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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Rapparee 31 Dec 18 - 03:00 PM
keberoxu 31 Dec 18 - 02:56 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 31 Dec 18 - 12:40 PM
Rapparee 31 Dec 18 - 10:29 AM
Stilly River Sage 31 Dec 18 - 12:29 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 30 Dec 18 - 10:58 PM
Rapparee 30 Dec 18 - 03:35 PM
Stilly River Sage 30 Dec 18 - 10:58 AM
keberoxu 30 Dec 18 - 06:43 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 29 Dec 18 - 12:40 PM
Rapparee 28 Dec 18 - 09:29 PM
Rapparee 27 Dec 18 - 09:02 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 27 Dec 18 - 07:43 PM
Stilly River Sage 27 Dec 18 - 07:29 PM
Rapparee 27 Dec 18 - 06:52 PM
Donuel 27 Dec 18 - 06:33 PM
Donuel 27 Dec 18 - 06:17 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 27 Dec 18 - 05:39 PM
Stilly River Sage 27 Dec 18 - 04:56 PM
Rapparee 26 Dec 18 - 01:42 PM
Stilly River Sage 26 Dec 18 - 12:54 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 26 Dec 18 - 03:21 AM
Stilly River Sage 26 Dec 18 - 12:35 AM
Rapparee 25 Dec 18 - 10:15 PM
keberoxu 25 Dec 18 - 08:43 PM
Rapparee 25 Dec 18 - 12:22 PM
keberoxu 24 Dec 18 - 09:54 PM
Rapparee 24 Dec 18 - 08:20 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 24 Dec 18 - 05:00 PM
keberoxu 24 Dec 18 - 11:23 AM
Rapparee 24 Dec 18 - 11:04 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 24 Dec 18 - 12:43 AM
Rapparee 23 Dec 18 - 08:35 PM
Rapparee 22 Dec 18 - 10:00 PM
keberoxu 22 Dec 18 - 07:00 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 21 Dec 18 - 09:45 PM
Rapparee 21 Dec 18 - 08:55 PM
Donuel 21 Dec 18 - 06:54 AM
Rapparee 20 Dec 18 - 08:49 PM
Donuel 20 Dec 18 - 05:25 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 20 Dec 18 - 11:21 AM
Stilly River Sage 20 Dec 18 - 10:40 AM
Rapparee 20 Dec 18 - 09:52 AM
Donuel 19 Dec 18 - 10:33 PM
Donuel 19 Dec 18 - 10:00 PM
Stilly River Sage 19 Dec 18 - 09:47 PM
Little Hawk 19 Dec 18 - 09:38 PM
Donuel 19 Dec 18 - 09:03 PM
Rapparee 19 Dec 18 - 08:14 PM
Rapparee 19 Dec 18 - 05:14 PM

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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 Dec 18 - 03:00 PM

My wife is a quilter and makes great quilt blocks. Does that make her a piece maker or a block head?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 31 Dec 18 - 02:56 PM

just because Rapparee wields a pike,
does that make him a piker ?

Or merely a pike-wielder ...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 31 Dec 18 - 12:40 PM

Please do not delude yourself that my preparation of orzo soup is in any way an indication of sophistication on my part. The orzo was from the half-price discontinued items bin at the local grocery store. It was cheap. I had never heard of the stuff, but it looked like rice so I figured it could be used in soup.

The store at which I bought it is one of a regional chain of ten or so stores. Most of them are in affluent neighborhoods, but "our" store is the poor country cousin out in the middle of cotton and peanut farming country.   When the chain's management decides to try a new item, a carton automatically goes to all stores, whether they want it or not. That's how organic orzo gets to a store where nobody's ever heard of the stuff. So, it sits on the shelf for a while, and then gets tossed into the bargain bin for cheapskates like me to buy.

"What's this? Hell, I don't know, but it's cheap. Buy it. If you don't like it, feed it to the dog. She'll eat anything."

But, having discovered orzo, I do like it and imagine it will become a regular purchase, albeit from a different store. And it makes me feel all sophisticated and Whole Foodsish.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 Dec 18 - 10:29 AM

Orzo. Orzoite is a very high explosive that is shaped like orzo.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 31 Dec 18 - 12:29 AM

You know what "orzo" means in whatever language it comes from (my Lebanese friend introduced me to it) - it means - wait for it - "Rice." Rice shaped pasta. Yup.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 30 Dec 18 - 10:58 PM

Hi, Mom!

I bought some orzo and made soup tonight. That's "orzo" with an "r", not "ouzo" with a "u", you drunken old heifer. Orzo is pasta that looks like really big grains of rice. You eat it. You don't drink it. Did I mention the drunken old heifer thing?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Dec 18 - 03:35 PM

Yes, it will be, and I was much grieved to have to start that post Upstairs, Above The Salt.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 30 Dec 18 - 10:58 AM

MOM's feeling a little lethargic and the terrible loss of MMario. I know he visited here a few times over the years. He cast a large shadow (that had nothing to do with his shape) that will be missed.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 30 Dec 18 - 06:43 AM

well, it's early in the morning,
time for MOM to get upstairs . . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 29 Dec 18 - 12:40 PM

Hi, Mom! We got a phone call this morning from Mercedes-Benz congratulating us on the purchase of our new car! We thanked them for the phone call and then explained that we don't have a new car of any kind, much less a Mercedes.

Turned out that our son had put his mom's phone number on the paperwork for the Mercedes he had just bought for his wife. (You know... Nobody knows anyone's phone number anymore... Tapped the wrong contact name...)

Too bad. We were hoping the car might still be in the back of Santa's sleigh and that he was just running late.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Dec 18 - 09:29 PM

Mom was drinking liquid steak again. You know: half and half spiced rum and Worcestershire sauce.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Dec 18 - 09:02 PM

So will this. Get two and send me one.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 27 Dec 18 - 07:43 PM

Sure, I could make my own eggnog. I could make my own butter, cheese and yogurt too if I had to. But I don't. A vile capitalist dairy products magnate makes them for me. Well, I don't want to have to make my own eggnog either. I want a capitalist to make it!

Anyway, the cookies, cakes, pies and candies left from Christmas seem to help with the cravings.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 27 Dec 18 - 07:29 PM

Looks like a good recipe - AND - you can buy extra when it's available and freeze the cartons. There is something in the store eggnog that disagrees with me. A preservative or stabilizer has probably been added. I can drink the homemade variety (a thin custard) with no problem.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Dec 18 - 06:52 PM

6 large egg yolks
1/2 cup granulated sugar
1 cup heavy whipping cream
2 cups milk
1/2 teaspoon ground nutmeg
pinch of salt
1/4 teaspoon vanilla extract
ground cinnamon, for topping, if you want

Instructions

Whisk the egg yolks and sugar together in a medium bowl until light and creamy.

In a saucepan over medium-high heat, combine the cream, milk, nutmeg and salt. Stir often until mixture reaches a bare simmer.

Add a big spoonful of the hot milk to the egg mixture, whisking vigorously. Repeat, adding a big spoonful at a time, to temper the eggs.

Once most of the hot milk has been added to the eggs, pour the mixture back into the saucepan on the stove.

Whisk constantly for just a few minutes, until the mixture is just slightly thickened (or until it reaches about 160 degrees F on a thermometer). It will thicken more as it cools.

Remove from heat and stir in the vanilla.

Pour the eggnog into a pitcher or other container and cover with plastic wrap.

Baptize with the juice of the barley, corn, or other juice. My great-uncle would top it with meringue made from the egg whites.

Refrigerate until chilled. It will thicken as it cools.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 27 Dec 18 - 06:33 PM

I learned today that Rap is a piker.
Rapparees or raparees (from the Irish ropairí, plural of ropaire, meaning half-pike or pike-wielding person) were Irish guerrilla fighters who operated on the Jacobite side during the 1690s Williamite war in Ireland.
It seems he is still sore about the battle of Culloden and the freak stroke that Bonnie Prince Charlie suffered. Sorry Charlie.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 27 Dec 18 - 06:17 PM

I too have seen an egg nog shortage/disappearance.

It can't be caused by an egg shortage so it must be the nog, what ever that is.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 27 Dec 18 - 05:39 PM

Mom! I'm going through eggnog withdrawal! I visited four supermarkets today, even a couple I've sworn in the past that I'd never set foot in again, and not a carton of eggnog in sight!

Now, I understand that eggnog is a seasonal specialty, so I don't expect to be able to buy it year-round. But why do supermarkets carry it from a week before Thanksgiving until precisely Christmas Day and then, BAM!, no more? They get us addicted to the stuff and then force us to quit cold turkey! Couldn't they at least keep a few cartons on hand through New Years Day so we can taper off? Obviously, the people who decide when to make and sell the stuff have never experienced eggnog DTs!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 27 Dec 18 - 04:56 PM

If Max didn't have the page set up on a three-day view MOM would have fallen off earlier today. Upsy-daisy!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Dec 18 - 01:42 PM

Mom cooked up Kraft Macaroni and Cheese with chunked up hot dogs in it for Christmas dinner.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 26 Dec 18 - 12:54 PM

Cooking up a storm results in a sea of dirty dishes and a few tempests in teapots as technique is debated by participating cooks (of whom there are too many in the kitchen.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 26 Dec 18 - 03:21 AM

How does one cook up a storm? I'm thinking stir frying in a wok with a few dashes of toasted sesame oil would be a good option. Or stewing in a Dutch oven with some carrots and onions. I don't think I'd try cooking a storm in any sort of open pan. A storm escaping from an uncovered skillet can probably make a wreck out of the kitchen. And what do you do with the leftovers?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 26 Dec 18 - 12:35 AM

We cooked up a storm here and will do so again on the weekend when we can manage to get both kids together at the same time. MOMs of the world have done a lot of cooking this week.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Dec 18 - 10:15 PM

Irregardless of Their whims of world domination, we enjoyed a lovely Christmas dinner of broiled filet mignon, Yorkshire pudding, and English toffee ice cream with Ghiradelli's dark chocolate sauce. Pat went to help at the Mosque, serving Christmas dinner to whoever wanted to come (someone brought a ham to share!).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 25 Dec 18 - 08:43 PM

While Rapparee is watching the satellites,
let's get MOM upward again.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Dec 18 - 12:22 PM

More coming...NORAD is slow on reporting this.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 24 Dec 18 - 09:54 PM

Father Christmas had to take the train?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Dec 18 - 08:20 PM

While there is not yet photographic evidence, NORAD and satellite reports state that a sleigh and eight reindeer were shot down by "a beam weapon from space" as the sleigh passed over Oulu, Siberia fifteen minutes ago. More as this story develops.

                                  --UPI, AP, Fox, CBC, RT, Pravda


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 24 Dec 18 - 05:00 PM

A queue? We don't have queues in Floribama. We have lines. Tell folks around here to "Form a queue" and they'll say, "What? A cue? We ain't shootin' pool. We're buyin' lottery tickets! You ain't from around here, are ya?"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 24 Dec 18 - 11:23 AM

It's Christmas eve, let's move to the top of the queue.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Dec 18 - 11:04 AM

I report only the label. I sure as heck ain't gonna drink any of it! Last time I did anything like that I woke up in an alley without my wallet, watch, Bic pen, and underwear (my outer clothing was undisturbed).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 24 Dec 18 - 12:43 AM

Oh no! That wasn't really Everclear! It was some of Zeke's latest batch of moonshine! He puts it up in old Everclear bottles so it'll look legit if the ATF agents come calling. Zeke's 'shine is 95% alcohol, just like Everclear, but the other 5% sure ain't water. It might be anything from A to Z. Like acetone or Zippo lighter fluid.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Dec 18 - 08:35 PM

Mom has slipped out her bedroom window! Somewhere she's found a bottle of Everclear! and she's stark nekkid chasing squirrels around the back 40! Something Must Be Done!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Dec 18 - 10:00 PM

Yes, she's still sobering up.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 22 Dec 18 - 07:00 PM

Just in time, all that was,
for the winter solstice.
Which I presume MOM weathered the way she usually has?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 21 Dec 18 - 09:45 PM

That's not a sign of Vorgon power! It's just a Sun Dog.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Dec 18 - 08:55 PM

A sign of Their power!!

Beautiful in its terrible aspect!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 21 Dec 18 - 06:54 AM

Them is classified. shh


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Dec 18 - 08:49 PM

Those are merely pawns of Them.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 20 Dec 18 - 05:25 PM

I hear that their face gills are extremely sensitive. If touched they are exquisitely erotically ecstatically orgasmic to them but they are also a liability if punched in the face. Earthlings know how to take a punch. Hands down we would prevail in hand to hand combat. Unfortunately they have a disintegration gun similar to 'Mars Attacks'.

On the other hand a Vogon can not be tickled.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 20 Dec 18 - 11:21 AM

Judging by the link Donuel provided, the difference in appearance between a Vorgon male and a Vorgon female is that males are ugly while females are ugly.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 20 Dec 18 - 10:40 AM

Stillaguamish.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Dec 18 - 09:52 AM

They control your races. They want to control Earth, the sole barrier to Their galactic domination.

It was a shame to lose the Patrol Ship, but now we know where They are hiding.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 19 Dec 18 - 10:33 PM

Vogons

Vorgon


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 19 Dec 18 - 10:00 PM

So it IS Sage in the wise sense and not the herb,
and River means time and Stilly means...somewhat still.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 19 Dec 18 - 09:47 PM

Not with the state department, with the Library department. (The library, in fact, that houses one of the largest collections to do with the U.S. Mexico War, except I think the online exhibit page is broken right now because they keep losing the librarians who knew how to run it. That's what happens when you don't treat them well.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 19 Dec 18 - 09:38 PM

That is a very impressive looking death ray.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 19 Dec 18 - 09:03 PM

Indeed the disintegration ray is an X ray through Gamma ray narrow beam weapon capable of carving out 4 mile deep canyons. However the vector analysis proves it is aimed nowhere near Earth. For my money I would guess it is merely target practice by the Vogorn, not to be confused with the Vogons. -sigh of relief-

We could have had a disintegration beam too for the cost of an annual supply of new executive golf carts but the budget was cut.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Dec 18 - 08:14 PM

AUX ARMES, MES AMIS! AUX BARRICADES!!

The destruction of one of our patrol ships has been caught on a static photo. This was the PS Mills Darden, destroyed by a polychromic disintegration ray fired from one of Their vessels orbiting Farout.

Earth is under attack.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Dec 18 - 05:14 PM

K, I don't have them yet -- I see the doc tomorrow afternoon.

D, if I could lick that wound a) I wouldn't and, b) I'd be a helluva a contortionist.


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