BS: Inner Beauty

Subject: BS: Inner Beauty
From: Jerry Rasmussen
Date: 06 Aug 05 - 07:46 AM

Eight years ago, I started going out with Ruth. My friend Joe, who sings bass with the Messengers was very excited when I told him that Ruth and I were going out together. The first words out of his mouth were "She's a beautiful woman, and she's good looking, too." That was one of the wisest statements I've ever heard in my life. And true. The beauty Joe was talking about was inner beauty. When you meet someone who has that inner beauty, you respond to it instinctively. I am honored to know several people who have that inner beauty. Some are "good looking, too" and some are not (at least by contemporary standards.) But, whatever their exterior appearance, inner beauty radiates outward and can transform very ordinary looking people into something beautiful.

There is a woman who works on the checkout line at the local Home Depot. I go out of my way to get in her line, even if it is longer.
She is heavy-set, black, and has a tooth missing that is very noticeable, because she has such a radiant smile. She is very beautiful, and I even enjoy watching her as she waits on customers in front of me. She makes you feel like you are special, and that she is really happy to see you... and then you realize that she makes everyone feel that way. To her, each person is special.

There is a woman who works on the checkout line at a local supermarket who is the same way. She is quite overweight and not what would be considered a "beauty", but there is an inner beauty that shines through her and warms everyone who she waits on. Again, she makes everyone feel like they are special.

On the other side, there are women I know who are "beautiful" on the outside whose face when in neutral looks set in stone, with a faint, permanent look of disapproval. No matter how attractive they may be on the outside, they are always alone. The beauty is truly only skin deep.

Men have (or don't have) inner beauty, too. (It's not inner handsome.) There are men who get jealous when they see a very ordinary looking man with a gorgeous woman how is obviously in love with them. They wonder how that can be. The woman is responding to inner beauty.

In the long run, inner beauty is not dependent upon exterior beauty, although it can transform a very ordinary exterior into something beautiful if the person has eyes to see it. There are people in here, who I feel are beautiful. I don't need to click on the photos to see what they look like. Photos don't capture inner beauty very well. The thread What Love Rally Is touches on the whole inner beauty issue, and this post could easily have been added to that thread. But, I thought it deserved one of its own.

So, what makes inner beauty? I can think of a dozen qualities. I'll just mention one, and then turn it over to all of you.

Humility.

After others have had a chance to express their feelings, I'll come back to humility.

Jerry

Subject: RE: BS: Inner Beauty
From: GUEST,daylia
Date: 06 Aug 05 - 09:56 AM

There are men who get jealous when they see a very ordinary looking man with a gorgeous woman how is obviously in love with them. They wonder how that can be. The woman is responding to inner beauty.

That's so sweet, Jerry! And yet, practical day-to-day experience shows that men rely most on this type of "inner beauty" to spark the flames of passion.

Good thing, too. It's the easiest form of "inner beauty" anyone could hope to manifest! The others seem to have these annoying prerequisites that can take FOREVER to cultivate - traits like humility, compassion, wisdom, patience, selflessness....

Subject: RE: BS: Inner Beauty
From: Jerry Rasmussen
Date: 06 Aug 05 - 10:10 AM

Men aren't the only ones who respond to the folding green to arose passion. :-) Nothing inherently wrong with folding green, any more than there is anything inherently wrong with exterior beauty. Eyes are made to see with. It's those who have eyes but cannot see below the surface who are truly blind.

One of my very favorite quotes is from The Little Prince by Antoine De St. Exupery. where the Little Prince is speaking to the fox:

"Goodbye, said the fox. "And now, here is my secret, a very simple secret: It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye."

Jerry

Subject: RE: BS: Inner Beauty
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 06 Aug 05 - 10:35 AM

Never was spoken a truer word Jerry, physical beauty is meaningless without a good personality.

eric

Subject: RE: BS: Inner Beauty
From: GUEST,Mrs Miggins
Date: 06 Aug 05 - 10:45 AM

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.............get it out with Optrex.

Subject: RE: BS: Inner Beauty
From: dianavan
Date: 06 Aug 05 - 01:43 PM

beauty is as beauty does

Subject: RE: BS: Inner Beauty
From: Le Scaramouche
Date: 06 Aug 05 - 01:54 PM

Quite so, Jerry. Inner beauty spills outward. Mind you, I preffer an interesting face with a good personality to just bland prettiness.

Subject: RE: BS: Inner Beauty
From: Amos
Date: 06 Aug 05 - 02:33 PM

Most beautifully writ, Mr. R.

Sure, humility is a key. I think that it comes, in turn, from integrity -- the certainty one has seen what one has seen, and has not seen what one has not seen, and the strength to say which is which. This is a very "soft" strength, in my view, not a muscular one, but the kind that can take 250 pounds of muscle and testosterone and train it to set the table!

But I think there is another piece even more important, related to those. The ability to radiate inner beauty is coupled with the ability to see the beautiful.

A

Subject: RE: BS: Inner Beauty
From: ranger1
Date: 06 Aug 05 - 10:22 PM

What you said, Amos. Also, I think inner beauty is coupled with inner peace. I have found that inner peace comes from knowing yourself and coming to terms with who you are, lumps, warts and all.

Subject: RE: BS: Inner Beauty
From: Jerry Rasmussen
Date: 07 Aug 05 - 09:47 AM

ranger1:

"knowing yourself and coming to terms with who you are, lumps, warts and all" is a good definition of humility. I don't know about the root of the word, but the words "humble" and "humiliate" seem leagues apart.
My Websters dictionary defines humble as "not proud, arrogant or assuming; modest." In the King James version of the bible, the term they use to describe someone who is arrogant and assuming as being "puffed up." Man, I love that term. I knows folks who are so puffed up that if you tied a string to their ankle you could float them in the Macy's Day parade. Not that we all aren't puffed up at times. Me included. The thing about humility is that it is as you described... an honest acceptance of who we are. Funny, but most people think of that as recognizing our "warts and all." And that's an important part of it. But, humility recognizes our strengths, too. Humility is a state where we can look honestly at ourselves and find that inner peace (which is essential to inner beauty), recognizing that our strengths are gifts to be nurtured (and not to get puffed up about) as well as our limitations. Fortunately, there are others whose gifts are in our areas of weakness and limitation. They are placed in our path to help us, as we may be placed in theirs to help them in areas where they are weak.

One of the humblest men I ever was blessed to meet was Mississippi John Hurt. He was without pretense. He certainly knew how wonderful his music was, and you could see what joy it gave him to entertain others. But, he seemed to have such a solid sense of who he was that he could be proud and modest at the same time.

Humility is not self-degradation, or downplaying our gifts. It's an internal honesty we all strive for. Some attain it, and they are a gift to everyone else.

Jerry

Subject: RE: BS: Inner Beauty
From: van lingle
Date: 07 Aug 05 - 10:59 AM

What did Fred Sanford say? "Beauty's only skin deep but ugly goes clean to the bone."
That aside, it's funny how the more you become aware of someone's inner beauty the more pleasing they become to the eye. Well, to mine,anyway.

Subject: RE: BS: Inner Beauty
From: michaelr
Date: 07 Aug 05 - 11:45 PM

Me, I'm an inner supermodel.

Seriously though, one should be careful with the humility thing. You let it show too much, and less humble people will walk all over you.

It's all about balance, and humility without self-confidence can be dangerous.

Cheers,
Michael

Subject: RE: BS: Inner Beauty
From: Jerry Rasmussen
Date: 08 Aug 05 - 08:15 AM

Good points, Michael. But then, I don't think that self-confidence and humility are incompatible. And at the center of humility is being realistic. Humility is not Nobby, the house elf in Harry Potter. That's groveling and self-deprecation. Humility is knowing and respecting who you are.

Jerry

Subject: RE: BS: Inner Beauty
From: KT
Date: 08 Aug 05 - 04:01 PM

Nice thread, Jerry. In fact, I saw the title and thought, Oh, good! this looks like it might be a Jerry Rasmussen thread!

This thread reminds me of a conversation I had recently with a seven year old. She was all dressed up for something special and I told her that she was beautiful. I also told her that she was wise because she knew a secret that some adults haven't figured out yet, ie, that it's okay to be beautiful on the outside but far more important to be beautiful on the inside. She nodded her comprehension and vowed with her wise old soul eyes to remember.

Some people just shine, like the lady you mentioned Jerry, in the checkout counter. You feel grateful and happy just to be in their presence. I think everyone's got it, though. It's just that some folks have forgotten who they are so they need good folks to recognize it in them and remind them.

KT

Subject: RE: BS: Inner Beauty
From: Clinton Hammond
Date: 08 Aug 05 - 04:05 PM

"what makes inner beauty?"

Outer ugly!

LOL

Subject: RE: BS: Inner Beauty
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 09 Aug 05 - 04:30 AM

It's not so much the awareness of inner beauty, it's having the perseverance to stick with the person until you find it. Everyone has it, it's just buried deeper in some than others....

LTS