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BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)

Peace 16 Dec 03 - 02:42 PM
Amos 16 Dec 03 - 02:06 PM
Peace 16 Dec 03 - 01:52 PM
An Pluiméir Ceolmhar 16 Dec 03 - 12:24 PM
Peace 16 Dec 03 - 01:10 AM
Peace 16 Dec 03 - 01:04 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 16 Dec 03 - 12:59 AM
khandu 16 Dec 03 - 12:26 AM
Peace 15 Dec 03 - 11:50 PM
khandu 15 Dec 03 - 11:37 PM
Peace 15 Dec 03 - 01:39 PM
khandu 14 Dec 03 - 10:40 PM
YorkshireYankee 14 Dec 03 - 12:42 PM
Peace 14 Dec 03 - 12:21 PM
CarolC 14 Dec 03 - 12:02 PM
khandu 14 Dec 03 - 11:38 AM
Hrothgar 14 Dec 03 - 03:53 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 13 Dec 03 - 11:51 PM
GUEST,ilk 13 Dec 03 - 11:10 PM
Rapparee 13 Dec 03 - 10:11 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 12 Dec 03 - 11:53 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 12 Dec 03 - 11:45 PM
Peace 12 Dec 03 - 10:06 PM
Peace 12 Dec 03 - 10:04 PM
GUEST,ilk 12 Dec 03 - 09:55 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 12 Dec 03 - 09:13 PM
GUEST 12 Dec 03 - 08:47 PM
Rapparee 12 Dec 03 - 07:18 PM
Peace 12 Dec 03 - 07:13 PM
Rapparee 12 Dec 03 - 06:52 PM
Peace 12 Dec 03 - 06:42 PM
Peace 12 Dec 03 - 06:26 PM
GUEST 12 Dec 03 - 05:45 PM
GUEST,pdq 12 Dec 03 - 05:27 PM
CarolC 12 Dec 03 - 04:40 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 12 Dec 03 - 04:22 PM
Rapparee 12 Dec 03 - 03:29 PM
Peace 12 Dec 03 - 03:26 PM
GUEST,pdq 12 Dec 03 - 03:20 PM
Peace 12 Dec 03 - 02:33 PM
Amos 11 Dec 03 - 09:59 PM
CarolC 11 Dec 03 - 09:36 PM
CarolC 11 Dec 03 - 09:31 PM
Rapparee 11 Dec 03 - 04:39 PM
Amos 11 Dec 03 - 02:06 PM
Peace 11 Dec 03 - 02:02 PM
GUEST,Miss Ogyny 11 Dec 03 - 01:19 PM
Amos 11 Dec 03 - 01:17 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 11 Dec 03 - 01:14 PM
Peace 11 Dec 03 - 12:59 PM

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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Peace
Date: 16 Dec 03 - 02:42 PM

Polonius' death was a mistake. Recall that Hamlet said "I mistook thee for they better."I don't know what that's got to do with anything. It's the aluminium, I think.


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Amos
Date: 16 Dec 03 - 02:06 PM

A serious error about Polonius -- old Will knew what he was doing. Consider the whole text: ..and it shall follow as the night the day thou canst not then be false to any man.

Who better to present such a clause than an idiot who at least was himself? No-one said being true to yourself, if you are already an idiot, will make you smart. It makes you respected by your fellow-hoomans.

In my experience being true to yourself really does make you smarter but that is not the issue.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Peace
Date: 16 Dec 03 - 01:52 PM

Bien dit!


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: An Pluiméir Ceolmhar
Date: 16 Dec 03 - 12:24 PM

This is definitely much better than that stoopid "?" thread. Much higher intellectual calibre of people altogether.


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Peace
Date: 16 Dec 03 - 01:10 AM

Didn't know that, Bruce, but at last I have a title. It IS a position of importance, isn't it? Be the shits, uh, really sad if it was just another job that could be done by any old prick, uh, fellow. Besides, it's your turn in the barrel tomorrow. Have a good evening, where ever you are.


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Peace
Date: 16 Dec 03 - 01:04 AM

khandu: What are you doin' to the dog that it dances when you get home?


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 16 Dec 03 - 12:59 AM

And a wonderful regular king you are, khandu

That's right, Brucie, a right regular king he is. And it's all because of the efficiency of His Majesty's Royal Enema Deliverer.

Errr... You are aware that you, Brucie, have been honored with the title of His Majesty's Royal Enema Deliverer over on the MOAB thread, aren't you?

Bruce

His Majesty's Knower of Things, Poet Lariat, and Fupped Duck Idiot


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: khandu
Date: 16 Dec 03 - 12:26 AM

"Ever had something to say and no place to say it? ", brucie asked in the opening post to this thread; I do & I will say it!

This is a greatly needed thread, as is MOAB (to which brucie has posted twice out of his 615 Mudcat posts; howbeit, they were excellent posts!)---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Bacon!"
shouted the one-legged garage owner when he got mad at the local publican! ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Life is a grand adventure, though it took me nearly 50 years to realize this simple truth   
As bad as things can get, there is still much reason to be joyful!!! The
smile I see in my lucky wife's eyes when she looks at me; the way my dog Tinker dances when I come home; The light of the sun even on cloudy days; the fact that am able to belch ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
There are more reasons to rejoice than to bitch!!

Kk


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Peace
Date: 15 Dec 03 - 11:50 PM

And a wonderful regular king you are, khandu.


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: khandu
Date: 15 Dec 03 - 11:37 PM

I am not an infallable king, just a regular one, trying to keep this wonderful thread on the board!

Kk


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Peace
Date: 15 Dec 03 - 01:39 PM

Does this mean King Kan not do?


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: khandu
Date: 14 Dec 03 - 10:40 PM

I hereby decree th...what? This isn't MOAB???...thread for the threadless??? Oh, hell!

Nevermind.

King khandu


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: YorkshireYankee
Date: 14 Dec 03 - 12:42 PM

Brings up something I've never understood. If "To thine own self be true" is such great advice, why did Shakespeare have Polonius, a totally inept idiot, deliver the line?

Thinking back to my school days (mumblety years ago), when we studied Hamlet...

You're right, it was a joke. A bit like having a play where a character like Dubya dispenses loads of really good advice, like "Don't rush into military action; be careful not to alienate potential allies; learn how to speechify goodly," (or a character like Bill Clinton advises "Be faithful to your wife; if you screwmess up, admit it right away & take your medicine like a man,") -- which they clearly never bother with themselves.

Cheers,

YY


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Peace
Date: 14 Dec 03 - 12:21 PM

Yeah, what she said. Now, I gotta go milk my ilk.


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: CarolC
Date: 14 Dec 03 - 12:02 PM

I'll thank you to not be talking about my "ilk", Mr Bee-dubya-ell. I don't think that's a subject for polite company. Or for people like us, either.

GUEST 12 Dec 03 - 08:47 PM, thank you kindly.


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: khandu
Date: 14 Dec 03 - 11:38 AM

I got a gob of gorm in the Royal Basement! I might let it go for a goodly sum!

Kk


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Hrothgar
Date: 14 Dec 03 - 03:53 AM

Can we also get gorm for the gormless?

Or list for the listless?


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 13 Dec 03 - 11:51 PM

My dear Ilk,

I call to your attention this direct quote from the very first post to the Mother Of All BS Threads, spoken by King khandu himself:

Another brainstorm of mine, inspired by Tweed, Spaw, Carol the Sailor and their ilk.

As you can see from this quote, at least three Mudcatters are ilk "owners". (We put "owners" in quotation marks because it's never quite clear whether one owns the ilk or is owned by the ilk. Just a little ilk-related humor there.) Perhaps if you were to join our forum you could send private messages to these three members. I'm sure that, since they have ilk of their own, they would be sympathetic to your current state of mind. They may even arrange for you to communicate directly with their own ilk.

I'm sorry, but, personally, I have no ilk so I can't be of any direct assistance to you, but feel free to contact any or all of the three above-mentioned members. And be sure to mention my name in your communications with them. I love getting personal messages telling me what a fupped duck idiot I am.


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: GUEST,ilk
Date: 13 Dec 03 - 11:10 PM

This is my 2nd visit to Mudcat? This is my 2nd post also? I came here seeking knowledge of folk music? Yet, I somehow was sucked into this vast void at the bottom of the page?

What is this insanity. What has any of this to do with folk music.

I am dreadfully confused as well as terribly frightened? Have I somehow stepped into another universe where 6 is 9. Do I see someone pointing there plastic finger at me.

I have a coping saw? So don,t try anything untoward?

                                     Greetings,
                                           ilk


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Dec 03 - 10:11 AM

Except for Folklore threads, which could actually be either.


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 12 Dec 03 - 11:53 PM

Oh, and, conversely, one should apparently never put the BS tag on a music thread even if it is a totally off-the-wall music subject. There is a totally bogus and spurious (but also very funny) "guitar repair" thread that gets refreshed every few weeks. Though it's total BS, it's musical BS so it goes with the music threads.


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 12 Dec 03 - 11:45 PM

That is correct. When creating a new thread there's a box that says "Common Prefix (optional)". Well, it ain't really optional if it's a non-music thread. Click on the box to open the drop-down menu and select "BS/non-music". If you don't do it your post will go upstairs in the dreaded music threads where the music snobs will harumph and hem and haw until one of the folks that is empowered to do so moves it down here to the wasteland.


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Peace
Date: 12 Dec 03 - 10:06 PM

To be serious for a sec, if the thread has the BS designation in the title, it's a non-music thread. Threads without BS at the beginning of the title are music threads, and only music threads. .


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Peace
Date: 12 Dec 03 - 10:04 PM

GUEST, ilk: You gonna fit right in!


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: GUEST,ilk
Date: 12 Dec 03 - 09:55 PM

This is my first visit to Mudcat? This is my first post also? I came here seeking knowledge of folk music? Yet, I somehow was sucked into this vast void at the bottom of the page?

What is this insanity. What has any of this to do with folk music.

I am dreadfully confused as well as terribly frightened? Have I somehow stepped into another universe where 6 is 9. Do I see someone pointing there plastic finger at me.

I have a gun? So don,t try anything untoward?

                                     Greetings,
                                           ilk


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 12 Dec 03 - 09:13 PM

Brings up something I've never understood. If "To thine own self be true" is such great advice, why did Shakespeare have Polonius, a totally inept idiot, deliver the line?

Was it a cliche even in Shakespeare's time? Was it the Elizabethan equivalent of "Don't take any wooden nickles"? Or did Shakespeare feel sorry for old Polonius and simply throw him a bone - one good memorable line to stand out from the dreck? Or did Shakespeare just not realize that it was good advice? Is it a failed joke that has come to be taken seriously?


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: GUEST
Date: 12 Dec 03 - 08:47 PM

"This above all, to thine own self be true." Damn, what genius. What words to live by, even if one fails to abide by them from time to time.

Nice to have you back too, CarolC.


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Dec 03 - 07:18 PM

Ya treat yer gun like ya treat yer woman: ya keeps her clean and hugs her tight, and she'll treat ya right. Or so my old Basic Training Sergeant said.

Actually, muzzleloaders have less recoil than a modern firearm. That's cause the black powder burns more slowly than nitrocellulose, so you have more of a push than a whack. You do have to hold either one tight, though.

It's possible to "bark" a squirrel when hunting it, shooting at the branch and making the squirrel fall, but you gotta be awfully good to do it. I suspect that your chain was being yanked.


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Peace
Date: 12 Dec 03 - 07:13 PM

I fired a muzzle loader maybe twice in my life. Biggest damn projectile I have seen outside of mortar rounds. I asked the fellow who owned the rifle if he hunted with it. He said "Yeah. Squirrel." I was shocked, because the 'bullet' would have outweighed anything short of a large grey. He said he aimed for the branch the squirrel was on and got it with secondary projectiles. Don't know if he was yankin' my chain, but man, they got a kick to 'em. I have watched archers into the 'Zen' of archery. Wow. WEAR EAR PROTECTION FOR THE SHOOTING, OK? Later. Oh, yeah. The best .22 I ever had was a Vostok. What a rifle. Five round mag, bolt action, open sight. Thread a needle with it. Lost it in one of my moves. If I'd a thought to, I'd a named her. Beautiful.


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Dec 03 - 06:52 PM

Yes.

Bow, rifle, pistol, shotgun, and muzzleloaders. I'm a member of the local rifle range and will be joining the archers; I'm also a member of the NMLRA.. I enjoy it; it's almost Zen-like. But then I must admit that I'm much more into Olympic shooting than playing Rambo.

My bow is a Bear '76er, not the best but entirely adequate for me and what I do. I draw a 31" arrow, use a full-length arm guard and eschew such mechanical aids as pulleys, "triggers", weights, sights, and such. And of my firearms only one, a .22, has a telescopic sight.


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Peace
Date: 12 Dec 03 - 06:42 PM

Rapaire: I used a bow in the late '60s. It was about the same--I remember it was licensed for deer in Quebec. However, I was never good enough to use it for hunting. In fact, I was a danger to everyone. (Used to make my buddies nervous when I used a razor tip. Good with a rifl, but really lousy with a bow. You still shoot?


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Peace
Date: 12 Dec 03 - 06:26 PM

GUEST: Thank you for the offer. Usually I have to pay for that!


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: GUEST
Date: 12 Dec 03 - 05:45 PM

Hey, you! Brucie-boy! Waddayamean, "interesting, entertaining, filled with dynamic characters of both genders, filled with humour, knowledge, help or compassion."

You callin' me a wuss? You callin' me a caring, 90s kind of guy? You think I'm some kinda pansy or sumptin'? Huh? You think that I wear them 16th Century kinda panyhose that all these folkin' bluesy types wear?

Well, I got news for YOU, ya Shrinkin' Violet. I own me a pickup truck that stands six feet off the ground! There's a gunrack in the back window and I got a 10-gauge shotgun, a .375 rifle, and a .30-30 riding in it! An' swinging on the rack hooks ia a .458 Causul and a .500 S&W. I drink my whisky cut with gasoline -- flaming, and I eat red, raw meat that I carve off the carcass myself every meal, every day, with my genuine Marine Corps K-Bar! I've had a man for breakfast every day since I was ten years old, and ain't none of 'em around to complain!

You better not call me a wuss, ya hear? Otherwise me an' you gonna toss up some dust, and I ain't a gonna come back the loser!


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: GUEST,pdq
Date: 12 Dec 03 - 05:27 PM

We have a whole thread on the song "Gladly, the Cross-eyed Bear". Really.


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: CarolC
Date: 12 Dec 03 - 04:40 PM

Bruce, you horses patoot, you should never "append the disclaimer 'But what do I know? I'm just an idiot.' to anything you say that may be in any way construed to be controversial"! That's just being passive-aggresive.

(aahhhhh... it's good to be back ;-)


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 12 Dec 03 - 04:22 PM

Aw, Brucie, it's so nice to see someone still on his or her Mudcat Honeymoon. You obviously have yet to receive a private message informing you of the similarity between your personality and the opening at the lower end of one's alimentary canal. You also seem to have escaped being told that you are full of the well-known substance extruded through said opening.

If you wish to prolong your rosie-eyed view of this place, it is suggested that you do the following:

Avoid political discussions like the plague. Also religious discussions. For that matter, have no truck with musical discussions either. In other words, limit your comments to the truly noncontroversial, the totally mundane, or the absolutely pointless. Obit threads are easy. Just say "Sorry he/she's dead."

Append the disclaimer "But what do I know? I'm just an idiot." to anything you say that may be in any way construed to be controversial.

Avoid posting when you have had more than three beers or any amount of hard liquor. If you post while in any substantially altered state of consciousness you may read your post the next day and wonder who in the hell hijacked your member name and how they were able to do it.

Use no word other than "woman" when referring to a member of the female sex. (I refuse to use the word "gender" when referring to biological masculinity or femininity. "Gender" is a grammatical feature that nouns have in many languages. Words have gender. People have sex. This statement on my part will probably draw some ire, resulting in a Private Message informing me of the close resemblance between myself and the southern end of a northbound horse.)

Yerz,

The other Bruce


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Dec 03 - 03:29 PM

So, then, Brucie,you're an archer? I shoot a 45 lb. takedown recurve, myself.


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Peace
Date: 12 Dec 03 - 03:26 PM

I know. It's a cross one has to bear. Seriously, I haven't ever visited a site that was more interesting, entertaining, filled with dynamic characters of both genders, filled with humour, knowledge, help or compassion. But you're right; they breeds dangerously with their backsides covered in heart beats in the dark boxes of the canyons. Gotta love it. When do people here wish everyone best of the saeson? I have the feeling that's what happens all year 'round!


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: GUEST,pdq
Date: 12 Dec 03 - 03:20 PM

Yep, I'm tellin' ya Murdoch, these Mud Cats is a dangerous breed. Turn on ya in a heartbeat. Always have yer backside covered, and don't go through no box canyons after dark.


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Peace
Date: 12 Dec 03 - 02:33 PM

My gender is the circle with the arrow.


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Amos
Date: 11 Dec 03 - 09:59 PM

ladimir Horowitz
Played the piano
While picking his nose
And scratching his knees

Psychoanalysis
Failed to dissuade him
As well as the snot
On his clothes and his keys!


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: CarolC
Date: 11 Dec 03 - 09:36 PM

Oops:

As quick or as well
As the snot on his clothes


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: CarolC
Date: 11 Dec 03 - 09:31 PM

This looks like the perfect opportunity to resuscitate (sp?) this old chestnut:

Higgledy Piggledy
Vladimir Horowitz
Played the piano
While (whilst) picking his nose

Psychoanalysis
Failed to dissuade him
As quick or as well
As the snot on his nose


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Dec 03 - 04:39 PM

Dare I ask...what is Brucie's gender?


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Amos
Date: 11 Dec 03 - 02:06 PM

Nuffin' sez ya cain't dream, huh, Brucie?? LOL!

A


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Peace
Date: 11 Dec 03 - 02:02 PM

I hope the women here notice that I am meekly accepting ridicule and abuse because WOMEN ARE NICE. I hope you all will remember the kindly old gentleman who didn't respond to the barbs and jibes--no, he said, "Women are nice." Oh, it's a tough job, but . . . .

From your admirer and worshipper, Brucie (not Bruce).

Desert island, here we come,
Right back where . . . .


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: GUEST,Miss Ogyny
Date: 11 Dec 03 - 01:19 PM

Be that way, Big Bruce. No yum yum for you...


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Amos
Date: 11 Dec 03 - 01:17 PM

Brucie:

Looks like they're about ready to graduate you from third grade, having recited your lessons correctly. When you reach the upper grades, though, you have to take practical as well as theory....

Bruce:

I think that is absolutely so awesome!! I mean -- freaky!! Be afraid, be VERY afraid!!

:>)

A


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 11 Dec 03 - 01:14 PM

"Worshipped" is "horsewhipped" minus one "h" and one "e" and rearranged ever so slightly.

This observation is of no signifigance. It is meant to imply absolutely nothing about society, human relations or religion. It's just an observation. Make of it what you will, but leave me out of it.

Bruce (not Brucie)


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Subject: RE: BS: ! (The thread for the threadless.)
From: Peace
Date: 11 Dec 03 - 12:59 PM

I like women. They are nice. Yeah, and any of you guys who think there's anything wrong with the Women's Institute are WRONG. You guys will be howling at the moon when we get stranded on a desert island. The women from the Institute will remember the kindly old gentleman who said such nice things about them here, and my life will be easier as a result. Women are very nice. They should be worshipped.


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