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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Eiseley 05 Apr 11 - 09:12 AM
Little Hawk 05 Apr 11 - 01:21 AM
Amos 04 Apr 11 - 11:26 PM
Acme 04 Apr 11 - 10:48 PM
Rapparee 04 Apr 11 - 10:43 PM
Janie 04 Apr 11 - 10:23 PM
Rapparee 04 Apr 11 - 10:13 PM
Amos 04 Apr 11 - 08:34 PM
Janie 04 Apr 11 - 08:13 PM
Acme 04 Apr 11 - 04:35 PM
gnu 04 Apr 11 - 04:06 PM
Little Hawk 04 Apr 11 - 02:45 PM
Amos 04 Apr 11 - 02:23 PM
Acme 04 Apr 11 - 01:38 PM
Little Hawk 04 Apr 11 - 12:49 PM
Amos 04 Apr 11 - 10:29 AM
Rapparee 04 Apr 11 - 10:18 AM
Little Hawk 04 Apr 11 - 01:36 AM
Janie 04 Apr 11 - 01:19 AM
Acme 03 Apr 11 - 11:13 PM
Rapparee 03 Apr 11 - 11:06 PM
Little Hawk 03 Apr 11 - 10:58 PM
Rapparee 03 Apr 11 - 10:49 PM
Little Hawk 03 Apr 11 - 10:45 PM
Amos 03 Apr 11 - 10:16 PM
GUEST,Rapparee 03 Apr 11 - 01:04 PM
Amos 03 Apr 11 - 12:11 PM
Acme 03 Apr 11 - 10:58 AM
GUEST 03 Apr 11 - 09:43 AM
Acme 03 Apr 11 - 01:39 AM
Rapparee 02 Apr 11 - 10:50 PM
Amos 02 Apr 11 - 09:49 PM
gnu 02 Apr 11 - 03:52 PM
Acme 02 Apr 11 - 02:27 PM
gnu 02 Apr 11 - 12:50 PM
Rapparee 01 Apr 11 - 09:17 PM
Rapparee 01 Apr 11 - 05:42 PM
Eiseley 01 Apr 11 - 04:08 PM
Little Hawk 01 Apr 11 - 03:56 PM
Amos 01 Apr 11 - 01:20 PM
Rapparee 01 Apr 11 - 10:21 AM
Amos 01 Apr 11 - 09:42 AM
Acme 31 Mar 11 - 11:48 PM
Rapparee 31 Mar 11 - 11:37 PM
Eiseley 31 Mar 11 - 10:45 PM
Rapparee 31 Mar 11 - 09:25 PM
Amos 31 Mar 11 - 02:37 PM
GUEST,Chongo Chimp 31 Mar 11 - 11:23 AM
Eiseley 31 Mar 11 - 10:56 AM
Rapparee 31 Mar 11 - 10:43 AM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 05 Apr 11 - 09:12 AM

Oh Amos, I'm so sorry that happened. Yes, it's just stuff, but it's stuff that is important to you. At least they didn't get your socks.

I just put a lemon cake in the oven that we'll eat after middle son's French horn concert tonight. At least it's not bagpipes, yet.

Does life ever slow down?

Eiseley


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 05 Apr 11 - 01:21 AM

My guess is they didn't know much about guitars, Amos. That was lucky! (even if the rest wasn't)

Holding ill will against them is perfectly understandable, but it won't achieve anything other than putting knots in your stomach and stressing you out. Karma? Well, there are all sorts of interesting aspects to karma, but they can be a bit mysterious as to how they play out...and why. The sooner it stops really bugging you, though, the sooner you are free of it, right?

I think I had best insure some stuff around here. I'd been putting it off.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Apr 11 - 11:26 PM

Based on>>>> 'T was lifted directly!!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 04 Apr 11 - 10:48 PM

Was your first one sung to Nell Flaherty's Drake? I do like that song!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Apr 11 - 10:43 PM

Whilst I'm on the subject of cursing, here's the famous Curse On Doneraile. I dislike the part about rapparees, but it's generic.

            The Curse of Doneraile

Alas, how dismal is my tale, I lost my watch in Doneraile.
My Dublin watch, my chain and seal, Pilfered at once in Doneraile
May fire and brimstone never fail, To fall in showers on Doneraile.
As lightening flashes across the vale, So down to hell with Doneraile
The fate of Pompey at Pharsale, Be that the curse of Doneraile.
May Beef or Mutton, Lamb or Veal, Be never found in Doneraile.
But Garlic Soup and Scurvy Kale, Be still the food of Doneraile.
May Heaven a chosen curse entail, On rigid rotten Doneraile.
May Sun and Moon forever fail, To beam their lights on Doneraile
May every pestilential gale, Blast that cursed spot called Doneraile.
May not a Cuckoo, Thrush or Quail, Be ever heard in Doneraile.
May Patriots, Kings and commonweal, Despise and harrass Doneraile.
May every Post, Gazette and Mail, Sad tidings bring to Doneraile.
May loudest thunders ring a Peal, To blind and deafen Doneraile.
May vengeance fall at head and tail, From north to south at Doneraile.
May profit light and tardy sale, Still damp the trade of Doneraile.
May fame resound a dismal tale, Whenever she lights at Doneraile.
May Egypt's plagues at once prevail, To thin the knaves of Doneraile.
May frost and snow and sleet and hail, Benumb each joint in Doneraile.
May wolves and bloodhounds trace and trail, The cursed crew of Doneraile.
May Oscar with his fiery flail, To Atoms thresh all Doneraile.
May every mischief fresh and stale, Abide henceforth in Doneraile.
May all from Belfast to Kinsale, Scoff, Curse and Damn you, Doneraile.
May neither flour nor oatenmeal, Be found or known in Doneraile.
May want and woe each joy curtail, That ever was known in Doneraile.
May no one coffin want a nail, That wraps a rogue in Doneraile.
May all the thieves that rob and steal, The gallows meet in Doneraile.
May all the sons of Granuaile, Blush at the thieves of Doneraile.
May mischief big as Norway whale, Overwhelm the knaves of Doneraile.
May curses wholesale and retail, Pour with full force on Doneraile.
May every transport wont to sail, A convict bring from Doneraile.
May every churn and milking pail, Fall dry to stones in Doneraile.
May cold and hunger still congeal, The stagnant blood of Doneraile.
May every hour new woes reveal, That Hell reserves for Doneraile.
May every chosen ill prevail, Over all the imps of Doneraile.
May no one wish or prayer avail, To soothe the woes of Doneraile.
May the Inquisition straight impale, The rapparees of Doneraile.
May curse of Sodom now prevail, And sink to ashes Doneraile.
May Charon's boat triumphant sail, Completely manned from Doneraile.
Oh! may my couplets never fail, To find new curse in Doneraile,
And may grim Pluto's inner jail, Forever groan with Doneraile.


                                  --Pat O'Kelly, 1808


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 04 Apr 11 - 10:23 PM

Wellll....I'm a bad shot.

I say, let's sic Rap and Chongo on them.

Or wait and let Bruce Willis take care of em Down in Hollywood.

(OK, Ry and JJ do better musical jobs, but Brucie - well - need I say more.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Apr 11 - 10:13 PM

Oh, heck, Amos. I'll wish them ill for you and take the karma onto myself. In the true folk tradition I'll just modify an existing song a tad...

That a ghost may him haunt in the dark of the night,
May his hen never lay, may his ass never bray,
May his goat fly away like an old paper kite:
That the rats and the fleas may the wretch ever tease,
May the piercing north-breeze make him tremble and shake:
May a four-year old bug build a nest in the mug,      
The monster that took all from poor Amos' shack.

May his cock never grow, may his bellows ne'er blow,
And for bed, pot and hole may he never have none;
May his cradle not rock, may his box have no lock,
May his wife have no frock to shade her back-bone,
May his cock be a quack, may his bollocks turn black,
And stain down his pants with a long yellow streak,
May the scurvy and leech never part from the breech,
The monster that took all from poor Amos' shack.

May his pipe never smoke, may his pee-pot be broke,
And add to the joke may his kettle ne'er boil,
May he poop in the bed 'til the hour he's dead,
May he always be fed on ipacac and fish oil.
May he swell with the gout, may his grinders fall out.
May he roar, bawl and shout with the horrid tooth-ache,
May his temples wear horns, and all his toes corns,
The monster that took all from poor Amos' shack.

May his spade never dig, may his sow never pig,
May each nit in his wig be as large as a snail,
May his door have no latch, may his house have no thatch.
May his turkeys not hatch, may the rats eat his meal.
May every old fairy from Cork to Dunleary.
Dip his snug and airy in river and lake,
Where the eel and the trout they might dine on the snout.
The monster that took all from poor Amos' shack.

May his dog yelp and growl with both hunger and cold,
And his wife always scold till his brains go astray,
May the curse of each hag that e'er carried a bag,
May light on the thief till his head turns to grey.
May monkeys still bite him, and mad dogs affright him,
And every one slight him, asleep or awake,
May the mice still gnaw on him, and jack-daws shit on him,
The monster that took all from poor Amos' shack.

He/They should be easy to find after all that....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Apr 11 - 08:34 PM

If I wish them ill, will it darken my own karma? Is this retribution for some past foul deed of mine, long buried? Or is it my karma because the karma fairies KNEW I'd wish them ill after it happened, which made it right and just to happen? Or was one of them in some desperate need of all my stuff, too desperate to earn it in the usual way? Pshaw. Shoot on sight. Oh, it was fast in and out alright. Straight to the high-dollar fast-turnover items. There was a $6000 Martin hanging on the wall in the room they took the TV from, and they ignored it. Ha. Ha.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 04 Apr 11 - 08:13 PM

It may only be "stuff" Amos, but it still sucks.

The good thing about karma is one doesn't have to wish for it to catch up with some one, nor does one have to take consolation in knowing that.




Trees blooming all over the place.
Big wind blowing all day.
Zyrtec is my friend.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 04 Apr 11 - 04:35 PM

Sounds like they had time to poke around if they got all of those things? They dropped and ran when a neighbor spotted the strange Cadillac backed up in my driveway and the stereotypical robbery looking suspects hauling things out of the house and into the trunk. They'd just started going through my room when they stopped. Televisions, computers, video games, etc. in probably under five minutes. They saw my neighbor look up the drive, slam on her brakes, and back into the driveway across the street to get their license, and then she shot down the street to city hall to catch the sheriff. No one was ever caught (the Sheriff's office seems to have been stymied by the little lady who didn't speak English at the house they knocked on for the registered owner of the Cadillac. In Texas they apparently couldn't get past a Spanish speaker. Duh.)

Since then I try to never let my front yard get so tall that it looks like no one is here. I was here when it happened to us, but I'd had two weeks of children home with the flu and just hadn't had a chance (in February!) to knock down the weeds with the mower. The sheriff could see where they walked across the front lawn to ring that doorbell first, to see if I was home. I remember over the years having young men who did not look like they wanted to mow the lawn look a little startled when I opened the front door. I suspect that I'd seen the tactic, if not the burglar, before, and this time they got lucky.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 04 Apr 11 - 04:06 PM

My sign says, "Beware of Irishman". And, the large fake doggy door on the garage with the 100 grade, 2" link chain has worked so far. Although, I have had delivery problems at times when I have not been home.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 04 Apr 11 - 02:45 PM

The usual stuff. So they did not get your guitar? The main things I'd be worried about here are the musical instruments and computers.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Apr 11 - 02:23 PM

A bunch of stuff-both our main computers, all my wife's collection of jewelry, much of it handmade or antique, and beyond replacement; one of her backup storage devices; a high-def TV recently acquired; my Colt .22 Police Positive revolver...Just stuff, but a goddamn nuisance, especially the computers which we will haver to replace. I think AAA will gbe decent about it but am waiting to see.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 04 Apr 11 - 01:38 PM

My pitbull has a deep well-modulated voice, very authoritative. She sounds larger than 55 pounds, rather in the way LH described full-sized dachshunds. My catahoula mix (45 pounds) has a loud normal bark, but like Roy Orbison also has an operatic soprano falsetto and goes off like a bottle rocket when she's unhappy about something human, animal (possum, cat, etc.). Between the two it sounds like a small army of dogs behind the wrought iron gate to the back yard. They can see much of the driveway to cover the side door and the garage door. They can't see the front door, but that is clearly visible from the street.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 04 Apr 11 - 12:49 PM

Yeah, a loud dog works great. So, what stuff did they relieve you of, Amos?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Apr 11 - 10:29 AM

THat's what I need--a loud dog.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Apr 11 - 10:18 AM

Some people around here put up signs that read, "This House Protected By Smith & Wesson." This doesn't help much at all, especially if the house is empty. It just advertises that there might be guns there.

No, if I were to put up a sign it would read "CAUTION! Dysfunctional Veteran! Keep your hands up and stay in the middle of the path. Obey all commands immediately."

There is no threat in that -- I am a dysfunctional veteran (Type II diabetes, hearing loss) and you are cautioned because I could go into hypoglycemia or something. The rest is just advice. But of course, you might read it differently....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 04 Apr 11 - 01:36 AM

"none-sexist"?

Dachshunds generally make excellent watchdogs. They have very acute hearing, don't miss much, and will make one hell of a racket when they hear anything suspicious. That in itself will scare off most robbers. The full size Dachshunds have a deep bark that sounds like a much bigger dog, and they can also be quite fierce to an intruder...and that's no joke. They have a very powerful bite and a totally determined attitude when on the warpath.

I don't know about strong doors. They would help, I guess, with amateur housebreakers, but the pros will break open just about anything but a steel door.

Some people around here put up "Beware Dog" signs on their property even when they don't have a dog. It helps.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 04 Apr 11 - 01:19 AM

Noise is good with a break in. So is a none-sexist officer of the law.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 03 Apr 11 - 11:13 PM

Dogs do make a difference because all they have to do is make noise. They don't need to be trained guard dogs (the prospect of living with one of those seems pretty grim, actually). And they're funny - the pit bull, in particular, sometimes late at night if I take the trash out she'll bark. When she realizes it was me, she looks a little embarrassed. :)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Apr 11 - 11:06 PM

I prefer anti-personnel mines that arm themselves when go to bed. Of course, it's best if you're not a sleepwalker.

Seriously, solid doors with good strong lockS, good window security (locks, etc.), and a dachshund trained to kill on command* are probably the best defenses. You can't really stop a determined robber, you can only hope to made it so that it's not worth the trouble.




*or pee on the perp's leg.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 03 Apr 11 - 10:58 PM

Breakins are a terrible thing for people to go through. They've gotten pretty common around here. There are 3 people among my group of musical friends here who have suffereded break-ins in recent years.

The best way to prevent them is to have a good watchdog in the house.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Apr 11 - 10:49 PM

Yeah, and in addition to stuff they took his sense of security. Break-ins really suck. I've been there, but instead of feeling violated, like you're supposed to feel, my wife and I were really, really pissed off.

If the doers of the deed at Amos' place are caught I hope he suggests community service for them -- say, 12 hours as bayonet training dummies at Camp Pendleton.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 03 Apr 11 - 10:45 PM

You place got broken into, Amos?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 03 Apr 11 - 10:16 PM

It's been a long productive day, Mom. I repaired the sprinkler system, and I handled bits and pieces left from the effing breakin and I helped Genie record her piece for the Mudcat Seasonal CD, and I got the last of BBW's edits on the book done and sent her the final review copy, and I made dinner and did dishes and...and...a bunch more stuff I forget.

ANother damned week of employed productivity lies ahead, like the endless freeways of West Texas. It reminds me of those long drives punctuated only by miles of Texas miles and the occasional billboard that reads "If you lived here, you would be home now!" but leave out the part that says "...but you wouldn't have any friends!"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Rapparee
Date: 03 Apr 11 - 01:04 PM

Yulp, that war me.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 03 Apr 11 - 12:11 PM

Even as a Guest, he is suspect!! Oh, tempura!! Oh, morels!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 03 Apr 11 - 10:58 AM

I strongly suspect that last "Guest" was our own Raparee.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST
Date: 03 Apr 11 - 09:43 AM

I forbear from telling what happened the day my brother fell into the pen.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 03 Apr 11 - 01:39 AM

With that story I think our best policy is to grin and bear it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Apr 11 - 10:50 PM

We used to get baby ducks and chicks for Easter. We'd feed them and they'd grow up and one day they'd run away. Shortly thereafter we had poultry of one sort or another for dinner. We never had rabbits because the coyotes would eat them. Duckies and chickies would eat the coyote, at least the duckies and chickies we had. One day a grizzly bear knocked its way into the duckies and chickies pen and when the d&c's couldn't reason with him they turned him into a capon and...well, it was rudely humorous.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 02 Apr 11 - 09:49 PM

Puir dookies!! The look on their faces when they finally got back up!! "WTF WAS THAT, MOM!! You told me it was SAFE!..."


LOL



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 02 Apr 11 - 03:52 PM

That obviously makes no nevermind.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 02 Apr 11 - 02:27 PM

MOM! Have you seen this new movie? Away All Boats Ducks?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 02 Apr 11 - 12:50 PM

Toys are better than boys?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Apr 11 - 09:17 PM

Well, Pat's upstairs playing with her new computer.

You know the old saying about women and their toys....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Apr 11 - 05:42 PM

Yes, purple ones with a purple one, tho' I'm certain he has never tasted, much less drunk, a purple Jesus.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 01 Apr 11 - 04:08 PM

He hates pimp[le]s with a passion.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 01 Apr 11 - 03:56 PM

Wow. Majorly specist lyrics there, Amos. I don't think Chongo will be pleased. He hates pimps with a passion.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Apr 11 - 01:20 PM

I don' wanna be now businessman
Or a monkey in a tree
Ever since I was a little ape
A pimp is what I wanted to be
Yes I am bound to pimp
A pimping chimp's the life for me
Let me beat on the ladies
A pimpin' chimp's what I wanna be.


Gonna drive me a pink Caddielac
And shoot a big pink gat
Gonna shake down all the ladiers, yeah
In a pink fedora hat
Yes I am bound to pimp
A pimping chimp's the life for me
Let me beat on the ladies
A pimpin' chimp's what I wanna be.


My momma often tole me
You should not act like this
Just think of poor sweet Chinga
And protect your little Sis
But I am bound to pimp
A pimping chimp's the life for me
Let me beat on the ladies
A pimpin' chimp's what I wanna be.

You know I love hard whiskey
And I love those big cigars
I wanna spend like a big-time pimp
And drive a big pimp's car
Yes I am bound to pimp
A pimping chimp's the life for me
Let me beat on the ladies
A pimpin' chimp's what I wanna be.


(Sliding steel with heavy R&B backing fades out....)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Apr 11 - 10:21 AM

My nephew, Dan, was VERY upset because on the day before my brother collapsed in the ER his father had sighed and said to him, "Dan, you'll be the death of me yet" as he checked over Dan' homework. It took quite a lot of work to convince him that it was just an expression and he wasn't guilty of anything.

Stuff like that can come back and haunt someone.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Apr 11 - 09:42 AM

Your sense of humor is transparent. Eiseley, my condolences; I wish her a safe passage and a well-chosen return.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 31 Mar 11 - 11:48 PM

Your Granny and Janie's father. Death didn't take a holiday today.

Just in case your son does remember that, you might want to talk about it with him - that jokes can't bring on events. At least not events like this. Because when tomorrow rolls around, he may think back, but he is liable to not share his thoughts, just worry about them.

Tomorrow is the annual art glass sale on campus. It gets bigger every year and most of the glass is now untouchable. I'm awfully tempted to go - they've been doing some wonderful things with fuzed glass, as well as blowing and molding. The students and faculty there are a real glass act!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 Mar 11 - 11:37 PM

Requiescat in pace.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 31 Mar 11 - 10:45 PM

Granny has gone to her eternal reward. It is actually a relief, to all the others as well as to Granny herself. Three hundred sixty-four days ago exactly, my middle son came running in the house with a very subdued look on his face and said solemnly, "Granny just died . . . " I waited, a bit shocked, and he continued ". . . April Fool!"

I don't think I'll remind him. :)

Eiseley


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 Mar 11 - 09:25 PM

Once a little chimpanzee
Was learning at his mother's knee
Of the ways of apes and chimps,
Monkeys, bonobos, orangutangs and pimps.

"Yes!" shouted the little chimpanzee
"A pimp is what I want to be!"
His poor mother fainted dead away,
And her little son went out to play.

He sold his sisters to some men
Who used them up, one died, and then
He stole his elderly father's gun,
And from his mother stole quite a sum.

He used ill-gotten loot to buy
A ticket to the You Ess Eye
Where he slipped through Immigration tight
By hiding in a tun of shite.

Now he lives in the Windy City
(A place to be in fear and pity)
Denies his sister, mom and dad:
Methinks this chimp's gone to the bad.

    -- Amelia Mary Freshet, A Bad Little Monkey
       (Small, Idaho: Small Press, 1873)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 31 Mar 11 - 02:37 PM

"I love you, Mother!" said CHongo the creep
And down the stairs did softly creep
Stealing his long dead father's gat
And hitting the road. What love is that?
Leaving her, aged, to moan and limp
Such is the love of Chongo Chimp.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 31 Mar 11 - 11:23 AM

It does my heart good to see all this great poetry about chimps makin' itself heard and raisin' the public consciousness.

- Chongo


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 31 Mar 11 - 10:56 AM

A Test of Love

"I love you, Mother," said little John;
Then, forgetting his work, his cap went on,
And he was off to the garden swing,
Leaving his mother the wood to bring.

"I love you, Mother," said little Nell;
"I love you better than tongue can tell!"
Then she teased and pouted half the day,
Till mother rejoiced when she went to play.

"I love you, Mother," said little Fan
"Today I'll help you all I can,"
To the cradle then she did softly creep,
And rocked the baby till it fell asleep.


Then stepping softly, she took the broom,
And swept the floor and dusted the room;
Busy and happy all day was she,
Helpful and cheerful as she could be.

"I love you, Mother," again they said,
Three little children going to bed.
How do you think that Mother guessed
Which of them really loved her best?

From Ethics for Chimpanzees
by Elmer F. Capon


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 Mar 11 - 10:43 AM

I hardly know what to say about that poem, Stilly. It's touched me, touched me deeply. Having read it my life was completed and all other poetry and prose have, like an insubstantial pageant, faded and left not a rack behind. Other poetry, like gorgeous palaces and cloud-capped towers, have faded into air, into thing air. I know now that they were but such things as dreams were made of and their little life were rounded with a sleep.


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