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Lyr Req: Black velvet band PARODY

DigiTrad:
BLACK VELVET BAND
BLACK VELVET BAND (2)
BLACK VELVET BAND (NEW ZEALAND VERSION)
BLUE VELVET BAND (2)
THE BLUE VELVET BAND
THE BLUE VELVET BAND (3)


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Lyr Add: Black Velvet Band - 4 versions (2)


GUEST,Toenails john 13 Nov 04 - 02:44 PM
Brakn 13 Nov 04 - 02:54 PM
GUEST,Toenails john 13 Nov 04 - 03:06 PM
Leadfingers 13 Nov 04 - 08:34 PM
GUEST 24 Nov 04 - 05:44 PM
Bob Bolton 24 Nov 04 - 09:21 PM
GUEST,Paul Burke 25 Nov 04 - 07:23 AM
GUEST,Paul Burke not followed by enter 25 Nov 04 - 07:25 AM
Snuffy 25 Nov 04 - 08:59 AM
Dave Bryant 25 Nov 04 - 10:19 AM
ToulouseCruise 25 Nov 04 - 10:56 AM
GUEST,Toenails john 25 Nov 04 - 02:04 PM
The Fooles Troupe 25 Nov 04 - 08:37 PM
Bob Bolton 25 Nov 04 - 09:40 PM
GUEST 15 Apr 05 - 08:56 AM
GUEST 11 Sep 06 - 03:17 PM
Dave Hanson 12 Sep 06 - 02:08 AM
Valmai Goodyear 12 Sep 06 - 04:58 AM
GUEST,kevin 30 Jun 08 - 06:39 PM
GUEST,Peter E 21 Apr 09 - 03:52 PM
bodgie 21 Apr 09 - 06:17 PM
MMario 27 Sep 18 - 11:53 AM
GUEST,Gerry 27 Sep 18 - 07:57 PM
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Subject: Lyr Req: Black velvet band PARODY
From: GUEST,Toenails john
Date: 13 Nov 04 - 02:44 PM

I am looking for the words to a parody on the black velvet band, called, My Old Morris Van

The chourus goes,

Her headlamps hung out like black puddings
I thought she was queen of the land
She'd a bucket of spuds in her apron
And half a sows head in her hand.

It's about the shananagins you could get up to in Belfast with an old morris van. Have it on a recording we made of Pecker Dunne in a session one night, but the lyrics are lost in the noise of the background

any takers??


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Black velvet band PARODY
From: Brakn
Date: 13 Nov 04 - 02:54 PM

Is this it?


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Black velvet band PARODY
From: GUEST,Toenails john
Date: 13 Nov 04 - 03:06 PM

Not the exact one no, but definetly a variation on Peckers one that i have, Then again, peckers could easily be a variation on that one.
Anyone else come up with variations, post away, that version will do though.

thanks brakn


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Black velvet band PARODY
From: Leadfingers
Date: 13 Nov 04 - 08:34 PM

When i was working in 'The Robin Hood' in Hamilton , Bermuda , my mate and I used to change the last line of the chorus ! -
Her Boobies hung over her shoulder ,held up by a big navvies hand for example !


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Black velvet band PARODY
From: GUEST
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 05:44 PM

I thought the original must be a parody, since it starts:

"In a neat little town they call Belfast"

Mind


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Black velvet band PARODY
From: Bob Bolton
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 09:21 PM

G'day Guest,

Well ... versions starting "In a neat little town they call Belfast" are, in effect parodies ... or, at least adaptations as the original 19th century song, as printed in broadsides found all over the British Isles, which was set in Barking (suburb of London).

From information in various threads on Mudcat, I think all the "Belfast" and "Dublin" versions are 1960s Irish folk band adaptations of a collected version from Sam Larner of Winterton.

Regards,

Bob


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Black velvet band PARODY
From: GUEST,Paul Burke
Date: 25 Nov 04 - 07:23 AM


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Black velvet band PARODY
From: GUEST,Paul Burke not followed by enter
Date: 25 Nov 04 - 07:25 AM

Wrong button again.

"her knickers hung down by her ankles
She'd snapped her elastic band"

Try singing Albert and the Lion to the tune. Or better still, don't.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Black velvet band PARODY
From: Snuffy
Date: 25 Nov 04 - 08:59 AM

The Lion and Albert is best sung to the tune of My Bonny Lies Over The Ocean - with BVB all you need is the comic hand motions to accompany the chorus.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Black velvet band PARODY
From: Dave Bryant
Date: 25 Nov 04 - 10:19 AM

Bob - the London broadside versions which I've seen (and one of which I sing) are usually based in the Wapping/Ratcliffe area. The famous Ratcliffe Highway is now just called "The Highway".

I've heard a bawdy parody with the words:

Her tits they hung down to knee-caps
Held up by a big navvie's hand.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Black velvet band PARODY
From: ToulouseCruise
Date: 25 Nov 04 - 10:56 AM

With her legs wrapped over my shoulders....


err, nevermind


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Black velvet band PARODY
From: GUEST,Toenails john
Date: 25 Nov 04 - 02:04 PM

The scope is endless really isn't it?

In a neat little town they call Belfast
Apprentice to a trade I was bound,
Turning my hand to carpentry
In a workshop in the centre of town.
Now every day around lunchtime,
The boss man, old Johnny Moore,
Would disappear for an hour or so
To the guest house located next door.

He knew the proprietor for many's the year.
Mary Magee was her name;
But the nature and conduct of her business
Would bring Belfast town into shame.
She rents out her rooms by the hour,
And her customers' names she won't mention.
She gives bank holiday specials to navvys,
And discounts to those on the pension.

And her knockers hang down to her kneecaps,
A figure of beauty, it has to be said;
With flowing black hair down her lily-white back,
And not one single strand on her head.

One day whilst goin' home early,
Waitin' for me bus ride,
I had an hour or two that I could kill.
I took a deep breath and ventured inside.
"It's 50 quid for an hour,
But I'm not really sure that you ought."
How I wished to blow all me wages that night,
But the bastard had left me a bit short.

"I'm only a hard-up apprentice.
I've got 10 quid and not any more."
She said, "that's fine by me, my dear.
For that price, I'll show you my DOOR."
Well I left the place broken-hearted,
My face all down-turned and sour.
Now I'll never know what a man can do
In a guest house inside of an hour.


I have way, way, way to much time on my hands. This thread is heading song challenge way.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Black velvet band PARODY
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 25 Nov 04 - 08:37 PM

Don't stop NOW!

As the Actress said to the Bishop...


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Black velvet band PARODY
From: Bob Bolton
Date: 25 Nov 04 - 09:40 PM

G'day Dave Bryant,

Yes ... we're both right ... all the broadsheet versions, in the major British & Irish collections, seem to start (~):

    On a sloop ... bound for Barking

but the mendacious lady is encountered (~) cruising along the Ratcliff Highway. The point I was making was that the broadsheet publishers don't seem to have localised the town ... undoubtedly local singers did - but the "folk revival" versions weren't collected local variants, rather they were localised re-writes of the song as collected elsewhere - by bands seeking more repertoire.

I'm not word-perfect on the broadsheet lines ... my interest, in Australia, is in the locally collected versions - and definitely not the ones copied off import LPs in the '60s!

Regards,

Bob Bolton


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Black velvet band PARODY
From: GUEST
Date: 15 Apr 05 - 08:56 AM

I prefer the one I heard from a lush in a dublin pub:
"Her Eye shone like a dime
ye'd think she'd had pigeons for hands
an her hair looked like a boulder,
held on wit' a big rubber band."


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Black velvet band PARODY
From: GUEST
Date: 11 Sep 06 - 03:17 PM

Heard this one on an internet radio station. Don't remember who sang it and my lyrics may not be perfect, but here's the gist:



His eyes, they shone like emeralds

I thought him the queen of the land [shouted: And he was!]

and his hair it hung over his shoulder

all the way to his black leather pants.




Cheers!


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Black velvet band PARODY
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 12 Sep 06 - 02:08 AM

Hamish Imlach had one called ' The Black Velvet Gland '

eric


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Black velvet band PARODY
From: Valmai Goodyear
Date: 12 Sep 06 - 04:58 AM

This is one of the songs that comes out of the Great British Drunk just prior to the insertion of a steaming Vindaloo. It seems to have permeated the national consciousness.

In Lewes Bonfire circles there is a tendency to shout THREE FOOT LONG! immediately after the line 'Her neck it was just like the swan'.

Valmai (Lewes)


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Black velvet band PARODY
From: GUEST,kevin
Date: 30 Jun 08 - 06:39 PM

And then there's the parody Black Canvas Bag
"Her eyes were cloudy and milky
blah blah de blah de blah blah
With her head cut off at the shoulders
tied up in a black canvas bag


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Black velvet band PARODY
From: GUEST,Peter E
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 03:52 PM

Dear Sirs,

I refer to the following first vesre of an East London version of "Black Velevet Band"

One day, being out on a ramble, alone by myself I did stray,
I met with a young gay deceiver, while cruising in Ratcliffe Highway;
Her eyes were as black as a raven, I thought her the pride of the land,
Her hair, that did hang o'er her shoulders, was tied with a black velvet band.

I used to live in the Shadwell/Wapping area of London and would be very grateful if someone woulf direct me to a link that will show me the complete lyrics of this version.

Yours faithfully
Peter E


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Black velvet band PARODY
From: bodgie
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 06:17 PM

are readers aware that the original broadside contained a verse warning women not to 'tie up their hair in a black (or blue) velvet band ...as if to tie in their brains'.

Young girls if you wish to turn modest and strive a connection to gain,
Do not wear a band o'er your forehead as if to tie up your brain.
Some do prefer Victorian fashion, and some their braided so grand;
Myself I do think it much neater than a girl with a black velvet band.

I have just released a series of CDs of original broadsides including this one.

warren fahey


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Black velvet band PARODY
From: MMario
Date: 27 Sep 18 - 11:53 AM

Years ago (just about the time of this thread beginning, I think) I wrote a parody for a mother/daughter duo... chorus they sang together, and the first verse....

In a neat little shire they call Carver
Much pleasure and song have we found
And any an hour of sweet happiness
We've spent in that neat little town

(mother) 'Til one day good fortune befell me
And mischief took me by the hand
And I shocked all my friends and relations
Because of some black leather pants

(*His eyes they shone like diamonds
He looked like a lord of the land
And his hair hung over wide shoulders
As he walked by in black leather pants)

(mother) Well I was out strolling one evening
Not meaning to go very far
When I met with a handsome young devil
As he chugged down a beer at the bar

I watched him go out the courtyard
As my heart it began to dance
And the temperature seed to go soaring
As he walked by in black leather pants

(*chorus)

(daughter) Next morning I stood there waiting
At the doorstep for her to appear. I said
You never came home last night
And it caused me a great deal of fear.

(daughter) They say you were seen at the Boar's Head
And they tell me you danced every dance
And it seems that you left for the evening
With some guy wearing black leather pants

(*chorus)

(both) So come all ye sweet noble ladies
I'll have ye take warning from me
Whenever you're out on the liquor
Take care that you never are seen

(both) Many months have gone by since this happened
And the story belongs to the past
(mother) But no one will let me forget the night
I fell for those black leather pants!

chorus


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Black velvet band PARODY
From: GUEST,Gerry
Date: 27 Sep 18 - 07:57 PM

Colum Sands tells a joke about be asked to sing "the one about the girl with the hairy tongue". When he protests that he doesn't know any such song, the fan quotes the lines, "Her hairy tongue over her shoulder/Tied up with a black velvet band."


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