ADD: Cows with Guns (Dana Lyons)

Subject: cows with guns
From: alison
Date: 04 Sep 98 - 07:55 PM

hi,

I found these lyrics at International Lyrics Server. Does anyone know the tune?

Thanks

Slainte

alison

Subject: ADD: Cows With Guns (Dana Lyons)
From: Joe Offer
Date: 04 Sep 98 - 09:00 PM

Gee, Alison, don't you think we ought to share the lyrics with everyone? Cute song.....I guess. the album is "Cows With Guns/Cow Pie Nation."
-Joe Offer-

COWS WITH GUNS
Dana Lyons, Copyright 1996 Lyons Brothers Music (BMI)
All Rights Reserved


Fat and docile, big and dumb
They look so stupid, they aren't much fun
Cows aren't fun

They eat to grow, grow to die
Die to be et at the hamburger fry
Cows well done

Nobody thunk it, nobody knew
No one imagined the great cow guru
Cows are one

He hid in the forest, read books with great zeal
He loved Che Guevera, a revolutionary veal
Cow Se Tongue

He spoke about justice, but nobody stirred
He felt like an outcast, alone in the herd
Cow doldrums

He mooed we must fight, escape or we'll die
Cows gathered around, cause the steaks were so high
Bad cow pun

But then he was captured, stuffed into a crate
Loaded onto a truck, where he rode to his fate
Cows are bummed

He was a scrawny calf, who looked rather woozy
No one suspected he was packing an Uzi
Cows with guns

They came with a needle to stick in his thigh
He kicked for the groin, he pissed in their eye
Cow well hung

Knocked over a tractor and ran for the door
Six gallons of gas flowed out on the floor
Run cows run!

He picked up a bullhorn and jumped up on the hay
We are free roving bovines, we run free today

We will fight for bovine freedom
And hold our large heads high
We will run free with the buffalo, or die
Cows with guns

They crashed the gate in a great stampede
Tipped over a milk truck, torched all the feed
Cows have fun

Sixty police cars were piled in a heap
Covered in cow pies, covered up deep
Much cow dung

Black smoke rising, darkening the day
Twelve burning McDonalds, have it your way

We will fight for bovine freedom
And hold our large heads high
We will run free with the buffalo, or die
Cows with guns

The President said "enough is enough
These uppity cattle, its time to get tough"
Cow dung flung

The newspapers gloated, folks sighed with relief
Tomorrow at noon, they would all be ground beef
Cows on buns

The cows were surrounded, they waited and prayed
They mooed their last moos, they chewed their last hay
Cows outgunned

The order was given to turn cows to Whoppers
Enforced by the might of ten thousand coppers
But on the horizon surrounding the shoppers
Came the deafening roar of chickens in choppers

We will fight for bovine freedom
And hold our large heads high
We will run free with the buffalo, or die
Cows with guns

Subject: RE: cows with guns
From: Helen
Date: 05 Sep 98 - 12:47 AM

Hi Alison,

I'm pretty sure this song was included on the latest Triple-J (Australian radio station) Hottest 100 album. It's a really good song, worth listening to.

Helen

Subject: RE: cows with guns
From: alison
Date: 05 Sep 98 - 01:12 AM

Hi Joe,

I wasn't going to include the lyrics unless someone else was interested..... this being a folk site.......

But thanks for saving me the hassle.

Thanks Helen.

Slainte

alison

Subject: RE: cows with guns
From: Helen
Date: 05 Sep 98 - 07:56 PM

Alison,

I think this song crosses all boundaries of music style - it's funny, clever, satirical, and it has a good tune.

Helen

Subject: RE: cows with guns
From: Gypsy
Date: 31 Mar 02 - 12:32 AM

Just had this sung at us late one session. Such a song must not be forgotten! However, the tune is reallllllly familiar. Anyone else out there know the tune, so i can look up the dots? Thanks, all.

Subject: RE: cows with guns
From: GUEST,Terry
Date: 31 Mar 02 - 05:14 AM

You can find an MP3 on this page

Terry

Subject: RE: cows with guns
From: Jon Freeman
Date: 31 Mar 02 - 05:31 AM

Thanks for the link Terry - just had a listen - love it.

Gypsy, I don't know what the tune is and I'll leave you to work out the dots from the MP3. It sort of reminds me of Big Bad John though but it's not that one.

Jon

Subject: RE: cows with guns
From: DonMeixner
Date: 31 Mar 02 - 07:41 AM

I wonder how the cows must feel being the brunt of an arrogant humanistic joke?

Don

Subject: RE: cows with guns
From: GUEST,Terry
Date: 31 Mar 02 - 11:06 AM

I'm sure they're not very bothered, Don

Subject: RE: cows with guns
From: GUEST
Date: 31 Mar 02 - 11:17 AM

But the visit to www.cowswithguns.com is really worth the price of admission. You get so much more than just the mp3.

Subject: RE: cows with guns
From: irishajo
Date: 31 Mar 02 - 11:31 AM

Reminds me of the time three hungry cows chased my mother and my four year old self through a pasture. They can be frightening creatures!

Everything but the chorus sounds like Big Bad John to me.

Subject: RE: cows with guns
From: Little Hawk
Date: 31 Mar 02 - 01:47 PM

Ha! Good song.

- LH

Subject: RE: cows with guns
From: Gypsy
Date: 31 Mar 02 - 02:41 PM

Yer right, Big Bad John it is....the refrain is another pretty common melody, but it was the former that stuck in me headbone. Thanks for the clicky, too!

Subject: RE: cows with guns
From: GUEST
Date: 31 Mar 02 - 09:55 PM

I've heard of the right to keep and arm bears but this is ridiculous

Subject: RE: cows with guns
From: John Gray
Date: 31 Mar 02 - 10:05 PM

I have Cows with Guns in the car. When I drive in the country, and there are cows near the fenceline, I wind down the window, crank up the volume to max., and yell out 'listen up cows - here's your song.'
When my sons are with me their knowing looks say it all - Dad's lost it.

JG/FME

Subject: RE: cows with guns
From: Jeri
Date: 31 Mar 02 - 10:50 PM

Not Big Bad John. The "big bad" part is on one note, then it goes down for "John." In Cows, it goes up on the third note. The third note is the same in both songs, but the first two notes are different, although in harmony. Sounds like ska. Sounds like the Police could have done something similar. Sounds like I'm really over-analysing and should go to bed...

Subject: RE: cows with guns
From: Coyote Breath
Date: 31 Mar 02 - 11:56 PM

musta been penned by some city dude. keeps referring to cows as "he, him" etc. cows are always she. Bulls are he and steers, which have had unspeakable things done to then early in life so they are genderless, sort of, are what gets et (mostly).

To quote an old poem, possibly written by Ogden Nash;

"The cow is of the Bovine ilk One end is MOO the other milk."

I consider myself somewhat of an expert on cows, being as I was born and raised in Wisconsin and all and was a participant in the Great Cow Project back in 1975!

But, gender confusion aside, I loved the song!

CB

Subject: RE: cows with guns
From: katlaughing
Date: 01 Apr 02 - 12:05 AM

I loved it, too! Those are MY kinda cows! Power to the Gyrl-Cows! **BG** Thanks for the link, Terry and to you, Alison, for starting the thread!

katlaughing

Subject: RE: cows with guns
From: Gypsy
Date: 01 Apr 02 - 11:30 AM

I'm with you....we had cows and goats and stuff for years. And the mental image i had reading a book where they spoke of castrating cows.....OY!

Subject: RE: cows with guns
From: ChanteyMatt
Date: 01 Apr 02 - 03:07 PM

I get requests for "Cows" all the time. I also get threats, too. :-)

Subject: RE: ADD: Cows with Guns (Dana Lyons)
From: Joe Offer
Date: 11 Apr 21 - 03:47 AM

Here's an animated video:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FQMbXvn2RNI&t=132s