off-color gospel song - where's it from?

Subject: Lyr Add: HAND OF THE ALMIGHTY (John R Butler)
From: DADGBE
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 01:00 PM

Hi Friends,

First of all, If you are offended by 'naughty' words or satire of gospel music, you'll be more comfortable if you exit this thread immediately.

For those of you who are left, someone sent me an mp3 file of a funny bluegrass gospel parody with no name, group or any information attached. If any of you know anything about it, I'm interested. Also, I'd be glad to email the mp3 to any interested folks. Just send me a private message with your contact info.

The lyrics are:


HAND OF THE ALMIGHTY
(John R Butler)

Oh sinner, do not stray from the straight and narrow way,
For the Lord is surely watching what you do.
If you approach the devil's den, turn around, don't enter in,
Lest the hand of the almighty fall on you.

He'll fuck you up (he'll fuck you up), yes, God will fuck you up.
If you dare to disobey his stern command.
He'll fuck you up (he'll fuck you up), Don't you know he'll fuck you up.
So you better do some prayin' while you can.

Long ago, a man named Lot had a wife he thought was hot,
But she could not stop her black and sinful ways.
You know, it was her own damned fault when God turned that bitch to salt.
That's the way He used to work back in those days.

He fucked 'em up (he fucked 'em up). He really fucked 'em up.
When the people went and turned their backs on him,
He can fuck you up (he'll fuck you up). No shit, He'll fuck you up,
Just like He fucked the people up back then.

I used to have a friend named Ray who walked that evil way,
He cursed and drank and broke his neighbor's fence,
You know, Ray was full' aware, that some sheep were over there,
And he knew them in the biblical sense.

God fucked him up (He fucked him up). He went and fucked Ray up,
Went and paid him back for all his wicked sins,
He fucked him up (He fucked him up). Fucked that boy completely up.
Now he's married to a Presbyterian.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DIK0xIZbim8

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: Joe Offer
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 01:11 PM

Hey, I really like it - but I guess I'd better not sing it in church....

DADGBE actually called me to ask my advice on whether he should post this. I said that of course he should post it. So, if anybody objects to the posting of this song, blame me.

But anyhow, does anybody know anything about thi song?

-Joe Offer-
DADGBE, can you e-mail me an MP3?

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: DADGBE
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 01:14 PM

That it all depends on your church.

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: Jeri
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 01:28 PM

Joe goes to that church that has ninja nuns weilding nun(haha)chucks made of rulers.

I first thought I first thought 'Austin Lounge Lizards', but I don't think they would have recorded it on purpose. I then thought 'South Park' but I don't think so. It might be from a comedian or some movie. I swear I've heard it though, and anything of this genre I've heard can probably be blamed on Woodchuck's Revenge.

So Bigchuck or Midchuck might know.

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: jeffp
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 01:32 PM

I don't know who did it, but it's hysterical.

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: wysiwyg
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 01:34 PM

Joe, I HAVE to hear that sound file. You have my email address!

~Susan

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: Joe Offer
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 01:41 PM

If you Google for "stray from the straight and narrow way," you'll find that it's a very common phrase. I found one or two songs that use the phrase, but not that follow this pattern - it MUST be a parody of a standard, though.
Hey, would it be a bad thing for me to reveal that DADGBE is married to a preacher's kid??
-Joe-

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: Bill D
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 02:09 PM

It 'feels' like a pretty recent thing. I'd be quite surprised if it were 20 years old.

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: DADGBE
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 02:10 PM

This just in from the knowledgeable Mr. John Mehlberg - the sound file cam be found on this web site. They call it "God Will Fuck You Up" but supply no other information nor any way to contact the site.

At least you can all get your own copy of the song.

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: DADGBE
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 02:12 PM

It feels recent to me also, Bill. That's why I'm hoping that we can find somebody who knows about it.

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: Bat Goddess
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 02:16 PM

Just this morning I received an MP3 of this from a friend -- and figured I'd better get the words! He suggested that he at first thought ;-) it might be a Unitarian-Universalist hymn.

He got it from www.nuclearflatworms.org

I think I have to learn it although I can think of a couple venues I might not be able to sing it in. (Although for one of those venues, I really need to learn "What Key Does The Lord Sing In?" when things get a bit too cloying.)

Jeez, I'm the sister and sister-in-law of preachers (and, believe it or not, I'm a former Sunday school teacher).

Linn

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: Q (Frank Staplin)
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 02:35 PM

I'm sure there are more like this great song.
Many years ago, N. L. White termed songs of this type 'upstart crows.' The ones in the literature are mostly humorous and brief and probably are a poor sampling.

If you want to go to Heaven
I'll tell you what to do;
Just grease all over in Brunswick stew;
The devil will grab at you and miss his man,
Then you'll slip right over into the promised land.

Chorus
Oh, mourner, you shall be free.
When the good Lord sets you free.

Collectedin 1915-1916, NC, in N. L. White, 1928, "American Negro Folk-Songs," Chapter 3, no. 9.

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: wysiwyg
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 02:38 PM

The tune sounds like a pastiche of a couple of other well-known bluegrass/oldtime gospel songs. Mainly, "Leave it There," widely recorded and generally attributed to Albert Tindley. Even Willie Nelson has sung it (the original, not the parody!), on Garrison Keillor's Prairie Home Companion radio program. The lyric, though, is completely unrelated.

The other tune this song leans on will come to me eventually.....

~Susan

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: wysiwyg
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 04:25 PM

Hardi laughed so hard he could net hear the second verse. He wants to know if we can do it Saturday night at the service.

~S~

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: DADGBE
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 06:09 PM

Here's a link to another site from which you can down load the song. Still no background info, though

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: Bob the Postman
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 09:37 PM

When I heard it I thought "Brown's Ferry Four". It has the flavour of several of their recordings, especially "The Lord Is Watching Over Me".

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: dick greenhaus
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 09:52 PM

"I am Jesus' little sunbeam
And a fine fuckin' sunbeam am I"

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: John M.
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 10:56 PM

Joe & others,

Sorry, I don't really have much to add. I have done extensive google searches and have been unable to find the lyrics or variants posted anywhere. I strongly suspect that it is a modern parody of a gospel hymn that has "God will lift you up" as part of the chorus...

Inside the mp3 I have found it is track #3 so it is probably from a CD.

I will post up a preview of the song with lyrics on immortalia.com. Hopefully someone will come along and answer your questions about the song.

Yours,

John Mehlberg
~
My website: www.immortalia.com

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: LilyFestre
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 11:23 PM

I'll double my pledge for the year if he sings it for Saturday night service....I'll triple it if he sings it at the fashion show wearing the same get-up he wore last year....ROFLMAO

Michelle

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: LadyJean
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 11:41 PM

My sweet old silver haired mother used to sing:

Sister Lucy she had a low necked dress.
Sister Lucy, she had a low necked dress.
Sister Lucy had a low necked dress, it was much too low I must confess
There's no hiding place down there!

There's no hiding place down there Hallelujah
There's no hiding place down there praise the lord
She ran to the rock to hide her face and the rock cried out no hiding place
There's no hiding place down there.

It isn't as good as God Fucked him up. But it's not bad.

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: Flash Company
Date: 31 Mar 06 - 03:33 AM

Scans a bit like 'My Oklahoma Home'.....

It blowed away, it blowed away,
Oh my Oklahoma home it blowed away....

But then strays off to somewhere else. Never heard this one before, but I like it!

FC

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: Bob the Postman
Date: 31 Mar 06 - 10:08 AM

Subject: ADD: He'll Take You In
From: Bob the Postman
Date: 31 Mar 06 - 10:10 AM

How about this song?

He'll Take You In

 

HE'LL TAKE YOU IN

Let not your heart be troubled for He will take you in
His invitation stand forever more
He's right there where you let Him to take you by the hand
And lead you to that everlasting shore

   He'll take you in He'll take you in and give you shelter from the storm
   He'll take you in He'll take you in and there your mortal life transform
   How can you be so down and out you should jump right up and shout
   He'll take you in He'll take you in He'll take you in

Let not your soul be weary for He will strengthen you
Even in the weakest times you'll find
Him reaching out his arms to lift you up again
You know He'll take you in every time

You'll be walking on the water with your feet on hallowed ground
If you have the faith to follow in His will
You'll be one with the Spirit the Father and the Son
He'll deliver you sanctified and sealed


Bill Monroe: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jLR9Xbi6jX0

IIIrd Tyme Out: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lnt3Fw0CjpU

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: DADGBE
Date: 31 Mar 06 - 02:25 PM

Thanks for that song link, Bob. The rhythmic structure is exactly the same. 'He'll Take You In' wins my vote for the parody source material.

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: Windsinger
Date: 31 Mar 06 - 03:53 PM

DADGBE, that song is a scream. :)

(And I know at least one church where you could get away with it. Recently played a gig for one o' them Flying Spaghetti Monster er, "all-faith" congregations where they actually have a sense of humor.)

Slán,

~Fionn

www.geocities.com/children_of_lir

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: frogprince
Date: 31 Mar 06 - 04:30 PM

This is sort of an admission, not a complaint. I come from a pretty conservative (might as well say fundamentalist) background. A part of me still started to go "Oh, gracious me" when I saw that lyric; just a momentary reaction. Then I saw Susan acknowledge her own, and Hardi's, reactions. Now, I don't mean I'm offended or "opsot" with them at all; but old conditioning dies hard, and it just makes my head spin a little to think of a "nice pastor" and his "nice wife" being able to laugh freely (and admit it freely) at somthing our puritan forebears would have killed someone for.
   (But the "spin" feels kinda good).

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: wysiwyg
Date: 31 Mar 06 - 04:51 PM

Welcome to the reality of the pastorate, frogprince. If you want a REAL snapshot of The Life, ride in the hearse with the padre and the funeral director..... we'se jes' human beans.

~Susan

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: frogprince
Date: 31 Mar 06 - 05:29 PM

Then again, it was a Lutheran pastor who taught a number of us students the difference between a farmer with epilepsy picking corn and a prostitute with diarria.

The farmer shucks between fits...

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: wysiwyg
Date: 31 Mar 06 - 06:20 PM

... and in the hearse, rest asured I'm not talking about jokes about the departed-- other stuff, to break the tension.

~S~

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: TonyK
Date: 01 Apr 06 - 05:49 PM

The melody reminds me of Grandpa Jones' version of 'Great Will Be the Coming of Our Lord'. Great parody. Really says it in plain English.

I also like Woody Guthrie's 'There'll Be No Church Tonight' as recently recorded by his grandaughter and her husband, and The Clamtones' very irreverent 'All Your Sins Are Forgiven (Now Let Me Down)' from a few decades ago.

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: Charley Noble
Date: 01 Apr 06 - 08:03 PM

This is a new one to me, and it looks like it's got legs!

Charley Ignoble

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: DADGBE
Date: 02 Apr 06 - 03:32 PM

Well, Charlie, I hope so but the song's legs can hold a candle to its cheek.

Still no background info, I see. Curiouser and curiouser...

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: GUEST,J.S.Brown
Date: 03 Apr 06 - 02:50 PM

I heard this song last night while listening to the InfidelGuy's radio feed. WinAMp was displaying the following: "Winch - Hell fuck you up"

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: Steve-o
Date: 04 Apr 06 - 12:19 PM

The MP3 has really zipped across the net- all my music friends have heard it within about 3 days. For those of us who love to play and sing Bluegrass Gospel, this is a priceless parody. It is sung straight ahead, with no "wink-wink" junk- absolutely wonderful. We may never discover who the group singing is, though.

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: TheBigPinkLad
Date: 04 Apr 06 - 02:25 PM

If I were a believer, repetition of that song would constitute my vision of hell.

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: GUEST,tranzeve
Date: 05 Apr 06 - 08:49 PM

I would like to request an MP3 of this song, but I don't know how to send you a private message with my email address. Reply to

[e-mail]

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: Jeri
Date: 05 Apr 06 - 09:00 PM

Dear 'hotchick1921', see this message, above

The rest of y'all, beware of people trolling for e-mail addresses for spam lists.

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: GUEST,Jose
Date: 09 Apr 06 - 03:41 AM

Hehe I just got this song earlier today from my friends while we were playing World of Warcraft. That's how widespread it is. I love it so much. :) But yeah I wish I could find the name of this group.

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: DADGBE
Date: 09 Apr 06 - 06:28 PM

Hi Tranzeve,

Watch for it in your e-mail.

Best regards,
DADGBE

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: GUEST,Mandolirium
Date: 10 Apr 06 - 12:38 AM

For what its worth: I recently received this song in an email (with a title of GodWill.mp3) from a quite knowledgeable friend who attributes the recording to Jay Ungar, of Ashokan Farewell fame. A brief Google search didn't reveal a handy correlation between the song and Ungar, but then it probably wouldn't be the kind of thing he'd try to openly advertise on the internet.

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: GUEST,DeHypnotist
Date: 11 Apr 06 - 02:43 PM

Not only is it somewhat off color, but singing "Let Me Down" got Jeffrey Frederick and the Clamtones summarily escorted out of the state of Alabama by the State Troopers after they sang it onstage. Great song. "Jesus, Jesus, don't you ever listen to what I tell you?...." "You're my good daddy, and you helped me turn that water into wine... and I like that," "All your sins are forgiven, now let me down..." One version is currently in print, on "Jeffrey Frederick Band, Live at the Icehouse" and a reissue of "Spiders in the Moonlight" is in the works with the studio version.

Another treasure trove of the Jeffrey Frederick's version of gospel can be found on "Unfinished Business," an abbreviated set of tracks laid down shortly before he died, such as a very literal "Jesus on the Mainline," with meshes with a few other gospel-styled a capella tracks like "Hot Spoon On The Table" and "Bullshittin' Me."

Both are available from Frederick Productions (www.jeffreyfrederick.com).

Oh, although they are probably playing it straight, the Asylum Street Spankers have been doing gospel shows and are recording an all gospel album. These are the truly religious, god-afearin folks who in any one show can segue from "Everybody's fucking but me" to "Winning the War On Drugs" to "Ma-na-ma-ha" to "New Jazz Fiddle" to a doo-wop version of "Got My Mojo Workin' and "My Favorite Record" (with "Rotten Cocksucker's Ball" somewhere in the middle).

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 11 Apr 06 - 07:01 PM

http://www.nuclearflatworms.org/Temporary/god.will.do.this.mp3

The page you are looking for has been shot.


It was caught cattle rustlin', and it got what it deserved. It weren't nothin' but a low-down, dirty yellow dog of a web page, and now it's a lesson to other web pages that think they're above the law.

If you've reached this page, it means that either a) you've typed in the wrong URL address into your browser, or b) you've followed an outdated or incorrect link from another page. If it's the latter, see the owner of the originating web page about getting the link fixed.

Another possibility is that you're a cattle rustler yourself, and that you were waitin' here to meet the web page and reap the rewards of your nefarious doin's.

If so, I have just four words for you.

Zygote, meticulous, auroch, and desalinate.

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: GUEST,Cosmo'sMom
Date: 12 Apr 06 - 04:19 AM

I have no idea where it's from or who's singing it, but I remember the tune by thinking of Delta Dawn......

Why is my dog whining?

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: GUEST
Date: 14 Apr 06 - 04:26 AM

I would also like to request an MP3 of this song. Reply to [e-mail]


Thank you in advance ;)

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From:
Date: 24 Apr 06 - 06:47 PM

sounds like the soggy bottom group from that movie not 2 fur back in time. a real stand out actor he is ... that george guy ...I'd love to hear more

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: GUEST,Guest
Date: 25 Apr 06 - 08:00 AM

Don't forget those other great songs:

Plastic Jesus
Drop Kick Me Jesus Through the Goal Post of Life
Vatican Caskets
On a Hill Far Away Stood an Old Chevrolet
Whole Lot More of Jesus and a Lot Less Rock and Roll

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: GUEST,Guest
Date: 25 Apr 06 - 08:07 AM

Tom Lear's "Vatican Rag"

Go to church down on your knees
Fiddle with your rosaries
Bow Your head and shoe respect
then genuflect genuflect genuflect genuflect
Make a cross on your abdomen
when in Rome do as a Roman
Ave Maria gee its good to see ya'
Doing the Vatican Rag

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: John M.
Date: 12 May 06 - 03:14 PM

Hello,

I have found the author & singing of the song "God Will Fuck You Up".  The song is actually titled "The Hand of the Almighty" and is found on the Surprise! cd by John R. Butler.

See here for scans of the CD cover and CD:
 

        http://www.immortalia.com/html/sounds/CDs/john-r-butler/surprise/the-hand-of-the-almighty.htm

 

• John R. Butler
  • Surprise! 
    • Hyphenated Name  Time: 3:32
    • Holiday Play  Time: 2:13
    • The Gulf Coast of Florida  Time: 2:43
    • The Hand of the Almighty [aka God Will Fuck You Up]  Time: 1:41
    • She Came on to Me  Time: 3:19
    • Ball and Chain  Time: 4:37
    • Crack  Time: 3:43
    • Televangelist  Time: 2:19
    • Voice of the People  Time: 1:51
    • Yodel in Reverse  Time: 3:00

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: GUEST,I've seen the light!
Date: 03 Oct 06 - 02:17 PM

I hadn't been to curious about this until I got your note...   Then my obsessive nature kicked in... after several layer of Google search, here is what I came up with....

The artist's name is John R. Butler.

The song is called "Hand of the Almighty."

You can find the CD at: http://cdbaby.com/cd/johnrbutler

Glad to spread the joy and love.

Subject: RE: off-color gospel song - where's it from?
From: Bill D
Date: 03 Oct 06 - 04:14 PM

you mean, like John Mehlberg says in the post RIGHT ABOVE?