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Lyr Add: Vegetarians No! - Carrot Juice is Murder

George Seto - af221@chebucto.ns.ca 07 Jul 03 - 10:31 AM
GUEST,MMario 07 Jul 03 - 10:36 AM
katlaughing 07 Jul 03 - 10:43 AM
alanabit 07 Jul 03 - 10:49 AM
WFDU - Ron Olesko 07 Jul 03 - 11:06 AM
George Seto - af221@chebucto.ns.ca 07 Jul 03 - 11:17 AM
Raptor 07 Jul 03 - 12:21 PM
GUEST,Q 07 Jul 03 - 12:46 PM
Ron Olesko 07 Jul 03 - 12:47 PM
McGrath of Harlow 07 Jul 03 - 12:53 PM
Amos 07 Jul 03 - 12:57 PM
GUEST,Q 07 Jul 03 - 01:00 PM
Ron Olesko 07 Jul 03 - 02:03 PM
AllisonA(Animaterra) 07 Jul 03 - 02:07 PM
Frankham 07 Jul 03 - 04:42 PM
Liz the Squeak 07 Jul 03 - 04:45 PM
George Seto - af221@chebucto.ns.ca 07 Jul 03 - 04:47 PM
Ron Olesko 07 Jul 03 - 05:16 PM
George Seto - af221@chebucto.ns.ca 07 Jul 03 - 05:25 PM
WFDU - Ron Olesko 07 Jul 03 - 10:11 PM
alanabit 08 Jul 03 - 02:20 AM
ooh-aah 08 Jul 03 - 03:14 AM
Ron Olesko 08 Jul 03 - 09:07 AM
McGrath of Harlow 08 Jul 03 - 09:37 AM
GUEST 08 Jul 03 - 09:39 AM
Ron Olesko 08 Jul 03 - 09:44 AM
hesperis 08 Jul 03 - 02:14 PM
GUEST,Neil Pye 31 May 12 - 12:00 PM
treewind 31 May 12 - 01:17 PM
treewind 31 May 12 - 01:18 PM
treewind 31 May 12 - 01:36 PM
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Subject: Lyr ADD: Carrot Juice is Murder
From: George Seto - af221@chebucto.ns.ca
Date: 07 Jul 03 - 10:31 AM

From Carrot Juice Is Murder

Carrot Juice Is Murder
Artist : Arrogant Worms

Listen up brothers and sisters come hear my desperate tale
I speak of our friends of nature trapped in the dirt like a jail
Vegetables live in oppression, served on our tables each night
This killing of veggies is madness, I say we take up the fight
Salads are only for murderers, coleslaw's a fascist regime
Don't think that they don't have feelings, just cause a radish can't scream
 
Chorus:
I've heard the screams of the vegetables (scream, scream, scream)
Watching their skins being peeled (having their insides revealed)
Grated and steamed with no mercy (burning off calories)
How do you think that feels (bet it hurts really bad)
Carrot juice constitutes murder (and that's a real crime)
Greenhouses prisons for slaves (let my vegetables go)
It's time to stop all this gardening (it's dirty as hell)
Let's call a spade a spade (is a spade is a spade is a spade)
 
I saw a man eating celery, so I beat him black and blue
If he ever touches a sprout again, I'll bite him clean in two
I'm a political prisoner, trapped in a windowless cage
Cause I stopped the slaughter of turnips by killing five men in a rage
I told the judge when he sentenced me, "This is my finest hour,
I'd kill those farmers again just to save one more cauliflower"
 
Chorus
 
How low as people do we dare to stoop,
Making young broccolis bleed in the soup?
Untie your beans, uncage your tomatoes
Let potted plants free, don't mash that potato!
Oh spare the spud! Eat a cow instead!
 
I've heard the screams of the vegetables (scream, scream, scream)
Watching their skins being peeled (fates in the stir-fry are sealed)
Grated and steamed with no mercy (you fat gourmet slob)
How do you think that feels? (leave them out in the field)
Carrot juice constitutes murder (V8's genocide)
Greenhouses prisons for slaves (yes, your composts are graves)
It's time to stop all this gardening (take up macrame)
Let's call a spade a spade (is a spade, is a spade, is a spade, is a spade......)

You can hear the song at:

Mp3 of the song


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Subject: RE: Vegetarians No! - Carrot Juice is Murder
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 07 Jul 03 - 10:36 AM

I like the way these guys brains work...


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Subject: RE: Vegetarians No! - Carrot Juice is Murder
From: katlaughing
Date: 07 Jul 03 - 10:43 AM

I guess this means I belong on death row if only they had their own prisons!**bg**


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Subject: RE: Vegetarians No! - Carrot Juice is Murder
From: alanabit
Date: 07 Jul 03 - 10:49 AM

I loved it. It's the same idea as Tom Paxton's song about murdering spuds, isn't it?


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Subject: RE: Vegetarians No! - Carrot Juice is Murder
From: WFDU - Ron Olesko
Date: 07 Jul 03 - 11:06 AM

The Arrogant Worms are amazing. I wish they would play the U.S. more often. Clever and funny.   Their CD's only tell part of the story. As good as their songs are, their live show is even better.

Check out "We Are the Beaver", "Jesus' Brother Bob","Celine Dion" and many others. Great stuff!

Ron


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Subject: RE: Vegetarians No! - Carrot Juice is Murder
From: George Seto - af221@chebucto.ns.ca
Date: 07 Jul 03 - 11:17 AM

Yes, it seems like Don't Slay That Potatoe

But I think the Arrogant Worms song is pretty amazing.


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Subject: Lyr Add: I AM COW (Arrogant Worms)
From: Raptor
Date: 07 Jul 03 - 12:21 PM

I am cow. Hear me moo.
I weigh twice as much as you
And I look good on the barbecue
Yogurt curds, cream cheese, and butter
Is made from liquid from my udder.
I am cow. I am cow. Hear me moo.

I am cow, eating grass.
Methane gas comes out my ass,
And out my muzzle when I belch.
Oh, the ozone layer is thinner
From the outcome of my dinner
I am cow. I am cow. I got gas.

I am cow. Here I stand,
Far and wide throughout this land.
And I am living everywhere.
From B.C. to Newfoundland,
You can squeeze my teats by hand
I am cow. I am cow. I am cow.

Arrogant Worms CD "Dirt!"
WORDS TO LIVE BY!
Raptor


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Subject: RE: Vegetarians No! - Carrot Juice is Murder
From: GUEST,Q
Date: 07 Jul 03 - 12:46 PM

What is the volumetric comparison? Gases released by cattle vs. gases released by humans? Are we destroying the ozone layer by just being alive?
Would 100 % birth control on humans contribute to saving the earth?

Ok, OK, stray thoughts on reading poems like Carrot Juice and I Am Cow.
Good one, George!


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Subject: RE: Vegetarians No! - Carrot Juice is Murder
From: Ron Olesko
Date: 07 Jul 03 - 12:47 PM

Yes, the world would be a better place without humans. There would also be less rush hour traffic.


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Subject: RE: Vegetarians No! - Carrot Juice is Murder
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 07 Jul 03 - 12:53 PM

"...not only became a vegetarian, but at length declared vegetarianism doomed ('shedding,' as he called it finely, 'the green blood of the silent animals), and predicted that men in a better age would live on nothing but salt.

Then came the pamphlet from Oregon (where the thing was tried), the pamphlet called 'Why should salt suffer?'...
(From Chesterton's Napoleon of Notting Hill - "Introductory Remarks on the Art of Prophecy".


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Subject: RE: Vegetarians No! - Carrot Juice is Murder
From: Amos
Date: 07 Jul 03 - 12:57 PM

Well, I don't agree. Without humans, a lot of beauty would be gone or never brought into being. And besides, whose point of view is it that this "betterness" is being assessed from? A disincarnate spook?

A


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Subject: RE: Vegetarians No! - Carrot Juice is Murder
From: GUEST,Q
Date: 07 Jul 03 - 01:00 PM

Soylent green anyone?


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Subject: RE: Vegetarians No! - Carrot Juice is Murder
From: Ron Olesko
Date: 07 Jul 03 - 02:03 PM

Amos - I think we take too much credit for bringing beauty in this world. Let's give a carrot a paintbrush and see what it can produce.


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Subject: RE: Vegetarians No! - Carrot Juice is Murder
From: AllisonA(Animaterra)
Date: 07 Jul 03 - 02:07 PM

My daugher and I just discovered the Arrogant Worms at Old Songs last week- they're a hoot!


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Subject: RE: Vegetarians No! - Carrot Juice is Murder
From: Frankham
Date: 07 Jul 03 - 04:42 PM

Well I looked at the song. It's joke was in the first stanza and then it was repeated throughout going nowhere. It's mediocre writing by some young folks who don't use the English language too well and want to diss vegetarians. I remember Woody Guthrie saying "I hate a song that makes a person feel small, no good...etc."

It's an old format. "Away With Rum" was used to lampoon those who were opposed to alcohol.

I don't know what the point of the song is other than to diss vegetarianism. That's funny?

Frank Hamilton


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Subject: RE: Vegetarians No! - Carrot Juice is Murder
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 07 Jul 03 - 04:45 PM

Not only is it murder, if you drink too much of it, it will turn you orange.

LTS


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Subject: RE: Vegetarians No! - Carrot Juice is Murder
From: George Seto - af221@chebucto.ns.ca
Date: 07 Jul 03 - 04:47 PM

It IS funny!


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Subject: RE: Vegetarians No! - Carrot Juice is Murder
From: Ron Olesko
Date: 07 Jul 03 - 05:16 PM

I don't think that it is dissing vegetarianism as much as it is dissing extremists.   The second verse has the singer committing acts of violence in order to stop violence.   Think Unibomber, radical abortion foes, radical conservationists who will spike trees and other extremists who seem to contradict their own beliefs.

Woody did say "I hate a song that makes a person feel small, no good...etc.", but even he threw barbs at those that he felt deserved it. Besides, the Arrogant Worms are not making fun of vegetarians.

Is the writing good? Perhaps not, but again I think you need to see them in performance to truly get the point. Reading the lyrics as posted does not convey the intent.

I am reminded of Groucho Marx remark, which I paraphrase, "If you have to analyze humor, it isn't funny".

Ron


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Subject: RE: Vegetarians No! - Carrot Juice is Murder
From: George Seto - af221@chebucto.ns.ca
Date: 07 Jul 03 - 05:25 PM

So true Ron.

I heard a couple of buskers doing the song yesterday and had to look it up when I got home. I think it's one hoot of a song.

Not that I'm down on vegetarians, just I don't like most of them. (Vegetables that is) Well don't like it kind of strong. I just don't go out of my way to have vegetables with my meals.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Vegetarians No! - Carrot Juice is Mur
From: WFDU - Ron Olesko
Date: 07 Jul 03 - 10:11 PM

I wish I liked more vegetables than I do. It has taken me years to learn to appreciate their value, and their taste.

I think it was Tom Paxton who once described his philosphy as "are you going to finish those ribs?"


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Subject: Lyr Add: THE PARROT SONG
From: alanabit
Date: 08 Jul 03 - 02:20 AM

Oddly enough Frank, you are addressing a point which I brought up a couple of weeks back on my "All My Songs Are Serious" thread. I was essentially asking whether songs which are merely frivolous have any merit at all. In your opinion (which is fair enough) you seem to come down on the side of the "Nos". I have been vegetarian for many years and I can't really get too upset by either Tom Paxton or The Arrogant Worms taking the piss out of me a bit. I have been guilty of far worse (writing and taste) myself. My own Parrot Song is far unkinder to pacifists and veggies. Personally, I think there is a place for entertainingly daft songs which add little to the sum of human perception. No disrespect to your own views, but I can't wait to hear more from The Arrogant Worms.

The Parrot Song (This is the fault of alanabit)


I love animals
I love cats and dogs and even creepy crawly things that bite when you're asleep
And I love birdies
And how it makes me sicken – when someone eats a chicken I could weep
For I aspire to consciousness serene as the Orientals
I do my Yoga everyday – I eat brown rice and lentils
But if I've not achieved enlightened states like the ancients
It's largely due to a feathered fiend's full fraying at my patience
Excuse me if I quiver
Excuse me if I stare
To contemplate that wretched bloody parrot over there

I like smoking
I like whacky baccy 'cos it makes me happy yes it makes me very jolly
But I'm choking
I'm without my grass thanks to the crass ignorance and greed of Pretty Polly
For just as I was freaking out to grow a crop of weed
Pretty Polly put her beak in – and ate the bloody seed
There's times I think I hate her
There's times I think I'll kill her
I'm going to mutilate and stuff her arse with Polyfilla
Excuse me if I quiver
It puts me in a rage
To contemplate that feathered freak there fluttering in its cage

When I've been courting
And I bring my loved one back to my pad for a night of gentle passion
But unsportingly
Pretty Polly kills it in her unremitting, below-the-belt hitting fashion
To my love I whisper,"Ich liebe Dich" – but as soon as Polly's seen us
She starts to squawk all forty verses of The Good Ship Venus
It's no good trying to understand or psychoanalyse her
I'll take a hammer in my hand and f§§&ing marmalise her
I meditate for patience
I read the holy word
But one day before long I'm going to stuff that bloody bird!

I love music
I love Dylan, The Pretenders, U2 and of course The Rolling Stones
She'd make you sick
For she imitates the songs I hate and on and on and on and on she drones
And some berk left the radio on - and now the sod's a gonner
For now my house reverberates to off key parrott Madonna!
I was a transcendental meditating vegetarian                        
She's turned me to a parrot hating murdering barbarian                
And I really do love birdies
I never thought I'd find
I'd have to commit murder just to get some peace of mind!


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Vegetarians No! - Carrot Juice is Murder
From: ooh-aah
Date: 08 Jul 03 - 03:14 AM

The argument that we are a good thing because we create beauty is crap - it's only for our benefit. How many radishes or wombats get a kick out of Rembrandt?


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Vegetarians No! - Carrot Juice is Murder
From: Ron Olesko
Date: 08 Jul 03 - 09:07 AM

I happen to know of three radishes that enjoy a good Rembrandt. Wombats seem to go for impressionists.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Vegetarians No! - Carrot Juice is Murder
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 08 Jul 03 - 09:37 AM

That song of alan's, reminds me of Jake Thackray - and that is high praise. I mean the words do, because I haven't heard it yet.

As for serious points - I'm afraid it does imply one, I think. This being that, while we may pride ourselves on being all liberal and tolerant, we fool ourselves if we don't recognise that we too have got the potential to flip if the right/wrong buttons are pushed.

And that recognition that it is telling a truth about ourselves would make it all the funnier.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Vegetarians No! - Carrot Juice is Murder
From: GUEST
Date: 08 Jul 03 - 09:39 AM

unless they are into pointelism


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Vegetarians No! - Carrot Juice is Murder
From: Ron Olesko
Date: 08 Jul 03 - 09:44 AM

McGrath - Good point. The song reminds me of Phil Ochs "Circle of Friends".


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Vegetarians No! - Carrot Juice is Murder
From: hesperis
Date: 08 Jul 03 - 02:14 PM

Arrogant Worms - from Kingston, Ontario! Yeah! (I have friends in Kingston.)

They played Hugh's Room in Toronto last month, unfortunately I found out too late. :(

The lyrics are sometimes repetitive, but repetition is something that hammers the point home, and sometimes that makes the point even funnier. They definitely have some songs even more brilliant than this one, and the delivery is fantastic. They have fun with it!


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Vegetarians No! - Carrot Juice is Murder
From: GUEST,Neil Pye
Date: 31 May 12 - 12:00 PM

Vegetable rights and peace!


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Vegetarians No! - Carrot Juice is Murder
From: treewind
Date: 31 May 12 - 01:17 PM

Also:
Don't be Cruel to a Vegetabuel (Mudcat thread)
and this priceless rendition of same
Don't be Cruel to a Vegetabuel (YouTube)

Though the chorus as I remember it was:

Don't be cruel to a vegetabuel
Always take its part
Don't be cruel to a vegetabuel
Remember every lettuce has a heart

If you please, don't split peas
Just because they're tasty on the tongue
And remember every time you order Brussels sprouts
You're going to rob a cabbage of its young


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Vegetarians No! - Carrot Juice is Murder
From: treewind
Date: 31 May 12 - 01:18 PM

PS: I'm vegetarian if I have a choice, and not bothered if I don't.
Anahata


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Vegetarians No! - Carrot Juice is Murder
From: treewind
Date: 31 May 12 - 01:36 PM

PPS - I see links going round in circles now. Sorry about the redundantly duplicated redundancy.


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