BS: Dangerous World, for Canada

Subject: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: GUEST,rarelamb
Date: 20 Dec 05 - 10:43 AM

It has come to my attention that the people of Canada need to have their ears boxed until they smell the sulfur from hell, that is our dangerous world.

After reading several threads on this site, it is clear that we need to educate our neighbors to the north. So let us review the growing danger to Canada:

1. Drop Bears. If you want to ignore them then you live in peril of your own ignorance. I have been beating this drum for a while and PROVEN that they are a risk.

2. Your proximity to the north pole puts you at increased risk from Rudolph the Red Nosed Terrorist. You have been warned.

Rudolph's link to terrorism

3. You are not immune to the rampages of armies of Drunk Santa Armies

4. Anyone who has seen the recent Coke commercial with the polar bears and penguins would reasonably ask why would Polar Bears hang out with their 'food'. It's because the polar bears have found new food, man meat.

5. It is also well known that penguins are very militaristic. The only thing that 'marches' is an army. The reality is that they poses weapons of mass destruction.

Penguin Nukes

6. Canadian Outrages will only be tolerated for so long. If you continue to piss off all of your world neighbors, you can not expect for there not to be some sort of retaliation. Everyone has their limits!

7. Let me ask you this: What would you do if an army of evil snowment decided to attack?

The horror of Frosty

8. If you really want the best beer, you will have to goto war with Belgium.

Better beer than any Canadian beer

9. Did I mention dropbears?


So you can see that the world is a dangerous place. WAKE UP CANADA!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: gnu
Date: 20 Dec 05 - 10:56 AM

Moosehead won two gold medals IN Belgium this year. Penguins live at the opposite end of the earth from us, so let them march all they want. All of our Santas are drunks, just, nice Canuck drunks. Piss on the snowmen... just that simple. Rudolph was shot during buck season... tasty. Outrages? Outrages? WE DON"T HAVE OUTRAGES!!! Ya wanna make somethin of it EH? EH!!??

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: gnu
Date: 20 Dec 05 - 10:59 AM

Oh yeah... the bears. We don't need to drop them when we can charge $1500 a week for youse to come drop them for us. Of course, we never drop polar bears, we are keeping them for when the penguins get here.

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: Peace
Date: 20 Dec 05 - 11:03 AM

Spring is just around the corner in eight months. Relax.

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: GUEST,rarelamb
Date: 20 Dec 05 - 12:34 PM

"Moosehead won two gold medals IN Belgium this year. "

Hey take it easy pal. It's ok. I mean if you actually believe Canada makes good beer, well sure why not...No need to fly off the handle.

"Penguins live at the opposite end of the earth from us, so let them march all they want. "

I would direct you to the missiles that CAN hit Canada. I would alos point out that if the penguins already have the southern pole then it makes sense that they would want the North pole. I mean the North Pole would be more confortable than Hawaii.

"All of our Santas are drunks, just, nice Canuck drunks. "

That isn't the point. What if you are attacked by a bunch of non canadian santas?

"Piss on the snowmen... just that simple. "

How many Mackenzie brothers are there?


Rudolph was shot during buck season... tasty. "

Proof???

"Outrages? Outrages? WE DON"T HAVE OUTRAGES!!! Ya wanna make somethin of it EH? EH!!??"

Easy, I said you had good beer.

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: GUEST
Date: 20 Dec 05 - 01:20 PM

Go play in the traffic rarelamb

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Dec 05 - 01:33 PM

I think that all Canadians should be aware that the United States has been training selected Special Forces personnel to operate in Canada in the event of Canada being invaded by someone. We feel that it's the very least we can do to bring democracy to Canada.

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: gnu
Date: 20 Dec 05 - 01:35 PM

Alpine, made at Moosehead Breweries, in Saint John, New Brunswick, won Gold in New York this year, too. Damn straight Canada makes good beer. My Budweiser is brewed in Halifax, Nova Scotia.

"I would direct you to the missiles that CAN hit Canada." But, if they are coming from south of the US, they'll be knocked out of the sky by youse Yanks before they get to us. They look kinda like Canada Geese, so they ain't got much chance a gettin by the USAF (okay... that was a low blow, and in rather poor taste, but somtimes ya gotta push the edge).

"How many Mackenzie brothers are there?" Two, but they got one shitload a beer.

"Proof???" Ah, you want pancakes or spuds with your steak? Urp.

"What if you are attacked by a bunch of non canadian santas?" Obviously, you have no idea of how many hockey players we have.

"Easy, I said you had good beer." No, you didn't. I read what you said and you did not say what you said you said. You got somethin to say, say it. G'wan. Say it.

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: jeffp
Date: 20 Dec 05 - 01:55 PM

Damn straight Canada makes good beer. My Budweiser is brewed in Halifax, Nova Scotia.


The second statement does not prove the first.

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: Don(Wyziwyg)T
Date: 20 Dec 05 - 02:23 PM

Penguins are not Polar Bear food, and won't be unless Wallmart sees a profit in importing them from Antarctica, where they live, to the Arctic residence of all the Polar bears.

Don T.

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: GUEST,rarelamb
Date: 20 Dec 05 - 02:33 PM

"Penguins are not Polar Bear food, and won't be unless Wallmart sees a profit in importing them from Antarctica, where they live, to the Arctic residence of all the Polar bears."

Which makes the documented film evidence I mentioned before all the more critical.

You are going to deny until you're trapped in the belly of a penguin or polar bear unles you start to think straight.

Polar bear and Penguin conspiracy

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: Cluin
Date: 20 Dec 05 - 02:53 PM

4. Anyone who has seen the recent Coke commercial with the polar bears and penguins would reasonably ask why would Polar Bears hang out with their 'food'.

Anyone who has seen the recent Coke commercial with the polar bears and penguins would reasonably ask where are these polar bears from the Arctic meeting up with penguins from the Antarctic? Ice Age a-comin'?

Oh, that's right. The cola companies figure people watching are stupid; that's why they're trying to foist their poisonous "soft" drinks on us. (ever seen what Coke does to paint?)

All in good fun, eh? Suspending disbelief does not mean tightening the noose, swinging it around our heads and letting it fly into space.

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: GUEST,Big Bad Wolf
Date: 20 Dec 05 - 03:00 PM

I love rare lamb.

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: gnu
Date: 20 Dec 05 - 03:46 PM

Near as good as a nice steak off a Rudolf's ass.

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: GUEST,rarelamb
Date: 20 Dec 05 - 04:08 PM

Look, I like Canada and its wonderful people. That is why I am trying to warn you that you need to protect yourselves from this dangerous world.

I have provided IRREFUTABLE EVIDENCE that you are in danger. Buy at least ONE chopper or ONE year round ice breaker.

Canadians are not loved around the world. You have enemies. Be prepared.

"Go to hell Canada, go to hell!!!"

Your friends from the south.

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: jeffp
Date: 20 Dec 05 - 04:57 PM

ever seen what Coke does to paint?

Ever seen what stomach acid does to it?

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: Little Hawk
Date: 20 Dec 05 - 05:04 PM

No...

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: Peace
Date: 20 Dec 05 - 05:49 PM

"Look, I like Canada and its wonderful people."

We are twice blessed, I'm sure.

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: CarolC
Date: 20 Dec 05 - 07:02 PM

Watch out, rarelamb. If you keep flirting with the Canadians here, before too long, you might just find yourself married to one of them. That's what happened to me. It's all a part of their plot to take over the US.

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: gnu
Date: 20 Dec 05 - 07:29 PM

I'm single.

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: GUEST,Big Bad Wolf
Date: 20 Dec 05 - 08:13 PM

Not so fast Mr.gnu, I've got dibs on rarelamb and if you're not careful I do gnu too.

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: GUEST,Big Bad Beaver
Date: 20 Dec 05 - 11:32 PM

He's dam cute!

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: GUEST,Big Bad Evangelist
Date: 20 Dec 05 - 11:50 PM

Preverted canucks. They exhibit such disgusting behaviour.

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: gnu
Date: 21 Dec 05 - 06:43 AM

BBWolf... if you suck as good as you blow...

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Dec 05 - 09:15 AM

Sheila: Times have changed
Our kids are getting worse
They won't obey their parents
They just want to fart and curse!
Sharon: Should we blame the government?
Liane: Or blame society?
Dads: Or should we blame the images on TV?
Sheila: No, blame Canada
Everyone: Blame Canada
Sheila: With all their beady little eyes
And flappin' heads so full of lies
Everyone: Blame Canada
Blame Canada
Sheila: We need to form a full assault
Everyone: It's Canada's fault!
Sharon: Don't blame me
For my son Stan
He saw the darn cartoon
And now he's off to join the Klan!
Liane: And my boy Eric once
Had my picture on his shelf
But now when I see him he tells me to fuck myself!
Sheila: Well, blame Canada
Everyone: Blame Canada
Sheila: It seems that everything's gone wrong
Since Canada came along
Everyone: Blame Canada
Blame Canada
Copy Guy: They're not even a real country anyway
Ms. McCormick: My son could've been a doctor or a lawyer rich and true,
Instead he burned up like a piggy on the barbecue
Everyone: Should we blame the matches?
Should we blame the fire?
Or the doctors who allowed him to expire?
Sheila: Heck no!
Everyone: Blame Canada
Blame Canada
Sheila: With all their hockey hullabaloo
Liane: And that bitch Anne Murray too
Everyone: Blame Canada
Shame on Canada
For...
The smut we must stop
The trash we must bash
The Laughter and fun
Must all be undone
We must blame them and cause a fuss
Before somebody thinks of blaming uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuus

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: CarolC
Date: 21 Dec 05 - 10:12 AM

Looks like we scared him away. It's a dangerous world for USans.

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: Peace
Date: 21 Dec 05 - 10:23 AM

We can freeze ya ta death. Do NOT mess with Canada. Most Canadians are legally insane--well, except for Shatner and me--and they know where the thermostat is. Yer fren, Bucky.

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: MarkS
Date: 21 Dec 05 - 12:30 PM

Don't annoy the Canadians too much - I hear they have more Shatners up there and just need an excuse to send them south to us.

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: Peace
Date: 21 Dec 05 - 12:37 PM

Listen to MarkS. And be afraid. Be VERY AFRAID.

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Dec 05 - 12:45 PM

Good God! They're going to open that gate on that barbed-wire fence up in Alberta and there won't be ANYTHING to block the weather!!

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: GUEST,rarelamb
Date: 21 Dec 05 - 01:28 PM

And if that isn't enough to scare you into action then maybe chupacabras is.

A chupacabras was located
in Canada. There also seems to be a connection with UFOs. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chupacabra

"A famous appearance in the city of Varginha, Brazil, (see Varginha incident) is sometimes attributed to the chupacabras, the phenomenon is more frequently associate with extraterrestrials."

And we have many documented UFO sightings in Canada:
UFO sighting
UFO sighting
UFO sighting
"BRITISH COLUMBIA, CANADA

WHITE ROCK - Four major UFO sightings occurred in Surrey Corridor on Friday, Saturday and Sunday, May 21 to 23, 1999. Tom Zytaruk reports North Delta resident Graham Conway, president of UFO*BC, is quite impressed with the number of unexplained sightings. This is a fine collection of good eye witness stuff." A man reportedly ran into the Ocean Beach pub about 10:00 PM Friday, "stuttering like mad" that he'd seen a huge blue plasma ball cruising over Semiahmoo Bay. "He said it was monstrous," said UFO tracker Bill Oliver, of Guildford. "He was rattled big time." Whatever it was cast such a bright light it lit up the sea beneath and "apparently acted in an intelligent manner," said Conway.

Three South Surrey residents claim to have seen a huge boomerang-shaped object with eight lights on front, at about 10 PM. Shaking with fear, they watched it move "very, very slowly" for about eight seconds before it took off. About five minutes after that siting two persons were standing on White Rock pier when they claim to have seen a wedge-shaped object 'a flying triangle' traveling below the tree level. They watched it for about three or four minutes as it headed across the bay, away from White Rock. Then on Sunday, about 10:15 PM, Jen Pieschel and her boyfriend Kevin Pearce saw a wedge-shaped object flying over Highway 99, near the Crescent Road turnoff. They saw it had blue and red flashing lights, and then spotted an amber flash, like a flare, from a second craft. "We saw something weird," Pieschel said. Thanks to UFO*BC hotline, CAUS, and Surrey Now 5/25/99. "


UFO sighting

UFO sighting

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: Metchosin
Date: 21 Dec 05 - 01:55 PM

Canada, the home of the 60 acre spider web is not a place for arachnaphobes either.

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: Peace
Date: 21 Dec 05 - 03:40 PM

That should be a movie of some sort, Metchosin. It would rank up there with other classics like "The Blob" or "The Swamp Creature" (I don't know if The Swamp Creature was a movie, but if it wasn't it shoulda been).

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: GUEST,Obie
Date: 21 Dec 05 - 04:30 PM

Don't you know that Superman is a Canuck! Even Captain Kirk does not tangle with the man of steele!! With him on our side we have no fear! Merry Christmas to all from the great frozen north!
                         Obie

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: gnu
Date: 21 Dec 05 - 08:29 PM

Superman is a Canuck? Really? Sure you don't mean Stuperman?

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: GUEST,Obie
Date: 21 Dec 05 - 10:06 PM

Actually he is a Kryptonian but he was created by Joe Shuster from Toronto.

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous World, for Canada
From: GUEST,Bardford
Date: 21 Dec 05 - 10:36 PM

You can have you Super/Stuperman. The real Canadian superhero is Mr. Canoehead

Also, from this site,This site I discovered that Rocket Robin Hood (fire in his eyes, iron in his thighs), Beaver Boy, and Stallion Canuck are also standing by to defend the borders of Canada against bad-doers of non goodness.

"Taste gunnels, Evil Dr. Perm!"