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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Amos 15 Mar 09 - 06:07 PM
Rapparee 15 Mar 09 - 05:41 PM
Amos 15 Mar 09 - 05:16 PM
GUEST,Don McBride 15 Mar 09 - 02:55 PM
Rapparee 15 Mar 09 - 01:06 PM
Acme 15 Mar 09 - 12:17 PM
Rapparee 15 Mar 09 - 11:57 AM
Rapparee 15 Mar 09 - 07:58 AM
Amos 15 Mar 09 - 04:27 AM
Janie 15 Mar 09 - 12:52 AM
Acme 15 Mar 09 - 12:21 AM
Janie 15 Mar 09 - 12:01 AM
Amos 14 Mar 09 - 11:54 PM
Acme 14 Mar 09 - 10:45 PM
Janie 14 Mar 09 - 10:13 PM
Amos 14 Mar 09 - 09:52 PM
Amos 14 Mar 09 - 11:48 AM
Acme 14 Mar 09 - 11:05 AM
Amos 14 Mar 09 - 11:00 AM
Janie 14 Mar 09 - 08:14 AM
MMario 13 Mar 09 - 04:34 PM
Amos 13 Mar 09 - 04:31 PM
MMario 13 Mar 09 - 04:20 PM
Acme 13 Mar 09 - 03:57 PM
Amos 13 Mar 09 - 03:11 PM
MMario 13 Mar 09 - 12:52 PM
Acme 13 Mar 09 - 12:47 PM
MMario 13 Mar 09 - 12:05 PM
Acme 13 Mar 09 - 11:47 AM
Amos 13 Mar 09 - 11:29 AM
MMario 13 Mar 09 - 10:11 AM
Amos 13 Mar 09 - 10:01 AM
Amos 13 Mar 09 - 03:42 AM
Acme 12 Mar 09 - 11:00 PM
Amos 12 Mar 09 - 08:39 PM
Amos 12 Mar 09 - 04:06 PM
VirginiaTam 12 Mar 09 - 03:10 PM
Acme 12 Mar 09 - 03:04 PM
Amos 12 Mar 09 - 12:15 PM
Acme 12 Mar 09 - 11:15 AM
Amos 12 Mar 09 - 10:08 AM
Amos 12 Mar 09 - 01:11 AM
Acme 11 Mar 09 - 11:40 PM
Amos 11 Mar 09 - 11:25 PM
Little Hawk 11 Mar 09 - 10:21 PM
Amos 11 Mar 09 - 08:55 PM
Little Hawk 11 Mar 09 - 06:57 PM
VirginiaTam 11 Mar 09 - 04:44 PM
Janie 11 Mar 09 - 03:37 PM
Acme 11 Mar 09 - 03:28 PM

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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Mar 09 - 06:07 PM

What a wonderful tale!! You should go on these long adventures more often!!!



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Mar 09 - 05:41 PM

Well Don, it's like this, and I got this straight from the horse's end, if you take my meaning.

My wife and I were driving the rental car back, gonna fly outa Dublin Airport, this past Friday morning. We had to top off the tank, so we pulling into a petrol station in Coolquoy, County Dublin -- I don't remember the brand, but it was one of the two stations along the R135 so it shouldn't be too hard to find.

I paid and when I came out there was a Garda (i.e., cop) there. He asked if I was Canadian and I said no, I was from the US. "Close enough at this distance," says he, "we need your help."

So I followed him around to the back of the station and there were four Gardai (copS) holding the scummiest looking human being it's been my misfortune to see in a very, very long time and I've seen some scummy ones, let me tell you.

A Sergeant came up and said, "Do you think, Sir, you could translate what this...personl...is saying? We think he wants to flip boltholes, but sure, it's hard to tell."

What the pitiable excuse for a human being was saying was very much like "Lissen you flippin' boltholes! Some Sudbury skanks tricked me and hit me on the head and when I flippin' woke up I was in a crate with a two-four of flippin BLUE and dozen day-old Tim's and it was flippin' COLD and I was goin' somewhere! So I figgered out I was in an airplane and would be rescued when I got to where ever I was goin' and then I'd hitch back from Toronto or Ottawa or where ever the flip I was and fix them flippin' bolthole skanks. Only when I woke up it was quiet and I could tell I wasn't in the flippin' airplane anymore, so I broke out of the crate and when I got outside I saw I WASN'T IN FLIPPIN' CANADA! I was so flippin' mad I screamed, which made somebody yell at me and I told them what a flippin' bolthole they were and when he came out he was like a flippin' TRUCK! So I ran. Finally I smelled (and I didn't FLIPPIN' BELIEVE IT!) what was Tim's coffee AND donuts! In where ever the flip I am! Next thing I know these four flippin' boltholes are draggin' me back through the window! I think they're cops and I'm Shane McBride of Blind River, Ontario, CANADA!"

I looked him over, such as there was to look at, and asked him quietly, "Do you know Rapaire?"

He broke into a long, not very creative, string of curses until one of the Gardai told him to "shut the feck up." I turned to the Sergeant and said, "Sergeant, I think this is Shane McBride of Blind River, Ontario. You'll have to check with the Canadian Embassy, but if it is the McBride person....

"Well, Sergeant, Shane McBride is probably the worst person in all of Ireland's long history. He betrayed Robert Emmett to the Brits, pointed out where Roger Casement was hiding in that tennis court, poisoned Theobald Wolfe Tone, sold out Owen Roe, blew out the lights on Banna Strand, informed on the Bold Fenian Men, laughed and coughed all over Pearse as he read The Declaration in front of the GPO, loaded the rifles that shot James Connolly, and gave Cromwell directions to both Armagh and Kilkenny. He got worse as he grew older."

"Right, Sir! Thank you!" said the Sergeant. Then he took out a truncheon and said to The Pitiable Excuse, "Come along, me bucko. We've got a right nice place fer yez."

I went back into the station, bought a dozen of Tim Horton's donuts which I gave to the Gardai, and then I got in the car and we left.

Just doing my bit to help law enforcement, Don.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Mar 09 - 05:16 PM

I don't see hpw ypu can support your idle charge of abuse, Rapaire, and welcome back too. After all, Little Hawk took advantage of your absence by not posting at all!! This immediately gave rise to a rumor to the effect that Little Hawk is actually Rapaire's long-sought secret identity. Or was it the other way 'round? Anyway, given the complex array of pseudo-transactions between ourself and LH's assorted figments, including that night you spent with Chinga, it seems clear there is a solipsistic connection going on here that should be borught to Mom's attention.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Don McBride
Date: 15 Mar 09 - 02:55 PM

How the flip could he of got over to flippin' Ireland? I think you musta seen some one else. Could be maybe a distent relative of ourn. Shane was here last ngight and today too. He is tryin' to get alloud into the liberry again to use their computers but they are sayin' "No way." No FLIPPIN' way is what I would say ifn I was them but I am not. Them peole don't say words like "flip" becoz they are too high flipp8in' class, eh?

- Don


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Mar 09 - 01:06 PM

Don't forget the Potawatomi and the "Trail of Death." In some ways it was worse than the "Trail of Tears." And of course there's the Long Walk to the Bosque Redondo.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 15 Mar 09 - 12:17 PM

Janie, there is a lot of information available about the Cherokee and their movements as well as their politics, land problems, even slave-owning available. It was something I came across a lot when working on my MA in English (American Indian lit was my focus). I'll send you a couple of good citations to get you started reading, if you're interested.

Rap, anyone knows that you can't use olives AND capers with such a tender flavored dish as Mediterranean house gecko on pasta. The recipe says to choose one or the other, or you'll overpower the gecko. And a little goes a long way.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Mar 09 - 11:57 AM

Well, okay, I guess nobody cares enough about Shame to what to know.

Anyway, I have returned and I found Mom was sorely neglected and abused in my absence. Fie upon you who would do such a thing! Fie, I say, fie!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Mar 09 - 07:58 AM

That sort of gecko is best served in Extra Virgin Olive Oil infused with capers and sun-dried tomatoes, lemon, black or Kalamati olives and a side of fine pasta.

Geez, a guy comes back after flying for two days (broken only by a nice night's sleep in Chicago) and finds that you people don't even know how to cook Mediterranean gecko properly.

The BIG news is that the late Shame McBride is not dead. In fact, I spoke with him as he was being held by four Gardai behind the the petrol station in Coolquoy, County Dublin. I'll explain when I've had more sleep, but it is a story filled with danger, adventure, romance, cheap beer, and Tim Horton's Donuts. I'm very much afraid that Shame is in an Irish lockup, however.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Mar 09 - 04:27 AM

Either that, or they don't love us anymore.

Well, that's so improbable as to b impossible so we'd better start a bail fund for yon Rapaire.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 15 Mar 09 - 12:52 AM

I've no doubt this qualifies as BS.

Easter weekend we are taking a trek with several family members way back into the hills and hollers of eastern Kentucky to visit the homeplaces and graveyards of my paternal family. The trip was originally planned for last fall but had to be cancelled.

Sister Annie started getting involved with doing genealogical research about a year ago, and it has been quite interesting. Our cultural heritage is predominantly Scotch-Irish and Welsh. All of our old world ancestors on both sides of the family came to America well before the revolution, and all of them headed for the Appalachian mountains very quickly, whether they landed in New Jersey, North Carolina, or several ports in between. All came from areas of the British Isles and during times that suggest hard times in the old world, and religious dissent as the motivators. That was not a surprise. What was a surprise was to learn that we have Native Americans in our ancestry on the paternal side. My 5 times great grandmother was half Cherokee., Anne White Cloud.   Her son, my 4 times great grandfather, was a spy for the Colonial army among tribes that fought on behalf of the British, was captured by Native Americans and taken to Ohio, where he lived for several years. It is not clear what tribe he was with, but it appears to have been one of the tribes that lived near Lake Erie. He married my 4 times great grandmother while living with them. Her father was a french fur trader and her mother was Native American.

Their gravesites are among those we are going to try to visit. We know from Annie's correspondence with distant cousins that the graveyard and grave stones still stand, but the area all around the graveyard was strip-mined about 50 years ago. The graveyard is on top of a ridge. Regulations forbade the coal company from disturbing the graveyard itself, but they stripped all around it, so access is up what nearly amounts to a cliff. Even before it was stripped, access was tough. My Dad remembers being a pallbearer for his grandfather, when I was a baby, and the ordeal it was to carry that coffin up the side of the ridge through the woods even before it was stripped.

Funny thing is this - there has long been a family legend that there was Cherokee on the maternal side of my family, but a number of family members have done research in recent years and that appears to not be true. There was never a word spoken about it on the paternal side, however. That grandfather, (Phillip Williams), was legendary in his revolutionary war activities, and was known in the family as Phillip the Indian Fighter. But the fact that he and his wife were both part Native American was never passed down in the oral traditions of the family.

You sure can't tell it by looking at me. I look like those Viking genes remained intact after landing in Scotland.

BWL must have had a good business at the rennaisance (spelling?) fair and is now too busy making more pots to BS with us.

Rapaire is probably in gaol after starting a sword fight with some one.

Either that, or they don't love us anymore.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 15 Mar 09 - 12:21 AM

In the window screen tussles I've seen, the one that runs is usually the one that gets bit first.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 15 Mar 09 - 12:01 AM

Wish we had geckos here. When I used to spend winters in the Keys in an old travel trailer that was home to many geckos, I loved watching them crawl around on the windows over the lamp. Every now and then, we'd get to see two males fight. A miniature dinosaur battle is what it looked like. No one ever seemed to get hurt and we never could figure out what cosmotology determined who won and who ran.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Mar 09 - 11:54 PM

YEah, and the frying pan in which I cooked up that gecko for Mom needs serious stripping...



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 14 Mar 09 - 10:45 PM

I cleaned up my son's computer desk (lots of stuff in a box) and I'm sure he'll be annoyed when he comes in and finds it, but I was tired of the paper and the dust. And I moved it. That's my excuse and I'm sticking to it. I had to clean it to move it.

Does Mom want me to clean her oscillating fan while I'm at it? I cleaned my son's. We're getting into fan season one of these days soon.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 14 Mar 09 - 10:13 PM

Sounds like a loverly day!

Chill and rainy in these parts. Sum Yung Sun and I had a quiet lazy day just being with each other, capped off by pizza and watching "Children of Huang Shi."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Mar 09 - 09:52 PM

Wow!! We just got back from a neat trip high into the mountains north of here, on long windy roads up into high desert and rolling green hills and into the pine forests, then down the other side zigging and zagging to the desert floor and into Palm Desert where we had a nice lunch with an English artist. Then we came home.

Meanwhile Mom has been hitting the absinthe and sinking slowly...


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Mar 09 - 11:48 AM

They were probably glowering at each other, each one thinking that the other had a better deal in life...




A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 14 Mar 09 - 11:05 AM

I wonder what eats geckos? Snakes, tarantulas, probably. My dogs have tried a few, I am certain. They won't eat the toads, they emit a bad-tasting liquid, but I bet geckos don't. I saw an amazing thing yesterday--on a bare tree near the railroad tracks there was a red tailed hawk (or an owl--it was that size) and a crow perched near each other (on adjacent branches). I wonder if they were discussing the relative merits of eating rodents versus herps?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Mar 09 - 11:00 AM

HEy Mom!! Here's a boild gecko and a nice glass of orange juice....


Gotta run!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 14 Mar 09 - 08:14 AM

Poor Mom, everyone out carousing on a Friday night and neglecting you terribly.

I caroused by working late and then falling asleep on the couch about 8:00 pm.

It looks to be a chill, rainy day so don't think we'll go to the UNC-Duke Lacrosse game. I'm a fair weather fan.

Here, let me pull this warm throw over your legs. The biscuits will be out of the oven shortly.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 13 Mar 09 - 04:34 PM

I'm sure the Gieco Gecko has his green card.   Or a work visa of some sort. Most of them furrin actors (Like the Shatnerd fello) do. And the GG certainly *sounds) foriegn.

But it t'ain't natchr'l fur geckos to TALK either.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Mar 09 - 04:31 PM

Well, then, you'll have to explain who makes them, because our best robotocists aren't even close to putting that much proce3ssing power in a such a small, wet, dome, especially with full optical character recognition and small-muscle and small-valve coordination (whatever they use on their toeses).

And what about that insurance company that pays that gecko for doing all those full-color TV ads? Isn't that illegal?

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 13 Mar 09 - 04:20 PM

If they was natchral critters, would they have elliptical pupils? No other geckos in the Yewnited States has elliptical pupils.

Proof POSITIVE! Them illegal geckos ain't natchral!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 13 Mar 09 - 03:57 PM

You think what a gecko can do is natural? Suction cup fingers is 'natural?' Hang out on a shiny slippery piece of glass and catch moths attracted by the light inside the room at night?

I thought only Gluon could actually do that. The rest is smoke and mirrors (and rubber cement on their feet).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Mar 09 - 03:11 PM

Well, I dunno. I thought only humans could eb illegal in themselves. Have we gotten to the point of outlawing natch'l critters?



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 13 Mar 09 - 12:52 PM

Paying the gecko under the table! Now the IRS will be after you!

Woe!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 13 Mar 09 - 12:47 PM

Some of us know that the labor this gecko does as far as eating pest bugs is useful. He's fed under the table. And the flower pots. And the leaf litter. . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 13 Mar 09 - 12:05 PM

Your navel is hibernating?

Stilly - Did you check that gecko for a proper Visa/passport/green card? We all know the problem down in Texas w/ illegal immigrants and it is a Mediterranean gecko - not a Texas Gecko.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 13 Mar 09 - 11:47 AM

My dogs are hibernating today. It's cold and rainy again. But I have a non-hibernating Mediterranean house gecko in a salad dressing tub in the sun room. I found it lethargic on the door step yesterday. It warmed up on my hand, dropped it's tail, but wasn't warm enough overall to make it into it's usual spot (probably in the attic) when I tried to put it on the side of the house. So it's in the tub, with a couple of rocks to hide behind and a couple of meal worms for company or nosh, whichever it chooses. I'll let it go when it warms up again.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Mar 09 - 11:29 AM

Well, it's the funnest thing that's happened to me since the last Getaway, is all. It's too chilly to kayak at dawn and work is not stimulating, and my novel is apparently hibernating.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 13 Mar 09 - 10:11 AM

Amos and his i-phone. At least he's not asking MOM to have text with him!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Mar 09 - 10:01 AM

I am glad to welcome Friday. The fatigue-of-labor cycle is in its weekly closing phase. Tomorrow, Mom, I will be on the road to Palm Desert, but if you get desperate call my iPhone.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Mar 09 - 03:42 AM

Yes, you did, but spellchecks often fail, especially in commercial nouns.

Regardless, since the map is not the territory, Mom should be happy even if it were misspelled.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 12 Mar 09 - 11:00 PM

Sorry, I was busy in the kitchen. Bread is baked, soup was hot, and we had a wonderful warm meal on this cold and rainy evening. I gave Mom some on that side table next to her barcalounger in front of the TV. She's watching her NetFlix DVDs tonight.

I used the Google spell check just now--I don't know if I have "barcalounger" spelled correctly. These are the suggestions it gave me after highlighting the word:

clanger
backlog
clunker
aqualung
belong


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Mar 09 - 08:39 PM

Oh, Mom!! There you go again, sniffing among the back alleys of Lower BS!! Don't you know there's dangers for a comely crittur like yourself in such places? Don't you???


(She loves it when I tell her how comely she is).



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Mar 09 - 04:06 PM

Bruce has set me straight on the Second Sun concept. It would add a prohibitive overhead to our carbon balance and ruin the temperature equation of the planet. But if we split the existing sun in half, maybe that would work?


Or I could just get more sleep at night.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 12 Mar 09 - 03:10 PM

Some dedicate a webpage to the subtleties of leaning toast.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 12 Mar 09 - 03:04 PM

You don't think the solar system would be a little crowded?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Mar 09 - 12:15 PM

Well, fine. My pointi s that if we had a uniform planetary daylight cycle, instead of the current rotary scheme, then people in Japan would work the same hours we do here, and I wouldn't have to miss dinner to help out a Japanese customer. I thought a second Sun was an elegant solution...

Ev'y'body's talking 'bout the second Sun
But in this world there is only one,
There's just one,
There's just one
There's just one only one,
One single solitary Sun.




A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 12 Mar 09 - 11:15 AM

I worked late last night also but I simply turned on the ceiling light in the room. I didn't require a sun at that point in time.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Mar 09 - 10:08 AM

Hi, Mom.

I had to go back to the office for an hour late last night to help resolve a problem for a customer in Japan. I think we need another Sun so we can have equal opportunity daylight hours.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Mar 09 - 01:11 AM

Just the interesting ones. The only trouble is I can't see how to become a retired OB/GYN without going to an awful lot of trouble to become a practicing one first. I guess the first step is recognizing that you DO need to practice, huh? Kinda like AA recognizing there is a problem.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 11 Mar 09 - 11:40 PM

And you'd see retired patients?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Mar 09 - 11:25 PM

Indeed. I am thinking of becoming a retired OB/GYN for the same reason.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Mar 09 - 10:21 PM

That would be a great excuse for travelling to interesting places. ;-)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Mar 09 - 08:55 PM

No, there is not. SOme people sniff bicycle seats, others analyze gastric emissions, some try to make music by eructation, some collect toothpicks with poems inscribed on them in tiny script, even though no-one can read them. SO people grade coprolite, so people collect pieces of old human hair. I know one guy whose hobby is wandering around staring at lighthouses.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Mar 09 - 06:57 PM

Maybe people do it (Facebook, etc) so they can be digitally reassured every day that, yes, they DO exist and that their lives have some significance. ;-D I can't believe all the trivial stuff there is to do on Facebook and it's a mystery to me why anyone could be bothered to figure it all out and keep track of it.

However, there's no explaining people's hobbies, is there?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 11 Mar 09 - 04:44 PM

I am on Live Journal, My Space, Face Book and Twitter (joined for various and sundry reasons). They all pale in comparison to the Mighty Mudcat. Long live Mudcat.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 11 Mar 09 - 03:37 PM

heheheh!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 11 Mar 09 - 03:28 PM

Janie, I keep closing down more and more of Facebook. But in a leap of technological optimism, I signed up for Twitter. I don't know anyone who does it, but I know that the Diane Rehm show uses it, so I set up to "watch" there. And while I was at it, I looked around and another NPR personality has an account. So I set that up to "watch" as well--and this morning I found that person is watching back! Now what on earth could I say that this person would find interesting? "I just washed my car" or "My son missed the school bus so I had to drive him over and he was soaking wet" or other mundane stuff.

It really is bizarre.

John In Kansas started a thread (there is only the one post and it's well down the page) about how to quit various online site, in case you're interested. He posted a link from one of the journals--PC Magazine or CNet, one of those. I just glanced at it but I did trace it to find again later. In case I want to quit Tweeting. :)

MOM wants to tweet, though. She's been tweeting non-stop to try to reach Rap's cel phone, but he's in Ireland. I think he left his phone on and plugged in at his house, so when he gets home he's going to find about 275 text messages tweeted by MOM to his "device."


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