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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Rapparee 31 Dec 08 - 08:13 AM
Little Hawk 31 Dec 08 - 02:14 AM
Stilly River Sage 31 Dec 08 - 01:49 AM
Amos 31 Dec 08 - 01:24 AM
Rapparee 30 Dec 08 - 11:28 PM
Donuel 30 Dec 08 - 10:57 PM
Donuel 30 Dec 08 - 10:52 PM
Little Hawk 30 Dec 08 - 10:34 PM
Rapparee 30 Dec 08 - 10:20 PM
Amos 30 Dec 08 - 09:13 PM
MMario 30 Dec 08 - 08:41 PM
Amos 30 Dec 08 - 07:01 PM
Rapparee 30 Dec 08 - 06:26 PM
Amos 30 Dec 08 - 05:56 PM
Rapparee 30 Dec 08 - 05:29 PM
Rapparee 30 Dec 08 - 05:28 PM
Amos 30 Dec 08 - 05:20 PM
Little Hawk 30 Dec 08 - 05:17 PM
Amos 30 Dec 08 - 05:13 PM
Little Hawk 30 Dec 08 - 05:09 PM
MMario 30 Dec 08 - 04:12 PM
Little Hawk 30 Dec 08 - 04:02 PM
Amos 30 Dec 08 - 03:27 PM
Amos 30 Dec 08 - 03:10 PM
Rapparee 30 Dec 08 - 02:41 PM
Amos 30 Dec 08 - 02:19 PM
Rapparee 30 Dec 08 - 01:56 PM
Stilly River Sage 30 Dec 08 - 01:54 PM
Rapparee 30 Dec 08 - 01:35 PM
Amos 30 Dec 08 - 12:29 PM
Little Hawk 30 Dec 08 - 12:05 PM
Amos 30 Dec 08 - 11:33 AM
Little Hawk 30 Dec 08 - 10:31 AM
Little Hawk 30 Dec 08 - 10:24 AM
Little Hawk 30 Dec 08 - 10:12 AM
Amos 30 Dec 08 - 08:48 AM
MMario 30 Dec 08 - 08:45 AM
Rapparee 30 Dec 08 - 07:46 AM
Amos 30 Dec 08 - 07:21 AM
Little Hawk 30 Dec 08 - 06:25 AM
Little Hawk 30 Dec 08 - 06:10 AM
Little Hawk 30 Dec 08 - 05:37 AM
Rapparee 29 Dec 08 - 10:25 PM
Stilly River Sage 29 Dec 08 - 10:13 PM
Amos 29 Dec 08 - 10:04 PM
Stilly River Sage 29 Dec 08 - 03:37 PM
Little Hawk 29 Dec 08 - 03:19 PM
Amos 29 Dec 08 - 02:47 PM
Little Hawk 29 Dec 08 - 02:03 PM
Amos 29 Dec 08 - 01:55 PM

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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 Dec 08 - 08:13 AM

Deer lard, Amos. Eddie Cantor is rolling over in his grave, and my reputation is being sullied by your lack of musical knowledge!

If you knew Susie, like I know Susie
Oh! Oh! Oh! What a girl
There's none so classy
As this fair lassie,
Oh! Oh! Holy Moses, what a chassis
We went riding, she didn't balk
Back from Yonkers
I'm the one that had to walk
If you knew Susie, Like I know Susie
Oh! Oh! What a girl!

If you knew Susie, like I know Susie
Oh! Oh! Oh! What a girl
She wears long tresses
And nice tight dresses
Oh! Oh! What a future she possesses
Out in public
How she can yawn
In a parlour, you would think the war was on
If you knew Susie, like I know Susie
Oh! Oh! What a girl.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 31 Dec 08 - 02:14 AM

Ron tells me he's had half the women in town, but I've still only met one who claims she's had Ron.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 31 Dec 08 - 01:49 AM

It wouldn't be a car, it would be a pickup truck. Evidently the overlay of the photos still works with the coordinates I gave you before. Last time I looked at my house in the map the truck was in the driveway.

I'm not a hadron and I have excited states also. I think we're talking parallel universe here.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 31 Dec 08 - 01:24 AM

Oh, BRAVO, Rapaire!! An original!!! Yayyyy!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 11:28 PM

Gluon will do it.

If you knew Gluon
Like we know Gluon
Oh, oh, oh what a duckdog!
There's none so classy
Not even Lassie,
Oh, oh, what a duckdog!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 10:57 PM

There will no experiments involving participle collisions because the Large Hardon Collider had a spill and no one is willing to clean it up until maybe sometime in August.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 10:52 PM

bugger off you bastards bugger off!


I think you've all been drinking !


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 10:34 PM

Your analysis of the process we term Shatnerization is brilliant, Amos. Simply brilliant!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 10:20 PM

It's also inaccurate. If you'd like to see my house you have to look at 2240 South Fairway Drive, Pocatello, ID -- which puts it on the wrong side of the street and 41 numbers off. (If you do peek at it, take a look at the house to the right as well. It's in foreclosure again.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 09:13 PM

In another "random poke" I found a map with a picture of Stilly's house marked "No Car In Driveway" when there was plainly a car in the driveway. One of the many miracle mysteries of Mom's Murky Meanderings. GoogleMaps is a number of years out of date. Before the new driveway, before the landscaping, before the new fence and gate, the RAV4, before the Prius, this was my house but it was so much older then--it's younger than that now.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 08:41 PM



Well - we all KNOW that Gluon is not confined within the hadrons; so I suspect that yes, s/he could use a digital camara.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 07:01 PM

One of my favoriter sports at Mom's place is randomly hitting one of those hundreds of blue numbers up at the top. Random poke, and see whatchoo get.

Here's the latest dredge and trawl from the mystics depths of Mom's Past:

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos - PM
Date: 24 Nov 05 - 09:56 AM

Shatnerisation is a condition achieved by any set of a finite number of units whose transactions consist of BS. The complexity rules apply: when the number of BS transactions achieves a certain density a new order of BS emerges such that William Shatner seems to make sense.

This condition also -- but rarely -- occurs within the individual cognitive system, and when it does the individual so affected becomes delusory about positive qualities he perceives to be emanating from said Shatner. While this has no bearing on reality, it can accelerate Shatnerization in a group into which the affected individual injects transactions having an inordinate aberrative vector. This accelerates the normal process, and Shatnerization when catalyzed by such an element, tends toward the catastrophic.

A


Top that!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 06:26 PM

Which is why I'm not a vegetarian.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 05:56 PM

You are what you eat, Rapaire.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 05:29 PM

(Please note how careful I am to spell "hadron" correctly. One little slip....)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 05:28 PM

I have several excited states. Am I a hadron?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 05:20 PM

ANy guru knows, it's all in the energy, Little Hawk.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 05:17 PM

How do you know when a hadron's been had?

How can you tell when a gluon has become unglued?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 05:13 PM

Let's see...digital cameras respond tp photons...particles of no mass, but momentum. Hadrons have excited states known as resonances. Each ground-state hadron may have several excited states; hundreds of resonances have been observed in particle physics experiments. Resonances decay extremely quickly (within about 10−24 seconds) via the strong nuclear force. In other phases of matter the hadrons may disappear. For example, at very high temperature and high pressure, unless there are sufficiently many flavors of quarks, the theory of quantum chromodynamics (QCD) predicts that quarks and gluons will interact weakly and will no longer be confined within hadrons. This property, which is known as asymptotic freedom, has been experimentally confirmed at the energy scales between a GeV and a TeV.[2]

Do you think, given this, that a digital camera would slow Gluon down below the threshold of interoperability with hadrons?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 05:09 PM

Hamsters and hadrons...they both get no respect! "Simple" indeed! Humph!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 04:12 PM

*sigh* Scientists make things so complicated.

Wouldn't it be much simpler if they could just stop trying to model these things and teach Gluon how to use a digital camara to get some good photos, instead? Since gluon would be in each of the quarks of the hadron s/he could get a complete panoramic multi-view.

And I have to wonder about the political correctness of referring to the hadron as simple. Certainly, there is no denying that most hadrons are not intellectually gifted, and that some may even be intellectually challenged; but "simple" just will not do as a descriptive term.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 04:02 PM

Yes, but is it as complex as keeping one's girlfriend or wife secure, relaxed, and happy at all times?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 03:27 PM

Computing the Basics:

While protons, neutrons, and other light hadrons are considered basic particles, the mathematics describing their innards is incredibly complex. The simple picture of the inside of any hadron is three quarks that exchange gluons, the messenger particle of the strong nuclear force, among themselves. Reality is much more complicated, and our best description of the strong force—quantum chromodynamics (QCD)—requires incredibly powerful computers to have any hope of accurately modeling even a "simple" hadron. Using massively parallel computers and a technique known as lattice quantum chromodynamics, researchers in Europe have predicted the mass of a proton using only the theory behind the strong force. The fact that their computed mass is within a few percent of the experimental answer suggests that QCD properly describes the strong nuclear force. (Ars Technica)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 03:10 PM

Hip? Dropping cellphones in the terlet? I guess Archie Bunker would call that hip.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 02:41 PM

"Dave [Kellett, the creator of 'Sheldon'] is a Southern-California native...[he] lives with his wonderfully talented wife Gloria in Los Angeles, creating Sheldon for hip folks like yourself."

--From the author's bio. Some slight emphasis supplied.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 02:19 PM

You have no idea of what you speak, sir; thou wotteth not the good folks of Calfornia, nor the beauties of the iPhone. Let me point out that when we ride folks out of state for bad practices (eating meat, wasting trees, high MPG, and the like) we send them to places like Pocatello. When you try to get into California you will pass through an Eligibility Checkpoint manned by our best telepathic SNAGs, in brown uniforms. Most cars they wave on through, but one of those three-strikes types finds himself in Secondary faster than you can say "Home, Lassie!".


And, as a rule, Californians only put in toilets those things designed for that purposes, such as turds and bum-wad. We tend toward digital dexterity and a reasonable relationship with our opposable thumbs, unlike the goofus in your Sheldon strip, who is clearly from the northern Midwest.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 01:56 PM

Yep, out here we call 'em "Californios." Like in "Them Californios are californicatin' Idaho right inta the ground."

'Tain't a compliment....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 01:54 PM

MOM, you'll be happy to know I finally got into my old files, and I'm going to back them up before I do anything else. But I have such a tangle of layers and permissions and most of my programs aren't in the registry that I'm going to have to keep working on this for a while. Meanwhile, I have some soup on the stove and it should be ready in about an hour.

Little Hawk, you can come visit Texas if you want to see kind of what south is like (they act southern), even though here they call it west and it is geographically in the midwest. Doesn't matter how far south Amos is, he's just west. They don't even call themselves southwest, even though they have the best claim to the name.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 01:35 PM

All you need to know about iPhones.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 12:29 PM

Well, just so there is no false advertising, I actually had to wear a sweater on the drive to work at 04:40 this morning. It has warmed up since then, though, so I have taken it off.

We do get rain once in a while which can be chilly in winter, and once I even had some frost on my windshield when I went otu int he morning.

The nearest we come to snow, though, is up in the Cuyamacas, a good forty miles east and up from here. Folks take their kids up there in winter to go sledding so they don't grow up culturally deprived.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 12:05 PM

Well, it's worth thinking about...specially at this time of year.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 11:33 AM

San Diego is full of interesting activities just right for a man of your kidney, Little Hawk. I am sure the rest of you can find something interesting to do, also.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 10:31 AM

Or was that "add injury to insult"? Hmmm.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 10:24 AM

(Note typos in above post, due to exhaustion from having gotten up at 3:48 AM.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 10:12 AM

Are you aware, Rapaire, that Wolfe was slain on the Plains of Abraham back during the French and Indian War? Accordindly, the continuance his line has already been imperiled by his demise. I hardly regard it proper to add insult to injury by castrating one of his few living descendants now in order to cure a hangover!

Furthermore, I have this to say to your claim of being up at 3:06....

Liar! Liar! Pants on fire!

Interesting to hear that your God is female, though. Mine is too, but it's a different female from yours. She looks a bit as I would imagine Joan of Arc or some Elven warrior-maiden from one of those heroic tales.

******

Amos, I would LOVE to relocate further south.

Want to swap properties? ;-) I can consider moving stateside now that Obama's been elected.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 08:48 AM

Oh, please, MM--Rapaire does not do sources, donchaknow!!



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 08:45 AM

Okay Rap - where are those recipes from? I seem to recall seeing them before....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 07:46 AM

I was up at 3:06 a.m. but had the good sense to go back to sleep because not even the god I created gets up at that hour. In fact, I had to yell to wake her up so that LH would know to start his sump pump before his whole house was awash. "Hey, Sweetie-Poo!" I yelled. "Make sure Little Hawk is up before his scuppers overflow!" (Sweetie-Poo is her name.)

The I awakened at the more civilized (but barely so) hour of 5:04 a.m., finished a book on medicine, and here I am.

Shame should use a good hangover remedy: dissolve three dried and powdered mouse testicles, a heaping spoonful of fresh cow manure, and a lump of copperas in a bottle of spirits of wine and sip until the hangover goes away. NOTE: the testicles must be taken from a living mouse.

You can also use the testicles of a "wolfe" which again must be taken from a living "wolfe". In this recipe you don't have to add the cow manure, but to make the medicine work more quickly add two whiskers from the face of the "wolfe", one from each side.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 07:21 AM

I rose at 4:03 to find you were already up, Hawk. What are you up to? Your psychic perception of the flooding sump is quite impressive. But I don't envy you this weather. Perhaps you should relocate further south.

Condolences on Shane.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 06:25 AM

Ha. Rapaire's not up yet either. Are you? (gloat, gloat...preen, preen) ;-)

Gawd...it's sooooo early here! I think I'm getting a bit delirious.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 06:10 AM

Oh, Rap? Shane takes a dim view of what you said. A very dim view. Actually, he takes a very dim view of just about everything right now. He's badly hung over. It seems that Don made the mistake of leaving a two-four of Export AND a bottle of cheap Canuck whisky unguarded, and Shane arrived home from a little adventure in Spanish (nearby town), figured there's no time like the present, and that he had better drink as much of it as possible before Don came home.

He's not dead. He just wishes he was at the present time. The weather's lousy up there too.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Dec 08 - 05:37 AM

Okay, Amos, today I got up at 3:48 AM. Beat that. ;-)

I'll tell you why I did that. We had a vicious windstorm and blizzard here tonight and it knocked out the power around midnight. By about 3:30 I was lying there and beginning to wonder if the sump pump might be overflowing yet. I went downstairs with a flashlight and checked. It was just beginning to flood out onto the floor.

Okay, so out into the howling storm to start the generator (which hasn't been started for, oh, a year or two...

Well, lucky that I have a can of this stuff called "Liquid Fire" for starting balky engines. When you start something as seldom as this generator gets started, it's a bit tricky remembering where the various switches are (choke, on/off switch/line to power switch), specially when it's pitch black outside in a storm and you're trying to do it all by the light of a flashlight...however, I figured it out after a bit. (Now let's see if I still remember it all next time. Ha!) Between that and the Liquid Fire, I got the thing going.

Whew! So that got the sump pumps going and I averted the flood. By this time it was about 4:15. The main power came on again at around 4:45 and the wind is dying down gradually, with a forecast for tomorrow that looks like just moderate winds instead of a mini-hurricane. Good.

I think tonight's adventures are over. Since I didn't really get any sleep tonight, I figured, hell, why not crow over the fact that I got up EARLIER THAN AMOS!!!!!!! Oh yeah! ;-) (one has to find pleasure in small things, I figure)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Dec 08 - 10:25 PM

Roughly four hours from the last post. The plane was late and I missed the shuttle by, literally, minutes and had to take the next one.

My driveway was clear down to cement -- HA! I made arrangements before I left just in case it DID snow, and it did. Of course, it helped that the temperature went up to 40+F today.

As for Shame McBride, I'm sorry he's dead. He was such a good bad example for us all that he is badly missed, although with practice I'm sure we could do better and not miss so badly the next time. With his karma I am certain he'll be back, perhaps as a dung beetle or one of those beetles that eats the flesh off dead bodies.

Amos:

Schism is pronounced "skism" and rhymes with "jism". The thirteenth secretary of the treasury (of the US) was Levy Woodbury of New Hampshire. I really don't follow baseball enough to care about Babe Ruth's batting average, but Lou Gehrig's lifetime was .340. I didn't need an iphone for that, since the Christian Brothers in high school gave me a very extensive background in Schisms and Schismatics and the nuns in grade school made us memorize the first fifteen Secs of the Treasury (among many other such things). And I've always liked Lou Gehrig more than Babe Ruth.

Besides, the screen is too small to be readily legible and too large to fit easily into your pocket -- and even though my wife owns some of their stock I don't care for AT&T. What I REALLY want is a cell phone that's unlocked and will work world-wide -- know where I can get one? We've been trying all the usual suspects.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 29 Dec 08 - 10:13 PM

A complex like 1960s lingo, or complex like a setup to clear out the house and drive and have everything up and running when he gets there?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 Dec 08 - 10:04 PM

Hmmm....maybe that capsule dug in deeper than planned...he's probably waiting for someone to rescue him, again. Do you suppose he has a complex?




A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 29 Dec 08 - 03:37 PM

Rapaire is encapsulated in a pressurized missle-shaped object right now, hurtling along at 30,000 feet. Or else he's trying to slither up his unplowed driveway in a non-pressurized metal non-missle-shaped object. Let's see how long it takes him to get his pad powered up and the 'puter to turn over and report in.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 29 Dec 08 - 03:19 PM

Yes. ;-)

Say, Rapaire has been insulting Shane in a really terrible manner lately. Well, for years, actually. Isn't it awful? It's not nice to make fun of people whose only retirement plan is to steal someone else's lottery ticket. Poor Shane only wants a free ride! He doesn't even want to have to pay for the ticket. Is that so bad?

You should talk to Rapaire and get him to lighten up on the lad. When he insults Shane he insults all North Ontarians by proxy.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 Dec 08 - 02:47 PM

Indeed, I would be less than a friend if I did not honor your choices in your own life, good Hawk!! Except on the MOAB, of course, where all bets are off. :D


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 29 Dec 08 - 02:03 PM

Fine with me, Amos. ;-)

However, I presently have no desire to spend money on an Iphone, because I simply don't miss not having one. Likewise, I don't miss not having a cellphone. Most of the people around me seem to consider it a necessity.

Part of the reason I don't, I would think, is...I'm single. I don't have a wife or children. If I did, then I can see that there would be strong reasons to carry a cellphone so that my family could get in touch with me when I was out of the house or when they were.

I deliberately chose a more solitary path in life than most people do. Who knows why (shrug), but that is what I chose, and looking back, I can't see that it could have been any other way. I have done what I wanted to do.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 Dec 08 - 01:55 PM

If I were a child, I would, like Tom, be satisfied with a piece of string, a dead rat, and an old apple core. When I was a childe, I was inclined to play with 'most any old thing that came my way.

But when I became a man, I put aside childish things. Dead animals and apple cores go in the recycle bin.

And the iPhone stays in my pocket in case I want to stay connected with those tyo whom I choose to be connected.

Life is a choice. Make it with gusto!


A


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