Lyr Add: Handy Man Blues (Stompin' Tom Connors)

Subject: Lyr Add: HANDY MAN BLUES (Stompin' Tom Connors)
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 09 Apr 06 - 03:17 PM

We ought to collect songs on this theme. Maybe Menards, Home Depot, or Lowe's will sponsor an album someday. Here are the ones I can think of:

HANDYMAN II
TALKING HOME IMPROVEMENT
MY HANDY MAN - also here
MY HANDY MAN AIN'T HANDY NO MORE
I'M A HANDY MAN TO HAVE AROUND

and then there's this "new" one I heard today:

HANDY MAN BLUES
Stompin' Tom Connors

I got the I-don't-know-how-to-fix-the-damn-thing blues.
I'm a handy man to have around when you're drinkin' booze.
I can't mend my broken heart with a hammer, nails, and screws.
I'm a handyman with the I-don't-know-how-to-fix-the-damn-thing blues.

You're just gonna have to come back to mend my broken heart,
'Cause ev'ry castle I ever built was a dream that fell apart.

I got the I-don't-know-how-to-fix-the-damn-thing blues.
I'm a handy man to make dreams that don't come true.
All I have is a broken heart and a tool set I can't use,
Like a handyman with the I-don't-know-how-to-fix-the-damn-thing blues.

I used to be the ambitious kind to keep things in repair,
But ever since you said goodbye, I guess I lost my flair.

Got the I-don't-know-how-to-fix-the-damn-thing blues.
I'm a handy man to make dreams that don't come true.
All I have is a broken heart and a tool set I can't use.
I'm a handyman with the I-don't-know-how-to-fix-the-damn-thing blues.

I got the I-don't-know-how-to-fix-the-damn-thing blues.
I'm a handy man to have around when you're drinkin' booze.
I can't mend my broken heart with a hammer, nails, and screws.
I'm a handyman with the I-don't-know-how-to-fix-the-damn-thing blues.
I'm a handyman with the I-don't-know-how-to-fix-the-damn-thing blues.

[Sung by Stompin' Tom Connors on "K.I.C. Along with Stompin' Tom," EMI Records 89451; and "Stompin' Tom at the Gumboot Cloggeroo," EMI 92978.

[Here's Stompin' Tom's web site.]

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Handy Man Blues (Stompin' Tom Connors)
From: Roger the Skiffler
Date: 29 Mar 13 - 06:50 AM

How about: The Gas-Man Cometh (Flanders & Swann)
Under Your Hood (Sonny & Brownie/Champion Jack Dupree)
If it don't fit, don't force it (Barrelhouse Annie)
and for those tired of DIY:
Take this Hammer? (trad)


RtS

Subject: Lyr Add: I GOTTA LOOK UNDER YOUR HOOD
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 31 Mar 13 - 02:58 PM

I left out a lot of patter from this transcription, which I made from a recording on Spotify:


I GOTTA LOOK UNDER YOUR HOOD
As sung by Brownie McGhee & Sonny Terry on "At the Bunkhouse"

Well, your motor's missin', lady; I've got to look up under your hood. (2x)
Well, you know I've got a feelin' that I can do your motor some good.

Well your battery needs chargin'; your spark plugs ain't firin' at all. (2x)
Well, you know your differential is very dry; it's completely out of oil.

I see that your motor block's been busted; your transmission is awful dry. (2x)
Well, if you want me for your mechanic, I'll try to see that you are satisfied.

Well, my prices ain't high; I'm in love with your little machine.
I'll give you an A-number-one job; I'm in love with your little machine.
Well, there ain't nothin' wrong with your generator; whoa! You just been burnin' bad gasoline.

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Handy Man Blues (Stompin' Tom Connors)
From: Bob the Postman
Date: 31 Mar 13 - 10:51 PM

You can get a free download of Billy Bragg's "Handyman Blues" here .

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Handy Man Blues (Stompin' Tom Connors)
From: Roger the Skiffler
Date: 01 Apr 13 - 05:34 AM

Jim,
another couple of verses:
You got automobile trouble baby, something's wrong with your automobile x2
You got a nice little motor, but too many drivers at your wheel
and

You got water in your gas tank, baby,your engine she don't fire at all x2
Try my 100 octane,it'll be purrin' after all
and:

You got a nice pair of headlights, but your bulbs don't stick out far enough x2
When I charge your battery they'll be shinin' sure enough

and Champion Jack's version on your first verse:
Gonna take my screwdriver, look up underneath your hood x2
When I finish screwin', your motor be runnin' real good.

(Absolutely no sexual innendo at all!)

RtS