Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards

Subject: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: Brass Monkey
Date: 26 Mar 06 - 02:07 PM

Can anyone add anymore lyrics for this? It's an alltime favourite of mine. It goes more or less like this...

I'll sing you a song that won't take long
All coppers are bastards
I'll sing you another just like the other
All coppers are bastards

If no one knows, how about we make up some verses?
Where does it come from anyway? It must have some story attached.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: Andy Jackson
Date: 26 Mar 06 - 02:26 PM

I remember it as :

"over the wall we go
all coppers are 'nanas"

not Bastards in the published version as it certainly would not have got any airplay.

Mike Sarn or Joe Brown come to mind

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 26 Mar 06 - 02:28 PM

football?

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: Nigel Parsons
Date: 26 Mar 06 - 02:30 PM

I'll sing you a song and it won't take long;
All coppers are con-stables
I'll sing you another as good as the other;
All coppers are con-stables.


The break in the second and fourth lines was always exaggerated, and it should be noted that the 'o' in constables is pronounced as some people pronounce the 'o' in Monmouth or Coventry

Cheers

Nigel

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: GUEST,labougie
Date: 26 Mar 06 - 03:02 PM

Two different songs here - "I'll sing you a song and it won't take long - all coppers are bastards" is cockney trad and is just those two lines. The other two have been added later, but they dilute the effect.

This one:

Over the wall we go
All coppers are nanas
Over the wall we go
Leave him a note saying "Wish you was here"
I know the best ways to break out of here
I helped a young laddie called Ivan
Over the wall last night
Then he climbed back and he grabbed me tight
He uttered some words that I can't say to you
Cause he remembered that he was a screw

Over the wall we go
All coppers are nanas
Over the wall we go
Leave him a note wishing "Happy New Year"

My name is Henry
Some say I'm thick
I've spent half me life in and out of nick
Me mum sends me presents to keep me in style
Soggy old cakes and hundreds of files
God sussed all them files
I'm a clever young man
Now I'm just stupid with manicured hands

Over the wall we go
All coppers are nanas
Over the wall we go
Nobody's left and the screws are in tears

spoken
"Double 3, 427" "Here sir"
"Double 3, 428" "Here sir"
"Double 3, 429, Double 3, 429, where is he?"
"He went out for a cup of tea at the local football match sir"
"Oh.... well he might have invited me"

Over the wall we go
All coppers are nanas
Over the wall we go
Nobody's left and the screws are in tears

We tried digging tunnels but gave up the ghost
Just past the Kensington Yards at the most
Our limbs was aching, we felt pretty pooped
Our clothes they was tatty, our hallows did droop
We crawled back to safety, our hearts filled with gloom
Cause we'd dug ourselves through to the smallest room

Over the wall we go
All coppers are nanas
Over the wall we go
Leave him a note wishing "Happy New Year"

spoken
[knock knock knock]
"Hello, who is it?"
"Double 3, 429, guv"
"Oh, hang on a minute...
   Hello sonny Jim
   Been wondering where you were
   Did you have a nice Christmas?"

was a xmas hit in 1966 after a more than usual number of gaol-breaks that year, and was performed by "Oscar" and written by David Bowie.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: MartinRyan
Date: 26 Mar 06 - 03:49 PM

Me? I thought the Coppers had their ancestry well attested, and were wonderful singers to boot...

Regards

p.s. OF COURSE, IF YOU MEANT lower case ......

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: Snuffy
Date: 26 Mar 06 - 04:42 PM

I'll sing you a song that won't take long
All coppers are bastards

I'll sing you another just like the other
All coppers are bastards

Third verse, same as the first
All coppers are bastards

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: NH Dave
Date: 26 Mar 06 - 05:49 PM

The way I originallly hear this one (from a Kiwi) was;

I'll sing you a song that's not very long,
All Poms are bastards.

I'll sing you another, just like the other,
You Yanks can't play cricket.

Dave

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: Leadfingers
Date: 26 Mar 06 - 05:51 PM

Got seven days Jankers in 1963 'cos someone else was singing this , and we got the blame ! HQ RAF Germany when I was an ever so 'umble SAC !!!

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: Big Al Whittle
Date: 26 Mar 06 - 06:34 PM

not about the Copper family then?
thought someone was being controversial for a minute

a protest song from the family next door perhaps

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: NH Dave
Date: 26 Mar 06 - 08:08 PM

'Fingers, some commanders just DON'T have a sense of humor.

    I was visiting Changi back in the good(?) old days, and we started the piss-up at the NAAFI. All when well until we started playing Rumble, and the previously friendly NAFFI Lady turned right unfriendly, and told us, not asked,but told us, to leave. Oh well, there's loads of bars on civvy street near Changi.

    Later on I saw a Royal Army Corps of Transport, Major, hammer his Private diver for "Theft by Using", of a couple of ounces of petrol because after driving the Major home, he made an unauthorized side trip to see his bird! This Major, perfectly civil to us, was an absolute bastard towards his men.

Dave
(Wee Dai)

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: GUEST,JohnB
Date: 26 Mar 06 - 09:18 PM

Snuffy got it right. That's the version I remember. Except maybe
I'll sing you some more it's the same as before" was in there too.
JohnB who appears to be cookieless

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: GUEST,Fossil in NZ
Date: 27 Mar 06 - 04:46 AM

I'll sing you a song and it won't take long
All coppers are bastards

Soooo........


If you want to know the time.....
ASK A BASTARD!

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: Brass Monkey
Date: 27 Mar 06 - 08:53 AM

Thanks for the lyrics and the info about Bowie.
I once had a cockney mate who got nicked after singing this (the 'all coppers are bastards' version) while he was cycling home on Christmas Eve. He was thrown in the cell over night and his parents had to come and collect him the next day! I guess they just proved the song true.

Has anyone else had any responses like this from singing this song?

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: Shields Folk
Date: 27 Mar 06 - 09:31 AM

Leazes End Newcastle circa 1973:

I'll sing you a song and it won't take long
All coppers are Handsome,Handsome Handsome
All coppers are Handsome BASTARDS!!!

..thats how I remember it?

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: GUEST,Aussie bastard
Date: 31 Mar 13 - 10:35 AM

I had great fun with this song when I worked in a 2nd hand furniture store in Shepherds Bush way back in the early seventies.The foreman was a cockney and a real prat. I started by humming the tune and over a few days had everyone in the workforce joining in. Its a catchy little tune OK. Then I added the words "I'll sing you a song" and humming the rest.My last payday was a nice quiet sunny day. The boss's wife, another Aussie. was humming along. The Scots truck driver joined in and soon we had a chorus going, including the cockney prat of a foreman with everyone singing and humming and whistling along. Then my Yarpi labourer mate and I sang the whole verse;
"I'll sing you a song and it wont take long.
All Pommies are bastards."
The response from the foreman was memorable.
Best practical joke I've ever played!

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: Jim McLean
Date: 31 Mar 13 - 11:59 AM

There was a Glasgow story when a policeman heard a child shouting "all coppers are bastards" decided to show him the police station and all the modern forensics they had to solve crime. After the tour the child was asked what did he think now. "all coppers are clever bastards" was the reply.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: Gurney
Date: 01 Apr 13 - 02:42 AM

Someone used to introduce this song by saying that singing it would result in two charges being laid.
One of insulting behaviour, one of contravening the Official Secrets Act.

Can't remember who.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: GUEST
Date: 10 Nov 13 - 09:58 PM

I'll sing you a song and it wont take long
All pommies are bastards
I'll sing it again and again and again
All pommies are bastards
I wish I was in England
I do, I do,
I'd go down to Trafalgar Square, and
say to old Lord Nelson
Get stuffed, get stuffed you one eyed pommie bastard

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: GUEST,.gargoyle
Date: 10 Nov 13 - 10:26 PM

How about a TUNE?

Parody most welcome.

Sincerely,
Gargoyle


They have invaded the palace....but must they steal our horse-hair bows too?

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: GUEST
Date: 11 Nov 13 - 09:08 PM

The song reminds me of sitting in the Lorelei (beatnik-favoured coffeebar in Brighton) one time in the early 60s when one of the Blue Meanies came in and everyone started humming the tune. Then when he went to leave (this was shortly after a major police bribery case in town), someone said, "Yeah, no doubt about it, Brighton's got the best police force money can buy."

"'Oo sed that?"

Jon Bartlett

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: mayomick
Date: 12 Nov 13 - 05:32 AM

I remember a rocker/greaser living nearby in the sixties who had ACAB written in big silver studs on the back of his leather jacket- that was in Tottenham in London. He was what they used to call back then a "bus stop cowboy" - somebody who had all the greasers' gear - the boots , the greased back hair and jacket - except for the motorbike. The police picked him up one evening wearing the jacket at a bus stop outside the local greasers' caff , held him in a cell overnight and brought him to court next morning. He may just about possibly have got away with telling the magistrate that he bought the jacket second hand not knowing what the letters stood for . Instead he came out with some convoluted story about buying it second-hand thinking that ACAB stood for "All Canadians are Bums". The fact that the beak didn't believe him for one minute showed how well known the rhyme was back then

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: Keith A of Hertford
Date: 12 Nov 13 - 05:39 AM

Does "over the wall we go" date from the train robbers break out?

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: mayomick
Date: 03 Aug 15 - 03:25 PM

With the references to "Ivan", it's more likely to have been about Russian spy George Blake who escaped around that time from Wormwood Scrubs , Keith . Ably assisted by Irishman , Sean Bourke, I'm sure you'll be pleased to note lol!

Asked about his motives for turning against old Blighty , Blake said that it had been his experience in the Korean War
" It made me feel ashamed of belonging to these overpowering, technically superior countries fighting against what seemed to me defenceless people. I felt I was on the wrong side ."

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: Vic Smith
Date: 03 Aug 15 - 04:52 PM

MartinRyan wrote
"Me? I thought the Coppers had their ancestry well attested, and were wonderful singers to boot...

Regards

p.s. OF COURSE, IF YOU MEANT lower case ......"

The problem with that, of course, is that at one time Bob was both a copper and a Copper.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: GUEST,Jon Dudley
Date: 04 Aug 15 - 04:52 AM

P.C.Bobby Copper indeed!

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: Vic Smith
Date: 04 Aug 15 - 05:42 AM

P.C.Bobby Copper indeed! 

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: GUEST,Russell in Bangkok
Date: 23 Dec 17 - 10:25 AM

I'll sing you a song that won't take long
All Pommies are bastards
I'll sing you again the same refrain
All pommies are bastards
I wish I were in England, I do, I do
I'd walk up to Trafalgar Square and say to old Lord Nelson:
Get stuffed, get stuffed, you poor old Pommie bastard
Get stuffed, get stuffed you poor old Pommie bastard
Rule Brittania, Britain rules the waves
Three Chinese crackers up your arsehole
Bang, bang, bang.

This is an old Australian drinking song.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: GUEST,Ian
Date: 03 Aug 18 - 11:28 AM

Written by David Bowie and sung by Paul Nicholas as Oscar

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: GUEST
Date: 30 Sep 19 - 05:44 AM

Remember that from my days at RAF Halton. Every body hated the Acting Cpl Snoops. Except Slim Turner, who used to read "A book at bedtime".
A gentleman police man!!

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: All Coppers are bastards
From: GUEST,sticky
Date: 04 Apr 24 - 04:20 PM

"I'll sing you a song, and it won't take long -
All coppers are bastards!"

I remember hearing this at school in the early '60s. Not being a football fan ever, I assumed it was heard as a chant by other boys when they went to watch their teams play.
Not sure about the cockney connection though, as this was in West Yorkshire.

Another one from those times, which I'm certain was a football chant, was sung to the tune of Camptown Races, and went:

Who's that copper with the big hat on?
Dixon! Dixon!
Who's that copper with the big hat on?
Dixon of Dock Green
On the beat all day, and on the wife all night
Who's that copper with the big hat on?
Dixon of Dock Green.