BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 May 11 - 03:01 PM

Cortisone and lidocaine cocktail. The next thing is an injection of some sort of gel. Then surgery. Then a new knee. Then amputation, a pegleg and a life of piracy on the Portneuf River. Rum-dee-dum and bottle of Yoo-Hoo! or however that pirate thing goes.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 20 May 11 - 02:44 PM

Better the kneecap than the skullcap, I suppose. As long as it wasnt just someone aiming badly!

A

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 20 May 11 - 01:58 PM

I think his kneecap fell off and they needed to inject some superglue to stick it on again.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 20 May 11 - 01:04 PM

Were you in the Corti Zone Rap?

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 20 May 11 - 01:03 PM

Take a shot in the dark.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 20 May 11 - 11:23 AM

Why were you given a shot in the knee?


A

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 20 May 11 - 10:32 AM

I hope you chose one with Scooby-Doo or Spiderman on it.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 May 11 - 09:43 AM

This one was intended for me. They always say you don't hear the one that gets you. I didn't hear this one. The doctor was talking too much. Now my knee hurts and I've got a boo-boo bandage on it.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 20 May 11 - 09:22 AM

I did my quarterly duty for the Red Cross.

Eiseley

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 20 May 11 - 09:15 AM

Rap - the "drools" part rings a bell....*grin*

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 May 11 - 10:52 PM

Some kid bit you and you got a rabies shot, huh?

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 19 May 11 - 10:28 PM

I was shot in the arm today.

Eiseley

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 May 11 - 09:29 PM

I was shot in the knee today.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 19 May 11 - 07:04 PM

I blame a dyslexic brain. :)

Out to dig in the dirt this evening. Still building The Wall.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 19 May 11 - 03:37 PM

With me it's usually my fat head that doesn't correct my fat thumbs.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 19 May 11 - 02:50 PM

you="your". God spare me fat thumbs.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 19 May 11 - 10:28 AM

Because you repressed whacked-out neuroses all point to this being just the sort of thing you would do.


A

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 May 11 - 10:17 AM

Because it's all true? Because I am The Fount Of Truth? Because my every world and thought literally drools with Truth Overflowing?

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 19 May 11 - 08:55 AM

Why do I believe this particular story?

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 May 11 - 07:47 PM

I had a guy in my platoon who used to say that when I tried to awaken him. Every morning it was a fight to get him up. One time when he said it I replied, nicely and lovingly, "You know, Bob, I'm waited for you to offer that and I would REALLY like to do that. But Bob, you should know that I don't like to eat my meat raw." and I tossed a lighted Zippo on his bed.

Never saw someone get up so fast, and never had a bit of trouble thereafter. He KNEW I was nuts.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 18 May 11 - 04:20 PM

Well, no, I wasn't, since you had already pulled out the teeth in question. But since you bring it up, good freynde and Manne of Bookes....eat me.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 May 11 - 02:07 PM

Amos, are you suggesting that we cannibalize our neighbors? On top of all of their other problems? For shame!

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 18 May 11 - 09:53 AM

Your neighbors to the far north-east? That's an interesting problem, and certes, something to sink your teeth into.


A

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 18 May 11 - 09:45 AM

You'll make more if you start selling body parts for transplant. Have a spare kidney?

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 May 11 - 09:31 AM

Well, it's all that I have. I need to sell it to buy a crust of moldy bread so that I can support myself and my wife. Really, I pulled it out with a pair of pliers last night. If I'm very lucky I can get enough to stave off foreclosure for a couple more days so that at least for a tiny while longer we won't be thrown out in the blizzard with our few miserable possessions while the landlord tears down the house so we can't move back in, like happened to our neighbors in the picture.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 17 May 11 - 11:34 PM

Both the tooth and the library foundation give me a sinking feeling.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 May 11 - 10:07 PM

Nah. A dentist took is out maybe 8 or 9 years ago. It had been part of me for about 20 years, but I'm not that attached to it anymore, especially since it was replaced by newer dental work.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 17 May 11 - 09:47 PM

Well, jeeze, man; ya trying to discourage all the groupies? Or were you planning to replace it with a plastic one?

A

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 May 11 - 09:15 PM

Well, I've decided that it's time I sold my gold tooth.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 17 May 11 - 04:05 PM

For which, of course, they would have to establish a sinking fund...

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 May 11 - 03:38 PM

I think that some politicians would think the best career path for women would be as breeding stock so males and unmarried females can work harder and longer so that the bosses will get richer. Otherwise, librarianship would be an excellent career choice. But ask Eiseley.

As for the concrete, well, this is a secret I found out by accident. The foundation and slab for the public library here (and it's not especially big) were poured without taking the weight of the structure into account. As a result it's sinking into the earth at an average of 0.25 inch per year. The city doesn't want it known because it would be responsible for digging down to bedrock and installing jacks and pillars underneath.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 17 May 11 - 03:08 PM

SRS... a difficult question... it all depends on what's underneath. Usually, a building with a small footprint doesn't have a problem with an even distribution of additional weight regardless of the soil conditions. An uneven distribution can be a problem if the underlying soil conditions are such that bearing capacity is an issue.

Of course, I can't see your place and the surrounding area from here so even an educated guess is ruled out. Perhaps a call to the local building authority or any engineering schools nearby (although, engineers are VERY reluctant to make any comment as they are liable even for verbal "advice" even when given freely) may yield some info about soil conditions. There may even be some info on the net.

In a nutshell, when you build "evenly" on "uneven conditions" or when you "build unevenly" on even conditions, yer going against the first rule of soils engineering.

As for rebar, it can't hurt... except in the wallet if it isn't installed properly and I've seen many a contractor not install it properly. That is, it's not supported properly so that it doesn't stay at the right height in the slab. Anyway, I shant get into too much detail unless you want me to do so.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 17 May 11 - 01:05 PM

LA Times article you might want to take along, Eiseley.

Here I am telling Moonglow she should go to library school and she's preparing to start in the fall. Makes one wonder what will be a viable career path in the near future.

Yes, folks, the house is already a slab and the space is completely contained within the existing slab. My neighbor says it doesn't need the rebar because of that, since it won't be moving anywhere. I do wonder, though, if it will make the house enough heavier to affect anything in the structure?

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 17 May 11 - 12:20 PM

That's a great concrete calculator you found, Stilly.

Today I'm going to speak at the school board meeting on behalf of all the public school librarians who are being laid off as the most irrelevant positions. What are they THINKING?!?!

I wonder if my speech will have any positive effect. I wish I could go in with a great plan to save money and save the libraries as well. What a way to crush young minds---by taking away the librarians!

Eiseley

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 17 May 11 - 12:09 PM

What a gruesome sight. Really, it's like vivid closeups of T-cells chasing leukocytes or whatever it is they eat; or like aliens gleefully disembarking on an invaded earth.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 May 11 - 09:32 PM

Daschunds. Thousands and thousands of daschunds. My friends from the Chicago area were there. During the race one of dogs stopped in the middle, sat up and begged, while another was leading the pack ALMOST to the finish line when it turned around and ran back to the start.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 16 May 11 - 08:31 PM

That would drive the scaleman crazy. How do you tare that up?

Wait... how many dogs did you have first thing this morn?

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 May 11 - 06:34 PM

No, you could have a whole bunch of tiny little dogs.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 16 May 11 - 02:22 PM

It takes a big dog to weigh a ton.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 16 May 11 - 11:50 AM

Let's go down to the lab...and SEE what's on the slab!

I see you tremble with an...tici.................................

















































...PAtion!

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 May 11 - 10:26 AM

6.52 cubic yards is the nominal requirement for 6" deep fill.

It is on a slab. isn't it?

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 May 11 - 12:47 AM

Ma'am, I shore hope yore on a slab and not supported above a basement by beams. That concrete has got some considerable weight to it.

Who you buryin' under it? Anybody we know and despise?

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 16 May 11 - 12:22 AM

Ah ha! Found it here.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 16 May 11 - 12:09 AM

Moonglow drove from here to her house with the check engine light on yesterday. I showed her how to check the oil (we added a little), the transmission fluid, and the coolant level. An oxygen sensor can through that light into a tizzy, and they need an oil change, so I think they need to take it in for the change and a visit to the diagnostic computer.

I need someone to do some math for me - or to go find a calculator. I spoke to a neighbor up the street this evening- seems I'm not the only one who thinks pouring 6" of concrete into this silly "den" in my house is a good idea. Others have done it, or put in sub floors and wood to raise the level to the surrounding floors. My room is 22 x 16 and I need 6" of concrete in the room to fill it. Concrete is going for $78 a cubic yard right now. My simple math would suggest that a cubic yard would fill six square yards of my floor - but I wonder if I'm oversimplifying? Any of you tackle this kind of math before?

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 May 11 - 09:56 PM

I have a secret that takes care of all that: "bidnezz is bidnezz an' luhoove is boolsheet!"

(This is an actual quote from an old Florida cracker who was a client of a law office where a friend worked. She was always polite and cheerful to him, and one day he took her into his confidence and revealed his rule of happy living.)

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 May 11 - 09:29 PM

TWO GRANDchildren? Two? Why, you don't look a day over 87!

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 May 11 - 08:57 PM

SH ealways gonna be eider up or eiderdown, the silly goose. I'm back from LA, Mom where I spent a beautiful weekend entertaining my two (urp) grandchildren, the one year old girl with the incessant grin and the five year old boy with the wisdom of the newly articulate.


A

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 15 May 11 - 08:28 PM

Welcome home, Stilly. My oldest son is getting his driver's permit soon (be warned, Rapparee), and I've had a couple of white-knuckled experiences while in the passenger seat. Thankfully they require many many hours of practice, but I really wish kids had to be older before they drove. Good thing we're only 3 blocks from the high school so he'll never GET to drive to school. It's all the other teenage drivers I worry about also.

Eiseley

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 15 May 11 - 03:25 PM

Eider dat or bark.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 May 11 - 03:06 PM

She wasn't sunning in the driveway when I found her. More like laying in the gutter. Again. Perhaps if we could train that damned duckdog to lick her face every so often....