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BS: Barbie and Ken separated
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Subject: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: Raptor Date: 18 Feb 04 - 09:22 AM Next The Divorced Barbie: Comes with half of Kens shit! Same sex Barbie Comes with a partner that you can share clothes with! Modern American Barbie Comes with Silicom implants Botox Injection, a prosac prescription, And believes that there were weapons of mass destruction! Raptor |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: Rapparee Date: 18 Feb 04 - 09:26 AM Barbie: Ken, I think we should spend some time apart. Ken: Wha? Huh? Bring me a beer, willya? Barbie: I'm leaving you, Ken. I want to think out our relationship. Ken: (burp) Huh? Barbie: You heard me. I'll call you next week. (door slams, car starts) Ken: Hmmmm... (dials phone). Hi! Larry? She's gone. C'mon over. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: Morticia Date: 18 Feb 04 - 09:30 AM Why did Barbie never get pregnant? Because Ken comes in a separate box. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: GUEST,MC Fat Date: 18 Feb 04 - 09:57 AM More likely cos he doesn't have a willie and she doesn't have a fa... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: Bee-dubya-ell Date: 18 Feb 04 - 10:13 AM Hell, I don't blame Ken for wantin' out. Barbie always gets all the cool stuff like the Dreamhouse and the sports cars. What has Ken ever gotten? A tennis racket? Shit, if I were him I woulda been gone long ago. Anyway, there's that new series of dolls called "Brats" and they're all a buncha slutty hoe-bags. A guy like Ken can probably have his way with as many of them as he wants. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: GUEST,MC Fat Date: 18 Feb 04 - 10:17 AM Yeah he can hang out with the dirty 'hoes' now |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: wysiwyg Date: 18 Feb 04 - 10:26 AM If Ken = khandu Who's Barbie then? ~S~ |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: Cluin Date: 18 Feb 04 - 12:34 PM Little girl playing with a couple of dolls, pretending they're going on a big date, whispering, hugging, kissing, etc. Mom notices right away one of them is Barbie. But on closer inspection, she sees the other one is her son's G.I. Joe doll. "What are you doing with your brother's G.I. Joe doll--I mean action figure--, dear?" asks the mother. "Barbie comes with Ken." "Nuh UH, mom," replies the girl, not looking up. "Barbie comes with G.I. Joe. She fakes it with Ken." |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: Herga Kitty Date: 18 Feb 04 - 03:18 PM OK so you can't now just toss another Ken on the Barbie? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: Nemesis Date: 18 Feb 04 - 05:05 PM According the couple's business manager, Russell Arons, vice-president of marketing at Mattel, said they feel: "it's time to spend some quality time apart but they will remain friends." Arons denied there was any truth in the rumour the breakup was linked to the Cali Girl Barbie, arriving in stores. To reflect her single status Barbie will wear shorts and a bikini top, metal hoop earrings and have a deeper tan. Arons hinted the break up may be due to Ken's reluctance to get married despite Barbie getting a new wedding dress every year. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: Cluin Date: 18 Feb 04 - 05:09 PM Remain friends? What else were they when neither of them had any genitals to be anything else. Barbie didn't even have any nips for Ken to nibble on. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: Rapparee Date: 18 Feb 04 - 06:28 PM I always thought that Ken was gay. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: Jeanie Date: 18 Feb 04 - 06:49 PM Has anyone else here ever heard Monni Aldous of Romford Folk Club sing her hilarious Barbie song, "Nothing Down Below" ? If not...I'll see if I can get the lyrics and post them. - jeanie |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: Liz the Squeak Date: 18 Feb 04 - 07:02 PM Having been present when the Swan Lake Ken, masquerading as Daniel was purchased today, and having been subjected to removal of all his clothes, I can confirm that both "male" and "female" dolls come with moulded underpants. Barbie has a fetching set with flowers "embossed" on it (sometimes painted a virginal white) and Ken has something akin to a jockstrap or Yfront. You can also get a pregnant 'Barbie' but I think it's one of her friends. LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: IvanB Date: 18 Feb 04 - 09:36 PM If Barbie thinks Ken is afraid of commitment, does she think Lance the surfer will be any better? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: Wilfried Schaum Date: 19 Feb 04 - 03:55 AM Cluin - Serves Ken right. Never have seen the silly dodger in BDU. Jeanie - Please do. Wilfried |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: Walking Eagle Date: 19 Feb 04 - 04:04 AM I guess all the pro-family right wingers will go into mourning. Wait, they weren't married! They only remained uncommitted for 40 years. I wonder what BushRove will have to say about this? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: Sandra in Sydney Date: 19 Feb 04 - 07:30 AM I remember back in my younger days reading a snippet about Barbie in Readers Digest which my parents subscribed to for a few years in the 60's or early 70's. A father wrote to Mattel asking when they would be putting out a shroud as he was tired of constantly buying all the clothing & accesssories that his daughter wanted. sandra, who never owned a Barbie as a child - I had a Sindy instead! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: Wilfried Schaum Date: 02 Mar 04 - 11:14 AM And now all this shall be over and gone? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: Wilfried Schaum Date: 02 Mar 04 - 11:30 AM ... or this ... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: Peace Date: 02 Mar 04 - 12:05 PM I am having a heckuva time getting on to the Mudcat site. I can't reach the systems people. JOE, HELP. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: Jeanie Date: 02 Mar 04 - 03:21 PM I've passed on a message to Joe to alert him to Brucie's computer plight (again). My technical opinion: this is what you get for spending too long looking at Wilfried's pictures of Barbie & Ken. Not enough megabytes to take the strain. Blew a fuse after Picture No. 31 ;) - jeanie
-Joe Offer- |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: Liz the Squeak Date: 02 Mar 04 - 06:54 PM If ~Ken and Barbie never married, how come you can get about 50 different designs of wedding dress for her? LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: GUEST Date: 02 Mar 04 - 07:05 PM If anyone else out there was harangued enough into buying the Swan Lake Barbie for Christmas........how do I change the batteries when the wings stop lighting up? Box and instructions chucked out, wings unlighting, can't even see where a battery would go....although I would love to ram it somewhere suitable. And what sort of battery? As I handed over the extortionate amount of money to buy this, I knew this would happen one day. And I didn't even get the praise, as Santa "delivered" it down the chimney...........Good old Santa eh? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: GUEST,Katie Date: 17 Jul 04 - 07:02 PM Barbie: Ken I'm going to the store feed the cat call my work tell them I"ll be in monday and don"t for get the partys to marrow. Ken:(reading the news paper)UUU O.k. ______________________________________________________________________ 2 houres latter Barbie:(looking for ken) Ohh there you are look I bout you some thing Ken:OOO O.K. ______________________________________________________________________ The next day Barbie:(putting makeup on in the bathroom at the reunuen talking to mige)My husbands the best husband in the world (walks out side the bathroom Sees Ken Dansing with Skipper)KEEN! Ken:WHAT Barbie:I hate you where maried and we have a kid and your kissing my sister Ken I'm not just kissing her for no reason I'm dating her Barbie I hate you so I'm going to devors you and I'm tacking my baby Ken o.k your sister hotter |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: SINSULL Date: 17 Jul 04 - 07:18 PM You guys are so far behind the times. First of all, Barbie has a new "mate", a guy from Australia names Keith or Kevin or some other "K" name. No kidding, Mattel even announced the Barbie-Ken breakup. Second, she has given up on wedding gowns and gone for black leather and whips - again, no kidding, a Cat Woman Barbie that has some people all in a snit. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: Georgiansilver Date: 17 Jul 04 - 07:43 PM Not sure if anyone noticed the Barbie/seagull thread or not but if I were Ken I would leave Barbie sharpish..apparently her leg has been amputated in favour of a seagull! Be Blessed. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: jack halyard Date: 17 Jul 04 - 08:08 PM Barbie and Ken separated? I wondered who the siamese twins were! Did you hear about the bloke who tried to separate a siamese cat? Jack Halyard. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: SINSULL Date: 17 Jul 04 - 08:08 PM Is this in any wy related to the story about the lobsterman who dressed a lobster in old Barbie clothes and set it free knowing that it would turn up in someone else's trap? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: Q (Frank Staplin) Date: 18 Jul 04 - 12:27 AM All the Barbies are news readers on CNN. Wolf Blitzer has taken Ken's place. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: Amos Date: 18 Jul 04 - 12:35 AM The guy who tried to separate the Siamese Cat was an old shipmate of mine who was always one or two cards short of a deck, name of Claude Bohlz. He was no success in the engine room, either!! :>)) A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: GUEST,Art Thieme Date: 18 Jul 04 - 09:53 PM Why, were the siamese twins?? I once saw siamese twins fighting and tried to separate 'em. They weren't happy about it. And both died on the table. Art |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: Jeanie Date: 19 Jul 04 - 04:44 AM Straight off the press from my daughter's latest copy of "Heat" magazine ("This week's hottest celebrity news"): "Barbie's been feeling lonely since she dumped her long-term boyfriend Ken earlier this year. So we're delighted to announce that the beautiful blonde has a new man in her life in the shape of hunky blond Australian surfer dude Blaine. Swoon." Ken long-term ? That's the understatement of the year. No wonder she finally dumped the chap - clearly a severe case of commitment angst. Barbie's new bloke looks to be everything you would imagine a "Blaine" to be. I can't see him taking Barbie down the aisle, either. I wonder how many meetings and brainstorming sessions, marketing surveys and so on it took before the manufacturers decided on "Blaine" as the optimum selling name ? - jeanie |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: Dave Bryant Date: 19 Jul 04 - 10:53 AM As far as separation goes - it's Barbie's fault - she just can't separate her thighs enough ! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: GUEST,Barbie (herself) Date: 19 Jul 04 - 12:09 PM Well, there you go again! Blaming me. Like it's my fault that that former stud Ken comes up to me one day and says, "I want to talk with you." And I go, like, "Okay." And he goes, like, "I've enjoyed being with you more than I have ever done anything before, but I want you to know that I've always felt that I was really a woman trapped inside a man's body, ya know? So I'm getting this operation." And I'm, like, you know, flattened? So anyway, he leaves me and I'm like, despondent. So I check into Betty Ford, 'cause I'm like, doin' everything, ya know? I mean grass, 'ludes, meth, booze, crystal, the whole thing, ya know? Even tobacco. So I'm like 350 pounds and really, really gross. But Betty Ford straightened me out and I regained my original shape without too much trouble. My skins kinda like, you know, sort of plastic. Anyway, one day I'm down on the beach, just kickin' back after a hard day at work, and this stud , this absolute STUD, sort of magically appears. I mean, first I thought it was a flashback, ya know? But he's real and his name is Blaihn, but like later I find out he's from Oz and is really named "Blaine". Blond Blaine, the Sidney Surfer Stud. Anyway, it's like WHAM! and I'm ready to skip outa my thong right there on the beach, ya know? Anyway, Blaine and me, we scoot over to my place and we go to it everywhere, I mean everywhere. Only, not really, 'cause neither of us is, ya know, like, built for the old you-know-what, ya know? We're like, missing some parts. So we do what we can, and it's like, the first time for me all over again, if you know what I mean. So I see Ken a couple days ago, when I'm with Blaine, and like Ken doesn't see me. But he's wearin' a really short skirt and has obviously had these, you know, injections, and he's standing on the curb in high high heels calling to passing men, you know? So Blaine went up and said "'ello, Mate" and Ken said "Want some of this?" and Blaine turned and pointed to me and said, "Bloody 'ell, mate, what for? When I've got that ta keep me warm?" And I waved to Ken and he nearly died! And Blaine and I got into my car we roared off, laughing like crazy. It's cool to be a Cali Girl! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: semi-submersible Date: 20 Jul 04 - 05:06 AM Must be fifteen years ago a little girl told me, "This is Barbie. She was married three times. This is her boyfriend Ken. He's only been married two times." I think the dolls were waiting for Barbie's latest divorce to come through. I managed to say, "Oh." I'm glad she wasn't watching my face. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: JennyO Date: 20 Jul 04 - 09:50 AM What sort of a dumb name is Blaine? Coming from Sydney Australia myself, I can honestly say I have NEVER heard this name before. But maybe if he gets a little excited, she can say chill-Blaine. Duhh.. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: Amos Date: 20 Jul 04 - 10:03 AM Guest Barbie herself: ROTFLMAO! A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: GUEST,Larry K Date: 20 Jul 04 - 03:08 PM Barbie was created in 1959 by Elliot and Ruth Handler and named after their two children- Ken and Barbra. Therefore, Ken and Barbie are really brother and sister and can't be married or it is even a bigger scandal. A few facts. 9 out of 10 girls claim they once owned a Barbie. They have sold over 500,000,000 Barbies or accessories- a rate of 2 per second. Mattel is the 4th largest clothes maker in the USA because of Barbie. Her proportional measurments would be 39-21-33. Fairly tough to achieve in real life. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: GUEST,Guest(not that guest) Date: 03 Aug 04 - 05:53 PM refreshing random threads for giggles. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: GUEST,short but sweet Date: 09 Aug 04 - 09:50 AM I don't blame barbie for leaveing him ken does nothing he just sits there doing not a thing barbie has more things to do than help ken barbie has 10,000,000,000,000 jobs to do (helping ken is not one of them) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: Peace Date: 09 Aug 04 - 04:36 PM As to the title of this august thread, has anyone notified the Krazy Glue company? Might have had a bad lot. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: GUEST,kayla and haley(her cuz) Date: 24 Oct 04 - 01:15 AM KEN IS GAY!WE CANT BELIEVE IT!WE WONT BELIEVE IT!MY CUZ WAS LIKE"OMG NO WAY" AND I WAS LIKE JUST BELIEVE IT.MY CUZ WAS LIKE "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: Mrs.Duck Date: 24 Oct 04 - 12:32 PM I believe Barbie and Ken split up after she found him with the other 'actress' who plays the pauper in the film and didn't buy his line that they looked so much alike he didn't know the difference - yeah right like ones blonde and the others a brunette!!!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Barbie and Ken separated From: YorkshireYankee Date: 25 Oct 04 - 10:50 AM I have a neice who enjoys playing Barbie with a playmate whose family is fairly religious. My brother overheard them one day (they were about 5-6 years old): Friend: God made everything. Neice: Everything? Friend: Everything... even Barbie! Neice: (turning Barbie over and looking at the words molded into the plastic) No... I think she's made in Taiwan. |
