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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Bee-dubya-ell 06 Jan 19 - 08:39 PM
Rapparee 06 Jan 19 - 08:16 PM
keberoxu 06 Jan 19 - 06:43 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 06 Jan 19 - 06:30 PM
Rapparee 06 Jan 19 - 02:24 PM
Stilly River Sage 06 Jan 19 - 12:58 PM
Donuel 06 Jan 19 - 10:54 AM
Donuel 06 Jan 19 - 10:36 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 05 Jan 19 - 07:12 PM
keberoxu 05 Jan 19 - 06:25 PM
Stilly River Sage 05 Jan 19 - 11:29 AM
keberoxu 05 Jan 19 - 09:06 AM
Donuel 05 Jan 19 - 08:19 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 04 Jan 19 - 11:58 PM
Rapparee 04 Jan 19 - 09:47 PM
Donuel 04 Jan 19 - 03:05 PM
keberoxu 04 Jan 19 - 01:46 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 03 Jan 19 - 09:01 PM
Donuel 03 Jan 19 - 02:11 PM
keberoxu 03 Jan 19 - 12:31 PM
Donuel 03 Jan 19 - 12:27 PM
Rapparee 02 Jan 19 - 08:24 PM
Donuel 02 Jan 19 - 03:47 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 02 Jan 19 - 02:10 PM
Donuel 02 Jan 19 - 01:26 PM
keberoxu 02 Jan 19 - 11:49 AM
Rapparee 01 Jan 19 - 05:53 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 01 Jan 19 - 08:43 AM
Stilly River Sage 31 Dec 18 - 11:14 PM
Rapparee 31 Dec 18 - 03:00 PM
keberoxu 31 Dec 18 - 02:56 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 31 Dec 18 - 12:40 PM
Rapparee 31 Dec 18 - 10:29 AM
Stilly River Sage 31 Dec 18 - 12:29 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 30 Dec 18 - 10:58 PM
Rapparee 30 Dec 18 - 03:35 PM
Stilly River Sage 30 Dec 18 - 10:58 AM
keberoxu 30 Dec 18 - 06:43 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 29 Dec 18 - 12:40 PM
Rapparee 28 Dec 18 - 09:29 PM
Rapparee 27 Dec 18 - 09:02 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 27 Dec 18 - 07:43 PM
Stilly River Sage 27 Dec 18 - 07:29 PM
Rapparee 27 Dec 18 - 06:52 PM
Donuel 27 Dec 18 - 06:33 PM
Donuel 27 Dec 18 - 06:17 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 27 Dec 18 - 05:39 PM
Stilly River Sage 27 Dec 18 - 04:56 PM
Rapparee 26 Dec 18 - 01:42 PM
Stilly River Sage 26 Dec 18 - 12:54 PM

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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 06 Jan 19 - 08:39 PM

Buzzard shit is toxic to vegetation. So, if buzzards roost in the same place year after year, it will eventually become a sterile treeless plain and, therefore, no longer suitable for buzzard roosting. "Buzzards' Roost" will have to change its name to "Where Buzzards Used to Roost".


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Jan 19 - 08:16 PM

There's a place out here called "Buzzard's Roost." Not a tree in sight, but I understand that some folks used to put out buzzard food there when they got fed up with other people.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 06 Jan 19 - 06:43 PM

"...he was not happy to not enjoy drinking any more."
Double-negatives make for treacherous English!
The preceding sounds different to me than
"...having said I don't like drinking ... "

but it wouldn't be the first time I got it wrong myself.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 06 Jan 19 - 06:30 PM

No, the tree I was burning was not the one the vultures were in. The buzzard tree is on a neighbor's property. The tree I was burning was on my property, on the ground, and chopped up into burn-sized bits. It was struck by lighting about four years ago and had already lost all its limbs, so buzzards wouldn't have had anything to roost on if they'd wanted to.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Jan 19 - 02:24 PM

Stilly, is something going on with Amos we don't know?

Donuel, I don't remember ever having said I don't like drinking alcohol. I don't do nearly as much of it now as I have in the past, but I do enjoy a drink now and then.

Bee-Dub, if you're burning the tree the vultures are in they will most certainly leave. And jettisoning poop is a vagus nerve reaction in many animals, including humans: "soiling" one's clothes is a common reaction to first-time combat or any great hurt or fear. Yes, it is thought by those who think about such things as why people poop their pants to be jettisoning unnecessary weight and baggage, part of the flight or fight reaction.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 06 Jan 19 - 12:58 PM

I fear Amos won't be joining us again at MOM's house; a while back he had me send him a bunch of poems he posted here, then remove them (they're still there, just hidden) so he could publish them. I'm thinking a future project will be to assemble them for his family, if they don't find copies there on his computer. It means loading the entire thread and then using a magic moderator button to reveal the deleted posts. Oy.

Okay, back to our nonsense. I haven't had vultures poop on my head but one day I was working in the garden and all of a sudden the driveway and garden (with me in it) were pelted with white, and I quick got a photo of the birds way overhead. It turned out to be brown pelicans, though why they all chose that moment and from such a great height is a real head-scratcher.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 06 Jan 19 - 10:54 AM

This is by no means a cure for alcoholism. It is alternative fun.
(current laws not withstanding)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 06 Jan 19 - 10:36 AM

Rap recently said he was not happy to not enjoy drinking any more.
Now if there was a healthy alternative like a real life synthehol there would be great benefits.
Flavor is not an obstacle because heat and dozens of flavours and hops are available.

The negative effects of alcohol is by passed with my recipe, such as fights, hangovers, toxic livers and incapacitation.

Ingredients primarily include minute levels of oxytocin, ecstasy, muscle relaxant and THC. The exact recipe is proprietary. This idea came to me all at once this morning and is more complex than it sounds,
this is not a THC based drink/cocktail/ale as much as it is a friend enhancer.

The obvious protestation over fake compared to the real thing would be overcome by the experience. I consider this a real life saver


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 05 Jan 19 - 07:12 PM

Yes, vulture poop is not a pleasant thing to have rained down upon one's head. And if you should ever spook a roosting flock by, say, walking out your front door when a bunch of them have decided to roost in that pine tree in your yard (yes, I speak from firsthand experience), pooping is exactly what they'll do. I suppose it's a fright response. It's like their little vulture brains tell them to jettison as much excess weight as possible so they can fly away faster. And the sound of an entire flock taking flight at once is like thunder.

Unfortunately, the flock that's been roosting nearby seems to have moved to more putrid pastures. It could be because I was burning the sawed up remains of a lightning-struck tree today. I imagine vultures are spooked by smoke. They aren't smart enough to know the difference between a small controlled fire and one that's going to set their feathers afire. They just smell smoke and go the other way.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 05 Jan 19 - 06:25 PM

I cannot remember where I encountered the collection of
Bloopers committed by Translators from one language to another,
but there was one blooper it is not possible to forget.

"The cows have come home to roost with a vengeance."

(did the trees fall in the act?)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 05 Jan 19 - 11:29 AM

There is a group of usually four turkey vultures who work the street cleanup crew here in my village. I have photos of them working on the local red squirrels that can not be resuscitated after being hit by cars.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 05 Jan 19 - 09:06 AM

When the turkey vultures come home to roost,
tarry not beneath the trees.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 05 Jan 19 - 08:19 AM

Rumpty Trumpty

No one could fix this shattered man
to learn or help him understand
Now his shut down has prevented all
rescue when he fell from his wall.



Duck! more cursory rhymes are coming.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 04 Jan 19 - 11:58 PM

Hi, Mom!

We have a big flock of turkey vultures (aka buzzards) roosting in some pine trees a hundred yards or so from our house. Must be fifty of them. Most of them go off to hunt during the day, but they all come back to the roost an hour or so before sunset and soar around for a while before settling down for the evening. We see vultures all the time, but usually well up in the sky. Having dozens flying at treetop level right over our house is something else entirely.

Sometimes they come in pretty low and the dog tries to chase them. She doesn't really understand the "Dogs can't fly!" thing.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Jan 19 - 09:47 PM

I'd like a sgian dubh, I think. Nothing fancy. Or perhaps a sgian achlais. Maybe Mom will get me one for my birthday.


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Subject: Whats Mom of all BS like where you are?
From: Donuel
Date: 04 Jan 19 - 03:05 PM

The wolf won't bite you. In fact weather is at the bottom of the list of things that can hurt/kill you. But if you are concerned about weather alone, #1 is heat, #2 flood.

The most frequent cause of death you can google for yourself but its not good for anxiety disorders. Homicide is #2 for pregnant women and #5 for women 18 to 44.
Suicide in the military is #2
#1 military deaths are 'unintended injuries'


The #1 antidote for malefactor and medical issues is the Mother of BS threads


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 04 Jan 19 - 01:46 PM

moreover, they are saying that the supermoon is a Wolf Moon according to the lunar calendar of the First Nation/Native Americans.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 03 Jan 19 - 09:01 PM

Yes, if it smells like ranch dressing, throw it out. Unless the label on the bottle says "Ranch Dressing". In that case, wait until it smells like blue cheese dressing, and then throw it out. If the label says"Blue Cheese Dressing", there's no applicable smell test. Just look for anything orange growing in it. After all, it's not called orange cheese dressing.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 03 Jan 19 - 02:11 PM

Meanwhile back at the ranch dressing factory breakroom refrigerator,
"hey Ralph do ya suppose this box of Chinese food is still good?"
What does it smell like?
"Ranch Dressing"
throw it out!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 03 Jan 19 - 12:31 PM

In the meantime we are mere weeks away from a Super Blood Moon.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 03 Jan 19 - 12:27 PM

Maybe good swimmers are over rated and do not enhance evolution at conception. The strangest part of the journey is swimming out of the fallopian tube into the void to seek conjunction with a spinning egg that could take many labyrinthine paths.

Cloning is the only real short cut. But does it have its own medical code?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Jan 19 - 08:24 PM

Good heavens, Bee Dub! I didn't realize what you were trying to tell us, using that medical procedures code! You...you...had this done, I assume? Did it take? When is your birth day?

Preferred Name         

Artificial insemination; intra-cervical
Synonyms         

ARTIFICIAL INSEMINATION INTRA-CERVICAL
ID         

http://purl.bioontology.org/ontology/CPT/58321
ADDITIONAL GUIDELINE         

001: (For artificial insemination, see 58321, 58322)
altLabel         

ARTIFICIAL INSEMINATION INTRA-CERVICAL

Injection of semen into cervix

Intracervical artificial insemination

CPT LEVEL         

PC
CPTLINK CONCEPT ID         

1008855
cui         

C0372601
Date created         

19940101
Do not code with         

Irrigation of implanted venous access device for drug delivery systems
Inverse of SIB         

Artificial insemination; intra-uterine
notation         

58321
prefLabel         

Artificial insemination; intra-cervical
REPORTABLE         

T
RVU FACILITY PRACTICE EXPENSE         

0.36
RVU MEDICARE GLOBAL PERIOD         

000
RVU NONFACILITY PRACTICE EXPENSE         

1.15
RVU PLI         

0.11
RVU total facility         

1.39
RVU TOTAL NONFACILITY         

2.18
RVU work         

0.92
Specialty         

207V00000X/Obstetrics & Gynecology/100%
tui         

T061
subClassOf         

Artificial insemination


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 02 Jan 19 - 03:47 PM

BWL After I was exploring for hours with my Google pro earth app in an area north of the Black Sea, I found your post had a unique virtual omni-intrigue. I'm resigned to simply get down to Earth this invisible new year. I am surprised how far I got in street level mode driving from the Russian red neck Riviera to more secret installations to the Northwest.

I also did a virtual sea voyage from the Azov Sea to the Marmara Sea. I seem to have passed over a underwater railway tunnel where the Azmov empties into the Black Sea.

My next search will be the Siberian Traps.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 02 Jan 19 - 02:10 PM

This is post #58321. If you have the correct key to decode it, there's an important coded message hidden in that number. If you don't have the correct key, it means squat. I don't have the correct key, so I have no idea what it means. But, given that there are over six billion people on this planet alone, and an infinity of other habitable planets in the universe, someone has to have it. You just need to find that person (or other sentient entity) and beat the information out of him/her/it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 02 Jan 19 - 01:26 PM

You know a couple of shots of Ouzo
and mandarin orange juice or so
makes a nice marinade for your Orzo.
The stronger the flavor the better.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 02 Jan 19 - 11:49 AM

Up we go, MOM.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Jan 19 - 05:53 PM

Remember, Bee-Dub: this is as young as you'll ever get.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 01 Jan 19 - 08:43 AM

Happy New Year, Mom!

Here's something to ponder: The "Happy New Year" greeting is unique in that it doesn't refer to a single day, but to a span of time. All other holiday greetings ("Merry Christmas", "Happy Valentine's Day", etc.) have a shelf-life of 24 hours. But "Happy New Year" is good for an entire year!

But is that really true? When does the year stop being the "new" year and just become the plain old year? If one has a great January and February an then life turns to shit in March, has one had a happy new year? After all, the undeniably "new" portion was fantastic. It's the not-so-new part that's gonna suck.

Personally, I think the current year will no longer be new when writing the date as 2019 instead of 2018 becomes automatic. At that point, it's just the year. Nothing new about it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 31 Dec 18 - 11:14 PM

When I'm fixing rice (I prefer basmati these days but you can do it with any of them) I put a little olive oil in a small skillet and when it's hot add about 1/4 cup of orzo and stir it around at medium high until it smells toasted and is a little brown. 3/4 cup of rice goes into the rice cooker with the right amount of water for a full cup of rice, and the orzo is added to it (you can also add the rice to the orzo after it has browned and toast the rice a little before adding to water). This gives you rice with the lovely accent of browned orzo. The middle eastern restaurants I go to do something very similar using vermicelli added to the rice. And if you grew up in the 1960s you remember the ads for "Rice a Roni, the San Francisco treat." Yup. Same thing, but rice, pasta, and a bouillon cube.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 Dec 18 - 03:00 PM

My wife is a quilter and makes great quilt blocks. Does that make her a piece maker or a block head?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 31 Dec 18 - 02:56 PM

just because Rapparee wields a pike,
does that make him a piker ?

Or merely a pike-wielder ...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 31 Dec 18 - 12:40 PM

Please do not delude yourself that my preparation of orzo soup is in any way an indication of sophistication on my part. The orzo was from the half-price discontinued items bin at the local grocery store. It was cheap. I had never heard of the stuff, but it looked like rice so I figured it could be used in soup.

The store at which I bought it is one of a regional chain of ten or so stores. Most of them are in affluent neighborhoods, but "our" store is the poor country cousin out in the middle of cotton and peanut farming country.   When the chain's management decides to try a new item, a carton automatically goes to all stores, whether they want it or not. That's how organic orzo gets to a store where nobody's ever heard of the stuff. So, it sits on the shelf for a while, and then gets tossed into the bargain bin for cheapskates like me to buy.

"What's this? Hell, I don't know, but it's cheap. Buy it. If you don't like it, feed it to the dog. She'll eat anything."

But, having discovered orzo, I do like it and imagine it will become a regular purchase, albeit from a different store. And it makes me feel all sophisticated and Whole Foodsish.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 Dec 18 - 10:29 AM

Orzo. Orzoite is a very high explosive that is shaped like orzo.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 31 Dec 18 - 12:29 AM

You know what "orzo" means in whatever language it comes from (my Lebanese friend introduced me to it) - it means - wait for it - "Rice." Rice shaped pasta. Yup.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 30 Dec 18 - 10:58 PM

Hi, Mom!

I bought some orzo and made soup tonight. That's "orzo" with an "r", not "ouzo" with a "u", you drunken old heifer. Orzo is pasta that looks like really big grains of rice. You eat it. You don't drink it. Did I mention the drunken old heifer thing?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Dec 18 - 03:35 PM

Yes, it will be, and I was much grieved to have to start that post Upstairs, Above The Salt.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 30 Dec 18 - 10:58 AM

MOM's feeling a little lethargic and the terrible loss of MMario. I know he visited here a few times over the years. He cast a large shadow (that had nothing to do with his shape) that will be missed.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 30 Dec 18 - 06:43 AM

well, it's early in the morning,
time for MOM to get upstairs . . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 29 Dec 18 - 12:40 PM

Hi, Mom! We got a phone call this morning from Mercedes-Benz congratulating us on the purchase of our new car! We thanked them for the phone call and then explained that we don't have a new car of any kind, much less a Mercedes.

Turned out that our son had put his mom's phone number on the paperwork for the Mercedes he had just bought for his wife. (You know... Nobody knows anyone's phone number anymore... Tapped the wrong contact name...)

Too bad. We were hoping the car might still be in the back of Santa's sleigh and that he was just running late.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Dec 18 - 09:29 PM

Mom was drinking liquid steak again. You know: half and half spiced rum and Worcestershire sauce.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Dec 18 - 09:02 PM

So will this. Get two and send me one.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 27 Dec 18 - 07:43 PM

Sure, I could make my own eggnog. I could make my own butter, cheese and yogurt too if I had to. But I don't. A vile capitalist dairy products magnate makes them for me. Well, I don't want to have to make my own eggnog either. I want a capitalist to make it!

Anyway, the cookies, cakes, pies and candies left from Christmas seem to help with the cravings.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 27 Dec 18 - 07:29 PM

Looks like a good recipe - AND - you can buy extra when it's available and freeze the cartons. There is something in the store eggnog that disagrees with me. A preservative or stabilizer has probably been added. I can drink the homemade variety (a thin custard) with no problem.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Dec 18 - 06:52 PM

6 large egg yolks
1/2 cup granulated sugar
1 cup heavy whipping cream
2 cups milk
1/2 teaspoon ground nutmeg
pinch of salt
1/4 teaspoon vanilla extract
ground cinnamon, for topping, if you want

Instructions

Whisk the egg yolks and sugar together in a medium bowl until light and creamy.

In a saucepan over medium-high heat, combine the cream, milk, nutmeg and salt. Stir often until mixture reaches a bare simmer.

Add a big spoonful of the hot milk to the egg mixture, whisking vigorously. Repeat, adding a big spoonful at a time, to temper the eggs.

Once most of the hot milk has been added to the eggs, pour the mixture back into the saucepan on the stove.

Whisk constantly for just a few minutes, until the mixture is just slightly thickened (or until it reaches about 160 degrees F on a thermometer). It will thicken more as it cools.

Remove from heat and stir in the vanilla.

Pour the eggnog into a pitcher or other container and cover with plastic wrap.

Baptize with the juice of the barley, corn, or other juice. My great-uncle would top it with meringue made from the egg whites.

Refrigerate until chilled. It will thicken as it cools.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 27 Dec 18 - 06:33 PM

I learned today that Rap is a piker.
Rapparees or raparees (from the Irish ropairí, plural of ropaire, meaning half-pike or pike-wielding person) were Irish guerrilla fighters who operated on the Jacobite side during the 1690s Williamite war in Ireland.
It seems he is still sore about the battle of Culloden and the freak stroke that Bonnie Prince Charlie suffered. Sorry Charlie.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 27 Dec 18 - 06:17 PM

I too have seen an egg nog shortage/disappearance.

It can't be caused by an egg shortage so it must be the nog, what ever that is.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 27 Dec 18 - 05:39 PM

Mom! I'm going through eggnog withdrawal! I visited four supermarkets today, even a couple I've sworn in the past that I'd never set foot in again, and not a carton of eggnog in sight!

Now, I understand that eggnog is a seasonal specialty, so I don't expect to be able to buy it year-round. But why do supermarkets carry it from a week before Thanksgiving until precisely Christmas Day and then, BAM!, no more? They get us addicted to the stuff and then force us to quit cold turkey! Couldn't they at least keep a few cartons on hand through New Years Day so we can taper off? Obviously, the people who decide when to make and sell the stuff have never experienced eggnog DTs!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 27 Dec 18 - 04:56 PM

If Max didn't have the page set up on a three-day view MOM would have fallen off earlier today. Upsy-daisy!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Dec 18 - 01:42 PM

Mom cooked up Kraft Macaroni and Cheese with chunked up hot dogs in it for Christmas dinner.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 26 Dec 18 - 12:54 PM

Cooking up a storm results in a sea of dirty dishes and a few tempests in teapots as technique is debated by participating cooks (of whom there are too many in the kitchen.)


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