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Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies

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Flash Company 20 Jul 12 - 11:08 AM
GUEST 19 Jul 12 - 10:32 PM
GUEST 29 Jun 11 - 07:17 PM
GUEST 24 Sep 10 - 03:18 PM
GUEST,Seonaid 22 Sep 10 - 06:14 PM
Joe_F 22 Sep 10 - 06:07 PM
dick greenhaus 22 Sep 10 - 05:21 PM
GUEST 22 Sep 10 - 05:13 PM
GUEST,Seonaid 17 Sep 10 - 05:31 PM
GUEST,Seonaid 17 Sep 10 - 05:28 PM
GUEST,Seonaid 17 Sep 10 - 05:26 PM
Ibbel 17 Sep 10 - 02:22 AM
Tradsinger 16 Sep 10 - 06:21 PM
Tradsinger 16 Sep 10 - 06:18 PM
Bettynh 16 Sep 10 - 04:10 PM
Bettynh 16 Sep 10 - 04:07 PM
GUEST,lompocan 16 Sep 10 - 03:49 PM
Sandy Paton 26 Apr 05 - 10:13 PM
YorkshireYankee 26 Apr 05 - 04:20 PM
Wrinkles 25 Apr 05 - 04:25 PM
GUEST,Songster Bob 25 Apr 05 - 02:41 PM
aussiebloke 01 Jun 04 - 01:57 AM
YorkshireYankee 31 May 04 - 12:29 PM
GUEST,Bex McK 31 May 04 - 10:10 AM
GUEST,Art Thieme 30 May 04 - 03:41 PM
Nigel Parsons 30 May 04 - 04:19 AM
Nigel Parsons 20 May 04 - 01:31 PM
Amos 20 May 04 - 01:17 PM
JennyO 20 May 04 - 11:32 AM
Splott Man 20 May 04 - 03:38 AM
LindsayInWales 19 May 04 - 07:18 PM
LindsayInWales 19 May 04 - 07:13 PM
beardedbruce 19 May 04 - 04:45 PM
wigan 19 May 04 - 04:32 PM
Big Al Whittle 19 May 04 - 03:51 PM
GUEST,Larry K 19 May 04 - 09:21 AM
Mark Cohen 19 May 04 - 05:52 AM
GUEST,Sylvia 19 May 04 - 04:25 AM
Forsh 25 Mar 04 - 03:56 PM
GUEST,Forsh 25 Mar 04 - 03:49 PM
weerover 25 Mar 04 - 11:57 AM
Schantieman 25 Mar 04 - 10:55 AM
GUEST,Buddy Horny 25 Mar 04 - 10:36 AM
GUEST 25 Mar 04 - 08:41 AM
Dead Horse 24 Mar 04 - 11:36 AM
Dead Horse 24 Mar 04 - 11:05 AM
Rapparee 24 Mar 04 - 09:38 AM
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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: Flash Company
Date: 20 Jul 12 - 11:08 AM

Oh where have you been today Lord Randall my son?
Oh where have you been today, my darling one?
OUT!!!!

FC


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: GUEST
Date: 19 Jul 12 - 10:32 PM

There is more to Don't cry lady...

I only remember one verse...

Hurrah, hurrah, my uncle's going to be hurt,
Hurrah, hurrah, the dirty rotten (forgot this work),
For he was very free with me when I was just a squirt,
Hurrah, they're going to hurt my uncle.

The verses go through all the family..Sung to "Marching through Georgia" I remember one of the folk singers singing it at Swarthmore in the 60's. I remember who sang it, but that's a secret!


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: GUEST
Date: 29 Jun 11 - 07:17 PM

Her hair hung over her shoulder.
Tied up with a black rubber dand


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: GUEST
Date: 24 Sep 10 - 03:18 PM

Other last lines to "Anniversary Waltz":

...We danced and we danced
'Cos there wasn't any bed.

...I needed a wife
Like a hole in the head.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: GUEST,Seonaid
Date: 22 Sep 10 - 06:14 PM

We can always recycle the oldies to good purpose, especially whenever there's a big Broadway/West End revival, or re-release of an old movie.
And then there are those items that scarcely require a reference. Even among the young and untutored, over the years I've got a lot of mileage out of the opening bars of "Love is a many-gendered thing..."


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: Joe_F
Date: 22 Sep 10 - 06:07 PM

Oh, how we danced
On the night we were wed!
We danced and we danced
Till we fell out of bed.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: dick greenhaus
Date: 22 Sep 10 - 05:21 PM

Innaresting. Seems like the age-old practice of parodying the lyrics of pop songs is dying out....as, one might say, are the lyrics of pop songs.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: GUEST
Date: 22 Sep 10 - 05:13 PM

To the tune of "Sing a Song of Cities" --

'Twas only an old beer bottle, a-flaoting on the foam,
'Twas only an old beer bottle, a million miles from home;
Inside there was a paper, these words were written on:
"Whoever finds this bottle will find the beer all gone!"


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: GUEST,Seonaid
Date: 17 Sep 10 - 05:31 PM

(Always proofread before sending --)
That should have shown three repeats of "Hang down your head."
"Hand down" gives it a whole new meaning, though ...
just in time for Halloween!


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: GUEST,Seonaid
Date: 17 Sep 10 - 05:28 PM

Oh -- and from the Smothers Brothers:

"Hand down your head, Tom Dooley,
Hand down your head and cry;
Hang down your head, Tom Dooley,
Your tie's caught in your fly."


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: GUEST,Seonaid
Date: 17 Sep 10 - 05:26 PM

One or two loose bits --

"Her eyes, they shone like the rhinestones,
And she was no friend of the pope,
And her hair hung out of her armpits
Tied up with a great hunk of rope."

"I'm in the mood [or nude!] for love,
Simply because you're near me,
Funny butt...!"

"Nobody loves you when you're old and gay..."

"It's Howdy Doody time,
It isn't worth a dime,
So change to Channel 9
And look at Frankenstein."

"I love to go a-wandering
Across the mountain track,
And since I'm over ninety-three,
I can't find my way back."

"Ist das nicht ein Schnitzelbank?
Nein."


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: Ibbel
Date: 17 Sep 10 - 02:22 AM

Jack and Jill went up the hill
And on the top he caught her
Jill forgot to take her pill
And now they have a daughter


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: Tradsinger
Date: 16 Sep 10 - 06:21 PM

Oh yes:

"You made me love you, you woke me up to do it, you woke me up to do it"

Tradsinger


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: Tradsinger
Date: 16 Sep 10 - 06:18 PM

Songs from the shows:

"I'm just a girl who can't say n...n....nn...@

"I've thrown a custard in her face"

"Unforgettable, that's...........er..."

From the folk world:

"The rain is softly falling and the Oggie man is still there@

"The time passes over more cheerful and gay, since we've learnt a new song to drive thousands away"

There are more which I will think of in time.

Tradsinger


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: Bettynh
Date: 16 Sep 10 - 04:10 PM

From Barry Lewis Polisar:

Oh my name is Hiram Lipschlitz
And my problem's pretty clear...


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: Bettynh
Date: 16 Sep 10 - 04:07 PM

I learned this from a book when I was a kid (I was a weird kid):

To the tune of "Old Oaken Bucket":

The old family toothbrush
The old family toothbrush
That moss-covered toothbrush
We all knew so well

Father abused it
Mother misused it
Sister refused it
And now it is mine


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: GUEST,lompocan
Date: 16 Sep 10 - 03:49 PM

A friend posted this on facebook in response to someone's moan of the pAins of heartburn...

(Sounds of Silence)
"Hello heartburn, my old friend, you've come to haunt me once again; because a feeling's softly churning, and my esophagus is burning; and the vision of me puking out my brains, still remains, within the pain of heartburn.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: Sandy Paton
Date: 26 Apr 05 - 10:13 PM

Stan Kelly, in London, 1957, sang:

We live in the attic and we pay no rent
And it's all very kind of Jesus.

(Complete song)

Gwynne Gardner, who works for us at Folk-Legacy, made up this parody (with her sister's help) back in the 1950s when they were both kids. You young 'uns probably know the melody, but I only know it as "Ta ra ra boom de-ay." Anyway, here's their song:

It's Howdy Doody time
The show ain't worth a dime
And as for Uncle Bob,
He does a lousy job.
And as for Howdy Doody,
He is a tootie fruitie.
It is a crummy show,
Let's let them know.... pfffft! (Bronx cheer)

A fifth grader in Waterbury, Connecticut, gave us this re-write of the Mickey Mouse song about 20 years ago:
    Melvin Moose, Melvin Moose,
    Forever let us hold our antlers high.
    Come along and hanve some fun
    And eat some grass with me.
    M-E-L - V-I-N -   M-O-O-S-E!


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: YorkshireYankee
Date: 26 Apr 05 - 04:20 PM

John Jacob Jingleheimer Smith
His name is my name, too
Whenever we go out, the people always shout,
"There goes John Jacob Jingleheimer Smith!"
Dada dada dadada...
Second verse, same as the first -- a little bit louder and a whole lot worse...

Learned at Girl Scout camp. Actually, not sure whether it counts as a very short song, or a very long one...

Then there's this gem by Keith Donnelly:

I had a cat named Whiskey
He was a pretty kitty
He did ablutions everywhere, which made the house... not pretty
Then he got runned over by a bus
By heck that must have tickled
I could not bear to have him stuffed, and so I had him pickled
Musha ring dumma do damma da
Whack fall ma daddy oh, whack fall ma daddy oh...
There's Whiskey in the jar!


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: Wrinkles
Date: 25 Apr 05 - 04:25 PM

Don't know where it originated, but this is the theme tune for Ulsterfolk with jewish ancestry;

"Where the Mountains of Mourn sweep down to the sea,
My yiddisher mamma is waiting for me"

and a parody of mine own;

I left my heart in San Fancisco
I left my knees in Timbuktu
I left my brain in Bulowayo
but my bowels I give to you!

wrinkles


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: GUEST,Songster Bob
Date: 25 Apr 05 - 02:41 PM

Tune: Jealousy

"Entropy! Why ... must ...... there ....... be ......" (in diminishing volume, effort, and wakefulness -- sometimes followed with the sound of snoring).

Bob


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: aussiebloke
Date: 01 Jun 04 - 01:57 AM

To the tune of Miria - from Paint Your Wagon


Away out here, they got a name
for wind and rain and fire
The rain is Tess, the fire Joe
and they call the wind: The Wind.

Cheers all

aussiebloke


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: YorkshireYankee
Date: 31 May 04 - 12:29 PM

Sorry LF, don't have any "one- or two-liners", but maybe these'll do...

Heard someone sing this when I was in high school & thought it was pretty funny:

This land is my land
This land ain't your land
If you don't get off
I'll blow your head off
I got a shotgun
And you ain't got one...
This land was made for me, not you!

Did a Google to find the author & found this site, which has the rest of the parody (I didn't know there was more), & says it was written by David Pratter.


Then there's this very short one by Keith Donnelly (who is absoloutely *brilliant*; if you ever get a chance to see him live, don't pass it up!)

I'm a bicycle lamp and I've been around
I've covered this road from Guildford to Godalming town
Travellin' light... I'm a travellin' light

Cheers,

YY


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: GUEST,Bex McK
Date: 31 May 04 - 10:10 AM

This land is your land
But it once was my land
After we sold you Manhattan Island
You put my nation on a reservation
This land was made for you and me


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: GUEST,Art Thieme
Date: 30 May 04 - 03:41 PM

Missing from ALL of these are our sources. Where they came from. Why they came to be and when. What might've been happening then that made the little parody current. All the above. --------- The "Hangman Hangman" parody sited above is from the Smothers Brothers---as I the Streets Of Laredo parody.

That said, here are a few:

I'm gonna sit right down and write myself a Bible,
And make believe it came from God...(Don't know where I heard that.)
-------------

This land was made for you and me---------and my R.C. (From kids in the schoolyard at Morris School in Chicago---1977)
-------------

We three kings from sloppy Joe's bar... (From my wife Carol's childhood in Toledo, Ohio.)

--------------

One ton tomato,
Don't ear a one ton tomato... (from a humorous singer/songwriter named Mike Farrow? in Chicago about 1979.)

---------------

Fry me a live--fry me a liver,
I fried a liver for you.   (parody of a song that was a hit for Julie London in the 1950s.)

-------------

I believe if I saw my wife again,
I'd still be here with you. (from the Utah Phillips' song)

------------------

Touch me when I'm bowling,
Touch me when I'm snowmobiling,
When I'm cleaning the cat litter,
Surprise me with your hands,
And lightly,
With kung-fu,
Touch me.       (from Utah Phillips' song "Touch Me")

----------------

It's knowing I can get some snatch
Without having to commit to you at all,
That makes me leave my sleeping bag
Rolled up and stashed behind your couch...   

(A one-verse parody I put together when I was the regular singer on the stemboat Julia Belle Swain. John Hartford, who piloted the boat quite often, and who wrote the original, did not think it was real funny.)


-------------------

Richard Nixon's the name and I won every damn campaign,
Stonewalled congress's game and tore up the yapes again,
In the summer of '74 they were angry and demanding more,
By August 8th I had to tell 'cause a tape can remember all too well.

On the night that they drove old Dickie down,
All the people were singing,
On the night that they drove old Dickie down,
Dan Rather was jeering,

He went, "Naaa,na,na,na,na--naaaa, na, na, na, na,
Na, na, na,na, nan naaaa, na, na !!!"

(A tale of Watergate---1970s. I heard it sung around Chicago---maybe Freddy Holstein or Michael Cooney.)

----------------

Oh your mother is old,
Amd your father is dead,
And your brother is dead,
And your brother is dead,
And your brother is dead,
And your kid has one leg,
And your wife is a drunk
And your car doesn't float !

(I heard this from ....... ...... after an incident on Chappequidic Island off Massachusetts. tune: The Irish Washerwoman)

----------------


This land is their land,
It is not our land,
From the plush apartments,
To the Cadillac car land,
From the Wall Street office,
To the Hollywood star land,
This land is not for you and me !

(from the BOSS'S SONGBOOK ---1960s

------------------


The miners came in '49,
The whores in '51,
Ten they got together
And they made a Native Son.

(A California song from the 19th century.)

---------------

Yah, sir, he's my Arafat,
No, sir, I don't mean chicken fat,
Yah, sir, he's my Arafat now.

(tune: "Yes, Sir, She's my Baby" I got this from a couple in Minnesots---a Palestinian girl had married a Minnesotan. They named their kid "Yah,Sir, You Betcha" ;-)

---------------

Don't cry ladies,
I'll buy your goddam pencils,
Don't cry ladies,
Your apples too,
Don't cry ladies,
Take off those dark brown glasses,
Hello, mother, I knew it was you.

(Frank Hamilton sang this in a concert for the University Of Illinois Folksong Club at Navy Pier--Chicago---1962.)

-------------------

If you've never been the lover of a landlady's daughter,
Then you cannot have another piece of pie""

(I heard Jo Mapes sing this in Chicago as the shortesr song she knew. circa 1961.)

-------------------

You can give marriage a whirl
If you've got enough in your purse,
But no matter what you do marry a Texas gal,
'Cause no matter what happens -- she's seen worse.

(I heard Pete Seeger sing this around 1956 at a Northwestern University concert with Pete and Big Bill Broonzy.)

-----------------

What was your name in the states,
Was it Jackson or Thompson or Bates,
Did you flee for your life,
Did you murder your wife,
Oh, what was your name in the states.

(a song of early California referring to the fact that many of those in the gold fields were people with a past who were forced to go West.)

Hope this helps.

Art Thieme


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Subject: Lyr Add: Foggy Dew (parody)
From: Nigel Parsons
Date: 30 May 04 - 04:19 AM

BATCHELOR'S SONG.
unattributed


When I was a Batchelor I lived in a tin with a hundred bright green peas
My grandmother said to keep from sin you must not part from these
But then one day the lid came off Horizons loomed in view
And a very obscene little brown baked bean said "I'm coming in with you".

I said to the little obscene baked bean I like your flipping sauce
To which she said "I'm very well bred Heinz 57 of course"
She wept, she cried, she damned near fried and said "What shall I do?
So I pulled her in the can just to save her from the pan and the threat of the Irish stew.

Now I am a Batchelor I live in a can with a hundred khaki peans
And when I clap my hands they march around the can singing we're a lot of in-betweens
Reminds me of the bad old days when I lived with my bright green brothers
Now I'm doing very nice just ignoring the advice given me by my grandmother.



Taken from the Bangor (N.Wales) Scout & Guide club songbook (pub March 1970)

NP


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: Nigel Parsons
Date: 20 May 04 - 01:31 PM

"They drink their 'Guinness & Cider'
And then the performers all stand.
With two Guitars, a fiddle & bodhran
They call them the "Black Velvet Band""

Nigel


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: Amos
Date: 20 May 04 - 01:17 PM

A Song of Fleas

Adam
Had 'em



A


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: JennyO
Date: 20 May 04 - 11:32 AM

Rather than "The Boy Stood On the Burning Deck", this one from my dad:

The boy stood in the banquet hall
When all but he had fled
He'd finished off the cakes and jam
And nearly done the bread.

"This is my thirteenth cup of tea!"
He cried in accents wild
"Just one more crust, before I ****"
He was a vulgar child.

There came a burst of thunder sound
The boy, oh where was he?
Just ask the maids who swept him up
All cakes, and jam, and tea.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: Splott Man
Date: 20 May 04 - 03:38 AM

A variation I heard was..

Take care of your web-footed friends
For that duck may be somebody's mother
He lives in the stream by the swamp
Where the weather is awfully domp
Well you may think that this is the end
Well it's not and to prove that I'm no liar
I'll sing it to you once again
Only this time it'll be a little higher

Then you do sing it again, a tone and a half higher

Repeat until almost out of range

then do Lindswinder's verse

regards

Splott man


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: LindsayInWales
Date: 19 May 04 - 07:18 PM

and something my father sang in Florida in 1943 as a RAF Cadet undergoing flying training:

Take care of your web-footed friends
For that duck may be somebody's mother
He lives in the stream by the swamp
Where the weather is awfully domp
Well you may think that this is the end
Well it is


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: LindsayInWales
Date: 19 May 04 - 07:13 PM

The boy stood on the burning deck
When all but he had fled...
TWIT !!


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: beardedbruce
Date: 19 May 04 - 04:45 PM

From an Alan Sherman album...
Shticks Of One Kind And Half A Dozen Of The Other
[parody of "Molly Malone"]
She wheels her wheelbarrow
Through streets that are narrow,
Her barrow is narrow, her hips are too wide.
So wherever she wheels it,
The neighborhood feels it,
Her girdle keeps scraping the homes on each side.
In Dublin's fair city,
Where girls are so pretty,
My Molly stands out 'cause she weighs 18 stone.
(That's 256 pounds.)
I don't mind her fat--but,
It's not only that--but,
She's cockeyed and muscle-bound, Molly Malone.

[parody of "Auld Lang Syne"]
I know a man, his name is Lang,
And he has a neon sign.
And Mister Lang is very old,
So they call it Old Lang's Sign.

[parody of "Billy Boy"]
Oh what have you done, Billy Sol, Billy Sol.
Oh what have you done, charming Billy.
You took almost every cent
From the U.S. Government,
Which you spent on fertilizer, which is silly.

[parody of "Mary-Anne"]
All day, all night, Cary Grant.
That's all I hear from my wife, is Cary Grant.
What can he do that I can't?
Big deal, big star, Cary Grant.


[parody of "On The Banks Of The Wabash" by George J. Gaskin]
Oh the moon is bright tonight upon the car wash.
So I'm having my Volkswagen washed again.
But the way things go with me, the way my luck is,
Just as soon as they're finished, it will rain.

[parody of "On Top Of Old Smokey" by The Weavers]
On top of Old Smokey,
All covered with hair,
Of course I'm referring
To Smokey The Bear.

[parody of "Aura Lee"]
Every time you take vaccine,
Take it orally.
As you know the other way
Is more painfully.
[parody of "Grandfather's Clock" by The Haydn Quartet]
My grandfather's clock was the best ever made
By the Timex company.
Just like the clock John Cameron Swayze displayed
Last night on the old TV.
Oh it works under water so perfectly,
And still makes a ticking sound.
Which my grandfather tried only this afternoon,
And that's how the old man drowned.

[parody of "Comin' Thru' The Rye" by Nellie Melba]
Do not make a stingy sandwich.
Pile the cold cuts high.
Customers should see salami
Coming through the rye.




[parody of Stephen Foster's "Polly Wolly Doodle"]
Oh I diet all day and I diet all night,
It's enough to drive me bats.
Got no gravy or potatoes,
'Cause the whole refrigerator's
Fulla polyunsaturated fats.
Fare thee well, Metrecal,
And the others of that ilk.
Let the diet start tomorrow,
'Cause today I'll drown my sorrow
In a double malted milk.

[parody of "Down By The Riverside"]
When you go to the delicatessen store,
Don't buy the liverwurst.
Don't buy the liverwurst.
Don't buy the liverwurst.
I repeat what I just said before,
Don't buy the liverwurst.
Don't buy the liverwurst.
Oh buy the corned beef if you must,
The pickled herring you can trust,
And the lox puts you in orbit AOK.
But that big hunk of liverwurst
Has been there since October First,
And today is the Twenty-Third of May.
So when you go to the delicatessen store,
Don't buy the liverwurst.
Don't buy the liverwurst.
Don't buy the liverwurst.
It'll make your insides awful sore.
Don't buy the liverwurst.
Don't buy the liverwurst.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: wigan
Date: 19 May 04 - 04:32 PM

one i wrote cos i can't sing,
tune hole in the elephants bottom
i went to join a folk club
ambitions at singing i'd got em
but when i started to croon
it was so out of tune
that the audience said it was rotten.

plenty more where that came from, but i've already got my coat


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: Big Al Whittle
Date: 19 May 04 - 03:51 PM

heard in a majorca folk club

As I went out in the Plaza Majeor
Walking out the plaza one day

I saw a young fellow - a wearing sunglasses
And unto me the young fellow did say

I see by your camera, you are a tourist
Oh I have a camera and sunglasses too
But I've got diarrhoea
And I caught it here
So you better stand back
Or get covered in poo


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: GUEST,Larry K
Date: 19 May 04 - 09:21 AM

Jeff Rantzer did a cute short parody of "Moonshadow" which went "I'm being followed by a state trooper, state trooper state trooper"

A lot of Streets of Lardeo parodies.   I wrote this one about the donut competition in Canada between Tim Horton and Robins Donuts.   In London Ontario just south of Victoria Park there was a Robins Donuts on Horton street. I thought- why would they do that so I wrote the parody.   Sing Out promised to publish it but never did.   I noticed recently that the Robins Donuts is out of Business on Horton street, but that a new Tim Hortons has been build.

As I walked out the streets of London
As I walked out on London one day
I spied a Tim Hortons and the Street it said Robin
The street it said Robin as clear as the day

Now I like Tim Hortons if that is important
But give me the Robin's for their donuts are the best
Take me to a near Robin's and don't just start sobbin
Its over on Horton Street just to your west

I see from your laughter you think its quite funny
These words I did say as I ckearkt walked by
Tim Hortons on Robins and Robins on Horton
I was dazed and confused and I donut know why

The dairy queen's sweet, it's over on King Street
I just stop why when I am downtown
And over on Queen street a Burger King outlet
Where night clubs and pawn shots and drag queens abound

Go write a letter to the London coucil
And try to explain any logic in this
Route 401 due east I am heading
For a town south of Guelph by the name of Paris


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: Mark Cohen
Date: 19 May 04 - 05:52 AM

I like Joybell's, and you might even be able to improve it by leaving off the last phrase:

"Try to remember..." followed by a puzzled, vacant look, gazing upwards, hand cupping chin...


Aloha,
Mark

PS The real trick is to do it while keeping a straight face!


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: GUEST,Sylvia
Date: 19 May 04 - 04:25 AM

I heard a lovely couple of lines to the tune of Give me Sunshine (of Morcambe and Wise fame): "Give me heartburn, give me piles, give me tapeworms, miles and miles...". Does anyone know the rest (if there is any more, that is)?


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: Forsh
Date: 25 Mar 04 - 03:56 PM

Ah, thats better, re-set the old cookie and I aint a guest no more!
ANOTHER...
Bend over lay down and let me in.. (Status Quo)
Spread your lovely legs & lay my way... (I know, sexist..)
AND... I gues there will be a full version of this one somewhere..
(Magic Moments)
Remember the night, you fell in the shite, you had your best suit on,
the one with the stripes, the one that you bought with embasy coupons,*
Magic, moments, ...
*Embasy ciggies had gift coupons back in the day when Fas were cool & good for you!


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: GUEST,Forsh
Date: 25 Mar 04 - 03:49 PM

With easter comming up, how about this wee ditty...
As sang by me and my old army mates, of 10 field squadron back in 1975
There is a green hill far away,
without a city wall,
where the dear lord was crucified,
he died to save us all....
....................... 1, 2, 3,
FOR he's a jolly good fellow, for he's a jolly good...
I'll get me coat as well, then?


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: weerover
Date: 25 Mar 04 - 11:57 AM

"Haemoglobin, oh my darling, when the lights are soft and low..."

Don't quite know why that comes to mind when reading all of the above.

wr.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: Schantieman
Date: 25 Mar 04 - 10:55 AM

Last night at the Everyman, Hughie Jones said,

"I'll do the Ellen Vannin. That always goes down well!"

S


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: GUEST,Buddy Horny
Date: 25 Mar 04 - 10:36 AM

All of my life, I've been kissin,
Your left tit cos the right one's missin,
Oh boy


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: GUEST
Date: 25 Mar 04 - 08:41 AM

Oh Ellan Vannin, lost in the Ship Canal...

The first good joy that Mary had,
It was "The Joy of Sex"...

Her eyes they shone like diamonds,
She walked like the queen of the land,
And her knickers they hung round her ankles,
She'd snapped her elastic band.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: Dead Horse
Date: 24 Mar 04 - 11:36 AM

Songs Of War
If you want to find the sergeant
I know where he is, I know where he is, I know where he is.
If you want to find the sergeant, I know where he is.
Posted!

With yer guns and drums and drums and guns, haroo, haroo
With yer guns and drums and drums and guns, haroo, haroo
With yer guns and drums and drums and guns the enemy nearly slew yer.
My darling dear, you look so queer. Oh! Sorry, my mistake.......

When I was a young man, I carried my pack
Which is how come I got flat feet......

Oh Mrs McGrath, the sergeant said.
Would you like to make a soldier out of your son, Ted?
NO!

The Royal Oak or 23rd February (you've got to know this one:-)
On the 23rd of February, the weather was very foggy........


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: Dead Horse
Date: 24 Mar 04 - 11:05 AM

Temperance Songs
Bring us a teapot and set it up right
Bring us a tea pot to last out the night
Bring us a tea pot, no matter how hot
We'll drink it all up, boys, we'll drink the lot.

Come all you bold heroes, give an ear to my song
I'll sing in the praise of hot tea and a bun
There's a nice little tea shoppe, over England doth roll
Bring me the milk ladle, and the sugar bowl.

Oh, herb tea, thou art my darling
You keep me regular, both night and morning.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Mar 04 - 09:38 AM

As I walked out in the streets of Laredo,
As I walked out in Laredo one day
A f*****g big bus came up and ran o'er me,
And flat was the fate of a squirrel such as I.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: dick greenhaus
Date: 23 Mar 04 - 08:24 PM

DigiTrad does have an entry called "Quickies"--to which these will be appended.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: JennyO
Date: 23 Mar 04 - 08:18 PM

A version of Laredo by, I believe, the Smothers Brothers:


As I walked out in the streets of Laredo,
As I walked out in Laredo one day.
I spied a young cowboy dressed in white linen.
Dressed in white linen and cold as the clay.

I see by your outfit that you are a cowboy,
You see by my outfit I am a cowboy, too,
We see by our outfits that we are both cowboys,
And if you get an outfit you can be a cowboy too!


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Short Songs/Parodies
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Mar 04 - 06:57 PM

When John Henry was a little baby,
Sittin' on his daddy's knee,
His daddy picked him, threw him on the floor
Said, "This baby's done wet on me, Lord Lord...."

Down in the West Texas town of El Paso
I ate some tortillas that made me get up and hurl.

Diaaaaaaaaaaarrhea when the wind comes whippin' down the plains
And it's sure is sweet
To make the seat
Before it fills up your new jeans....

As I walked down in the streets of Laredo
As I walked down in Laredo one day
I slipped in some dog poop and stained my white linen
And to clean it the laundry charged more than my pay.


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