Lyr Add: A Tow For Nowt

Subject: Lyr Add: A Tow For Nowt
From: *#1 PEASANT*
Date: 23 Jun 04 - 10:38 AM

A Tow for Nowt.

Oh, wor cargo we'd got oot, away doon at Whitehill Spoot;
But the wind an' tide wis both on them contrairy, O!
An' it seemed we'd hae te lie till the tide wis comin' high,
So the keel we moored, an' leuked aboot se warry, O.

Chorus.

So the keel we moored, etc.

Just then, te wor delight, a tugboat hove I' sight,
An' backed astarn close by where we wor stannin', O.
Ses aa, noo aa'l accost hor! so aa hailed, "Hey, Mister Forster,
Wad ye gie's a ow as far up as wo'r gannin', O?"

Then the tugboat maistor torned, an' he leuked, an' kinda gorned,
Sees he, "Hoo dis thoo knaa they caal me Forster, O?"
"Man," ses aa, "yor dad afore wis a chep aa did adore,
An' yo'r just like him, maa canny Mistor Forster, O,"

Iv a frindly kind o' way, aa got a tow that day;
An' off we set, wi' nowt at aal te cost hor, O.
Aa bargaint wivoot doot, as na past wor towlin' oot,
"At the Mushroom hoy hor off, please Mistor Forster, O."

So we cam' up spankin' fine, an' past aal on the Tyne-
Sic a tow for nowt aa waddent then he lost hor, O.
An' we just hed past the Geuse, an' aa thowt o' getting' lowse;
So, ses aa, "Just hoy hor off, please Mistor Forster, O."

Wi' the tiller 'tween his legs, just like twee wooden pegs,
He nivvor torned, but oney went the faster, O.
Aa shoots oot, "Here we are, yor gannin' ower far;
Aa telt ye 'twas the Mushroom, Mistor Forster, O!"

What wis deein noo wis clear, so aa couldn't help but sweer.
"Yo'r a bad 'un, yo'r as bad as any coster, O!
An' so wis yor aad dad-gosh, he was just as bad!
Where the smash, man, are ye towin's te, ye Forster, O?"

But it aal wis o' nee use, owther sweerin' or abouse;
For a joke there Forster steud as deef as dummy, O;
An' he waddent hoy us free till past Newcastle Quay,
So, thinks aa, a tow for nowt is sometimes rummy, O!

-Richard Oliver Heslop, "Newcastle Weekly Chronicle," 1882.