BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!

Subject: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 17 Aug 04 - 05:16 PM

O.K so go for it!!!...write something which shows your literary prowess or your imagination and not just the one liners that you submit to the Mudcat threads. Show us what you are made of without criticism of others or negative reactions to others!!!!! Go for it!!!!!........CAN YOU??????

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Aug 04 - 05:17 PM

Yes, I can.

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 17 Aug 04 - 05:22 PM

So do it then!!

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Gern
Date: 17 Aug 04 - 05:27 PM

Uncertain of the task before him, humbled by the challenge but undaunted nonetheless, he took careful aim and commanded his shaking hand to cease. But the image before him broke his concentration. The very face of innocence stood before him, with a trusting look that could only be based on the expectation of mercy. He thought briefly of duty, of decency and of a moment that might forever define his life, and longed for the focus that comes from a narrowness of vision. Instead, he saw it all too clearly...

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 17 Aug 04 - 05:30 PM

Nice one Gern!!! Good start, Best wishes.

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Once Famous
Date: 17 Aug 04 - 05:32 PM

What a complete waste of time and energy. I would rather make a clever voice mail announcement.

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 17 Aug 04 - 05:35 PM

Good for you Martin...You always opt out of challenges as I see it. If it is too much for you then stick to expletives and putting others down...That's your bag I believe. Best wishes.

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: SINSULL
Date: 17 Aug 04 - 05:44 PM

iT WAS A DARK AND STORMY NIGHT. pRISCILLA TUCKED HER HAIRPIECE INTO THE BOX ON HER DRESSER AND CAREFULLY UNDID HER BODICE WHEN A FLASH OF LIGHTENING AND A CRASH OF THUNDER ...AW CRAP. cAPSLOCK AGAIN!

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 17 Aug 04 - 05:54 PM

Remarks are generally perceived as more clever or literary if they are within a context of some sort. This wide-open audition is way too contrived to be meaningful. If you want to read something I've written in a literary scholarship context (most of you can save your time and not follow this link because it makes a lot more sense if you've read the book) you'll find an essay about The Sharpest Sight posted here. It is a particularly good novel by an American Indian writer; this is the field in which I was working when I wrote my master's thesis. As most authors of just about anything will attest, I would make some revisions if I had the opportunity. But it works.

SRS

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 17 Aug 04 - 06:02 PM

Stilly River Sage...I have to say I am impressed and yes it does work...Reading it was something of a marathon but worth it. Best wishes...

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 17 Aug 04 - 06:07 PM

You read it that fast? It's a 20-some page essay and I only just posted it. Are you an Evelyn Wood graduate?

SRS

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 17 Aug 04 - 06:10 PM

I am just a U.K speed reader and write for Glossy mags....Keep it up friend..you have promise. Best wishes.

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Once Famous
Date: 17 Aug 04 - 06:12 PM

Georginasilver crept down the stairs, fists clenched tight, sweat beading on his brow. A shortness of breath caused even more panic. He took two feeble attempts at a sprint.

Too late!

He dumped in his pants!

There, asshole, satisfied?

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 17 Aug 04 - 06:13 PM

Not good enough to merit an award for literature Martin...You would have to do much better than that...Try again!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 17 Aug 04 - 06:15 PM

When one thinks excrement...one wonders where the brain is actually situated???

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 17 Aug 04 - 06:34 PM

Satisfaction is something which I get from seeing someone who seems to dump on everyone else getting into such a state that he cannot compose even the most elementary literary work to prove his worth. However I am apt to feel more sorry for you than to shun you and hope that your real self is not the piteous creature that presents itself here Martin. Expletives and vague criticisms are apparently all you are capable of so just get on with it and enjoy yourself in your own little world. By the way...who is Georginasilver? sounds female to me.
Best wishes.

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: CarolC
Date: 17 Aug 04 - 06:35 PM

I thought this thread was a very interesting literary challenge:

BS: Mudcat challenge: 100 word story exactly

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Peter K (Fionn)
Date: 17 Aug 04 - 06:49 PM

Georgiansilver, excrement and its disposal was one of the significant themes of Gulliver's Travels (specifically his travels in Lilliput, obviously). Does your excrement-brains theory embrace Swift?

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 17 Aug 04 - 07:11 PM

ROFLOL

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Don Firth
Date: 17 Aug 04 - 07:54 PM

A brief excerpt from my magnum opus, from a chapter entitle "People, Places, and Critters" in which I describe some of the more interesting people, locations, and a couple of pets who were associated with the Seattle folk music scene back when I first became involved in the early Fifties. For example, in addition to singing,

        Bob Clark brewed his own beer. It had gained much currency at hoots and songfests, possibly because he usually brought substantial quantities of it in quart bottles, and it was free. People raved about how great it tasted, but to be honest I can't say that I was very fond of it. I thought the flavor was just passable. It struck me as very yeasty.
        Someone who knew something about brewing beer told me that he didn't like it much, either. He said that Bob's beer was still green when he bottled it. He should have left it in the crock and let it "work" longer.
        This gave it two outstanding characteristics. For a number of people, including me, one characteristic in particular--its aftereffect--was a major drawback.
        Now, some people escaped this, but many others did not, and I was among the latter. If you drank very much of the stuff--but still not enough to get a buzz on--you would wake up the following morning with The Mother of All Hangovers. It was a real throbbing, gut-wrenching, nuclear powered, hundred-megaton head-banger. Victims of a religious bent would be convinced that they were finally being visited by the retribution of an angry, Old Testament God. Those who were medically oriented would be certain that the level of agony they were suffering had to be symptomatic of severe brain damage. It was the kind of hangover where every pulse-beat felt as if a hammer were being vigorously applied to the base of your skull. At first, you would be afraid you were going to die; after awhile, you would be afraid you were not going to die. Some drank substantial quantities of it with no apparent problem, but those who were susceptible to this particular aftereffect would drink a thimbleful for the sake of conviviality, then move on to the store-bought stuff.
        And the second characteristic:   the instant you popped the cap, the contents erupted in a foamy geyser that surged to an impressive altitude. It then returned to earth in a mighty deluge, drenched the carpet and many of the assembled celebrants, and filled the room with odor of hops and yeast.
        It was quite a ceremony when Bob opened a bottle. He would usually set the bottle into a dishpan or washtub, apply a bottle opener to the cap, then cover his hand and the bottle with a large towel. Apprehensively, he would begin to manipulate the bottle opener until the cap was ready to go ballistic. As he made these preparations, the assembled company would gather in a circle, then carefully back up several paces to a safe distance.
        It was like watching somebody blast a stump.

Don Firth

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 17 Aug 04 - 08:10 PM

Very funny, Don! Thanks!

SRS

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Amos
Date: 17 Aug 04 - 08:47 PM

LOL, Don!


A

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Once Famous
Date: 17 Aug 04 - 09:59 PM

I thought it SUCKED, Don. Absolute crap. Better writing is probably found in a supermarket tabloid.

Georgiansilver, you were so flabbergasted by what I wrote, it took you three consecutive posts just to compose yourself. Ha Ha.

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: mack/misophist
Date: 18 Aug 04 - 12:42 AM

Long live the gelding knife!

What more can be said?

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 18 Aug 04 - 03:19 AM

You are so right Martin G...my gast has never been so flabbered at such a pitiful rendering... Brilliant work once again Don. Thanks
Best wishes.

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 18 Aug 04 - 07:08 AM

Don't read this if you get LSD flashbacks...

Toby Day Afternoon, or Babel in a Miner Quay

You're excused Martin, I don't want you to strain what passes for a brain...

Robin

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 18 Aug 04 - 07:22 AM

BTW,
A very Australian Sense of Humour in that piece, Don...

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: GUEST,noddy
Date: 18 Aug 04 - 07:45 AM

Once upon a time there was a British Olympic gold medallist.

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 18 Aug 04 - 12:12 PM

Once upon a time there was a cartoon character called Noddy.

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Don Firth
Date: 18 Aug 04 - 12:30 PM

Knowledgeable literary criticism is always welcome, Marty, but if it's true that ignorance is bliss, I must congratulate you on having attained Nirvana.

Don Firth

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 18 Aug 04 - 12:40 PM

Touché!

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: GUEST
Date: 29 Aug 04 - 10:00 PM

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: katlaughing
Date: 30 Aug 04 - 02:36 AM

Some of us have had a few stories included in Aine's Mudcat Storytellers' site which one may also find by going to the Quick Links and clicking on "Aine's Mudcat songbook."

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: GUEST
Date: 30 Aug 04 - 07:49 AM

Georgina Silver felt aggrieved that a "Gibbon" could be so scathing in attitude as she had always heard that monkeys were friendly and amenable. Martin the gibbon had insulted her in his usual expletive way, by suggesting the HE not she had "dumped in his pants" (see post further up)and had said "There asshole, satisfied"?(see same post) although being called a hole in a donkey is not as bad as being called an "arsehole".
Had the Gibbon been a clever human rather than the monkey he was, he might have answered the various literary challenges that both Georgina Silver and Don Firth has placed before him. The Gibbon knew that at some point he would have to answer in this way or he would be deficient of credibilty among the other animals. The "Cats" or Catters as they were known had seen too much nastiness, too much flaming and too much trolling and were now expecting something more from the "Gibbon". They were all waiting with major anticipation for the Gibbon to blossom.

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Once Famous
Date: 30 Aug 04 - 12:24 PM

Sorry douche bag. You need to focus on your genitalia for your cheap thrills.

Writing good literature here has no redeeming value.

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: wysiwyg
Date: 30 Aug 04 - 12:27 PM

Writing good literature here has no redeeming value.

I dunno, I had a really great idea (I think) for a series of short stories, but I would need a British writing partner for them, so Mudcat could be an interesting place to do that interactively.

~Susan

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: katlaughing
Date: 30 Aug 04 - 12:43 PM

Writing good literature here has no redeeming value.

It used to before it was overrun by asses. Just ask PeterT, Spaw, LonesomeEJ, JenEllen, and a few others who used to write here.

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 30 Aug 04 - 01:18 PM

Good literature....No redeeming value here? mmmm.
I have personally enjoyed some superb fictional writings from Don Firth and have much admiration for the man as well as a good few others. As for Georgina Silver I'm not so sure. But I enjoy putting pen to paper, typing out pieces of poetry or prose, composing short stories but most of all writing joke poetry...well almost most of all...I suppose my writing of Folk Songs is paramount at the moment.
Martin....ignoring the pressure challenge above by GUEST (as usual)
I would appreciate knowing where your artistic talent lies and if you are in fact capable of churning out a piece of literature of some sort which is acceptable to all. Indubitably I will only get abuse from you for this but perhaps you should consider your own credibilty and produce a literary gem.
Best wishes.

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Once Famous
Date: 30 Aug 04 - 03:03 PM

Let me tell ya, pal, that it should be no surpirse to you that with my vivid imagination and way with words, I could EASILY write short stories here or anywhere else.

In college, I took short story and creative writing classes virtually every semester because it was so easy.

You just don't get it. I just don't want to do that here. It has nothing to do with can't doing it, I just have no need to express myself this way here, or worse yet, have a good idea stolen.

If you need to know so much about my artistic talents, realize that I play guitar, banjo, and bass very proficiently for 40 years. I have quite a fine singing voice, and currently playing quite regularly as a soloist at a club, and play in many group situations in a very large and thriving bluegrass community. I am a country music historian and am very well read and knowledgable about the genre.

Because I choose not to write a paragraph or two of impromptu fiction to satisfy my own ego is really something I find amazing that someone can harp on.

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: GUEST,Isaac Azimuth
Date: 30 Aug 04 - 04:30 PM

"Have a good idea stolen." That's the kind of comment you hear from someone who is not a writer. No real writer ever worries about having an idea "stolen." Ideas are everywhere. The dumbest thing someone can ask a real writer is "where do you get your ideas?' Harlan Ellison always answers, "I subscribe to an idea service in Schenectady." Real writers have a dozen ideas a day. Give ten different writers the same idea, and they will each develop it in their own unique way. The idea is only the beginning. What matters is knowing a good idea when you have it, knowing what to do with it, and then doing it.

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Once Famous
Date: 30 Aug 04 - 04:33 PM

Thanks. I'll use that idea in my next article I write for the New Yorker.

Sorry, no credit or money for you.

Real writers are getting ripped off left and right. You are way to naieve if you don't believe that.

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: BaldEagle2
Date: 30 Aug 04 - 04:46 PM

I wish you a long, long life Martin, for I vouchsafe it will be more than a hundred years before you get your next article published by anyone.    (Including, I fancy, your own home computer - which would surely do a very human thing and blow all its fuses before printing the second page).

And the same is no doubt true of you getting your first article published, as well.

But, on a happier note, you will never get ripped off left and right.   Not you.

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: wysiwyg
Date: 30 Aug 04 - 05:15 PM

Feeding trolls seldom amounts to a fine literary effort.

~S~

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Once Famous
Date: 30 Aug 04 - 05:30 PM

It's already happened Baldy Eagle. I've been published twice already.

If only you had a clue, but you do not.

Like I said, why am I obligated to publish anything here, of all places. what purpose does it serve? go buy a fucking magazine and support some real writers.

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Peg
Date: 30 Aug 04 - 05:48 PM

okay, everyone go check out the Poetry Corner thread and leave this one to die!

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Once Famous
Date: 30 Aug 04 - 05:50 PM

Yes, let's all go to Poetry corner.

wait for me, I have to put my shoes on.

see ya there!

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: GUEST,SigmaEpiphone
Date: 30 Aug 04 - 09:09 PM

OK FOLKS, FIRST WE HAVE:

Subject: RE: Michael Peter Smith from Chicago.
From:Martin Gibson
Date: 24 Sep 03 - 03:38 PM

"As I am generally bored with boy and his guitar acts..."

THEN LATER WE FIND OUT THAT:

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Martin Gibson
Date: 30 Aug 04 - 03:03 PM

"I have quite a fine singing voice, and currently playing quite regularly as a soloist at a club..."

Quite a flip-flop-
It's patently obvious that Martin Gibson isn't realy GeorgianSilver after all,
he's really John Kerry.

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Once Famous
Date: 30 Aug 04 - 09:23 PM

Guest,cheapshitguitar,

Man, have you got too much time on your hands.

Actually, I'm bored with boy and his guitar acts, especially navel gazing boy and their guitar acts.

But not man and his guitar acts.
Especially when the pay is so good.

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Teresa
Date: 30 Aug 04 - 09:57 PM

Isaac Azimuth? Heeheeheehee, I love it. And never heard about that quote from harlan; sounds like something he'd say ...
T

Subject: RE: BS: Literary challenge..go for it!!
From: Once Famous
Date: 30 Aug 04 - 10:00 PM

Are you Mother Teresa?