BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots

Subject: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Amos
Date: 12 Jan 04 - 07:33 PM

Idiots of the world, your Union is here for you!! Join NUI now!! Click here to leartn more.

I knew it had to happen some day...


A

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Alaska Mike
Date: 12 Jan 04 - 07:37 PM

What are you talking about Amos, The NUI has been running this country for the past few years already.

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Walking Eagle
Date: 12 Jan 04 - 07:43 PM

"We have found the enemy, and he is us!" Pogo

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Amos
Date: 12 Jan 04 - 07:49 PM

Right -- fromt he article:

Some Washington insiders insist that no union is necessary because idiots are already over- represented in government.



"From what I've observed, at least 70 percent of federal employees are card-carrying idiots and that goes right up to the Cabinet level," says a Capitol Hill source.



"This is a union without a purpose. It sounds like the organizers are, well, a bunch of idiots."

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Bobert
Date: 12 Jan 04 - 08:21 PM

Yo, Amos,

So like I couldn't figure out how to get an application. I pushed all the buttons here an' all I got was some danged Green Gorilla which chased me 'round the joint fir at least 15 minutes before I had to just unplug the pudder to kill it. Okay, maybe I didn't kill it but it ain't chasin' me no more...

Now, I'll be the first to admit that Iz an idiot! Yup, and proud of it. But now I take exception with that part about being able to use the term "moron" for idiot. No friggin' way in my book. Shoot, bad 'nuff being an idiot without havin' to have to deal with being a moron too!!! Right? Like how many short comin's can one guy handle?
Know what I mean???

This crap wouldn't have happened if it weren't fir Bush. Used to be that we idiots jus' went about livin' our lives, or not! One of my idiot friends, who is no longer with us, didn't read the 37th "Caution" when he bought his new toaster which read "Do not use this toaster in the bathtub or shower." Well, geeze, everyone knows that you don't eat toast in the bathroom! Right?

Okay, I might be an idiot but I also know that the 87th "Caution" on my Pull-on chainsaw that reads, "Do not eat this product" is sound advice. I busted a danged tooth on my third bite full... That one oughtta be like Number One. 'er Three! Not 87th! Like, past 25 or 40 of them "Cautions" an an idiot gonna loose his extension span. That's why thay call 'em extension spans anyway! You is over extended in the tension departement. I ain't stupid, dangit!!!

And, when in doubt, pick C...

And why did the politican cross the road? Hmmmmm? If you were indeed an idiot, you'd know. But, hey, if you don't know, there's still hope fir ya. We got some remedial idiot course comin' up to get yer sorry butts detuned...

Bobert

T

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Amos
Date: 12 Jan 04 - 08:39 PM

Bobert,

While I agree Bush is giving all other idiots a bad name, there's a limit to how much you can blame on the Administration. Trying to eat your chainsaw is beyond that limit.

Amos

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Peace
Date: 12 Jan 04 - 08:44 PM

If it's not running at the time, what's the problem with that?

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Amos
Date: 12 Jan 04 - 09:06 PM

Brucie, Brucie --

Words have meanings. "Eat" for example.

Oh, never mind!! I am descending into insanity here...

Maybe I should pull that application for NUI out of the trash...and send it to you!!


A

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Ebbie
Date: 12 Jan 04 - 09:15 PM

Who was the senator some years back who, when he was labeled a "mediocre" senator, said, "Mediocre people need representation too"?

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Bill D
Date: 12 Jan 04 - 11:09 PM

"Soon, 50 million strong, we will be bigger and have more power than the National Rifle Association and the Teamsters combined."

...isn't it redundant to form an idiots union, when we HAVE those other two?

(think of some of those poor fellows having to keep track of three membership cards!)

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: YorkshireYankee
Date: 12 Jan 04 - 11:39 PM

Oooh, Bill D, good point!!

YY

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River
Date: 12 Jan 04 - 11:56 PM

This is, like, flippin' AMAZING!!!!!! I have watied years for someone to get this idea on the map, eh? I sure hope they decide to analgamate with Canada. We can call the Canadian wing of NUI - C'NUI and make Mr Canoe-Head an honoruable member! I figger if all us idiots get together and act as ONE we will be the biggest and most powerful lobby in Canada and the USA and maybe the world and we will totally, like, run the show and dominate society!!!

Awesome!!! This will mean that the idiots get all the best lookin' girls and the idiots run the government too. This will mean that people like me will do very well.

It doesn't count for retards. Idiots hate retards! I figger we will force all the retards to go to Newfoundland or work at McDonalds flippin burgers, eh, while us idiots live off the fat of the land.

I am gonna join imediately if not sooner!

- BDiBR

p.s. The only bad thing I can see about it is...my brother Don will probably join too. It runs in the family, eh? I'm still ticked at him over New Years. Oh well. He is an idiot, so I can't see them not takin' him, eh? He's in for sure.

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Leadfingers
Date: 13 Jan 04 - 12:02 AM

This is all very well but what about International representation ?

Do you Americans really think you can manage this without European,
and particularly English involvement?

What kind of idiots do you think we are ??

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Jan 04 - 01:04 AM

Good point, Leadfingers. Affirmative Action means nothing if it is not given an international mandate! English, Scottish, Welsh, Irish, and European idiots must press for equal rights, otherwise North American idiots will run the whole show and just get away with murder!

Kind of like what's been already happening for the last while...

Hmmmm. Maybe THAT's why Tony Blair insisted on backing the war in Iraq, despite a very significant lack of popular support in the U.K. He didn't want Britain to be left out in the cold when the idiots take over.

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Cluin
Date: 13 Jan 04 - 02:20 AM

Yeah, but did you know that the word "gullible" is not in any dictionary?

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Amos
Date: 13 Jan 04 - 10:53 AM

And neither is the word "deceitful", Cluin! LOL!

A

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Kim C
Date: 13 Jan 04 - 11:03 AM

I know some people I'd like to sign up for that.

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Steve in Idaho
Date: 13 Jan 04 - 11:52 AM

Must mean there is hope for us all - Praise the Lord -

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Peace
Date: 13 Jan 04 - 12:32 PM

Strong union here. Count me in. Dues are $10.00/year and they can be mailed to Little Hawk. It will help him cover the postage-due on some blowup dolls. Real card-carrying idiots will send the money.

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Peace
Date: 13 Jan 04 - 12:34 PM

Those who don't pay their dues aren't REAL idiots. Don't be fooled by fakes.

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Mark Clark
Date: 13 Jan 04 - 12:39 PM

I believe engineers have their own branch of the NUI. It's called the ENNUI.

      - Mark

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 13 Jan 04 - 12:45 PM

"Idiots" "retards" - pleasant little vocabulary there. How about a few of the other words they throw around in playgrounds, like "Spastic"?

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Amos
Date: 13 Jan 04 - 12:54 PM

Boooo, hissss, MArk Clark!! LOL!

A

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Peace
Date: 13 Jan 04 - 01:09 PM

The term 'idiot' has taken on a generic meaning. I don't think any Catters would use the term retard, even in jest. The whole IQ 'methodology' of arriving at those terms isn't in use by civilized people anymore. I see where you're comin' from, McG of H, but I think no harm was intended with or on this thread. Bruce M.

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 13 Jan 04 - 01:18 PM

I'm quite sure no harm intended by this thread, but pretty soon up came this:

"It doesn't count for retards. Idiots hate retards! I figger we will force all the retards to go to Newfoundland or work at McDonalds flippin burgers, eh, while us idiots live off the fat of the land."

I think we're too close to words like that being used in earnest and to hurt for it to feel too comfortable about using them too freely in play.

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Jan 04 - 01:42 PM

Oh, I just KNEW someone would be offended by the mention of some word that can no longer be mentioned or tolerated in public discussion! Way to go, McGrath. You have risen to the classic defence of the downtrodden wretched of this Earth, without which we might all slide into some sort of hideous morass of blind prejudice, such as afflicted the Earth when Mark Twain wrote offensive books like "Huckleberry Finn". Dreadful stuff!

I say we ban all such words forever...and burn books containing them...until nobody remembers there even was such a word. Then we won't be able to be prejudiced because we won't even understand the concept anymore in the first place.

You understand, I hope, I'm being just a tad sarcastic...

The word "retard", beloved of mouthy teenagers everywhere, is almost always used in conversation to indicate not someone who is actually retarded but merely someone that the teenager wishes to portray as being stupid, uncool, etc.

Greedy people have often been referred to in the common vernacular as "pigs". I guarantee that if real pigs were able to read, write, and speak we would soon have a busy civil rights cause going in the media to discontinue the use of the offensive word "pig" and replace it with some other term...like "porcine individual" or something equally awkward and bloody stupid.

You know what it is, in my opinion? It's a form of fascism that poses as liberalism...and its primary weapon is fear. It is not a true impulse to liberate people, but an impulse to imprison them, regulate them, and establish blind conformity. Lenny Bruce took on all this kind of stuff years ago, and got crucified for being honest enough to do so.

The idea of forming a National Union of Idiots is an amusing satirical attack on the very nature of this sort of velvet fascism which calls itself "affirmative action" and enriches hordes of clever lawyers in the process, as they set out to enforce their modern form of the Inquisition on people.

And the basic principle involved? Never read the book...just look at the cover.

Ignore context, take no notice of intention, be blind to satire or parody, be ignorant of historical or cultural context...just fixate on a particular word in isolation...like "retard" or "n*gger" (the GREAT unmentionable word of the present era)...and then you can happily ban a book like "Huckleberry Finn" and throw it on the fire...or take offense at a post which is obviously intended in the first place to make fun of rather stupid people who habitually refer to other people as "retards"... The clear implication of such a post is: that it is not a good idea to refer to other people as "retards", and it indicates your own stupidity when you do.

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: GUEST,Geno
Date: 13 Jan 04 - 01:44 PM

Sounds like good news to me...I hope the person responsible for deleting my perfectly innocuous thread requesting lyrics to a Bert Jansch song a couple of days ago will join.

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Jan 04 - 01:59 PM

Yeah. :-) Well, I guess such people need a sense of security and solidarity too, eh Gino? And now the NUI is there for them to find it.

It's human intention that is crucial, not the use of this word or that word. However, it takes a lot more mental energy, patience, and thought to analyze and clearly understand someone's intentions than it does to just flip out at the sight of a word.

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Wolfgang
Date: 13 Jan 04 - 02:17 PM

Geno,

your innocuous thread is still there, but all threads with the last post being more than 24 hours ago don't show on the opening page. They always can be refound by using the search facilities on this page.

Wolfgang

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Cluin
Date: 13 Jan 04 - 02:26 PM

When you want it back on the default display of threads with action in the last 24 hours, you make another post in the thread to "refresh" it. That's what I did just now. Good luck, Geno.

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Grab
Date: 13 Jan 04 - 04:30 PM

I'm all for founding the English brand of it. ENNUI. Our motto: "When you're bored with the other options, choose ENNUI."

Graham.

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Jan 04 - 07:22 PM

Exellent, Graham!

The French, who always like to go their own way, could form their own separate version of the NUI...

Plus Union Française des Idiots!   

Which in short form is: PFUI!

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 13 Jan 04 - 07:55 PM

Well, they's idiots an' they's idiots. Now, a don'-know-how-t'-drive idiot ain't th' same as a ignorant-'cause-I-wanna-be-ignorant idiot. An' a bureaucrat-wif-a-thum'-up-his-ass idiot ain't th' same as a watches-too-damm-much-TV idiot.

I am a idiot, but I ain't none of them kindsa idiot I jus' menshunned an' I don' wanna be in any union or organizashun or nuthin' that wud have enny of 'em as members. Them people gives idiocy a bad name.

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Joybell
Date: 13 Jan 04 - 07:58 PM

Did anyone else take a look at the "Kangaroo Lady" on that link. I just love those stories. A surgically made pouch! A real one! I wonder if she'll give her baby boxing lessons? Does she hop around the shopping centre? Thanks Amos. Joy

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Amos
Date: 13 Jan 04 - 08:05 PM

That would be Parleurs de Francaises Union Internationale and rough at that buit the acronym is too good to passup! OR perhaps Personnes Francaises Union des Idiots??

A

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Jan 04 - 08:13 PM

Lovely! Thank you, Amos. Notice how everything sounds so much more sophisticated in French?

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 13 Jan 04 - 08:40 PM

So how about Nigger, Wog, Yid, Slut, Poof? So long as they're just used in play, with no intent to hurt anyone?

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Wolfgang
Date: 14 Jan 04 - 04:11 AM

One difference is that words like nigger, wog, etc. designate quite clearly (with some unclear cases at the boundaries) which subpart of the population is meant, whereas 'idiot' as used here, doesn't. Everybody is free to feel included today and excluded tomorrow by such a designation.

So if I say/post 'I hate idiots' everybody present can feel I mean someone else (and I could tell if asked that nobody who had heard/read that remark was meant). If I'd say 'I hate niggers/wogs/women' I wouldn't sound very convincing if I declared that noone present was meant.

Wolfgang

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 14 Jan 04 - 04:59 AM

The trouble was that, while "idiot" has indeed passed into that kind of generalised meaning, it unintentionally opened the gate to "retard", and that still does have that kind of direct and dismissive reference to a "subpart of the population".

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Gurney
Date: 14 Jan 04 - 05:24 AM

We don't need your johnny-come-lately NUI here in Godzone.
And we have Alf's Imperial Army to keep them out!

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: GUEST,Geno
Date: 14 Jan 04 - 03:37 PM

Wolfgang, Cluin:- Yup, you're both right and I was obviously mistaken. It didn't come up in the search I did, but put that down to my inept computer skills. Apologies for any offence caused! Geno.

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Little Hawk
Date: 14 Jan 04 - 03:58 PM

McGrath...if you use a word in print that denotes prejudice, such as "nigger" or "wop" or "retard" or whatever...and you deliberately place said word in the mouth of a fictitious character who is clearly intended to represent a fool, an idiot, a dimwit of the first order...

The clear intention of doing so IS to point out that such prejudice is wrongful and stupid!!!!!

Why, therefore, do you find it objectionable if you are in fact opposed to such prejudice in the first place?

This, again, was the whole point of Lenny Bruce's satirical humour. I contend that you, like those who charged Lenny Bruce with obscenity, are looking at the cover (reacting to a mere word in isolation) and not reading the book or getting the real message.

There is no word in existence that in itself is so bad that it can never be used anywhere under any circumstances..."slut" included. What do you think the intention was in using the word? If you think the intention was to denigrate retarded people, well, I think you are entirely wrong. I think the intention was to poke fun at and rebuke people who DO denigrate retarded people.

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 14 Jan 04 - 04:09 PM

Be careful where you use that "denigrate" word there, LH. And be very careful about "niggardly".

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Little Hawk
Date: 14 Jan 04 - 04:17 PM

Yeah, right... :-) That's a great example, Bee-dub, of those who react first and think...never. More eager candidates for the NUI.

Sacred cows can be such a pain, but for God's sake don't antagonize their purblind worshippers or they may crucify you or have your eyes plucked out! (in their fervent desire to preserve mercy, kindness, justice, and all that sort of thing...)

How can human beings be this afraid of a mere word? Well, they can. They used to stone people for uttering the word "Jehovah", didn't they?

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 14 Jan 04 - 04:20 PM

In fact I agree that there are no words which can't be used in certain contexts, and you gave an example of how that can be so, when they are put them in the mouth of people, or taken from the mouth of people being satirised.

However "retarded people" I would see as just such a term. I accept that you didn't use it with any such intent, but it an expression that is felt like a blow.

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Little Hawk
Date: 14 Jan 04 - 04:53 PM

Well, yes, I understand that it may hit certain individuals hard to hear a certain word, even in satire. That depends on their own background and what they've dealt with in life, I suppose. One of the great dangers in doing any kind of humorous satire is that you may inadvertently upset various people who either don't get it...or are upset by the material even if they do get it. Actually, I think that is probably unavoidable when doing effective social satire...or political cartoons. You will delight certain people and offend others.

It's a tricky business.

I find it particularly sad that a great book like Huckleberry Finn gets censored, altered, and banned from various places by well-meaning (?) do-gooders who happen to object to the word "nigger" appearing in its pages. Have any of them actually read the book? It's a superb book in every way. Mark Twain was depicting characters (including Jim, a black man of wonderful character) who used the word nigger in normal speech, simply because that was a very ordinary thing to do at that time among those people. It was the way they talked! If one doesn't leave the word in, how is one to know what life was like back then? Furthermore, Jim was one of the finest and most likeable characters in the whole book. Mark Twain was in no way putting down black people in that book.

When the fight against prejudice is waged in such a way as to produce sheer ignorance of the past then it is a fight that is being waged wrongly.

Likewise, requiring model airplane companies to delete the historical swastika marking from their models of WWII German airplanes is of no benefit to Jews whatsoever (despite the fact that some Jews may feel the sight of that symbol as a physical blow...). It is an attempt to deny factual history and suppress real historical information. Denial of reality is not healthy. One needs to know about evil and face it in order to fight it effectively. One cannot know about something if one cannot even bear to LOOK at it. To model the plane with the swastika is NOT to honour Naziism in any way whatsoever, it is simply to build a historically accurate representation of the actual airplane.

God knows, there must have been generations of Native Americans who felt struck by a physical blow whenever they saw the American flag. Their whole way of life was brutally destroyed in the name of that flag. Does that give them the right now to ban it from public use? No.

What goes for the few goes for the many. No one has a right to ban a historical symbol, just because THEY happen to have emotional baggage with regards to it. They have a right to dislike or hate it...but not to ban it. Your freedom to be who you are should not be won at the price of denying someone else's freedom to be who they are. If it is, you don't really believe in freedom, you just believe in being the winner...the one who is in control. And that's what the Nazis believed in, as far as I can see.

I'm not aiming this at you, McGrath, I'm just talking in general terms about a theme which is important to me.

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Joybell
Date: 14 Jan 04 - 05:20 PM

Well I still like the Kangaroo Lady. She chose her path and is comfortable with her title. I'm with you, though Little Hawk, when I'm being serious. Joy

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 14 Jan 04 - 06:47 PM

I quite agree, it's always a mistake to try to pretty up the past, which is why taking the "nigger" out of Huckleberry Finn would be quite wrong, and nonsensical.

The same would be true of the kind of words in a similar context which have been used against people with learning difficulties. And still are.

But in neither case does that mean that we should ever feel casual about using those words as if they still didn't have the power to hurt.
...

The interesting thing is that the original meaning of the word from which "idiot" comes was very much the sense it has in the NUI - someone who doesn't have any understanding of public affairs.

Some way from the statutory meaning given to yje term, as the lowest of the four categiries of Mental Deficiency in the British 1913 Mental Deficiency Act -
Four "classes" of Mental Deficiency were defined:
Idiot ~ unable to protect themselves from common dangers.
Imbecile ~ could protect themselves from common dangers, but unable to take care of themselves.
Feeble-Minded ~ required care to protect themselves.
Moral Defectives ~ criminal or vicious personalities.

(And that last category was taken to include included unmarried mothers...)

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 14 Jan 04 - 06:49 PM

I quite agree, it's always a mistake to try to pretty up the past, which is why taking the "nigger" out of Huckleberry Finn would be quite wrong, and nonsensical.

The same would be true of the kind of words in a similar context which have been used against people with learning difficulties. And still are.

But in neither case does that mean that we should ever feel casual about using those words as if they still didn't have the power to hurt.
...

The interesting thing is that the original meaning of the word from which "idiot" comes was very much the sense it has in the NUI - someone who doesn't have any understanding of public affairs.

Some way from the statutory meaning given to the term, as the lowest of the four categories of Mental Deficiency in the British 1913 Mental Deficiency Act -
Four "classes" of Mental Deficiency were defined:
Idiot ~ unable to protect themselves from common dangers.
Imbecile ~ could protect themselves from common dangers, but unable to take care of themselves.
Feeble-Minded ~ required care to protect themselves.
Moral Defectives ~ criminal or vicious personalities.

(And that last category was taken to include unmarried mothers...)

Subject: RE: BS: Good News: Equal Rights for Idiots
From: Peace
Date: 14 Jan 04 - 08:57 PM

I personally abhor the term 'retarded' when that is applied to people who face varying degress of mental challenge. It is both inaccurate and perjorative. I am a teacher, and for five years I designed programs for and taught kids with special needs. Every school I went to used the term 'special education', and every school I went to used the term 'special needs' by the time I left. People who have children or are themselves a person who has been labelled with the term 'retarded' at one time or another will react very emotionally to the use of the term. I know I do. I was also referred to as being 'stupid' when I was a youngster. I was neither. But one does carry the scars for a lifetime.