Subject: BS: Wanker's Register From: The Shambles Date: 22 Dec 05 - 02:15 AM I see we have a Lurker's Register so why not a Wanker's Register for self-confessed wankers? I think that may have 'bashed the Bishop' myself once when I was younger - but I did not inhale................. |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: Big Al Whittle Date: 22 Dec 05 - 02:56 AM in fact why wait for confession, why not denouce publicly and hand out summary justice...... George Bush! |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: Dave Hanson Date: 22 Dec 05 - 04:34 AM It's only having sex with your best friend. eric |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: GUEST,Unquotable Date: 22 Dec 05 - 04:44 AM Probably Roger's only friend. |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: George Papavgeris Date: 22 Dec 05 - 05:13 AM Now, now, unfair and probably even untrue, GUEST,Unquotable. Roger offers a confession (rare event in itself) and you put him down for it! Though the concept of inhaling during the act is giving me some nightmarish images... I, of course, was always pure in thought and deed, and never abused myself, never made love to the widow with the five sons (any Greek-speakers will appreciate that this is a pun), never fought the one-eyed monster....Not. |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: Paco Rabanne Date: 22 Dec 05 - 05:30 AM It's best performed whilst wearing rabbit fur mittens. |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: George Papavgeris Date: 22 Dec 05 - 05:38 AM I remember that a schoolmate had a sock fetish. We didn't know until one day, I guess we would have been 14 or something like that, a bunch of us were talking idly and the subject of masturbation came up. Someone cracked the usual joke, "sex is good, but it doesn't beat wanking", and this friend pipes up "yes, with a nice sock to put on your hand!". You could have heard a pin drop. |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: GUEST Date: 22 Dec 05 - 11:09 AM "Rabbit fur mittens",don't palm me off with those.Does it make you go blinde,if so,can I do it till I need glasses? |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: TheBigPinkLad Date: 22 Dec 05 - 11:23 AM Names that don't appear on this register can be found on the liar's register next door. |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: GUEST,Mingulay at work Date: 22 Dec 05 - 11:45 AM Names that appear on neither register can be found in the obituary column. One should never lie about RSI, it can be fatal! |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: Bill D Date: 22 Dec 05 - 11:47 AM "Sex is like playing cards...if you've got a good hand, you don't need a partner" ...but I can't see the need for registration.......oh, wait! Perhaps Shambles wants suggestions on technique! big>☻ (I'll bet if they ban it in pubs, he'll have a campaign going in favor...*grin*) |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: Bee-dubya-ell Date: 22 Dec 05 - 11:53 AM This subject is a little too sticky for me. |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: mooman Date: 22 Dec 05 - 11:54 AM Now that "two in a bar" is banned that may be a possibility Bill. Peace moo |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: Bill D Date: 22 Dec 05 - 12:01 PM yep.."solo in a bar" might just be the next big debate! ☺ |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: David C. Carter Date: 22 Dec 05 - 12:05 PM Just found I'd suddenly become a "Guest",I posted at 11:09 AM.Forgot me glasses. |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: Big Al Whittle Date: 22 Dec 05 - 12:16 PM we have a confusion of terms here. the act of maturbation doesn't make a complete wanker....... |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: TheBigPinkLad Date: 22 Dec 05 - 12:21 PM Yah, you'll get confused if you overdo it, wld (so I'm told) |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: John MacKenzie Date: 22 Dec 05 - 12:34 PM All male respondants so far apparently. Of course I forgot, only men go to DIY stores. NOT Giok |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: TheBigPinkLad Date: 22 Dec 05 - 12:38 PM Giok, you need to check the 'migraine relief' register. ;o) |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: Bill D Date: 22 Dec 05 - 12:38 PM " the act of maturbation "...is that different from juvenilebation we used to attempt as kids? ☺ |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: Oaklet Date: 22 Dec 05 - 12:40 PM You'll never find me in a menage a un. Unless you look really hard. So there. Great thread, Roger. |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: TheBigPinkLad Date: 22 Dec 05 - 12:44 PM Speaking of which ... does this require an apostrophe? Rogers Hand |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: John MacKenzie Date: 22 Dec 05 - 12:49 PM This should be next to the 'Hand made gifts' thread! G ☺☺ |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: George Papavgeris Date: 22 Dec 05 - 01:34 PM "Rogers hand" needs no apostrophy if it is meant as a verb... |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: George Papavgeris Date: 22 Dec 05 - 01:35 PM Should have been "apostrophe" - apostrophy means something totally different! |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: John MacKenzie Date: 22 Dec 05 - 02:02 PM Malakia G ☺ ☺ |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: TheBigPinkLad Date: 22 Dec 05 - 02:03 PM Is it what you're awarded for the pithiest reply to a thread, George? ;o) |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: George Papavgeris Date: 22 Dec 05 - 02:29 PM "Malaka" (wanker) is both a term of abuse (sic) and endearment, the latter especially among male friends. It depends on context and who is talking to whom. So I feel very comfortable in calling Giok another such term of double meaning, as he knows what I mean: I am honoured, pousti Giok! :-) |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: gnu Date: 22 Dec 05 - 02:30 PM I spent a few nights with the Palm Sisters when I was a lad. Generally, men reach their sexual peak in their teens and women in their thirties. That's quite a fuckup if you ask me. |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: GUEST,Mrs. Robinson Date: 22 Dec 05 - 02:33 PM You can say that again gnu. |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: GUEST Date: 22 Dec 05 - 02:41 PM Roger will be the Wankers Register President no doubt. |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: GUEST Date: 22 Dec 05 - 02:48 PM There are only two kinds of liar; those who say they don't, and those who say they never did> |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: John MacKenzie Date: 22 Dec 05 - 02:53 PM Efkaristo poli,Giorgiou. G. |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: gnu Date: 22 Dec 05 - 02:57 PM Well, sometimes, ah, I, ah, use my left hand... feels like somebody else. |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: GUEST Date: 22 Dec 05 - 03:06 PM Sergeant Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band. |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: gnu Date: 22 Dec 05 - 03:08 PM Sergeant Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Hand. |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: GUEST Date: 22 Dec 05 - 03:11 PM The wit here is unending. |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: gnu Date: 22 Dec 05 - 03:14 PM Jaysus!!! At least I'm trying. Don't see you lending a hand at all. |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: John MacKenzie Date: 22 Dec 05 - 03:17 PM Love Oh Love Oh Calloused Love! G. ☻ |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: bobad Date: 22 Dec 05 - 04:25 PM Don't knock masturbation, it's sex with someone I love. Woody Allen Annie Hall |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: Shanghaiceltic Date: 22 Dec 05 - 06:48 PM Only did it until I had to wear glasses....! |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: mooman Date: 22 Dec 05 - 06:53 PM Lend a hand here! |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: GUEST Date: 22 Dec 05 - 06:54 PM Same crew all the time. |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: GUEST Date: 22 Dec 05 - 06:55 PM Yeah, that's what makes you feel so at home, isn't it? |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: Alaska Mike Date: 22 Dec 05 - 06:57 PM Father: "Stop that son, you'll go blind." Son: "Dad, I'm over here. |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: Lanfranc Date: 22 Dec 05 - 07:35 PM In my days in what is now referred to as the Financial Services Industry, it was generally considered that the collective noun for bankers was "a wunch of bankers". A collective noun for masturbators? A hand? A grip? A bishopric(k)? An old friend of mine always referred to multi-tracked recordings where most or all the instruments were played by one person as musical masturbation (his favourite example was Mike Oldfield's "Tubular Bells"). Pass me my old malaka cane, George, I'm sure he'll enjoy it! Alan |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: The Shambles Date: 22 Dec 05 - 08:15 PM I really don't know too much about this subject but I do wish you would all use bigger writing........... There are some interesting terms to describe the practice. My favourite is 'one-eyed piccolo playing'. Another one is GUEST. |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: GUEST,Joe_F Date: 22 Dec 05 - 09:08 PM Wanking is fine, but fucking you can actually meet people. --- Joe Fineman joe_f@verizon.net ||: What's _done_ we partly may compute, But know not what's _resisted_. :|| |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: GUEST Date: 22 Dec 05 - 09:54 PM Go and make a donation to the fertility clinic and you get $50 from the Wank Bank |
Subject: RE: BS: Wanker's Register From: GUEST,Cookieless Skivee Date: 22 Dec 05 - 10:05 PM Per comments above. Sgt. Peppers Lonely Club |