Giving music for Christmas

Subject: Giving music for Christmas
From: Jerry Rasmussen
Date: 20 Nov 04 - 09:45 PM

'Tis the season. Of Jingle Bell Rock, relentless product plugging, frazzled nerves and too often unrealized expectations. But, that's only part of the season, whether you celebrate Christ in Christmas, or just as a social event. This thread is not meant to exclude anyone, and it could just as easily be titled "Giving Music For Hannakuh" or "Giving music For Next Thursday." The two key words are "Giving" and "Music."

Now, because we are in the Holiday season, whether we like it or not,
most people might read this title and start to think about what CDs to give friends or family for Christmas.

This thread isn't about that, either.

Most of us Catters are musicians and we have been given the gift of creating music. Like all gifts, music needs to be nurtured, but I believe that music is indeed a gift. All you have to do is listen to someone earnestly singing off key, not realizing that they are, to be reminded that music is not simply will power. It is something deeper than that. And more precious.

When I talk about giving music, I mean giving of ourselves, through the music that we play. I know that there are many Catters in here who quietly go about bringing music to nursing homes, hospitals, homeless shelters and other places where people there are starved for human connection. They aren't interested in fantastic instrumental breaks between verses. They need to feel part of something bigger than the nurse and the person next to them dozing in a wheel chair.
Sometimes, just taking their hand in yours, looking them in the eye and asking how they are is all they need. But, almost everyone responds to music. In a way, it almost doesn't matter what the music is. If music soothes the savage beast, it also soothes the broken bodied and the broken hearted. And those who feel forgotten.

This year, my wife and I and some of the Messengers are going to try to set aside some time before Christmas to join Barbara and Frank Shaw of Shore Grass to bring some music, cheer and a generous serving of love to those who are in greatest need. My wife and I and friends will also be going to at least one nursing home on our own for the same purpose.

I know there are many other Catters who will be giving the gift of their music during this Holiday season. It doesn't have to be Christmas carols, or gospel... just a gift of yourself. I'd just like to encourage others to seek out the opportunity to share of yourself during this Holiday season. It will be the best gift you can give, and certainly the best you'll receive.

Jerry

Subject: RE: Giving music for Christmas
From: Mudlark
Date: 21 Nov 04 - 01:37 AM

One of the best Thanksgivings I had, after John died, was singing at a convalescent hospital, really a euphemism for rest home for the aged senile. Not really ready yet for any kind of celebration, and fearing a meal with friends would just point up the fact that John wasnt there, I decided to do something completely different...and was very glad I did. For one thing, I was amazed to find the parking lot empty when I got to the hospital. Foolishly, I guess, I expected it to be crammed with visitors. So the chance to break up the long day with a visit involving music was obviously welcome, to staff as well as patients. I was offered a glass of lemonade and a large chocolate chip cookie, and then I played for over an hour. As always, You Are My Sunshine got the biggest audience response, the one song that seems to stay when all else is gone. But I went through all the campfire favs, then played 20's and 30's songs, then a few folk songs. Finally, sung out, I went around and spoke with everyone, patted shoulders or hands and left. The thank you I got from the hospital manager was heartfelt, but I felt equal gratitude, to be able to do something meaningful was a great gift to me. And I will go again this Thanksgiving, even tho later on I'll be dining with family.

The gift of attention and appreciation from regular audiences of any size always seem like a gift to me, rather than the other way around. How nifty to be able to do something you love...and get applauded for it!

Subject: RE: Giving music for Christmas
From: AllisonA(Animaterra)
Date: 21 Nov 04 - 07:16 AM

Thanks for this thread, Jerry. This is part of an idea that's been germinating in me for some time- how to make live, acoustic music accessible to as many people as I can. My women's chorus sings every year for several events as a gift- to the local soup kitchen, for example, and often to local nursing homes and once to the hospital (but the corridors were too small to hold us all!).
I also want to get out there with my own voice and concertina more often.
An important thing to remember is that Christmas tends to be a iime when, if there is an inundation, it's most likely to happen. I want to start a tradition of giving music in the depths of winter- Jan/Feb/March/(and into April, around here)- "off" times when the girl scouts, etc. may not be around either.

Allison

Subject: RE: Giving music for Christmas
From: GUEST,gulchero
Date: 21 Nov 04 - 09:46 AM

You are absolutely correct in the statement that we get way more tham we give by playing to the floks in care centers. There is not a more grateful audience. As one of you said, even those with advanced dementia can still connect with the music and feel alive again. Many times I have played to those in a center somewhere and watched someone that appeared unable to speak or relate to anyone begin tapping a toe or a finger at the beat of a favorite old tune.

There is not much to look forward to in a care center, particularly to someone with no family or a family that can't be there. Our gift of music can brighten the lives of folks whose hopes and options are limmited.

Those who give in this way are better for it. Our worries, our cares fade away and our appreciation of life is enhanced. Those of you who do play for the less fortunate, Keep It Up! Those who have not played for this great audience, Give It a Try! You will be amazed at the gift you get.

gm

Subject: RE: Giving music for Christmas
From: Jerry Rasmussen
Date: 21 Nov 04 - 03:38 PM

In many cases you may be right, Animaterra.. there may be a heavier programming going on during the Holidays than during the dead months of the winter. My wife and I do a monthly program at a health care center, and there is a real desire to hear live music and share time with people who show that they care about you, whatever the season. If people do feel moved to offer music at a health care center, I wouldn't assume that they have heavy programming in December. Some do, but some don't. Or, it may be a small Christmas party for the residents hosted by the staff, which isn't significantly different than the Birthday parties most places do every month.

One thing you can be pretty sure of. Very few places have too much live music...

Jerry

Subject: RE: Giving music for Christmas
From: Polly Squeezebox
Date: 21 Nov 04 - 04:10 PM

Yes, it's good to give the gift of music, but not only to the aged and not only at Christmas. The band I play with regularly play for dances for people with learning difficulties - what a rewarding time that is for us - and I don't mean financially. Of course, you need an understanding of what they are capable of - and a caller with infinite patience and a gift for being able to communicate with these special people. We are very lucky to work with Dick Stanger as caller when doing these dances. Many English Catters will know him as the ex-director of Chippenham Folk Festival, but Dick also used to work at a centre for people with learning difficulties and so can get them dancing and is able to adjust the dances to what they are able to do. Yes there are those who have severe learning difficulties, and often other disabilities, who are unable to dance or even communicate in any recognisable way. One of the most special moments of my playing over many years with the band was when a young woman with severe learning difficulties left her chair and came to stand about a foot in front of me whilst I was playing. She reached out her hand and rested it gently on the top right hand side of the melodeon whilst I continued to play, looked straight into my face and smiled. I'm sure she was able to feel the vibration of the music as well as hear it, and her nursing aide told me that it was the most response she had shown to anything for years.

I would also remind folk musicians to let blind people feel the instruments that are being played in breaks between music. That way they can get a better understanding of how the music is produced. Don't worry about them handling the instruments, those very sensitive hands are used to the lightest touch if they read Braille, and will take great care.

We are the fortunate ones when we work with and for these special kinds of people.

Polly

Subject: RE: Giving music for Christmas
From: Megan L
Date: 21 Nov 04 - 04:49 PM

several years ago when Dauvitt and I were in charge of a badger sett (young St Andrews Ambulance first aiders 6 - 10 year olds) ok sometimes it was hard to tell the difference :) We used to take them to the local care home 2-3 times a year to do thier party pieces for the residents. There were some decent young musicians among them and they held together quite well as a choir, one girl was quite good highland dancer and someone would recite poetry.

It was a lovely time for all as the residents used to treat us to supper and we usually draged along a couple of willing parents who were musical to help out.

Subject: RE: Giving music for Christmas
From: Barbara Shaw
Date: 21 Nov 04 - 05:05 PM

Frank and I used to drop in several times a year to the nursing home on Cape Cod where his mother was living. She had Alzheimer's, and died this past June. This will be the first year in many that we won't be there to do songs for Christmas, or for that matter, songs for spring or fall or summer. The drive to the Cape will not likely happen, but we also do a few things locally whenever we can.

For us, it wouldn't be Thanksgiving or Christmas Day without bringing some music to the local soup kitchen. It's one of the things that make it feel like a holiday for us. We've been doing it for so many years that people know us now. Some faces are there year after year and others are new each year. By the time we've gone through an hour of lively songs and watched the silent, still crowd turn into a foot-tapping, smiling bunch, we're both higher than a kite and ready to face our own holiday at home, whatever it might be. This year, my son and his family from CA are coming for Thanksgiving, along with my other son from NY. I'm thrilled and blessed that they will all be here, but we're still going down to the soup kitchen to share some of our joy. They won't miss us for an hour, but the soup kitchen might.

Try it, you'll like it.

Subject: RE: Giving music for Christmas
From: Jerry Rasmussen
Date: 22 Nov 04 - 11:12 AM

These are all wonderful stories! Besides nursing homes, there are homeless shelters, and even individual homes. A woman who is a "Mother" of the church we go to lost her husband a couple of years ago and then without warning, went blind. The doctor's couldn't do anything about it, and as she is in her 90's and living at home, she lives a very restricted life now. She always loved to hear the Gospel Messengers, so we went and did a full concert just for her and her care giver, in her living room. It was a beautiful experience, and as the woman said when we asked if she was tired.. "I could just sit here and listen all day!"

Sometimes unusual situations encourage unusual responses.

Jerry

Subject: RE: Giving music for Christmas
From:
Date: 22 Nov 04 - 02:20 PM

Dear Jerry--

You DO come up with such good thread topics!

Last year and this, Reynaud and I played Christmas music with a couple of friends at a Baptist nursing home where the mother of one of the friends lives. We've played there 3 times in the year she's been there, and the residents appreciate it so much.

Mudlark--You Are My Sunshine is always a hit, even with folks who don't seem to remember how to talk. The Christmas carols also seem to resonate with these people too. And the people who have all their mental faculties intact sing and clap along.

In another direction, we also play several benefits every year. We played one for the Local United Network to Combat Hunger and we're playing one on 4 December in New London to benefit a local food bank and one on 18 December in Pomfret to benefit the Northeast CT food bank. We play for free, so the entire door goes to the agency. We're sort of transmuting music into food...

V