anti-school songs

Subject: anti-school songs
From: doryman
Date: 02 Mar 06 - 06:04 PM

My 8 yr old son Jesse asked me if I knew any anti-school songs other than his favorite "Glory glory halleluiah teacher hit me with a ruler..." I could only think of a couple of pop songs- The Wall, School's Out Forever, ... Anyhow, shouldn't there be like a great and ancient folkie tradition of such songs? Seems only natural. Anyone got a song(s) or (gulp) an opinion?

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: yrlancslad
Date: 02 Mar 06 - 06:27 PM

Two quickies come to mind, the Oldham Tinkers used to do one called, I think," Down at our School" and Ted Edwards has one "Cross Country Smoking"

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: GUEST,Marion
Date: 02 Mar 06 - 06:41 PM

On Rick Fielding's CD "Acoustic Workshop" there's "Off to School No More", which is a parody of the shanty "I'll Go Off to Sea No More."

link to CD

Marion

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: GUEST,Marion
Date: 02 Mar 06 - 06:44 PM

Let's try that again...

There's also:

Joy to the world! The school burned down
And all... the teach...ers died,
Except for the principal, he's standing on the flagpole,
And we won't let him down, and we won't let him down,
And we, and we won't let him down.

And

Row, row, row your boat, gently down the stream
Throw your teacher overboard, listen to her scream.

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: Alaska Mike
Date: 02 Mar 06 - 07:27 PM

This one is kind of depressing. I wrote it about the incessant bullying that seems to go on in many schools.

Frightened
by Mike Campbell 2005

I am frightened,
I don't want to go to school because they'll find me.
They will trip me in the hall, they will knock me to my knees,
And it will hurt and will make me feel weak.

I am so tired,
For I cannot sleep at night because they scare me,
So I lie awake and wonder what they'll do to me,
When they find me again tomorrow.

I mustn't tell,
If I tell on them they say that I'll be sorry,
And I know that they will find a way to beat me,
Even worse than they have beaten me before.

What can I do,
For I fear that this might just go on forever,
And a life that's lived in fear, a life that's lived in fear,
Is not worth living.

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: goodbar
Date: 02 Mar 06 - 08:36 PM

goddamn i hate school. the problem is that folk can't express the fury as well as punk music.

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: masato sakurai
Date: 02 Mar 06 - 09:03 PM

See Josepha Sherman & T.K.F. Weisskopf, Greasy Grimy Gopher Guts: The Subversive Folklore of Childhood (August House, 1995), pp. 103-125; Mary and Herbert Knapp, One Potato, Two Potato: The Folklore of American Children (Norton, 1976), pp. 173-179; and Simon J. Bronner, American Children's Folklore (August House, 1988), pp. 97-110.

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: GUEST,Gerry
Date: 02 Mar 06 - 10:33 PM

At P.S. 152 in Manhattan, we used to sing,

Give a yell, give a cheer, for the boys who drink the beer, in the cellars of 152
They are brave, they are bold, for the liquor they can hold, in the cellars of 152
For it's guzzle, guzzle, guzzle, as the beer goes down their muzzle,
Shout out your orders loud and clear - more beer!
And if [insert teacher's name here] finds us here, we'll say [ditto] have a beer
In the cellars of 152.

I believe the "real" words are, in the cellars of Murphy's saloon.

We also sang,

I'm Chiquita Banana, and I'm here to say, how to get rid of your teacher the easy way
Just put a banana peel on the floor, and watch your teacher fly out the door.

I'm sure there are more
1) in some older thread here,
2) in Joe's Got a Head Like a Ping-Pong Ball by Jon & Martha Pankake (all names approximate), and
3) in the DT database, possibly accessible by searching for "school"

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: NH Dave
Date: 02 Mar 06 - 10:58 PM

Many years ago befor PC was invented this song, Darkies Sunday School, was popular.

When you click on it you will see why it was eventually changed to,Come to our Sunday School.

Dave

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: GUEST,muscle of love
Date: 02 Mar 06 - 11:37 PM

"School's out" Alice Cooper



could always try to folkify it with a banjo and autoharp arrangement

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: GUEST
Date: 02 Mar 06 - 11:41 PM

How about the Brownsville Station, "Smokin' in the Boys room" That's one of my favorites.

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: Paul Burke
Date: 03 Mar 06 - 03:23 AM

Build a bonfire out of schoolbooks,
Put the teacher on the top,
Put the prefects in the middle
And we'll burn the bloody lot.

Come to our school, Come to our school,
For it is the very best,
There's a notice at the entrance
Saying "Welcome to the Rest".

Don't believe it, Don't believe it,
For it's all a pack of lies,
If it wasn't for the teachers
It would be a paradise.

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: GUEST
Date: 03 Mar 06 - 03:53 AM

From rapidly fading memory - not sure of spelling

Our schoolhouse is a fine schoolhouse
It's the best schoolhouse in Glasgae,
The only thing wrong with our schoolhouse
Is the baldy heided master.
He gaes tae the pub on Saturday night,
He gaes tae the kirk on Sunday,
Tae pray tae the lord tae gi' him the strength
Tea murder the weans on Monday.

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: Grab
Date: 03 Mar 06 - 01:30 PM

The old ones are the best...

"On top of old Smoky, all covered with snow
I shot my old teacher with arrow and bow

I shot her with pleasure, I shot her with pride
No-one could miss her, she's 40 feet wide

I went to her funeral, I stood by the grave
Some people threw flowers, but I threw grenades"

Actually my school experience was rather more like Alaska Mike's. I have to say that at that point you're not usually thinking about song lyrics - surviving the next day is a big enough challenge. If Jesse's mainly wanting songs about not liking teachers, I suspect he's probably not doing too badly.

Graham.

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: LadyJean
Date: 03 Mar 06 - 11:14 PM

Ta Ra Ra Boom De Ay
We have no school today
Our Teacher passed away.
She died of tooth decay.
They threw her in a bog.
The fished swam away.
And when they took her out.
She smelled like saurkraut.

From the Halls of the principal's office
To the shores of the PTA
We will fight our teacher's battles,
with spit balls and with clay.
First to fight for right and freedom and to keep our desks a mess.
We are proud to claim the title of the teachers' greatest pests.

Hi Ho! Hi Ho! it's off to school we go.
The water tastes like turpentine.
Our teacher looks like Frankenstein.

Look for "Greasy Grimey Gopher Guts" by Josepha Sherman. It's pretty good.

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: Jeanie
Date: 04 Mar 06 - 04:25 AM

These two come from the musical play "Three Cheers for Mrs. Butler !", originally produced at the Polka Theatre for Children, featuring the poems and characters created by Allan Ahlberg in his books "Heard it in the Playground" and "Please Mrs. Butler." The songs also appear in "The Mrs. Butler Song Book."

These two are just a flavour of it. There are plenty more (e.g. about lining up to have your head searched for nits; not being picked for the school team; having to go out to play in the freezing cold while the teachers escape to the warm staffroom).

THE GRUMPY TEACHER
What shall we do with the grumpy teacher ?(x 3)
Early in the morning ?

Hang her on a hook behind the classroom door,
Tie her up and leave her in the PE store,
Make her be with Derek Drew for ever more,
Early in the morning.

Please, Miss, we're only joking,
Don't mean to be provoking,
How come your ears are smoking ?
Early in the morning.

Tickle her toes with a hairy creature,
Leave her in the jungle where the ants can reach her,
Bring her back alive to be a classroom teacher !
Early in the morning.

.....And, from the other side of the fence.....

THE MRS. BUTLER BLUES
I've got the
Teach-them-in-the-morning-
Playground duty-
Teach-them-in-the-afternoon-blues.
My head's like a drum;
My feet, cold and sore.
I'm feeling so glum,
Can't take any more.
Can't take any more.
I've got the
Teach-them-in-the-morning-
Playground-duty-
Teach-them-in-the-afternoon-blues.

I've got the
Please-Miss-Tracey's-eating-
Where's-the-hamster?-
Miss-I've-broke-my-ruler-blues.
My hair's full of chalk.
There's paint upon my dress.
It hurts when I talk,
My handbag's a mess
My handbag's a mess.
I've got the
Please-Miss-Tracey's-eating-
Where's-the-hamster?-
Miss-I've-broke-my-ruler-blues.

I've got the
Teach-them-till-I'm-weary-
Parents'-evening-
Don't-get-home-till-midnight-blues.
I know it's a job
That has to be done,
But I'd rather rob
A bank with a gun !
If you give me the gun.
I've got the
Teach-them-till-I'm-weary-
Parents'-evening-
Won't-get-home-till-midnight-blues.

I've got the teach-them-till-I'm-weary-
Hmmmm!
How'd you like to be in my shoes ?

------------------------

For anyone who is interested, the script, song score and backing CD are published by "Dramatic Lines", and the song book is available separately.

I've just started rehearsing this with a cast of 25 eleven year olds - great fun.

- jeanie

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: GUEST
Date: 03 Nov 06 - 07:06 AM

These are some that were popular when I was in gradeschool:

(to the tune of Joy to the World)
Joy to the world, the teacher's dead
We bar-be-cued her head!
What happened to the body?
We flushed it down the potty!
And round and round it goes,
And round and round it goes
Forever and ever around it goes!

(To the tune of heigh ho, heigh ho it's off to work we go)
Heigh ho, heigh ho, it's off to school we go!
With hand grenades and bloody blades, heigh ho, heigh ho, heigh ho
Heigh ho, heigh ho, I bit the teacher's toe.
She bit me back that dirty rat, Heigh ho, heigh ho!

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: GUEST,Richie
Date: 03 Nov 06 - 07:19 AM

I like this one:

School by Nirvana

Won't you believe it
It's just my luck

No recess
No recess
No recess

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: oldhippie
Date: 03 Nov 06 - 08:26 AM

"What Have You Learned In School Today" - Tom Paxton

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: GUEST,your mom
Date: 05 Jan 07 - 08:24 AM

yeah cashews are good

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 05 Jan 07 - 08:43 AM

Pink Floyd...'We don't need no education!'

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: JeremyC
Date: 05 Jan 07 - 09:05 AM

I have two I learned in grade school:

Mine eyes have seen the glory of the burning of the school
We have tortured every teacher who has ever lived to rule
We have shot the secretary and we've hung the principal
The school is burning down

Glory glory halleluiah
Teacher hit me with a ruler
I hid behind the door with a loaded .44
The school is burning down

I KNOW there are more verses, but I don't remember them.

and (this was posted, but I have more/different verses)

On top of old smokey
All covered in blood
I shot my poor teacher
with a .44 slug

I shot her for pleasure
I shot her for fear
I shot her for drinking
My Budweiser beer

I went to her funeral
I went to her grave
Some people threw flowers
But I threw grenades

I looked in her coffin
She wasn't quite dead
So I took a machete
And cut off her head

They took me to prison
Put me in a cell
So I grabbed a bazooka
And blew them to hell

I probably first heard these in 4th grade or so, maybe 3rd.

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: JeremyC
Date: 05 Jan 07 - 09:12 AM

Oh, and I just remembered I have more of "Row, Row, Row Your Boat."

Row, Row, Row your boat
Gently down the stream
Throw the teacher overboard
Listen to her scream

(then, to a different tune--I don't know why, but I've never heard the two apart)

Five days later, floating down the Delaware
Chewing on her underwear, doesn't have another pair
Ten days later, eaten by a polar bear
Wonder why the polar bear died.

That last bit is to the tune of a Burl Ives song I can't remember the title to. Something about "I knew a man who had a horse."

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 05 Jan 07 - 10:31 AM

Kids would be expelled and/or sent to alternative schools for singing any of these. Administrators have no sense of humor or fair play in this day and age. "Zero tolerance."

SRS

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: fat B****rd
Date: 05 Jan 07 - 03:54 PM

Ian Dury "Jack Shit George"
Gary US Bonds "School Is Out"
Chuck Berry "School Days"

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: GUEST
Date: 05 Jan 07 - 04:41 PM

School's out, school's out,
The teacher let the fools out:
No more pencils, no more books,
No more teachers dirty looks.

Stephen R.

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: fumblefingers
Date: 05 Jan 07 - 07:44 PM

Oh Lord above
Look down with love,
On us poor sinful scholars;

We hired a fool
To teach this school,
And paid him thirty dollars.

---Will Rogers biography

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: Andy Jackson
Date: 05 Jan 07 - 07:55 PM

Then there was of course:
"All school din dins come from pig bins...Out of town."

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: Joe_F
Date: 05 Jan 07 - 08:50 PM

TTTO Stars & Stripes Forever:

Three cheers for --- Junior High.
It's the best junior high in ----.
Our colors are brown, brown, and brown.
It's the best junior high in town.

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: Adrianel
Date: 05 Jan 07 - 09:15 PM

"We gotta get out of this place" - the Animals (1964).

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: GUEST,Susie J.
Date: 11 Aug 07 - 04:37 PM

no more teachers no more books;
no more teachers dirty looks.
when that teacher rings that bell
drop those BOOKS and run like hell.

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: SharonA
Date: 12 Aug 07 - 12:29 AM

A more subtle example is Tom Lehrer's "New Math", wherein he pokes fun at one of the foibles of his own profession (math teacher!).

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: Penny S.
Date: 12 Aug 07 - 03:42 PM

Miskin Man, where did you get the school din-dins one from? I remember being taught it in the late fifties by someone in Folkestone who had learned it from a neighbour at a Secondary School in Park Farm Road (maroon uniform) who claimed that was where it was composed.

As

Say what you will, school dinners make you ill,
And Davy Crockett died of shepherd's pie,
All school din-dins come from pig bins,
Why, O why?

We used to see the pigbins collected! We tried to extend the verses, but failed.

At a different school, we composed...

We'll make a bonfire of St Stephens
And we'll burn our cares away,
Stack it up with all our homework,
And keep it burning all the night and all the day.
We'll make a guy fawkes of Miss _ _,
And Miss _ _ _ likewise.....

Can't remember how we ended it. Names obscured to protect - well, one of the two was strict but a good educator.

Penny

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: Lizabee
Date: 13 Aug 07 - 06:05 AM

We break up, we break up, we dont care if school blows up,
The'll be no more English, no more French, no more sitting on the old school bench.
If the teacher interfears, hang her up and box her ears
If that does not do the trick, dinamite will do it quick.
Teacher teacher on the chair, I can see your underwear.
Is it black or is it white, ohh my god it's dinamite.
______________________________________________

School dinners, school dinners
Concreate chips, concreate chips
Semalina pudding semalina pudding
I feel sick, Bathroom quick
ohh too late done it on the plate.
_______________________________________________

learnt both of these at 'first school' where we had neither french nor school dinners, but hey.

-Lizabee

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: Azizi
Date: 22 Jul 08 - 03:02 AM

A guest poster's commented on another Mudcat thread that school curriculum were "whitewashed, pureed to a pablum-like consistency, suitable for spoon-feeding" . That comment caused me to consider yhr possibility that rebelling against such pureed education could have been {and could still be] one reason for "ant-school songs".

Here's the link to my post about this topic in the "Origins: Got a Mule & Her Name is Sal/Erie Canal?" thread:

thread.cfm?threadid=112909&messages=8#2394802

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: Acorn4
Date: 22 Jul 08 - 04:09 AM

I think these days, a lot of anti-school songs might be from the teachers point of view. I often do this parody to the Pink Floyd classic:-

Kick in the Proverbials

We don't need no education,
We don't need no self control
There's really nothing you can teach us,
Cos we already know it all.

Hey, kids,
Leave those teachers alone
Leave those teachers alone
All in all it's just another
Kick in the b***s

Forms, initiatives and targets,
Inspectors never satisfied,
Monitored, assessed, evaluated,
Graded, jaded, crucified

Hey, kids,
Leave those teachers alone...

They're all headed for the burnout,
Hollow eyed, no life no fun,
No sense of humour allowed in the staffroom,
Po faced daleks everyone

Hey, kids,
Leave those teachers alone..

They can speak but we won't listen,
Fart and belch and answer back,
Attention span of a daddy longlegs,
Just give us Nintendo and American clack.

Hey, kids,
Leave those teachers alone..

You can't confiscate our mobiles,
We got our rights, you can't do nowt,
Tell us off and we will sue you,
Or get our dads to sort you out.

Hey, kids,
Leave those teachers alone..

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: Colin Randall
Date: 22 Jul 08 - 04:25 AM

Azizi, an occasional visitor to Mudcat, has lots of examples of songs and rhymes, including variations of some of those in this thread, at this site


http://www.cocojams.com/

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: banjoman
Date: 22 Jul 08 - 06:15 AM

Heres one I used to sing in the late forties
One more day and we will be
Out of the gates of misery
No more english no more french
No more sittin' on a hard wooden bench
If the teacher we should pass
Knock her down and kick her a!!

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: Acorn4
Date: 22 Jul 08 - 08:05 AM

One more day of school.
One more day of horror,
One more day of the dirty old dump,
WE're breaking up tomorrow!

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: GUEST,loop loop
Date: 22 Jul 08 - 07:25 PM

the teachers aren't fun
the teachers need to run
the teachers need to run befor i shoot them with a gun!

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: GUEST,Jonny Sunshine
Date: 23 Jul 08 - 06:30 AM

Surprised no-one's mentioned "School" by Supertramp.


OK, I confess, I'm a closet Supertramp fan ;-)

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: GUEST,annamulluvr
Date: 27 Jul 08 - 09:43 PM

okay I have an anti school song in a way I made it up during a map test that I finished


goes to row your boat

burn burn burn the school
watch the fire's glow
laughing and crying while teachers are frying
as the whole school goes

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: Suffet
Date: 27 Jul 08 - 10:05 PM

Oh, the schools we got today ain't worth a cent,
But they still make sure that every child's sent.
If you don't send 'em every day,
You got a heavy fine to pay.
Tell me, how can a poor man stand such times and live?

From How Can a Poor Man Stand Such Times and Live?
by Blind Alfred Reed

--- Steve

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: GUEST,Baronsmirnoff
Date: 28 Jul 08 - 03:00 PM

Say what you will, school dinners make you ill,
And Davy Crockett died of shepherd's pie,
All school din-dins come from pig bins,
Why, O why?

Last line was
Out of Town not Why, O why
In the version I knew at the school in Folkestone

Say what you will, school dinners make you ill,
And Davy Crockett died of shepherd's pie,
All school din-dins come from pig bins,
Out of Town

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: georgeward
Date: 28 Jul 08 - 04:31 PM

Hark! The heraald angels shout,
"Three more days, and we'll be out!"

And an older generation began guest's above as:

School's out! Schools out!
Teacher let the *mules* out !

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: Herga Kitty
Date: 29 Jul 08 - 04:36 PM

Following on the original "teacher hit me with a ruler", of course there's Matt McGinn's Rap tap tap:

Chorus
Rap, tap, tap, upon yer finger,
Rap, tap, tap, upon yer palm,
Rap, tap, tap, upon yer hand,
And I'll leave you with a blister like a Belfast ham.

Before I ever took to teaching I was a fairly decent chap,
Then they gave me fifty weans and a lovely length o' leather strap.

'Och!' says I, 'I'll never use it, weans can all respond to talk,'
I told them that, then turned aroond and a boy let fly a cake of chalk.

The boy that threw that chalk,' says I 'He'll never grow tae be a man,
He's far too feart tae show himself.' But he did, and he threw another one.

To strap a boy's an awfy business, every one's a mother's son,
Take the straps frae a' the teachers - issue everyone a gun.

Kitty

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: Suffet
Date: 31 Jul 08 - 05:02 PM

Greetings:

I wrote this back when it got so bad that the City of New York had to station police officers in the schools -- and that was to keep the teachers from smacking each other!

COPS IN THE CLASSROOM
Music: Walking Down Canal Street (traditional)
Lyrics: Stephen L. Suffet © 1971

One teacher screams, "Scab bastard!"
The other, "Racist fool!"
Cops in the classroom,
A typical day at school!

A typical day at school,
A typical day at school,
Cops in the classroom,
A typical day at school!

Now I know the law's the law,
But this I must protest,
When I went in an exit door,
They placed me under arrest.

They placed me under arrest,
They placed me under arrest,
When I went in an exit door,
They placed me under arrest.

I took a test the other day,
I did not pass or fail,
When they caught me with a crib sheet,
They hauled my ass to jail.

They hauled my ass to jail,
They hauled my ass to jail,
When they caught me with a crib sheet,
They hauled my ass to jail.

Now I know the law's the law,
But this is most unfair,
Smoking in the bathroom,
Will get you the electric chair.

Will get you the electric chair.
Will get you the electric chair,
Smoking in the bathroom,
Will get you the electric chair.

My solution is quite simple,
Of this I have no doubt,
Put all the cops in classrooms,
But let the students out!

But let the students out,
But let the students out,
Put all the cops in classrooms,
But let the students out!


Enjoy!

--- Steve

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: GUEST,katiesorfleet
Date: 27 Jul 09 - 12:18 PM

any one know the what should we do with an angry teacher on a monday morning? i learnt it in year 6 in my old primary and no one knows it any more.

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: Tug the Cox
Date: 27 Jul 09 - 08:11 PM

Will someone please set this to music.


Chaos ruled OK in the classroom
as bravely the teacher walked in
the nooligans ignored him
his voice was lost in the din

"The theme for today is violence
and homework will be set
I'm going to teach you a lesson
one that you'll never forget"

He picked on a boy who was shouting
and throttled him then and there
then garrotted the girl behind him
(the one with grotty hair)

Then sword in hand he hacked his way
between the chattering rows
"First come, first severed" he declared
"fingers, feet or toes"

He threw the sword at a latecomer
it struck with deadly aim
then pulling out a shotgun
he continued with his game

The first blast cleared the backrow
(where those who skive hang out)
they collapsed like rubber dinghies
when the plug's pulled out

"Please may I leave the room sir?"
a trembling vandal enquired
"Of course you may" said teacher
put the gun to his temple and fired

The Head popped a head round the doorway
to see why a din was being made
nodded understandingly
then tossed in a grenade

And when the ammo was well spent
with blood on every chair
Silence shuffled forward
with its hands up in the air

The teacher surveyed the carnage
the dying and the dead
He waggled a finger severely
"Now let that be a lesson" he said

Roger McGough

Subject: RE: anti-school songs
From: GUEST,Rukia
Date: 10 Nov 09 - 09:40 PM

This is one from my school, we made it up near Christmastime if that wasn't clear.

[To the tune of "O Holy Night"]

O Sunday Night, the school is brightly burning...
It is the night that we burned down our school.
Long lay our class, reports and essays writing...
Till we appeared, and set all rooms aflame!
The shrill alarms,
And all the teachers screaming,
As yonder loom
The strong and mighty flames.
Fall... on your knees...
O hear... the sirens wailing...
O school, be-gone...
O school, we hate you so...
Our school... is gone...
Ashes, forever gone.