 May 04 - 08:23 PM

I was in Boise once for about 3 weeks, and I completely missed the Chuck-O-Rama.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 May 04 - 08:29 PM

If ya think its noisy
Hanging around in Joisey
Tell ya what ya oughter do!

Go an' tell yer mama
Ya need some Chuck-o-Rama
'Cuz Boise is the place
(G'wan and scrub yore face!),
Boise is the place fer you-u-u-u!

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 22 May 04 - 03:32 AM

Jesus H Christ Little Hawk (flying into the morning mist on a clear day) What the hell are you doing?
Giving all MOABites the finger?
Telling us in code your a flying bird?
Trying to recite the constitution in one post?
Showing us the constellation that the elusive comets are flying by?
Being a creative master with your fingers?

What is it your trying to say?
I want to know. I need an imput to your output.

Wait........ I think it's a code.
I think I get it.


Why didn't you just say you were learning how to play an accordian?

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: 42
Date: 22 May 04 - 06:42 AM

ah...and I thought you were ireish
j

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: freda underhill
Date: 22 May 04 - 09:54 AM

Amos

In dentibus anticis frustrum magnum spiniciae habes


you have a big chunk of spinach in your teeth.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: JennyO
Date: 22 May 04 - 12:02 PM

Ah, so it WAS about teeth.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 May 04 - 12:42 PM

Thanks, Freda. I know this is not true, though, because I never touch the stuff!! :>))

Nice to know how to say it in Latin, anyway. :>)


A

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Tweed
Date: 22 May 04 - 05:48 PM

I waz just sittin' around yesterday and happened to notix thet I hed a number obv cicadas in my shorts. I habv hard thet this iz a big yare for the critchurs but nebver new them to nest in a fellers boxers afore this imfetstation on my person. Haz anyone else in MOAB got ennythin like thet happen to 'em obv late or iz it just me this time?

They are farly loud insecks and like to scare the crap right outta me late at nite when they get to screechin and what not.

Yerz,
Tweed

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 May 04 - 06:23 PM

Suggest yew gettum outta thear, afore anyone more gentle-minded nor yore self findzum, Tweed!

A

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Tweed
Date: 22 May 04 - 06:42 PM

I thank you fore that advise Amos, but I am gettin' summat fond of the things. The sensation iz not altogether unpleasmant! I recommend to all my fellow MOABITES thet rather than sautayin em or sticking them on skewers they would be of more use placed in yore trousers, boxers, thong or whatever.

Rustic iz at some disadventure obv corse, az she is mostly nekkid and would need to tie them on somehow or other. Howsomever, it iz the weekend and thar iz a party in my pants.

Tweed
Dammit! That sombitch habz some teefez! O, Lissen at them howl...

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 23 May 04 - 12:11 AM

Got cicadas in my britches
God, I hate them sonsabitches
Got cicadas with me everywhere I goes
Well they're flyin' through the air
Got a couple in my hair
And I think I've even got some up my nose

(More verses tomorrow - too tired now)

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: freda underhill
Date: 23 May 04 - 05:07 AM

i can't say a word in Latin, but i have a good Latin web link!

freda

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: freda underhill
Date: 23 May 04 - 08:23 AM

Aquila non captat cicadum


The eagle doesn't catch cicadas (don't swet the small stuff)

(and who wants sweaty cicadas in their knickers, anyway?)

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 23 May 04 - 10:46 AM

I think I'll wear my cicada like this.
I don't want some plant-sucking bug thinking I'm up for being suckled.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 May 04 - 11:25 AM

What a great idea! Little bits of me, encased in plastic and worn as jewelry! I'll make millions! millions! I can live the good life after I'm dead! Hot whoopee!

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 May 04 - 11:39 AM

Umm...Rapaire, I sure don't wanna rain on yore parade or anything but let me just mention that the rat-rodent-skull-under-glass jewelry does not seem to improve the opinion the observer has about rat rodents. Actually if someone came up to me wearing a Rapaire knuckle under glass I wouldn't be too impressed, I would just smile and nod and back away carefully and get a refresher at the free bar in the living-room.

A

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 May 04 - 02:56 PM

Yeah, Amos, but you'd go get the drink anyway. But if you normally wouldn't do so, I'd be helping the liquor industry! By gum, the least they can do is give me a cut of the take for my help! What's the address of Seagram's? I'm being cheated out of money rightfully due me!

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 23 May 04 - 10:41 PM

Geeeeeze. . .Louise. . . but this thread is heavy to move back to the top. . .

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 24 May 04 - 12:42 AM

I am accustomed to bugs checking out my body,
The starchy, feeling legs, I really don't mind.
But if I had a desirably bug upon my body,<
It would be an eight legger I would find.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 24 May 04 - 12:57 AM

Bugs (one category of insect) have six legs--it's spiders that have 8. Is that what you want to find on you, instead of something like a ladybug?

SRS

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 24 May 04 - 06:00 AM

The thread goes on....the thread goes on on on. Reminds me of a song!!

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: freda underhill
Date: 24 May 04 - 10:10 AM

Funnel-web spiders are found in eastern Australia, including Tasmania, in coastal and highland forest regions - as far west as the Gulf Ranges area of South Australia. Gardeners and people digging in soil may encounter Funnel-webs in burrows at any time of the year. The Sydney Funnel-web Spider (Atrax robustus) occurs from Newcastle to Nowra and west to Lithgow.

Funnel-webs are large spiders (1.5 - 4.5 cm body length) with glossy dark brown to black carapace. The abdomen is usually dark plum to black and not patterned. The eyes of Funnel-webs are closely grouped. Male funnel-webs approach the females' hidden burrows, possibly by following the scent of their chemical attractants. During mating, the male must restrain the female from striking him with her fangs using the spurs on his second legs, while he transfers sperm via his palps into her genital opening.

The female then spins a pillow-shaped silk egg sac, into which she lays over 100 eggs. She cleans and turns the egg sac several times during incubation and will defend it vigorously if disturbed. The spiderlings hatch about three weeks later, and stay with the mother for a few months. After two moults, they leave her burrow, dispersing by foot to eventually make their own burrows. Juvenile males will stay in their burrows until their final adult moult, after which they will become wanderers. Funnel-webs mature in about two to four years, with the females living to ten or more years, and the males dying about six to nine months after maturity.

Toxicity
Bites are most prevalent during summer and autumn when males leave the burrows in search of females. Bites are dangerous and can cause serious illness or death. The venom appears to particularly affect primates (ie humans), whereas other mammals - such as cats and dogs - are relatively resistant.

The male Sydney Funnel-web Spider is more dangerous than the female. This is because the toxic venom component that attacks the human and primate nervous symptom so severely is only present in male spiders. Initial symptoms after a bite include local pain, mouth numbness, vomiting, abdominal pain, sweating and salivation, ultimately death, if antivenene is not administered.

I mention all this because Sydney is well populated with funnel web spiders, and also because weve got on to things to do with bugs in this thread. a friend found a funnel web spider on her verandah a few years ago. She put it in a plastic container in the freezer. When it was frozen, she dipped it in epoxy resin and made an earring from it.