BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 18 Oct 05 - 06:52 PM

It is too late. The day of judgement has passed, and the Apocolypse is upon us. If you've not noticed, well, that's your fault....

The practical result of which is that all this repenting and behaving is totally useless, and you might as well all go back to having a good time...

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 Oct 05 - 04:08 PM

See? See? Drinking, carousing, womenizing, smoking, gambling, singing, eating -- just a veritable ORGY of wantoness and sinfulness! And Amos is PROUD of it! Yeah, verily, brethren and sistern, his pride goeth before him! (Say "Amen!") He has thrown over the Order of the Golden Globes, sold his pottage for a mess of heritage. Repent, I say unto you, Amos, ree-pent before it is too late! Live wasn't given to you to be enjoyed, but to endure and to cope with! Ree-pent, sinner! (Say "Amen!" again.)

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Charley Noble
Date: 18 Oct 05 - 02:56 PM

Nice song, Amos! What's the tune? Oh, maybe it has something to do with what's still ringing in my head!

Charley Noble who NEVER posts to this damn thread...

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 18 Oct 05 - 02:43 PM

Do tell!

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 18 Oct 05 - 02:18 PM

[sniff] I decline to be roused by idle banter. One little typo, and all I get is grief. They wuz GIFTS, you gidt!

Well, I got hugs from Big Mick, and Max, an' the Skippuh, and Bobert and Lonesome EJ, and a mess o' fine limeys, and a whole bunch of purdy lasses. And even a beer from Bearded Bruce! Ha!

A

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 18 Oct 05 - 01:44 PM

I dunno about the getting wet thing, Rap. The current prediction is for Hurricane Wilma to hook to the northeast, go across the southern part of Florida, and terrorize Tweed. That's a pretty good ways from here and even further from where I'll be on Mobile Bay.

Of course, Wilma is a hurricane and absolute predictability is not a quality one associates with the damned things. Especially if one lives in Florida. Especially if one wishes to continue living in Florida, as opposed to dying in Florida. We will not ignore the lady until she is a warm onshore breeze in Iceland (or whatever other fate befalls her).

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 Oct 05 - 01:24 PM

Amos. He's a gidt. A gidt of the gods.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MOAB
Date: 18 Oct 05 - 01:04 PM

That's sweet, Amos. What the fuck's a gidt?

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 18 Oct 05 - 09:52 AM

Well Mom, here's the dufflebag I brought you back. I didn't have time to pick up a ribbon for it. Lonesome EJ and I barely got to the airport on time to get home.

Mom's Duffel

There's three cans of untouched Guinnes and a dozen cans of stout
I'ld-a brought along the dark rum, but the damn stuff just ran out!
There's a clutch of broken strings to use on over-stuffed trash bags
And half a bag of cookies to for to make yer bottom sag.
But there's lots of smiles and laughter and a million tunes or two
And a pair of wornout Levi's that are wet with autumn dew
And in the bottom of the bag, until we meet again
Are the thoughts and tender wishes of two hundred folkie friends!
They've been dancing on the tables and smoking on the lawn
And inventing sweet new harmonies to swell the sounds of song
They've been roaring drunk and thoughtful, and all things in between
Oh, this Getaway was the richest thing that I have ever seen.
There were brilliant English whistlers and tawdry Yankee whalers,
There were hearts and tarts and hugs enough to satiate a sailor
There were songs from early morning til the rising of the sun
And I came back home exhausted, but I had a lot of fun.
So Mother dear, now I am here, I'll give ya better shrift,
And to prove how much I love ya, I have brought you all these gidts!

Love,


A

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 18 Oct 05 - 09:51 AM

AW, those darned freds came back just when the game was beginning to look interesting.

Me and Billy McGates

Raindrops Keep Falling on my LED
    (okay, that one was cheating)

Sweet Keyboard-mine

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,freds
Date: 18 Oct 05 - 09:08 AM

We have utilized the double helix dioxyribonucleic acid of the one you call "Rapaire" in the creation.

Thank you.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 Oct 05 - 08:53 AM

Gonna get wet this weekend, Bee-Dub?

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 18 Oct 05 - 02:46 AM

Hi, Mom!

I haven't been intentionally ignoring you. It's just been difficult to get this thread to load lately.

Blue Tooth, smiling at me
Nothing but Blue Tooth, do I see...

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 17 Oct 05 - 11:30 PM

They may be worse for the wear.

Amos, I hope there's some cold beer in that cooler also.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Oct 05 - 10:41 PM

Don't worry none, Mom. Getaway's over and I haven't heard that any of the bunch was arrested. Yes, they may still be lying drunk in a gutter, or crawling around some den of dissapation, or hoorahing with harlots, or any of a great number of things. But I don't think that they're in jail. So they should be home soon, assuming that they can stay out of jail.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Oct 05 - 02:27 PM

Our just desserts are just desserts.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 17 Oct 05 - 10:48 AM

Thanks, Rap! Good thing we have a couple of time zones covered here, to trip up interlopers.

Heck with just dessert, Amos had better bring back a cooler filled with nicely packed tasty leftovers for everyone!

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 17 Oct 05 - 09:24 AM

drinking, carousing, singing, telling tales, eating, enjoying   themselves         

What do you think I was doing this weekend then? All of those good ideas! And I went to a wedding ceilidh, and was most impressed with the new dance ( When dancers get married, the group writes them a dance. It's traditional).

Even the small war with downstairs is good. I don't mind if they decide loud music late at night is a good idea. I can step dance on their ceiling....

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Oct 05 - 08:53 AM

Yes, we've done it. Over 9700, and without the help of those who flitted off to Getaway. Getaway, pfah! Nothing but a time where the lazy bums sit around, drinking, carousing, singing, telling tales, eating, enjoying   themselves          while               we                  
stay                            home                           with
Mom.

By jingoes, they'd better bring Mom some dessert back with them!

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Oct 05 - 08:11 AM

succeed in his evil quest!

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Oct 05 - 08:11 AM

shall not

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Oct 05 - 08:11 AM

Ted

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 17 Oct 05 - 04:27 AM

So you'll be back in 30 posts then?

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Paco Rabanne
Date: 17 Oct 05 - 04:10 AM

9696 is the new 6969.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Paco Rabanne
Date: 17 Oct 05 - 04:10 AM

.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 17 Oct 05 - 04:05 AM

Another 2 posts and this thread will look the same upside down as up the right way....

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 16 Oct 05 - 11:17 PM

This morning I stumbled upon an interesting essay that I've been dipping into all day when I have a few minutes. Here's a brief excerpt and a link:

The paper is called Raymond carver's "epiphanic moments"

1. Carver and the Realist Epiphany

Carver's interest in the rhetoric of the sudden illumination is well-known. In his autobiographical sketch "On Writing," he emphasized his indebtedness to a line from a story by Chekhov he reportedly liked so much that he pinned it on the wall beside his writing desk: it reads, "'... and suddenly everything became clear to him."' Carver was intrigued, he said, by the "hint of revelation that's implied" (Fires 23). If the notion of a "hint of revelation" is understood in the romanticist or modernist terms on which recent aesthetics (Beja, Langbaum, Nichols), phenomenologies (Bidney, Patterns), and typologies (Tigges) of literary epiphany tend to focus, it refers to the charging of external reality with a sense of transcendental significance that, on the one hand, makes a text's narrative agent see matters in a radically new light, but that, on the other, cannot be translated into a logical proposition or concept. This "revelation," then, remains at the level of a non-semantic sense of the "whatness of things" and at best branches into multiple meanings.

I think this has practical applications here at the MOAB.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 16 Oct 05 - 11:06 PM

How about a few more:

Strawberry ROM
(or the popular variant "Strawberry RAM")

Gates of Laredo

The Unquiet Drive

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Oct 05 - 06:47 PM

And the seasonal ones:

Joy to the World (the printer works!)
Silent Disk
The Internet is Comin' To Town
Jolly Old Gay Porn Websites
I Heard Mommy Cussin' Billy Gates
All I Want For Christmas Is A PC That Works

or that all time fave rave,

Grandpa's Beard Got Tangled In His Hard Drive.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 16 Oct 05 - 06:19 PM

'Blue screens of death over the band-width...'

'The Wreck of the old '97 (gig hard disc)'

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Oct 05 - 10:31 AM

I also didn't mention "House Of The Rising Sun" or Al Hirt's classic, "Java."

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 16 Oct 05 - 10:21 AM

You've forgotten the all time computer classic

Amazing Gates

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Oct 05 - 10:08 AM

I've been thinking about songs, as well as the classic and already-referred-to Keyboard Good And Greasy. Songs like

1. Bill Gates' Infirmary
2. Where Did You Get That FAT?
3. Icons On My Desktop (Make Me Happy)
4. (This Is The Dawning Of) The Age Of The Wireless
5. Universal Solder
6. All 'Round My Disk
7. The Dying Hard Drive
8. Home Page, Home
9. Firefox, Netscape, And Me
10. Puff, My Drive Has Burned Up

and others.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Oct 05 - 08:50 PM

If you slather up sourdough bread with good butter, you can use it for the best Search Engine ever. Works slicker'n snot, lemme tell ya. Like in that old folksong, Keyboard Good 'n' Greasy.

Oddly enough, my brother just called asking if the 1997-era laptop I sold him had a USB port. I told him he was lucky it had a hard drive.

133 Mhz Hitachi, with Win95 and an external CD drive. He wanted to run the pix from a trail camera on it, so he could just take the computer to the camera (it's for photographing deer for deer season, so far he's only got a picture of his friend Niles bailing hay). I suggested he get a 3-way Dazzle drive and a second SD card for the camera and bring the pix home to his "big" computer.

He liked that idea.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 15 Oct 05 - 04:02 PM

A Loaf! A Loaf! My kingdom for a Loaf!

Hehehe. Talking to myself today, cause everyone's out doin' interesting stuff. Me, I'm just cleaning up around here, putting in laundry, playing with the dogs, running to the post office.

[scuffs shoe in dusty turf] Maybe someone will drift along soon. The excitement is over, the sheriff arrested that guy who was parking overnight in the woods across the street from our house (yeah, like no one would notice a car parked in the woods in a residental neighborhood?). Ho hum. . .

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 15 Oct 05 - 11:45 AM

Add some sweet paprika if you didn't have linguica, correct the other seasonings, and search with toasted sourdough bread slathered in good butter.

What you you be searching for, with your loaf of bread? A spoon?

Sounds like a great recipe.

Right now I'm working on a sort of goulash of my own. I'm defragging a very old laptop, and the screen image of the drive is a mess to behold. This one is being retired from online use. I tried updating the Symantec in the poor thing last night and it nearly ground to a halt under the ponderous program. I uninstalled it this morning and the little machine (about 10 years old) breathed a huge sigh of relief.

It is going the way of the "Old Typewriter," my wonderful reliable little Olivetti that I worked my way through college with. It became a kids toy and I think they finally did it in. My Dad's old 66hz laptop has actually been the favorite of the kids because they use it in their rooms for solitaire and for Word documents (their "big" computer is in the living room). His is great for both of those things and it starts relatively fast because there isn't much else on it any more. Now the Acer will go into a kids' room for solitaire and Word documents. It's a 133hz computer, fast in its day, but a relic now. It was my emergency backup computer. Now we have five computers in the house (my Dad's old Amiga is here also, never been out of the box since I got it out of storage a couple of years ago). My "big" computer is okay using the dialup or the DSL, so if DSL dies, we'll just plug in a phone line. I guess it will be its own backup.

I wonder how it's going for the Getaway folks? Is Amos singing his heart out, or getting himself into trouble as the sole representative of the Golden Globe society?

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Oct 05 - 10:23 AM

Put cans of preseasoned, chopped up tomatoes in a pot (how much of any depends upon the number to feed). Add whatever veggies you might have -- bits of carrots, onions, garlic, cut-up broccoli stems, corn (whole kernel, canned or frozen or fresh), bits of potatoes, whatever. Add sliced linguica sausage if you can, or a mildly spicy anything sausage if you can't (use the kind of sausage in casing, or fry up bulk). Add some pearl barley and let everything kind of cook together for a couple hours (add more liquid if necessary, but keep it covered). Add some sweet paprika if you didn't have linguica, correct the other seasonings, and search with toasted sourdough bread slathered in good butter.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 14 Oct 05 - 06:43 PM

So they're cold and wet? Some nice hot Oatmeal is what they want.
Or a great big thing of scrambled eggs. Those are good in the middle of the night. Last year, 150 of us had them at 4 am, over in Germany. It was a festival, and it seemed a good idea at the time....
Or, if the cold's really got to you, hot chocolate, with a good slug of whiskey in, and nutmeg.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 14 Oct 05 - 03:55 PM

Poor long suffering woman!

Yeah, my kids suffer with garden food also. I'm out of most of it now, but I still have some onions and garlic in baskets in the pantry. It's always nice when I'm getting ready to make something to go get one of MY onions. There are some tomatoes in the freezer.

Our Mudcat friends at the Getaway are probably getting pretty wet this weekend. Maybe Mom ought to whip up some nice veggie soup and deliver it to them.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Oct 05 - 03:35 PM

My mother used to lament in much the same way, Stilly. She'd walk around, wringing her hands and wailing, "Oh, my poor depraved children!"

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Oct 05 - 12:15 PM

Or, Mom, I can heat up a can of corned beef hash, toast up some Wonder Bread, slather it with generic grape jelly and oleomargarine, and make you a glass of Tang. And some good old instant coffee with flavored Coffee Mate. Maybe a Pop Tart, too, so you can get some more fruit. Wadda ya say?

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 14 Oct 05 - 12:13 PM

Depriving them of their daily intake of Plastic, additives and a bunch of stuff you need a science degree and a run-up to pronounce? How Cruel!

Next you'll be making the eat stuff fresh from the garden and other tortures...

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 14 Oct 05 - 10:21 AM

Oh--my children are so deprived! They had none of those wonderous things for breakfast. We had a loaf of homemade whole-wheat bread (baked in time for dinner last night) to gnaw on today. They chose to toast theirs, butter it, and sprinkle it with cinnamon suger.

My poor deprived children, having to eat homemade bread instead of getting that marvelous pre-sliced store-bought bread.

Booo hooo.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Oct 05 - 09:17 AM

Fair day to you, good Mother! Wouldst like a cup of tea upon arising? Perhaps some toast and marmalade to begin, with a brekky of scrambled eggs with oak-smoked salmon from the lochs of Scotland, fried Black Klimt tomatoes, and a touch of freshly made hashbrowns?

Oatmeal from pinhead oats on the side? Brown or Demarara sugar? Heavy cream or milk?

Jamaica Blue Mountain or pure Kona or Kenya AA coffee to finish? Sugar? Cream?

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Oct 05 - 09:55 PM

I have a tie in that plaid, among other plaids.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 13 Oct 05 - 07:51 PM

I wasn't limping, just walking in discomfort. I know all too well, if you change the way you use the muscles in an area to spare an injury, it'll hurt more than the injury sharpish.

I think I met them (the men of the lavender kilts) a few years back. Not sure if I should take it as a compliment...

It was a proper autumn day today. Beautiful, crisp air, amd a sunset that turned the hil orange. Shame it won't last.

Also, you do not wear a sporran whilst Highland dancing. Well, you can, but are unlikely to be able to dance for very long. As for my tartan, it's somewhat purlply, but not lavender.href="http://www.clanlindsay.com/lindsay_modern.htm">My tartan

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Oct 05 - 06:23 PM

Or the Highlanders of the Leaping Sporran.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 13 Oct 05 - 06:21 PM

Or the LLLLSLD (the League of Limping men Laid Low by Scottish Leaping Dances).

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Oct 05 - 06:06 PM

You kinda, you know, mincing along? If so you might meet a whole new class of people -- the Men Of the Lavender Kilts.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 13 Oct 05 - 05:52 PM

You know, in the Westminster Parliment, a member can call a debate by crying "I spy strangers" and pointing if there's anyone but members about. One of those old rules that isn't used much.


BTW, I went to Highland Class. I landed a leap wrong, I think, and now can't walk properly...