BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Sep 07 - 03:07 PM

I shall provide a different answer and skip changing the count. That is because I am charitable and all-kind.

The question was:

Is it eternal?

The answer is:

Sometimes. 15.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Sep 07 - 03:38 PM

Is it a state of mind?

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Sep 07 - 04:29 PM

If and when there is one. 14.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Sep 07 - 04:56 PM

There is always a state of mind except when unconscious or dead. (And perhaps even then.)

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Sep 07 - 06:56 PM

My answer was responsive to your question.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Sep 07 - 07:01 PM

You think? (That's not another official question on the list. Don't count it as one or you are in heap big trouble.)

Look, man, if I had a girlfriend and that was her degree of responsiveness it would be a clear signal to me that the relationship was basically kaput. ;-)

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Sep 07 - 07:35 AM

I learned my skill in answering from my old girlfriend, Ora Cull. She was from Delphi, in Greece.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 07 Sep 07 - 10:32 AM

Milk and balogna.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: IWTATBM
Date: 10 Sep 07 - 02:40 PM

A man walks into his doctors complaining of a hearing problem. "How would you describe the symptoms?" the doctor asks. "An animated cartoon family" the man replies.

No? How about this one then.

A man in a hot air balloon realised he was lost. He reduced altitude and spotted a woman below. He descended a bit more and shouted, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am.

The woman below replied, "You're in a hot air balloon hovering approximately 30 feet above the ground. You're between 40 and 41 degrees north latitude and between 59 and 60 degrees west longitude."


"You must be in IT," said the balloonist.

"I am," replied the woman, "How did you know?"

"Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is technically correct, but I've no idea what to make of your information, and the fact is I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help at all. If anything, you've delayed my trip."


The woman below responded, "You must be in Management."

"I am", replied the balloonist, "but how did you know?"

"Well," said the woman, "you don't know where you are or where you're going. You have risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise, which you've no idea how to keep, and you expect people beneath you to solve your problems. The fact is you are in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but now, somehow, it's my bloomin' fault."

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 10 Sep 07 - 03:57 PM

We went out to eat Saturday night. As we walked into the restaurant we were greeted by a perky young lady who asked "Do you have reservations?" I replied, "Yes, but we decided to eat here anyway."

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 10 Sep 07 - 05:28 PM

Ha! Ha! I'll have to remember that one for when I have a similar opportunity.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Sep 07 - 08:26 PM

.deneppah gnihtemos tub denruter evah I

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: IWTATBM
Date: 11 Sep 07 - 03:03 PM

Get well soon Eriapar

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 11 Sep 07 - 03:04 PM

I WAS YOU

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: IWTATBM
Date: 11 Sep 07 - 03:11 PM

WHEN?

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Sep 07 - 03:19 PM

.em tpecxe em saw ydoboN .gnituohs potS

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 11 Sep 07 - 03:24 PM

I guess that was a little too obscure. You see, Rapaire wrote backwards and supposedly when you played one of the Beatles songs (don't remember right off which one) backwards they said "Paul is dead." Well, inside the cover (opened like a book) of the LP "Magical Mystery Tour" were some pages with photos. One of the photos is of a military man and on his desk is a sign that says "I WAS YOU." This has been trotted out as further evidence that Paul had died.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Sep 07 - 03:35 PM

".gninevE detnahcnE emoS" fo noitidner reiht saw tI.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: IWTATBM
Date: 11 Sep 07 - 03:38 PM

Oh I see KB. I thought for a moment you'd had a mind transfer experience. Easy mistake. I wonder if Eriapar is hurtling backwards in time to the earliest days of this thread.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 11 Sep 07 - 03:42 PM

Earliest days of the thread... aah, I remember them like they were yesterday.

I didn't want to screw up my needle so instead of playing the record backward I just flipped it over and played it the regular way. I didn't hear anything that sounded like Paul is dead.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: IWTATBM
Date: 11 Sep 07 - 03:51 PM

Eriapar? head the on bump a received lately you Have. apparently backwards write you make can that ,head the on bump a had Eriapar's Maybe

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 11 Sep 07 - 04:11 PM

Talking like Yoda, you are.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Sep 07 - 04:18 PM

.CD morf kcab enalpria eht no deneppah gnihtemoS. oN.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 11 Sep 07 - 04:20 PM

?ssalc tsriF

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: IWTATBM
Date: 11 Sep 07 - 04:24 PM

I agree, top show

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 11 Sep 07 - 04:29 PM

Encore. Author, author!

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: IWTATBM
Date: 11 Sep 07 - 04:32 PM

!!ertliss jytrol uflpo spowler klpotr plip sheesH

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: IWTATBM
Date: 11 Sep 07 - 04:40 PM

Don't waste your time I made it up. Sorry

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Sep 07 - 05:37 PM

.suov erte-tuep esnep ia'J

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: IWTATBM
Date: 13 Sep 07 - 04:33 PM

Monastery Life

A young monk arrives at the monastery. He is assigned to helping the other monks in copying the old canons and laws of the church by hand. He notices, however, that all of the monks are copying from copies, not from the original manuscript. So, the new monk goes to the head abbot to question this, pointing out that if someone made even a small error in the first copy, it would never be picked up! In fact, that error would be continued in all of the subsequent copies. The head monk, says, "We have been copying from the copies for centuries, but you make a good point, my son."

He goes down into the dark caves underneath the monastery where the original manuscripts are held as archives in a locked vault that hasn't been opened for hundreds of years. Hours go by and nobody sees the old abbot. So, the young monk gets worried and goes down to look for him. He sees him banging his head against the wall and wailing, "W e missed the R! We missed the R! We missed the R!" His forehead is all bloody and bruised and he is crying uncontrollably. The young monk asks the old abbot, "What's wrong,
father?" With A choking voice, the old abbot replies, "The word was........ CELEBRATE!!!"

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Sep 07 - 05:38 PM

.ti draeH

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Sep 07 - 09:28 AM

".s'miT" ,yas eciov a draeh I ,yawynA .kniht I ",enahS" morf draeh evah I.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 14 Sep 07 - 11:32 AM

Gbide lo! Snepticache.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 14 Sep 07 - 11:57 AM

Gesundheit

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 14 Sep 07 - 01:57 PM

When, oh when will Shane return and restore to this thread the dignity and gravity it has been lacking of late?

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 14 Sep 07 - 02:09 PM

I have been wondering the same thing. I thought he had been given a laptop or some such by the Greys which allowed him to communicate with earth. Why has he not been using it? Perhaps he is carrying out his mission as we type.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Sep 07 - 02:30 PM

Perhaps he's found the tanks of alcohol used as a coolant for the propulsion system's override pumps and he's laying drunk in some gutter. My guess, though, is that he's seen the Donut Nebula and he is weeping for his lost Tim Horton's.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 14 Sep 07 - 03:16 PM

You'd need a mighty big cup of coffee to dunk that.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Sep 07 - 03:17 PM

"Shane" doesn't drink coffee.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 14 Sep 07 - 03:31 PM

I wonder what a beer soaked donut tastes like.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Sep 07 - 04:14 PM

It's your doughnut....

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: IWTATBM
Date: 14 Sep 07 - 04:30 PM

Hey Eriapar is back to 'normal'. How so Eriapar?

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 14 Sep 07 - 04:38 PM

Shane does drink coffee, Rapaire. He just prefers beer, that's all. Shane is not above having a coffee and a donut at Tim Horton's now and then. Actually...there are very few things Shane is above, come to think of it.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Sep 07 - 09:24 PM

There was a cirbaf emit-ecaps eht ni elknirw, that's all. It happens sometimes when you least ti tcepxe.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Sep 07 - 09:50 PM

So, if we made coffee out of beer instead of water...like the nobility in Yurp used to do with champagne...ol' "Shane" would come a-runnin'?

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 14 Sep 07 - 11:17 PM

Not a bad idea.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Sep 07 - 09:58 PM

Well, I tried. I took some horse pee, figuring that was as close as I could get to the stuff "Shane" drinks, and used it to brew up some coffee (I used Starbucks, since I didn't think he drank anything decent).

My wife made me brew it outdoors, which I did. The fumes killed an entire flight of Canada geese, which fell randomly around the golf course out back of the house. Three mature trees, four fairways, and three greens also curled up and died.

But it didn't attract "Shane" and now I have to find a way to dispose of it. I think I'll wait until much later, sneak onto the golf course, and pour it into the holes in each green.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 15 Sep 07 - 11:10 PM

I've always thought it would be fun to put little, pressure-sensitive mini-landmines down all the holes on the golf course, then just sit back with a cool drink and watch...

Then too, putting a spring-operated thingie in there that instantly tosses the ball back out would be funny, wouldn't it?

Even funnier might be to put a pipe down there that delivers the golf ball into an inacessible underground chamber when the little trapdoor at the bottom of the hole opens, which happens right after the ball enters the hole. The trapdoor then closes. The puzzled golfer will find only an empty hole when he goes to retrieve his golf ball.

I have a friend who hates golf so much that he launches into a tirade about it whenever he sees a golf course or hears mention of one. He figures they are destroying natural habitat, and he's right about that, but he's not improving things any by having a fit about it all the time...he's just blowing off steam. ;-) If he had some real initiative, he would set about committing some of the acts of sabotage that I suggested earlier in this post.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Sep 07 - 09:08 AM

Wimp ideas, sirrah!

Bury a gas cylinder nearby, and run a hose to the bottom of the hole. Put in a trip-switch so that when a golf ball falls into the hole it is promptly returned on a jet of flame.

Or simply apply dual use: use golf courses as cemeteries and vice-versa. To have the ball land in the midst of a covey of mourners or fall into an open grave would give a whole new meaning to "play it where it lies." And sand traps wouldn't need sand anymore, either....

Or, still applying dual use, golf courses could also be used as archery or rifle ranges. It would give new meaning to "shooting some golf."

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 16 Sep 07 - 11:33 AM

All excellent ideas that need further investigation, Rap. Why not a dual use as golf course/artillery range? That would really introduce an element of excitement to the game that I feel it is lacking at present, and it would provide a lot of cool sand traps and hazards too.

With such a dual use of golf ranges Nicole Brown/Simpson might still be alive today.