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BS: Monty python quotes
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Subject: BS: Monty python quotes From: skipy Date: 07 Nov 04 - 08:19 PM Monty Python is now 30+ years old, but still we hear quotes from the shows several times a week, or is it just that I hang around with sad poeple? Use this thread to report Python quotes that you hear during this week, if we don't hear any then the thread will drift to the bottom of the list & die. Today a friend of mine said "Fear, pain, & surprise" Skipy |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Steve Latimer Date: 07 Nov 04 - 08:34 PM Well, 'ow'd you get to be King then? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: freightdawg Date: 07 Nov 04 - 08:36 PM "And now for something completely different..." Freightdawg |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: The Fooles Troupe Date: 07 Nov 04 - 08:37 PM "He's gotta be the President - he's covered in Shit" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Metchosin Date: 07 Nov 04 - 09:22 PM Her Majesty is like a stream of bat piss. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Dave Hanson Date: 07 Nov 04 - 09:26 PM I wish I'd said that. You will Oscar, you will. eric |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull Date: 07 Nov 04 - 09:48 PM I'm Brian, and so is my wife. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: beardedbruce Date: 07 Nov 04 - 10:02 PM Mind if we call you Bruce to keep things clear? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Dave Hanson Date: 07 Nov 04 - 10:07 PM G'day Bruce, How are you Bruce ? I'm a bit crook Bruce, just saw a pommy streaker in the Earls Court road. Must have looked like a bald wallaby |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Metchosin Date: 07 Nov 04 - 10:10 PM say no more, say no more |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Dave Hanson Date: 07 Nov 04 - 10:19 PM Yes Michael |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: The Fooles Troupe Date: 07 Nov 04 - 10:22 PM Nudge Nudge, Wink Wink! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: GUEST,SueB Date: 08 Nov 04 - 01:09 AM He's not dead, he's just sleeping. He is not sleeping! This parrot is defunct! Does it have to be Monty Python? from Young Frankenstein, "Put..zhe kendle...beck!" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Wilfried Schaum Date: 08 Nov 04 - 02:53 AM Just found it in an interesting article by Michael Moore: Always look on the bright side of life. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: denise:^) Date: 08 Nov 04 - 03:32 AM "Run away; run away..." |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: George Papavgeris Date: 08 Nov 04 - 03:37 AM "Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!" "NO - not the comfy cushion!" "Apart from the aquaducts, roads etc etc, what did the Romans ever do for us?" "You had a hole in the road, and you think YOU had it rough?" "This is getting silly!" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: s6k Date: 08 Nov 04 - 04:05 AM he puts on womens clothing, and hangs around in bars |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Dead Horse Date: 08 Nov 04 - 04:15 AM Albatross! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Jeanie Date: 08 Nov 04 - 04:47 AM Alan Titchmarsh, in his latest TV natural history extravaganza, talked about "The Mighty Scots Pine." Said by my daughter this very morning on school run (and for no particular reason I could fathom): "Bad Zoot ! Wicked Zoot ! Naughty Zoot !" I'll listen out for more quotes this week, skipy - I'm sure there'll be some. As you say, so many of their expressions have become common parlance. It's interesting that first generation Python watchers are passing on a love of the Python humour and expressions etc. to the next lot. Of the comdey around at the moment, it is phrases from "Little Britain" that I'm hearing most often (in our household, at least) e.g. "I'm a laydy", "If you ask me on a Monday, I'd say yase..." - jeanie |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: The DeanMeister Date: 08 Nov 04 - 04:57 AM "We are the Knights who say...Ni...!!" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Ellenpoly Date: 08 Nov 04 - 05:00 AM French Soldier : I don't want to talk to you no more, you empty headed animal food trough wiper. I fart in your general direction. Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries. From; http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0071853/quotes |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Jeanie Date: 08 Nov 04 - 05:08 AM My daughter does the "hamster/elderberry" one a lot. I'll have to see if she says it this week. For Skipy's "learned research" (as in the first post here) it would be good if people added who they had heard using the Python quotes this week and in what context. Very interesting (...aah...but that was another show entirely !) - jeanie |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: muppett Date: 08 Nov 04 - 05:13 AM Your Lupins or your life? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Paco Rabanne Date: 08 Nov 04 - 05:14 AM "my hovercaft is full of eels" from the suspect Belgian phrase book. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: greg stephens Date: 08 Nov 04 - 05:20 AM Not a lot of people know this, but Terry Jones is known to sing folk songs from time to time, and I have recordings to prove it. I appreciate that this is not a quote from Monty Python, but it does tie the thread to Mudcat a little more closely. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Dead Horse Date: 08 Nov 04 - 06:23 AM Danger! There are Llamas! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: jacqui.c Date: 08 Nov 04 - 06:40 AM Gannet on a stick - said by me when reading the book 'Silverlock' out loud to Kendall and coming to the passage referring to the Ancient Mariner and the albatross..... Since we are both Python fans we use quotes a lot of the time - I'm still waiting for a chance to use 'rat souffle'. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: sledge Date: 08 Nov 04 - 07:05 AM He's not the Messiah, he's a very naughty boy! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: GUEST,kingcobra Date: 08 Nov 04 - 08:03 AM "Dinsdale"! (squashed hedgehog) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: clueless don Date: 08 Nov 04 - 08:36 AM zwei peanuts vere valking down die strasse und vun of zem vas assaulted ... peanut (hee, hee, hee) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Dave Hanson Date: 08 Nov 04 - 08:53 AM I've told you once. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: The Beast of Farlington Date: 08 Nov 04 - 09:08 AM No, you haven't. Maybe we should start a thread for Python misquotes that you have heard Like ' the comfy cushion' which was actually 'the comfy chair' Wjile they are all saying 'the comfy chair', Radio 4 will explode |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Charmion Date: 08 Nov 04 - 09:20 AM "THERE IS NO RULE SIX!" "It's not dead; it's asleep." I work in an office at the Department of National Defence. These lines come up frequently, sometimes even out loud. "I seem to have come over all esurient." At lunch-time, any given lunch-time. "Run away, run away!" Especially at quitting time. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: The Fooles Troupe Date: 08 Nov 04 - 09:31 AM Actually the French Knight (I fart in your general direction!) scene has a weird link to reality - the English were besieging a certain French castle which ran out of food, except of bread, cheese and garlic. In the tradition in the village today, allegedly the smell of the French Farts was so bad it drove the English away.... I'm not making this up you know... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: The DeanMeister Date: 08 Nov 04 - 09:35 AM "Crucifixion?" .... "Nah, freedom, mate." |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Bat Goddess Date: 08 Nov 04 - 09:44 AM "Oi'll 'ave the lot." Wahfer thin mint I seem to quote "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" (all of the books, radio shows, etc.) a lot, too. Linn |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: HuwG Date: 08 Nov 04 - 10:12 AM Quotes from Monty Python's Life of Brian |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Tweed Date: 08 Nov 04 - 10:12 AM HAW!! This one allus meks me larf and larf. From memory, it goes.... Sir Bedevere : There are ways of telling whether she is a witch. Peasant 1 : Are there? Oh well, tell us. Sir Bedevere : Tell me. What do you do with witches? Peasant 1 : Burn them. Sir Bedevere : And what do you burn, apart from witches? Peasant 1 : More witches. Peasant 2 : Wood. Sir Bedevere : Good. Now, why do witches burn? Peasant 3 : ...because they're made of... wood? Sir Bedevere : Good. So how do you tell whether she is made of wood? Peasant 1 : Build a bridge out of her. Sir Bedevere : But can you not also build bridges out of stone? Peasant 1 : Oh yeah. Sir Bedevere : Does wood sink in water? Peasant 1 : No, no, it floats!... It floats! Throw her into the pond! Sir Bedevere : No, no. What else floats in water? Peasant 1 : Bread. Peasant 2 : Apples. Peasant 3 : Very small rocks. Peasant 1 : Cider. Peasant 2 : Gravy. Peasant 3 : Cherries. Peasant 1 : Mud. Peasant 2 : Churches. Peasant 3 : Lead! Lead! King Arthur : A Duck. Sir Bedevere : ...Exactly. So, logically... Peasant 1 : If she weighed the same as a duck... she's made of wood. Sir Bedevere : And therefore... Peasant 2 : ...A witch! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Dave Hanson Date: 08 Nov 04 - 10:31 AM Yes you are the Messiah and I should know I've followed a few, All right I am the Messiah........... now FUCK OFF. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Splott Man Date: 08 Nov 04 - 10:56 AM I drink, therefore I am. (One of my directors today) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: muppitz Date: 08 Nov 04 - 11:13 AM "Can we 'ave your Liver?" The meaning of life. muppitz x |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Kim C Date: 08 Nov 04 - 11:15 AM "I'm not old. I'm 37." (having fun saying that this year, since I really AM 37!) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: sledge Date: 08 Nov 04 - 11:21 AM "And how shall we fuck off my lord" (close enough) "she turned me into a newt__________________but i got better" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Metchosin Date: 08 Nov 04 - 11:21 AM In honour of Arthur, our daughter started calling her Dad "Jimmy Twosheds" when he erected a second aluminum garden storage shed for the back yard. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: muppett Date: 08 Nov 04 - 11:26 AM The 4 yorkshire men sketch, I used t' live in a cardboard box, Cardboard box luxury |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: ToulouseCruise Date: 08 Nov 04 - 11:27 AM I am the Grim Reaper! Well, I don't blame you for being grim, with this weather we've been having... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Ellenpoly Date: 08 Nov 04 - 12:03 PM "Blessed are the Cheese Makers." |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Tannywheeler Date: 08 Nov 04 - 12:38 PM Deep sigh of satisfaction. I don't get out much, or mix with people of such great taste and perspicacity. But I was watching a tv show on glaciers with a grandchild the other day, and when the narrator mentioned "fjords", I had to step out of the room -- fjords being what the parrot pined for. I lost it. Tw |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: GUEST,Wordless Woman Date: 08 Nov 04 - 04:43 PM George Bush recently gave me an opportunity to parody a Python quote. During the presidential campaign the subject of the shortage in flu vaccines and what would be done about it arose. Bush's solution: "Don't get sick." To which I shouted at the TV, "Nobody expects the Spanish Influenza!" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: skipy Date: 08 Nov 04 - 07:18 PM I don't care how fuckin runny it is |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Cluin Date: 08 Nov 04 - 07:20 PM Want to come back to my place?... Alright. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: kendall Date: 08 Nov 04 - 09:30 PM I'm invincible! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Splott Man Date: 09 Nov 04 - 02:31 AM At least one of the above predates Python and is from At Last The 1948 Show. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: George Papavgeris Date: 09 Nov 04 - 04:21 AM "No, it's not a pun, it's - what d' you call it - a palindrome!" "A palindrome of Bolton would be Notlob" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Dave Hanson Date: 09 Nov 04 - 04:49 AM Shut that fucking bouzouki player up. Albatross for christs sake. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Stu Date: 09 Nov 04 - 05:45 AM Arthur "Two Sheds" Jackson |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Liam of the Ferry Date: 09 Nov 04 - 08:22 AM "Blue............. NO YELLOW.....AGHH" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: GUEST,Vic at work Date: 09 Nov 04 - 09:18 AM Didn't Arthur Two Sheds have a friend called Keith Maniac of Guatamala? A Pointed Stick (Its in the accent and pronunciation!) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Dave Bryant Date: 09 Nov 04 - 09:32 AM This is getting silly. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Greyeyes Date: 09 Nov 04 - 10:08 AM Are there any women here? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: GUEST,Dáithí Ó Geanainn Date: 09 Nov 04 - 11:14 AM ...also from the Hungarian phrase book: "My nipples explode with delight!" "You wanna come back my place, bouncy-bouncy?" and how come , in the week of its relaunch, has nobody mentioned....SPAM (spam, sppam, spam, spam, eggs and spam) Trying to reach JeanPaul Sartre on the phone: "Well, when will he be free?" "He's been trying to work that out for sixty years" D |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Fibula Mattock Date: 09 Nov 04 - 11:18 AM "We 'ave already got one. It'z veery niiice." [a grail] |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: GUEST,Mingulay Date: 09 Nov 04 - 11:35 AM All we 'ad to eat was a 'andful of 'ot gravel. 'Ot gravel. LUXURY! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Greyeyes Date: 09 Nov 04 - 12:02 PM Well, blessed is just about everyone with a vested interest in the status quo, as far as I can tell, Reg. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: YorkshireYankee Date: 09 Nov 04 - 01:26 PM Well, the word "spam" itself – used to refer to unwanted e-mail messages – originated out of references to the Spam Sketch, so any time you hear the word "spam" used in that way, it's a Python reference (although rarely a conscious one). The following is not a recent sighting, but it's so good I have to share it: Punt & Dennis on their Radio 4 programme "The Now Show" were discussing the takeover of the Abbey National (a major chain of banks) by Spain's Banco Sant Andere, giving rise to the comment (all together now!) "Nobody expects the Spanish Acquisition!" I laughed out loud. Those guys are brilliant! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: ToulouseCruise Date: 09 Nov 04 - 02:10 PM Okay... the Hungarian Phrase Book... been a while since I have seen it... what movie would that be a part of, "And Now for Something Completely Different!"? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: GUEST,Chief Chaos Date: 09 Nov 04 - 02:22 PM Somewhat related, When my kids learned what spam actually stood for they began investigating other possibilities like: Spiced Pork = SPORK Spiced Chicken = SPICKEN Spiced Broccoli = Sproccoli It quickly degenerated into giggles and fell apart. "Is that a European swallow or an African Swallow? I don't know....Aaaaaaaggggghhhhhhhh! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: annamill Date: 09 Nov 04 - 02:28 PM "..butI'm not dead yet!! "Yes you are!" Boing! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: HuwG Date: 09 Nov 04 - 03:22 PM Yorkshire Yankee, the Spanish bank in question was actually the "Banco Santander", but this doesn't spoil the joke. While serving behind a bar the Sunday after the show, I saw two of my friends being bored to tears as someone pontificated about the takeover. I copied the same line. My friends spat beer through their noses. The self-opinionated one later tried to tell me (unsuccessfully) to know my place. If I have a favourite Python sketch (as opposed to single quote) it is John Cleese correcting Graham Chapman's latin graffiti in "Life of Brian". To appreciate the full humour of the sketch, one had to have had Latin inflicted on one as a subject at a Grammar or Public school, which I why I was rolling about on the floor of the cinema where I first saw the film, while everyone else stared at me and wondered what institution I had escaped from. Python came out with many quotes which aren't funny in themselves, but remind many of the unforgettable sketches. Even the sketches sometimes were made memorable by Python's inspired continuity. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: GUEST,milk monitor Date: 09 Nov 04 - 03:35 PM Ah, I see you have machine that goes "Ping." |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: *Laura* Date: 09 Nov 04 - 03:48 PM "Inflamation of the foreskin reminds me of your smile...." |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: HuwG Date: 09 Nov 04 - 03:59 PM Ooops ! Could the thread monitors turn off the italics after "Banco Santander" in my last post ? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: GUEST,dipwad Date: 09 Nov 04 - 04:15 PM Are there any women here? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: *Laura* Date: 09 Nov 04 - 04:29 PM "Now we see the violence inherit in the system! Come and see the violence inherit in the system! Help! Help! I'm. Being. Repressed! Did you see him repressing me? You saw it din't you!?!?" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Rich(bodhránai gan ciall) Date: 09 Nov 04 - 05:27 PM I periodically catch myself using "so big, so big, so hugely big" from the Monty Python interlude at the "Concert for George"(Harrison), filmed at the Royal Albert Hall. Rich |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Kim C Date: 09 Nov 04 - 05:38 PM And now, the man with three buttocks. (or something like that...) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: *Laura* Date: 09 Nov 04 - 05:54 PM A man with nine legs! - He ran away! Oh bloody hell |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: *Laura* Date: 09 Nov 04 - 05:57 PM (actor father to coal-mining son) London not good enough for you!! You had to go poncing off to Barnsley!!! - Coal mining is a wonderful thing father. But it's something you'll never understand! Your head is addled with novels and poems, and look at mother - she's tired out with meeting film stars and giving gala luncheons... - THERES NOWT WRONG WI' GALA LUNCHEONS!!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: LilyFestre Date: 09 Nov 04 - 05:58 PM We are no longer the knights who say, "Nee" We are now the knights who say, "Icky, icky, icky......PA-TANG!" Michelle |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Liz the Squeak Date: 09 Nov 04 - 06:34 PM One I used frequently at work..... 'larks tongues, otter noses, get 'em while they're hot'.... usually when handing out the post. I'm very misunderstood at work.... I'm also frequently seen being a 'Gumby'.... but without the headgear... LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Liz the Squeak Date: 09 Nov 04 - 06:37 PM For some reason, I keep coming across opportunities to sing 'sit on my face and tell me that you love me'.... Must resist urge,, must resist urge.... LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Dave Hanson Date: 10 Nov 04 - 04:38 AM Oh Mrs Niggerbaiters exploded. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: chris nightbird childs Date: 10 Nov 04 - 04:42 AM Is she dead??? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Peter K (Fionn) Date: 10 Nov 04 - 05:21 AM What a silly bunt! — and the rest of the preamble to the travel-agency monologue. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Greyeyes Date: 10 Nov 04 - 11:53 AM Thank you, Karl. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Bill D Date: 10 Nov 04 - 12:31 PM "bring out your dead" "I don't WAN'T to go on the cart" "I'm getting better!" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: clueless don Date: 10 Nov 04 - 01:11 PM Warning! Lark's vomit! Don |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: *Laura* Date: 10 Nov 04 - 04:27 PM - Larks vomit! It should put that on the box! - Don't be ridiculous - our sales would plummet! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Raedwulf Date: 10 Nov 04 - 05:19 PM Trouble at mill! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: *Laura* Date: 10 Nov 04 - 05:29 PM So, logically, if she weighs the same as a duck - she's made of wood! And therefore... A WITCH! A WITCH! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Big Al Whittle Date: 10 Nov 04 - 06:20 PM that's not nearly silly enough |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: moonglow Date: 10 Nov 04 - 07:46 PM there's one I get many opportunities to say-: "oh, you're no fun anymore" I also have a few of the quotes with actual sound links to them set as sounds on my computer. For example, when I log in, it says "this is an ex-parrot!". When a warning comes up (something finishes downloading), it either says "oh bloody hell," or "(twang) message for you, sir." Finally, when I log off, it says "how shall we fuck off, O Lord?" Surprisingly, many of my friends are Python/ Tom Lehrer fans. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: GUEST Date: 10 Nov 04 - 07:51 PM Does Yorkshire Yankee or anyone else know the date of the joke by Steve Punt and Hugh Dennis about the Spanish Acquisition (ie of the Abbey National Building Society by the Bank of Santander)? I am interested because I thought of the exact same joke on 26th July 2004 after seeing a TV program that evening about the takeover; I mentioned this joke in a private E-mail on 27th July and another one to a different person on 2nd September 2004 (in the latter I said "Remember you heard it here first"). Honestly folks, this isn't a boast about what a great originator of jokes I am (HE SAID MODESTLY!), but am genuinely curious as to how quickly different people think of something like this and how quickly it circulates. I remember thinking at the time that it would probably be a very short time before a headline like "Nobody expects the Spanish Acquisition" appeared in a newspaper. I did an Internet search for "Spanish Acquisition at that time" and though I got some "hits" I didn't get in the above form. If you are aware of one of Monty Pythons most famous sketches then this is a very obvious pun. Strangely, no individual "Monty Python" quote seems to be all that common, although "Don't mention the war" by ex Python John Cleese in the Fawlty Towers Episode about the Germans is certainly heard quite often. I also like Basil Fawlty's phrase "I'm so sorry, he's from Barcelona" and (Basil Fawlty to Manuel) "(Do?)You have rats in Spain, or did Franco have them all shot?" One of my own genuine Python favourites is "The Polar Bear's escaped", delivered in a high pitch voice, though I haven't actually heard anyone else use it. There was also a Pythonesque interview featuring the late Graham Chapman as a Government Minister": Interviewer (possibly Eric Idle or Michael Palin): "Minister, in your manisfesto, you promised to build over 10 million houses(or some preposterous figure) in the Greater London area alone; you have in fact built only three. How do you answer this?" Minister: "I'd like to answer this question, if I may, in 2 ways. First of all in my normal voice, and secondly, using a kind of silly high-pitched squeak". John Cleese's father was originally called John Cheese, but changed it to Cleese in the Army in 1915 to avoid being teased (I would have thought being teased in the Army in 1915 was the least of your worries as this was in the middle of World War One. Pity though he changed it, this would have made his son John a "big Cheese" (geddit?) Cleese himself regrets the name change and thinks it would be good to be called Jack Cheese (his wife calls him Jack). He has also traced the surname Cheese to Norwich in 1273, though Cleese himself came from Weston Super Mare in Somerset at the other end of England. HERE ENDETH THE HISTORY LESSON |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: HuwG Date: 11 Nov 04 - 12:05 AM Dear Guest, I believe that the "Spanish Acquisistion" line came in the last episode of the Punt and Dennis series before the currect series of the "News Quiz" (which itself has just finished). If I am right, it was therefore broadcast on October 7th. (Friday) I may be out by a week or so, but I doubt whether it was broadcast before October 1st. I shall now break one of my earlier rules ... "I never wanted to do this job anyway. I always wanted to be ... a Lumberjack !" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Cluin Date: 11 Nov 04 - 03:46 AM What ho, Squiffy! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Dave the Gnome Date: 11 Nov 04 - 09:13 AM Your mother was a hampster and your father smells of elderberries. You king artur and you sill engish keniggets, I vave my private parts at your aunty. :D |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: GUEST,Garydon Date: 11 Nov 04 - 09:59 AM |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: GUEST,Gary Date: 11 Nov 04 - 10:00 AM The Larch |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Paco Rabanne Date: 11 Nov 04 - 10:13 AM 99 |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Paco Rabanne Date: 11 Nov 04 - 10:13 AM 100. I thank you! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: GUEST Date: 11 Nov 04 - 02:13 PM Thanks HuwG - perhaps I beat Punt and Dennis to it with the Spanish Acquisition! "I thank you" - wasn't that the late British comedian Arthur Askey, many years before Monty Python was even heard of? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: *Laura* Date: 11 Nov 04 - 04:54 PM Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government! [though possibly better than an american election - my bracket] I mean - You can't go round being king just cos some watery tart threw a sword at you! Listen! Supreme exectutive power comes from a mandate from the masses! Not from some farcical equatic ceremony! I mean - if I went round saying I was an emperor just cos some moistened bint had lobbed a scimitar at me they'd put me away!!! - classic. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Liz the Squeak Date: 11 Nov 04 - 05:53 PM I got to use a proper one at work!!! I sent an Email concerning a forthcoming meal suggestion with the words... 'I like Chinese', Spent the rest of my working day humming it with a smug look. Maybe I should go back on the medication after all..... LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Jim Dixon Date: 11 Nov 04 - 08:16 PM "Marcel Proust had an elk, and if you're calling the author of A la Recherche du Temps Perdu a loony, I shall have to ask you to step outside." |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull Date: 12 Nov 04 - 12:56 AM a paper bag in the middle of the road? luxury! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Dave Hanson Date: 12 Nov 04 - 05:00 AM Yes Michael, I go to church regularly. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Greyeyes Date: 12 Nov 04 - 09:53 AM Stwike him, Centuwion, vewy woughly! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Liz the Squeak Date: 12 Nov 04 - 10:23 AM Thwow him to the fwoor!!! LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: GUEST,jacqui.c Date: 12 Nov 04 - 12:44 PM Don't call me Eddie. Can I call you Eddie baby? My name is Ann Elk. This is my theory on brontosauruses. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Rich(bodhránai gan ciall) Date: 12 Nov 04 - 05:20 PM I hadn't thought of it as a Monty Python quote, but I have been saying "Well I didn't vote for him" a lot lately! Rich |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Ima Gittin' Date: 12 Nov 04 - 05:22 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: *Laura* Date: 12 Nov 04 - 05:26 PM Well - I'll ask eem, but ah don't zink ee'l be very keen, ahh, ee's already got one, you see! What? Are you Sure? Oh yes, ees very nice! (I told eem we already got one - snort snort giggle giggle) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Tannywheeler Date: 12 Nov 04 - 05:43 PM WOW!!!!! As I sit here wishing I had the quick mind to contribute Ima Gittin's mobile comment is drifting by above me. Effin' MAGIC, man! I obviously missed some serious education, with my spotty Python viewing. Is there a Remedial Python program somewhere? I gotta see the one about the Lady of the Lake, among others. But not Dead Parrot. That one makes me wet my pants. moonglow, it stands to reason you'd have friends with like interests. Python/Lehrer: 2 major food groups of the mind, imho. Tw |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Barb'ry Date: 12 Nov 04 - 06:29 PM Eric the half a bee - my kids had that sung to them instead of lullabies. The word 'pissant' (Emmanuel Cant was a ..) is used frequently in this house! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Cluin Date: 13 Nov 04 - 03:22 AM Top-hole. Bally Jerry pranged his kite right in the how's-your-father; hairy blighter, dicky-birded, feathered back on his sammy, took a waspy, flipped over on his Betty Harpers and caught his can in the Bertie. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Metchosin Date: 13 Nov 04 - 04:32 AM You may embrace me. I am no longer infected. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Liz the Squeak Date: 13 Nov 04 - 04:45 AM TAnny - the lady in the lake bit is from the film 'MP and the Holy Grail'... from which comes 'Camelot', possibly one of the best Python songs. The DVD has the song done in Lego models.... ah..... bliss! Oh, and my favourite at this time of the year.... The Larch. (the only deciduous conifer, turns the most delightful golden colour, easily spotted) Limpit was first introduced to the world in a hospital ward called 'Larch'.... no-one understood why I was giggling so much. LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Greyeyes Date: 13 Nov 04 - 05:41 AM What's so special about the cheesemakers? Well, obviously it's not meant to be taken literally, it refers to any manufacturer of dairy products. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: GUEST,John O'Lennaine Date: 13 Nov 04 - 08:47 AM Brian: "You are all individuals!" Crowd: "Yes Lord, we are all individuals!" One person up the front: "I'm not." |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Dave Hanson Date: 13 Nov 04 - 09:18 AM Off you go, your not even a proper woman. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: *Laura* Date: 13 Nov 04 - 05:05 PM Ralph the Wonder Llama! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: The Fooles Troupe Date: 13 Nov 04 - 06:01 PM Yeah, we're still wondering... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Desert Dancer Date: 14 Nov 04 - 02:24 PM Full page ad in today's New York Times: "SPAMalot a new musical lovingly ripped off from the motion picture Month Python and the Holy Grail, starring David Hyde Pierce, Tim Curry, Hank Azaria; Book and lyrics by Eric Idle, Music by John Du Prez and Eric Idle, directed by Mike Nichols." !!! ~ Becky in Tucson |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Desert Dancer Date: 14 Nov 04 - 02:27 PM Actually, to be precise, Monty Python's SPAMalot (and that was Monty Python and the Holy..., rather than Month Python, of course). ~ B in T whose son recently ran around the neighborhood in a white robe saying "I'm a blancmange!" (to the mystification of many of our neighbors) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: *Laura* Date: 14 Nov 04 - 02:28 PM "Are you a virgin? If it's not a personal question." |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: vanessathecat Date: 14 Nov 04 - 05:41 PM We did bananas last week! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: clueless don Date: 15 Nov 04 - 12:39 PM "She's a bit ugly, sir." "What do you mean, ugly?" "I mean not attractive to men, sir!" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull Date: 15 Nov 04 - 08:38 PM Don't you want to haggle? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: GUEST,milk monitor Date: 15 Nov 04 - 08:44 PM Welease Woger |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Greyeyes Date: 16 Nov 04 - 10:13 AM "You men... you were raped?" "Well, at first." |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Big Al Whittle Date: 16 Nov 04 - 11:32 AM Salad Days directed by Sam Peckinpah |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Greyeyes Date: 16 Nov 04 - 02:55 PM That should of course read "You MEAN...you were raped?" "Well, at first" Absolutely no men were raped at all. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: *Laura* Date: 16 Nov 04 - 03:16 PM 'Have I got a big nose mum?' 'Sex sex sex - that's ALL you think about!' |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Dave Hanson Date: 17 Nov 04 - 06:01 AM Wensleydale ? yes sir ? right I'll have some of that, no sir that's my name sir, Mister Wensleydale |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: GUEST,quokka Date: 13 Oct 09 - 07:50 AM Reg: "What's the point of fighting for his right to have babies, if he can't have babies?" Francis: "It's symbolic of our struggle against oppression." Reg: "Symbolic of his struggle against reality!" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: SINSULL Date: 13 Oct 09 - 08:12 AM "...gently killed and lightly coated in lark's vomit." "But if we took out the spring, there'd be no surprise." |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Dave Hanson Date: 13 Oct 09 - 08:50 AM Q. And what other interests do you have besides summarising Proust ? A. stangling animals, golf and masturbating. Dave H |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: quokka Date: 13 Oct 09 - 10:03 AM Last week at work a woman walked in looking EXACTLY like Brian's Mum. I got a fit of the giggles and eventually spluttered out "Like a rat out of an aqueduct" everyone got it straight away - Python is truly a universal language ;-) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Wesley S Date: 13 Oct 09 - 10:12 AM My favorite Python quotes are : "Badges - we don't need no stinking badges" And "Rosebud". |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: kendall Date: 13 Oct 09 - 01:23 PM My Hovercraft is full of eels. I'd love to use that someday. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: VirginiaTam Date: 13 Oct 09 - 02:38 PM Not heard any quotes lately, but physical humour. Not too long ago, a colleague likened the potential of a project they were working on as having the Monty Python "big foot" come down and squash it. Due to my arthritis, I figure my future is going to be full of Silly Walks. Oh I do quite often say - My brain hurts and It'll have to come out. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Ed T Date: 13 Oct 09 - 05:45 PM And suddenly, without warning....nothing happened. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Ed T Date: 13 Oct 09 - 05:49 PM Pork http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C-Ta4XbRRj4 |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Ed T Date: 13 Oct 09 - 06:06 PM Michael Palin): And now for the first time ever on record we proudly present the 1972 Eclipse of the Sun! John Cleese: Well, here we are at Lords, waiting for the eclipse of the sun... Eric Idle: Yes, the ground's in tip-top condition and I think we can expect some first rate eclipsing this morning.. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: kendall Date: 13 Oct 09 - 09:37 PM Vivian Smith Smyth Smith, Upper class Twit of the year. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Gurney Date: 13 Oct 09 - 10:37 PM (To Michaelangelo.) "Look! I'm the bloody Pope! I may not know much about art, but I know what I like!" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Marion Date: 13 Oct 09 - 10:40 PM Are you suggesting that coconuts migrate? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Lonesome EJ Date: 14 Oct 09 - 01:48 AM My favorite British Office Holder is still the "Minister of Running Up the Stairs Two at a Time and Shouting out Ha Ha Mabel I Caught You". |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Tug the Cox Date: 14 Oct 09 - 09:01 PM Lemon Curry! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: SPB-Cooperator Date: 15 Oct 09 - 05:48 AM Semprini hey vic, don't name the baby.... aww shucks, too late.... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Becca72 Date: 15 Oct 09 - 08:45 AM "It's not a question of where he grips it..." |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Marion Date: 15 Oct 09 - 10:24 AM "... it's a question of weight ratios." |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Tug the Cox Date: 15 Oct 09 - 11:55 AM Oh God, who said Mattress. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: SINSULL Date: 15 Oct 09 - 01:20 PM And a sad commentary oncurrent day Pyhonists: http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/comment/columnists/jeremy_clarkson/article6869288.ece |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: The Spartan Date: 15 Oct 09 - 09:50 PM Help! Help! I'm being repressed! Come see the violence inherent in the system! She turned me into a newt! a newt? .........I got better. How do you know she is a witch? ........She looks like one. Ni! And now for something completely different...... I don't wanna talk to you no more you empty headed animal food trough wiper, I fart in your general direction! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: The Spartan Date: 15 Oct 09 - 09:55 PM "Bring up the holy hand grenade!" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: kendall Date: 18 Oct 09 - 05:21 PM That Rabbit is a killer! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Ed T Date: 18 Oct 09 - 05:29 PM One I recall, but can't seem to locate, a MP contest-quiz-skit where contestants are invited to state a claim....and one person claims he wrote an ancient poets poems (maybe Shalkespear) and his wife wrote his sonnets. Anyone know which skit this was? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: clueless don Date: 19 Oct 09 - 09:14 AM Ed T, I think the skit was called "State your Claim". I think I have it on one of their records. Don |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: clueless don Date: 21 Oct 09 - 01:41 PM Turns out it was "Stake your claim". A transcript may be found here. Don |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: theman2 Date: 21 Oct 09 - 06:14 PM The Spam song! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: SqueezeMe Date: 22 Oct 09 - 08:16 AM "Pray that there's intelegent life somewhere up in space, 'cos there's bugger all down here on earth". |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Mrrzy Date: 22 Oct 09 - 12:29 PM Saw Life of Brian again last night. What a great movie. Wish I could remember any of the lines... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: MGM·Lion Date: 22 Oct 09 - 01:38 PM Well, if you've forgotten them all already, then you're not the Messiah, you're a very naughty boay! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Dave the Gnome Date: 23 Oct 09 - 06:55 AM Yes, well, that's the sort of blinkered, philistine pig ignorance I've come to expect from you non-creative garbage. You sit there on your loathsome, spotty behinds squeezing blackheads, not caring a tinker's cuss for the struggling artist. You excrement! You whining, hypocritical toadies, with your colour TV sets and your Tony Jacklin golf clubs and your bleeding Masonic secret handshakes! You wouldn't let me join, would you, you blackballing bastards! Well, I wouldn't become a freemason now if you went down on your lousy, stinking knees and begged me! :D (eG) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Tug the Cox Date: 23 Oct 09 - 08:00 AM In 3rd place....the sprouts. In 2nd, the Phlegms. But the winner is.... Miserable, Fat, Belgian Bastards. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Den Date: 23 Oct 09 - 10:48 AM I'm rather fond of dogs, (click) fond of dogs, (click) fond of dogs, (click) fond of dogs, (click) fond of dogs... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Lonesome EJ Date: 23 Oct 09 - 12:10 PM "That's not an argument! It's simply a direct refutation of every point I make!" "No it's not." |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Neil D Date: 24 Oct 09 - 01:06 AM and now, something completely different I'm a lumberjack and I'm okay |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: MGM·Lion Date: 24 Oct 09 - 01:40 AM Pythonesquely Pedantic note for Neil D — Please get it right: "And Now FOR Something Completely Different' — If You Please !!! ... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Ed T Date: 24 Oct 09 - 09:48 AM Thanks, Don, It was just as funny as I remember. Nice to have it agian. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Lonesome EJ Date: 24 Oct 09 - 12:17 PM Your lupins or your life! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Tug the Cox Date: 24 Oct 09 - 12:46 PM Kevin Moore kevin Moore riding through the Glen Steals from ther poor Gives to the rich.......silly bitch |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: robomatic Date: 24 Oct 09 - 02:17 PM "Take THAT, Mary, Queen of Scots!" "Adapted for radio by BANGIN' ON IT WITH A HAMMER!" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Ed T Date: 24 Oct 09 - 02:45 PM My theory, by Anne Elk |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Lonesome EJ Date: 24 Oct 09 - 02:54 PM Dennis Moore, Tug! I am an excellent shot because I practice every day. Well, not actually every day, but four or five times a week at the very least. Well, not last weekend because I was quite engaged, but easily 7 out of ten days. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Tug the Cox Date: 24 Oct 09 - 03:45 PM OOPs, cheers, Lonesome. I gave him my baby to kiss.....and he bit it! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Ed T Date: 24 Oct 09 - 06:29 PM WINE EXPERT: A lot of people in this country pooh-pooh Australian table wines. This is a pity as many fine Australian wines appeal not only to the Australian palate but also to the cognoscenti of Great Britain. Black Stump Bordeaux is rightly praised as a peppermint flavoured Burgundy, whilst a good Sydney Syrup can rank with any of the world's best sugary wines. Château Blue, too, has won many prizes; not least for its taste, and its lingering afterburn. Old Smokey 1968 has been compared favourably to a Welsh claret, whilst the Australian Wino Society thoroughly recommends a 1970 Coq du Rod Laver, which, believe me, has a kick on it like a mule: eight bottles of this and you're really finished. At the opening of the Sydney Bridge Club, they were fishing them out of the main sewers every half an hour. Of the sparkling wines, the most famous is Perth Pink. This is a bottle with a message in, and the message is 'beware'. This is not a wine for drinking, this is a wine for laying down and avoiding. Another good fighting wine is Melbourne Old-and-Yellow, which is particularly heavy and should be used only for hand-to-hand combat. Quite the reverse is true of Château Chunder, which is an appellation contrôlée, specially grown for those keen on regurgitation; a fine wine which really opens up the sluices at both ends. Real emetic fans will also go for a Hobart Muddy, and a prize winning Cuivre Reserve Château Bottled Nuit San Wogga Wogga, which has a bouquet like an aborigine's armpit. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Lox Date: 24 Oct 09 - 07:59 PM WHAT DO YOU MEAN: "WHAT FLAVOUR IS IT"? IT'S A BLOODY ALBATROSS!! IT'S FUCKING SEABIRD FLAVOUR!! (((((( ALBATROSS!! )))))) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Tug the Cox Date: 25 Oct 09 - 12:15 PM I love spam! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: theman2 Date: 25 Oct 09 - 02:09 PM Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: theman2 Date: 25 Oct 09 - 02:10 PM "I think i will go for a walk! You aren't fooling anyone you know!" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Tug the Cox Date: 26 Oct 09 - 09:35 AM So what are the possibilities of ovine aviation? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Lonesome EJ Date: 26 Oct 09 - 07:12 PM "We had quite a lot to drink. And then some of the fellows started handing cheese around. Just out of curiosity, I tried a bit, and, well....that was that." "And what else did these 'fellows' do?" "Well, some of them started..dressing up as mice a bit." |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Tug the Cox Date: 26 Oct 09 - 08:33 PM And ......squeaking. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Ed T Date: 26 Oct 09 - 08:57 PM What a silly Bunt I am....the man who couldnt say the letter C |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Dave Hanson Date: 27 Oct 09 - 03:38 AM Well can you say the letter K ? Oh yes, khaki, kettle, Kipling, Kuwait, Kings Bollege Bambridge. Dave H |
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Subject: RE: BS: Monty python quotes From: Ed T Date: 27 Oct 09 - 07:07 AM I see, I see. Well let's return to your symphony. Ah, now then, did you write this symphony...in the shed? |
