BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!

Subject: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Oct 04 - 08:42 AM

Well, that's his own opinion, anyway.

I am an arrogant asshole.
Ebverybobby says that!

Tweed
K.O.T.R.O.T

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: Bobert
Date: 22 Oct 04 - 09:00 AM

Hey, Rap, why the poor ol' Twwezer? He ain't got nuthin' to be arrogant about...Really...

(^%)(&*&^$T%^%(*&...................................)

Shoot, Rap, that website ain't nuthin' more than ol' cardboard, a little chicken wire and lots of 200 mph duct tape.

Bobert

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Oct 04 - 09:03 AM

Bobert, I pulled that whole from the MOAB, where ol' Tweed hiz own self posted it just today (October 22, 2004). I'm just tryin' to help him get the word out, since he's too danged shy to do it all himself.

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Oct 04 - 09:32 AM

Here's the whole thing, Bobert.

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Tweed - PM
Date: 22 Oct 04 - 08:16 AM

I am an arrogant asshole.
Ebverybobby says that!

Tweed
K.O.T.R.O.T

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 22 Oct 04 - 10:15 AM

Maybe he should run for president... :-)

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: wysiwyg
Date: 22 Oct 04 - 11:27 AM

Well, I've stated on a number of occasions that I'm an a**hole, too, but apparently while I think I'm over-sufficiently arrogant, I'm not quite arrogant enough to have rated a thread about it! :~(

:~)

~Susan

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: CarolC
Date: 22 Oct 04 - 12:52 PM

Define 'Ebverybobby'.

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: Amos
Date: 22 Oct 04 - 03:44 PM

'Ebverybobby'. : Noun. A collective noun indicating alb bha beopble under cobsiberation.

A

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: CarolC
Date: 22 Oct 04 - 04:00 PM

It's not about English policemen then?

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: Tweed
Date: 23 Oct 04 - 09:20 AM

Thank you Rawpeerz, for getting my message out to themasses, and to my enemas and frends alike. Yaz, I am a argent asshole and I wuld like to invite az many obv the rest of you wif this inflexion to come ford and be clenzed. I feel better from making my confection to the Mudcat communety as a hole az I know that menny obv you harbvor simular analgesics tucked away deep inside somwher.
My plea to each and every one obv you is to throw up your windows an yell at the top obv yore vorses,

Yaz,I....

(inserde yore own name here)

am a arrgoant asshole!!

You will feel better fore it and the truth will be known to all and this world will be a better place.

Yores,
Tweed
A.A.& K.O.T.R.O.T.

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: CarolC
Date: 23 Oct 04 - 02:04 PM

Our windows don't go up. They only go side to side. How anti-climactic.

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Oct 04 - 09:24 PM

Some of mine don't open at all. Can I shout it from the rooftop or off the porch instead?

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: GUEST,Ms Penelope Rutledge
Date: 23 Oct 04 - 10:34 PM

Tweed's gross shortcomings as a human being and his wellnigh immeasurable arrogance are already so well known that I hardly think we need a vulgar thread about it. Tweed should just be ignored, like other unpleasant things that one cannot really do anything about.

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: Tweed
Date: 24 Oct 04 - 08:32 AM

Yaz my darling Penelope, but you could not ignore me could you? Admit it, you are irreversibly drawn to my arrogance and devil may care demeanor. Come to me my Sweet, I will take you places you have nebver been.

Tweed
A.A.& K.O.T.R.O.T.

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: GUEST,HC
Date: 24 Oct 04 - 09:18 AM

What caused all the furor in the first place? Does tweed hold strong opinions or something?

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: CarolC
Date: 24 Oct 04 - 12:57 PM

Strong is a good word. Strong and powerful like a ripe limberger cheese, that's our Tweed.

So, GUEST,HC, do your windows go up and down, or side to side?

Subject: Dealing with Gnats & Other Pests
From: GUEST,The Management
Date: 24 Oct 04 - 04:42 PM

This thread has been brought to our attention by several members. They have complained that it is a personal attack and is therefore unworthy to be posted on this forum.

We have taken these complaints seriously & have spent the last 9 days in sober conference to determine what actions, if any, we shall take.

This afternoon, we decided to publicize our progress.

We have determined the following:

1. This is definitely a personal attack.
2. The attack is directed upon one "Tweed".
3. Said "Tweed" was also the originator of the attack.
4. The said "Tweed" has, in several previous posts, exhibited multiple personalities.
5. The said "Tweed" has often signed his ravings with strange, undecipherable "signatures", such as ; "Tweed who is aslo knhardazz" and other such silliness.
6. The said "Tweed" is somewhat crazy.
7. The said "Tweed" arrogantly parades his craziness like a herd of prized ginnies, therefore, he is arrogant.

Therefore, we have determined that said "Tweed" is arrogant but, at this time, no determination has been made regarding his assholiness.

If we conclude that said "Tweed" is arrogant but not an asshole then the original precept is merely half true and we will have to delete half of this thread.

If we further conclude that said "Tweed" is aslo an asshole, then the original precept is completely true & therefore not a personal attack, but rather an observation of truth. Thread will then remain intact.

We welcome any evidence regarding said "Tweed's" assholiness, as it is imperative that we put this matter behind us so we can get on to the next crisis.

The Management

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: GUEST
Date: 24 Oct 04 - 05:43 PM

Hey, CarolC, my windows go up and down!   And shouting makes me happy ;~)).   btw, do you know what K.O.T.R.O.T. means?

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: GUEST,HC, my windows go up
Date: 24 Oct 04 - 05:44 PM

I meant to type my name last frame. Sorry. :D

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: CarolC
Date: 24 Oct 04 - 05:51 PM

Knights Of Tweed Royal Outhouse Tippers

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 24 Oct 04 - 06:57 PM

Har! Har! Boy, Tweed, you really know how to drive Penelope's mercury beyond the boiling point, don't you? Actually, she does seem to be drawn toward arrogant men, presumably because they appear to be a suitable foil for engaging in a duel, a veritable battle royale of will and tenacity. If Penelope ever marries I predict that it will be to a stupendously arrogant man and the two of them will make life absolute hell for one another...but it will at least never be dull.

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: GUEST
Date: 24 Oct 04 - 08:24 PM

Royal Outhouse Tippers...had to write that down to figure it out....Tweed is weird, I'll grant you that, but who isn't around here, eh????

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Oct 04 - 08:25 PM

The window in my living room didn't open so I used a brick. I then shouted The Phrase as loudly as I could.

I am now in jail for breaking and exiting.

Please send $2.57 US in bail money.

Thank you.

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: GUEST,HC again!
Date: 24 Oct 04 - 08:26 PM

There I go again forgetting to identify myself!!!   I tried to login but the system didn't send me my password the way it said that it did!!

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 24 Oct 04 - 09:21 PM

You should also sue yourself for damages when you get out, Rapaire.

I opened the window here and yelled "the phrase" out into a dark and rainy night. All the dogs in the neighborhood started barking, including the three in this house, and it seemed to go on FOREVER! I blame you for this. You will be hearing from my lawyers.

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: CarolC
Date: 24 Oct 04 - 09:30 PM

Tweed is weird, I'll grant you that, but who isn't around here, eh????

Who said anyone around here isn't weird? Not me, I'll tell you. No sirree, I never said anyone around here isn't weird. Nope not me. No, we're all weird, every last one of us. No "normals" around here...

**looks at ceiling, hands in pockets** (dum te dum te dum dum dum)

(Royal Outhouse)

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 24 Oct 04 - 09:39 PM

Ha! Ha! Ha! Amazing that McGill Porta-Potties would be put on the map, so to speak, by an accordion-playing woman from the USA. Great picture!

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: khandu
Date: 24 Oct 04 - 10:03 PM

I protest this "bath-room" humor from Carol C.!
Being completely uninvolved with this thread, I am nonetheless besmirched by her posting of a picture of me doing my gastronomical duty. What is more private than a visit to a privy? Truly, my rights as a citizen have been bruised with this cruel deed!

The Etherial Kingdom is in a tizzy over your action! This is a dark night in Mississippi.

Kk

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 24 Oct 04 - 10:05 PM

Every friggin' night is dark in Mississippi!

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Oct 04 - 10:10 PM

Of course it's a dark night in Mississippi, Khandu. That's 'cause the sun went down. It gets dark when that happens.

Now, if the sun went down at noon, then it would be a dark afternoon in Mississippi or anywhere else. Or if the sun didn't come up it would be a dark day.

By the way, the cheque or check I sent (for US $23,209,147.17) was cashed. It was endorsed by "Kanj Candooo" and deposited in a bank in Ulaanbaator. I didn't know that you were Mongolian.

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: CarolC
Date: 24 Oct 04 - 10:22 PM

That's funny, khandu. I didn't hear you complaining when you posed for that picture. Nor did I hear you complain when you asked me to be your spokesmodel and point to you while you were posing for the picture.

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: Tweed
Date: 25 Oct 04 - 11:35 AM

Liddle Hargs, I do enjoy nothing more than pinching that old bidet Peneapple's scrawny bottom! HAW! She says she don't, but I know likes it perdy good and wuld feel ignorred if I didn't do it once in a while.

As fore the guest mangement, they habv hit the nail on the head on all counts. I habv attacked my own self and defly anyone to stop me from doing it! Asol, I hope thet more obv you will follow Rawpair and CarolC the CrapperQueen's lead in shouting your assholyness from the windows or rooftops, whichebver is more convenant for you. Posonby, it could habv great effect if shouted inside a loaded tour bus, museum or liberry. Tell the world and they will follow suit and honesty an directness will triumplph obver all!

My apoplexies to Khing Khnazgharr for the continued degradition he suffers from the Royal Porta Potty photo. But it iz a fine picture obv Carol nonetheless, and would look good on a billborad in Sudbury or summwhar. Ar Khing will find thet the nites are longer up thar wif summat more daylite at certain times obv the year. It iz surely cooler than Mizippi, but he will be able to see better while struggling wif hizzelf while in the Royal Chamberpot az he is wont to do. I feel sertain that the influks obv Kudzu into the Holy Khingdom of Mississippi has unsettled him as it did my own self while on hiatus there recently. Kudzu growing on trees thar will take the shape obv groups of giant green people who seem to be in conference wif one another. It is almost like they are wondering what to do about the problem obv cotton crops encroaching upon them. It iz very spooky to view in the twilight hours I can tell you that. Expecially when the wind blows thar arms around and they appear to be gestating to mak thar point better understood. Khing Khardaz'z job is no easy matter and I would hide in a opake outhouse if I wabz in his shoes aslo!

Tweed

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 Oct 04 - 11:47 AM

What are you trying to do? Make jOhn from Hull envious?

I think you're onto a good idea here. I will attempt to gain access to microphones at large public events, supposedly to make some public service announcement, then yell "the phrase" before they realize what I'm up to. In this fashion I hope to become quite well known in Canada and then maybe write a bestselling book whose title will of course be "the phrase".

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: wysiwyg
Date: 25 Oct 04 - 11:57 AM

I know what the probalem was, now. I may or may not be argent but I am usually proclaiming my iggerance (or ignernce depending on your local dialect).

~S~

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: Tweed
Date: 25 Oct 04 - 12:25 PM

Wizzy, that wuld be iggornance. Let me kno if you need enny farther help wif yore spelling, az I am writing a new dictlenary and will try to publish it here on MOAB when it gets complexed.

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: wysiwyg
Date: 25 Oct 04 - 12:39 PM

Have also heard variant IGG'R'NT.

I will consult with Bobbered later this month!

~S~

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: Tweed
Date: 25 Oct 04 - 02:44 PM

You will find thet Boberdz is obv liddle help. He too iz an arrogant asshole but in denile by his own admission. I invite him to free hizzeld by shouting from the top obv his mountain retreat:

I, Boberdzz, am an arrgrant asshole just like the rest obv you.

Boberdzz??? Are you wif me here? Just climb the mountain and be free obv yore constraineds and fedderdz.

Yores,
Tweed

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Oct 04 - 06:29 PM

Is the world large enough to contain the accumulation of arrogant assholity that will result if everyone goes out and shouts The Phrase? Have we world enough and time?

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 25 Oct 04 - 06:39 PM

If the sun doesn't come up how is it day?

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 25 Oct 04 - 08:44 PM

Tweed,
I swear upon my collection of deer-turd necklaces,I never called you an arrogant asshole...

all in one sentence.

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: Tweed
Date: 26 Oct 04 - 11:54 AM

You share my taste in fine geegaws, Rustic. I myself wear a rabbit turd headdress arranged into corn-rows with small bells attached, but only while posting here at MOAB. I find that it clears my mind summat, and am able to think more lucite. I am certain though thet you must have called me a stupid, silly, ignorant, crazed, or some other adverb during our long simmering romance. ;~)
Posonby it is penelope I am thinking of who has paid me such complemends in the past.

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: Tweed
Date: 28 Oct 04 - 04:58 PM

Dammit!! I thought certain that the mental image of "a rabbit turd headdress arranged into corn-rows with small bells attached", would elevate this thread to new heights of absurdity and cause madness and mouth foaming to spread like SARS.

After much thought I have come to the conclusion that I will no longer be associated with arrogant assholes....no, I am of higher Ilk than that. I will henceforth be known as

Tweed, the Flaming Asshole.

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Oct 04 - 06:42 PM

Being a simple, plain sort of chap I don't have time for such folderol and headresses. Just a simple gimme cap is fine with me, something advertising seed corn or tractors.

That's all I wear, and boy, it's starting to get cold!

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: khandu
Date: 28 Oct 04 - 07:31 PM

It is clear that Tweed wears his absurd headdress in an effort to emulate my Royal Self, King khandu of the Etherial Kingdom of Mississippi, whom Tweed desires to be! Little does he realize that the Royal Cherokee Headwear which I so proudly don is a sign of a covenant between my Royal Self & Chief Boi-Ardee of the Knookie-knook tribe which forbids the wearing of the unclean turds of rabbits any where above the navel or anywhere below the goonads.

Further, the Honored Covenant aslo forbids the burning of "noxious gasses which are expelled from the relaxed sphincter of the holes of asses". In non-Royal terms, that means it forbids flaming assholes.

Tweed, there is no need to try to promote yourself this way? Was it not enough that I gave you a kid-sized reasonable facsimile of my
Royal Headwear (with attached gee-gaws!)? Or that I gave you a Porta-Potty made as a replica of my Royal Throne? Can you not be happy just being the greatly needed Royal KOTROT & Asshole you are?

Come to your senses Man! Anyone can be a Flaming Asshole!

Kk

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: khandu
Date: 28 Oct 04 - 07:34 PM

I meant to say "Hell. . . Even Rapaire can be a F.A. !

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Oct 04 - 10:01 PM

I am humbled by such noblesse oblige.

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: Tweed
Date: 29 Oct 04 - 03:45 PM

I am humbelled aslo, khing Khnakwortz. Obv corse you are correct and most royal in all things. Pa is the only true flaming asshole and I could nebver hop of completing with him. Yaz, I am just another asshole with no accootermens needed. I hbv done away with my headress at yore behast and found that if unstrung, makes a fine crouton and a welcome addition to salads and even meatloaf filler,although I'm summat at a loss for what to do with the bells.
I remain obv corse,
Yores,
Tweed
K.O.T.R.O.T. and Nobleffe Asshole

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Oct 04 - 05:19 PM

If Tweed is no longer an AA, and I'm not one, Khandu is the only one left, right? And if that is right, then Khandu, who is king and therefore must always be right, can't be left and hence not an AA, and that means that Tweed must still be one even though he is not.

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: khandu
Date: 29 Oct 04 - 05:54 PM

Your logic is impeccable! I am awed! Hmmmmm. . . did I ever offer you a place in the Royal Counsul?

Kk

Subject: RE: BS: Tweed is an arrogant asshole!
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Oct 04 - 06:32 PM

Impeccable logic has always been one of my many strong points.