BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: GUEST,To Crane Driver
Date: 27 Nov 04 - 06:45 PM

Just so you know,
For 2 weeks now I have been trying my hand at poetry again only to come up empty handed so..........your Santee gift should arrive around the middle of Dec. Keep the snow shovel and the box empty so I can make a quick stop and then on to the next.   More later, SS

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: GUEST,A Curmudgeonly Santa's Assistant
Date: 27 Nov 04 - 03:40 PM

Well, then. Obviously the Boss has decided that he can't trust we elves to do the job of finding pressies so he's doing it himself (Or should that be herself, seeing as he's in drag to be incognito!). I don't know why!

Anyway, we're keeping an eye on you, making sure you ARE being good, even though you claim you are, but we know the truth. We've got permission to publish his opinion of you on this thread, and here we go!

Nice, with a few naughty marks. Neatness needs improvement. Behavior has been good sometimes, not so good other times. Manners could still use some attention. Was very nice last Monday.

Well done!

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 27 Nov 04 - 08:19 AM

BGs SSS has a recognisable turn of phrase methinks!
Giok

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: GUEST,BG'd SSS cont'd
Date: 27 Nov 04 - 07:26 AM

To be a bat, or not to be: that is the question:
Whether 'tis nobler in the fig tree to hang
and while away the dark and stormy days
Or to take wings against a sea of figs,
And by eating end them? To burp: to sleep;
No more; and by a burp to say we end
The hunger and the thousand little figs
That flesh is heir to, 'tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wish'd. To eat, to sleep;
To eat: perchance with cream: ay, there's the rub;
For in that taste of sweet what dreams may come
When we have hung forever on this hanging branch,
Must give us pause: thats to digest
and then to eat another fig,
and rest
- Soft you now!
The fair Bat Goddess! Nymph, in thy orisons
Be all my squeaks remember'd...

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: GUEST,Bat Goddess's Sneaky Surreptitious Santa (SS
Date: 27 Nov 04 - 07:19 AM

its a long way from the land of the humble to the abode of the Bat Goddess.

so the queenly owl doth glide, her silken bundle of gifts in beak, to sail the mighty sky and to soar the highest peak.

and the little elves, do they have furry wings, and squeak like bats and other little things?

benzaiten, goddess of music

who is the bat? why is this creature so beautiful?

and bat goddess, for all i had a quid, so far i havent found a rubber squid.

to bat or not to bat? that is the question...

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: Alaska Mike
Date: 27 Nov 04 - 06:15 AM

Why did the chicken cross the road in Texas???














To prove to the armadillo that it could be done.

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: GUEST,JennBrooks Own Personal Armadillo Wrangler a
Date: 27 Nov 04 - 02:51 AM

Hohoho, JennBrooks! How nice to hear from you. Old Santa has recovered from the election and has been scouring the planet for something suitable for you...as it looks like the whole armadillo thing is going to fall through. Don't you worry, though, Santa has your best interests at heart--my newly formed armadillo relationships lead me to believe that it's possible one could have TOO many. I will say, however, that I have become quite fond of these little critters. I'm not saying they are smart...but then, smart isn't everything!

My gift wrapping elves are a bit behind, but I think it is safe to say that your present is close to being on its way. All in all, the search for a just the right petit gateau for you has been a thoroughly pleasurable experience, well, almost thoroughly. There was one armadillo that had a real mouth on him...

I'm on my way now to go hang out with my favorite reindeer. It's Vixen, though I'm careful to not let the others know. Take care of yourself, don't get tired shopping, and remember to be verrrrry good, or Santa will be tempted to keep your present for himself!

Your humble servant, Santa.

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: GUEST,Open Mike's Sleepy Secret Santa
Date: 26 Nov 04 - 11:08 PM

Yawn, Laurel, you must have patience. Christmas will come along in its own sweet time and I'm sure you will enjoy your pressie. I've already picked it out, but haven't sent it yet. I hope you can wait until Christmas Day to open it, this inability of yours to withstand suspense is a bit worrying. But I know you can do it. So I will probably send it early, we'll see. I hope you had a nice Thanksgiving Holiday. Bye for now, I must get to bed and rest up for the big push.

Santa

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: open mike
Date: 26 Nov 04 - 07:56 PM

less than a month to go now
i do not know if i can stand the suspense!

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: Joybell
Date: 26 Nov 04 - 05:24 PM

Hooray! I've got it! My Dearownsecret Santa. You're on CHRISTMAS ISLAND aren't you? It's got LOTS of Pacific coastline. That's all it's got. Of course you meant feet not miles because Christmas Island is teeny. You were just trying to fool me. You live 40 feet from the Pacific coast on Christmas Island!! I'm so lucky. I'll bet I'm the only one with a Santa on Christmas Island!! Cheery-bye and love Joy

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: GUEST,mmario's ssecretive ssecret ssanta
Date: 26 Nov 04 - 12:27 AM

the Research Elf finally got back with a few booklets (is THAT all??, you've been gone AGES!! what were you doing? reading very book in the place?) so more pressies are being gathered to make a decent sized parcel & they will be packed & sent one day sometime soon.

But they will arrive before christmas, even if a certain Research Elf has to carry them all the way.

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: jennbrooks
Date: 25 Nov 04 - 10:59 PM

Hey, Armadillo Wrangler--I've been remiss and haven't written for awhile. Awhile before that, you weren't feeling great. I hope you're fine! I hope you haven't run athwart of a recalcitrant armadillo, or anything. And that is not just because I'm concerned for my present!

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull
Date: 25 Nov 04 - 06:26 PM

post number 500!
Wahay!!!!!

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: Joybell
Date: 25 Nov 04 - 06:23 PM

Dear Master Elf Liz, Would it be possible to start a Part 2 thread here? I'm peddling as fast as I can! Love and thanks for everything Joy

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: Joybell
Date: 25 Nov 04 - 06:18 PM

Wow! Out with the young atlas. Forget the maps of Atlantis then? The ones with "There be Mermaids" stamped on them. It's MILES is it my Dear SS. Run a line down the Pacific coast 40 miles in on the country that still uses MILES. Just a minute. Hard to balance the atlas and the keyboard. Have to come back. Great to hear from you Myowndear Santa. Cheery-bye and Love back, Joy

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: jaze
Date: 25 Nov 04 - 01:29 PM

Well, my santa has a very warped sense of humor! Now who do I know around here with a warped sense of humor.....? Any clues, Santa?

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: Bat Goddess
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 03:26 PM

Hmmm . . . my SS hit with with a pome (stet) right off the bat (no pun intended) but I haven't heard hide nor hair of him/her since.

Probably too busy accumulating all manners of goodies.

Linn

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: GUEST,Moonglows fairly Secretive Santa
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 03:25 PM

Be Alert(Texas needs lerts)in about a week or 10 days as a diverted Sleigh may be in the vicinty of Ft Worth and may have on board a..... welll fill in the blanks yourself
"Blah blah Ms Moonglow, sign here please.... Blah blah. box containing...Blah and more blah and 2 pairs of Blah(used) anda small anount of blah and blah, sufficient for a season of ..Goodwill..
and a pot of.....BLAH!!!! and a copy of the ... Blah ness of blah??" greetings and stuff from your Secretive Elfish Santa

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: el_punkoid_nouveau
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 03:22 PM

Boohoo!!!!!!!! I think my Santa has forgotten me (or have I just been terribly, terribly naughty?)

Nairy so much as a clue as to an identity...

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: Tig
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 01:59 PM

But Santa - I WAS reading the freds and I had Firecat checking for me whilst I was away.

I'm really getting excited, 'specially if you are no saint!!!!

Lots of love and hugs
Tig xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: GUEST,Elf Supervisor for Joybell
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 11:21 AM

Old Atlas?    One would not want to make too much fun of my advancing years, would one?    (Young Atlas sounds more appropriate, don't you think?   (And they called him Atlas because he never wore an 'at).

Anyway, I used to live within 40 miles of the Atlantic and I now I live within 40 miles of the Pacific.   That should be a dead give away.

luv SS xx

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: GUEST,my guru always said
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 07:59 AM

Brill, got another postard from my Wonderful SS, Thanks!!!
But it's from yet another place *sob*
I think I'll enlist Hercule Poirot to track you down you confusing Santa. Keep up the red herrings!

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From:
Date: 23 Nov 04 - 07:51 PM

coal? I hope the weight is not too much for the rainforest reindeer.

can I get a picture of the rainforest reindeer as I have a small but growing collection of reindeer chrissy ornaments?

sandra (who does not live in Newcastle)

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: GUEST,Micca's Secret Faerie Gift Giver
Date: 23 Nov 04 - 06:10 PM

I'm so glad the new cyber system is working. It's a new service to help keep you in wonder til the gift actually arrives. My elves said you weren't always very good at answering email.... But I'm glad you answered promptly. I knew you must be good at heart.

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: Micca
Date: 23 Nov 04 - 04:38 PM

My SS just sent me a personal and private greeting card!!! WOW, Many thanks secret Faerie person,

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: GUEST,SS on discovering Jaze is not a Penguin
Date: 23 Nov 04 - 12:07 PM

Aha.... so chocolate sardines might be offensive...hence I deduce you cannot be a penguin.

So...not a nun,...not a penguin..what else is black and white???? What does a santa buy for the Newspaper that has everything????

..ahhh maybe you are a magpie

???????????

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: GUEST,MBS Lynne's Secret Santa
Date: 23 Nov 04 - 09:26 AM

You pressie is on the way!

If you get a knock at the door from an elephant with an elf costume, don't worry, we're breaking in some new talent.

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: Leadfingers
Date: 23 Nov 04 - 08:21 AM

So its on the way is it ?? I will endeavour to control my impatience !

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: GUEST,Tig's Cloaked Claus...
Date: 22 Nov 04 - 05:42 PM

I have not seen a message from you, this year, m'dear. So I am not sure if you are bothering to read these threads. If you are, however, I will tell you this:

I am no where near a saint, so I will not take the title of "Santa."

And even though you have not left me any clues this year, I know, by the power of all things Clausian, what you want for Yule. I have also sent word to my elves to begin flying your pressie to you A.S.A.P.. They inform me, on their honor, that it will arive in time.

And if you can't take an elve's word of honor, you have not an ounce of trust in you.

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 22 Nov 04 - 12:03 PM

Poor Alvin!
Giok

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: GUEST,Bet's Santa
Date: 22 Nov 04 - 12:02 PM

Dont worry Bet , I have discounted MOST of the stories I have heard aboot you this year so the elves are on their way with a bijou packetette .Hope the Post Elves do their part properly !

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: Cllr
Date: 22 Nov 04 - 11:49 AM

I should have said I nicked that from a webpage before anyone praises/damns me for it.

Cllr

"chipmunks roasting over an open fire"

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: Cllr
Date: 22 Nov 04 - 11:46 AM

I'm Not Your Santa Claus


sung to 'Steppin' Stone

by flamenka van tassels
I....I.....I.....I....I'm not your santa claus
I....I.....I.....I....I'm not your santa claus
You're tryin' to hire me for your mall display,
To sit up in that chair all night and day,
You think that I look just like the man,
Well just cuz i do, doesn't mean I am.
I tell ya,
I....I.....I.....I....I'm not your santa claus
I....I.....I.....I....I'm not your santa claus
not your santa claus, i'm not your santa claus
(ho, ho, hoho, ho, ho, hoho)
I....I.....I.....I....I'm not your santa claus
When you first saw me walk down your mall,
You saw the beard, the belly yes i have it all
I really think that you should listen
Cuz i have to tell you, I just got out of prison...
Tell ya...
I....I.....I.....I....I'm not your santa claus
I....I.....I.....I....I'm not your santa claus
not your santa claus, i'm not your santa claus
(ho, ho, hoho, ho, ho, hoho)

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: GUEST,Alaska Mike's Secret Santa
Date: 22 Nov 04 - 10:05 AM

Mike, one of the elves told me about the rain on your trip and that you might need sunglasses, suntan lotion and a Hawaiian shirt for gag gifts. As far as the naughty list, let's just say you're still being evaluated. All that time with MMario and Big Mick had me concerned, but it seems you behaved once you were away from them. Keep up the good work and keep singing!

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: Alaska Mike
Date: 22 Nov 04 - 09:28 AM

Thanks for keeping such good track of me Santa, you old scamp. No, sunglasses were NOT needed where I was at in the Aleutian Islands. We had lots of rain blowing sideways and snow blowing sideways, but didn't have much sun blowing sideways. Its good to be back. My next trip is December 6th down to Seattle. I'm hoping to have a chance to share a song or two with Deckman and Miken and others while there.

By the way, you never told me if I had made the naughty list again this year. Take care of yourself, Santa. I know you've got a lot to do in the next month or so. Watch out for your back, and don't hurt yourself with any of them cutting tools.

Best wishes to you,
Mike

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: GUEST,Alaska Mike's Secret Santa
Date: 22 Nov 04 - 07:00 AM

Glad to see you back from your trip, Mike. Did you need sunglasses?

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: Mary in Kentucky
Date: 21 Nov 04 - 10:00 PM

Wow Santa, you're really working overtime, sending the package so early and all. As it turns out, I have good postal connections to just about anywhere in the world (except Oz for some reason). I'll look for a surprise in the post next week - if you're who I think you are! (Actually, with the weather we've had the last three days I wish I'd put in an order for some sunshine.)

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: jaze
Date: 21 Nov 04 - 09:41 PM

Chocolate sardines!? Did I offend you?

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: SINSULL
Date: 21 Nov 04 - 09:22 PM

My Santa is apparently travelling hither and yon checking on who's been naughty and nice, at least that's what the postmarks indicate. He/she has been shopping. I just can't wait.

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: GUEST,moonglows somewhat secretive Santa
Date: 21 Nov 04 - 08:19 PM

(Tune Winter Wonderland)
Moonglow, are you listening?
in the lane snow is glistening
a beautiful sight
we're happy tonight
wrapping up a parcel for you

In the post it will travel
the mystery will unravel
you'll see by the name
the end of the game
The i.d. of your Mystery santa claus

in the parcel we may put some candy
or maybe a strange CD
maybe something from a comedy
that we have seen on the TV

Later on , when we're happy
we can sing something sappy
a Philosophers song?
as we roll along
looking on the bright side of Yule?
Your secretive Santa

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: GUEST,CLLR's Secretive Santa-type person
Date: 21 Nov 04 - 07:18 PM

'Twas a month before Christmas,
Or nearly, at least,
When Santa had gathered
Enough for a feast
A feast for the eyes,
And the ears, and the nose~
Maybe even the mouth-
Cllr has one of those!
So now Santa's reindeer
Are packing the sleigh
And the goodies will fly
Off to Cllr- not today,
But sometime this week,
Off to Cllr they will go,
No matter the wind or the rain
Or the snow!

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: GUEST,Mary in Kentucky's Secret Santa
Date: 21 Nov 04 - 07:02 PM

Dear Mary,

Your parcel is on its way. I sent Delvene The Elvene with a beautifully wrapped parcel to the mail room and she returned quite a long time later, looking very dishevelled with a silly smirk on her face and your present still in her hand. Silly girl.......she thought I said the MALE room! She had gone to visit Boris The Chief Elf in the workroom. So I accompanied her to the dispatch room and made sure she did her duty correctly. Hopefully the Polar Express Post is working well this year.

Best Regards
Santa

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: GUEST,The Terribly Secret Santa of Leadfingers
Date: 21 Nov 04 - 03:00 PM

Sir:

Your present was posted yesterday. Since it is coming from the third star to the left and stagger around blindly 'til morning, it will take some little time to get there. For your own sake please do not hold your breath until it comes, for if you do you will turn blue, faint, and if you don't start breathing again, you will most assuredly not be around when your present arrives.

It is e'en now winging its way to you o'er mountains and seas, across rocks and rills and rivers, passing through ports and portals, until one day -- perhaps even before you toss the Yule log upon the festive fire -- you will reverently hold it in your hands and ask "What the hell is this?" And when you have opened the package you will find the gift, neatly wrapped in cow, and you will exclaim, "YUCK! What the HELL is this?!"

Remember that your Secret Santa now has finger that are mere nubbins of bone, worn down to pay for your present, which, we understand, is something that you actually want.

Sincerely Yours,
(signed)
E. Edward Elvenfiend
Terribly Secret Santa Secretary

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: sian, west wales
Date: 21 Nov 04 - 02:05 PM

Good Lord! I'm speechless! I've Been Santa-ed!

I have the bestestest Santa in the hole whirled!

hugses and kisseses

siân

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: GUEST,Micca's Secretly Soaring Solstice Fairy
Date: 21 Nov 04 - 10:53 AM

Your gift has officially been handed over to the "higher?" powers and is winging it's way across the wide waters. Watch carefully for the signs and portents it may send on ahead. Be ready, be watchful, be wary-----

Your singing solstice fairy

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: GUEST,SS to the perfectly patient Tinker
Date: 21 Nov 04 - 06:50 AM

Well, the Elves have decided that this week is the right time for a complete shutdown, clean wipe & reinstallation of all our services at the North Pole, and who am I to contradict my Able Assistants who are experts in this field. The Elves are obviously determined to get this nasty chore over & done with in advance of the busy time ahead.

So don't you worry Dear Tinker if I'm unable to communicate for the next few days (or however long it takes), there is a backup service locally which can be accessed in need.

Please note that all spells will continue to be enforcable during this planned shut-down. Patience is definitely a Virtue.....

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: GUEST,Jaze's polewise secret santa
Date: 20 Nov 04 - 04:25 PM

From jaze's self portrait at the end of his last message it would appear that he IS in fact a PENGUIN....Ha ha you don't fool me!!!!!!!.....now where's that list...tin of chocolate sardines....

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: GUEST,Sian, West Wales' Secret Santa
Date: 20 Nov 04 - 02:47 PM

Your patience has been rewarded. With the aid of a kind postmistress a package left yesterday from---the United States. It should arrive within the next two weeks. My intent is to igve you a taste of...here. I will be glad to expound on the contents of the box, most likely after Christmas Day, probably the 27th. Cryptically, your SilentSectreSanta

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: GUEST,LF's SS Santa
Date: 19 Nov 04 - 08:44 PM

So, you think you've been abused? Well, you haven't experienced abuse until you've been in the United State Marine Corps! But come to think of it, I haven't been in any Marines, US or Royal or any. Now, when I was in the SBS, we...no wait I wasn't in either the SBS or the SAS. I was never allowed to have any fun.

Hidden within the posts are clues to my identity. And I will provide you with another: the posts are nothing at all like me. Not at all.

I'm frae the Highlands and tho' I canna play the pipes, I'd have na problem wi' a pipe o' ale, especially if you were paying.

Laddy, yer present will be on the way to ya tomorrow. I'd wanted to put more in it, but I an assured that you will appreciate it as it is.

And that All for now.

Subject: RE: BS: SECSY Silly Secret Santa/Santee Hints
From: Leadfingers
Date: 19 Nov 04 - 07:16 PM

It IS nice to know I have a Santa , but I am somewhat concerned at the level of abuse directed at my by same !! What I Done ??? But thanks in anticipation any way !!