BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: IWTATBM
Date: 27 Feb 08 - 03:13 PM

6 days without a post. I blame all these scare stories about orcas or killer whales as they're correctly known. Something more gentle please to attract the punters.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Feb 08 - 05:00 PM

Well, I learned in Alaska that when you're near an orca you never yell "Bite me!" at it.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 21 Feb 08 - 04:57 PM

Well... maybe something took a bite, didn't like him, and spat him to the crushing blackness.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Feb 08 - 04:25 PM

Something must have liked him....

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 21 Feb 08 - 03:34 PM

Many years ago I worked at a sandwich shop in Iowa City with an Inuit woman. One day she said that her brother (who still lived in Alaska) had gone missing while on a hunt. He was not found and eventually she announced that he had probably been eaten. The way I recall it was that he had been hunting at sea and the authorities thought he ad been eaten by an Orca but I am a little fuzzy on that bit (it was a long time ago). She struck me as being rather detached during the whole episode. I never did figure out if that was her nature or if she just didn't like him.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Feb 08 - 06:32 PM

I myself did all of that at the same time. That qualified me for membership in the Idaho Legion.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 20 Feb 08 - 05:47 PM

Yes, there is a test: You have to go way up north, chug a gallon of hard liquor down in under 2 minutes, then snowshoe across fifty miles of tundra, wrassle an Inuit woman, and have sex with a Kodiak bear...

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 20 Feb 08 - 05:35 PM

Am I Canadian? I don't think so, how does one find out for sure? Is there a test? I am a member (in abstentia) of The Idaho Legion. Is that close enough?

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: IWTATBM
Date: 20 Feb 08 - 05:12 PM

Are you Canadian KB? Have I missed something? This thread's getting more confusing by the year.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Feb 08 - 03:21 PM

Oh, yes! Indeed. Certainly.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 20 Feb 08 - 02:49 PM

I have to be a US Senator? Oh, dear, why didn't someone tell me before? Or did you mean that one must be a US Senator to be Canadian?

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Feb 08 - 01:21 PM

Little Hawk? He's Canadian, and I'm fairly sure you have to be a US Senator. At least I think you do.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 20 Feb 08 - 10:26 AM

I'm not a Senator but I have begin to wonder if perhaps he is.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Feb 08 - 08:06 PM

You're not a US Senator, by any chance, are you?

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 19 Feb 08 - 04:42 PM

Yuck!

Well, too bad you didn't have one of those toy guns handy that shoots a suction cup arrow at the other person's forehead.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 19 Feb 08 - 03:46 PM

Many years ago I was in a stall at a large (for the time) mall. After a bit I felt uneasy and when I glanced up I saw a young fellow eye-balling me (as it were) from over the top of the stall. As soon as he saw me looking at him he pulled away. I tried to hurry up and finish my business but a minute or so later I looked up and there he was again. I felt really creepy for the rest of the day.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 19 Feb 08 - 11:45 AM

I've barely ever heard of Larry Craig either, but it may be because I hardly watch any TV.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Feb 08 - 11:42 AM

Neither did most people outside of Idaho (and not everyone there) until recently.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Ebbie
Date: 18 Feb 08 - 08:35 PM

Last week I was at a play (Lady Day, the Billie Holiday one. It was well done; the singer who portrayed her has a wonderful voice and can she act!)and during intermission followed a young woman into the restroom.

I lamented that my cubicle was out of tissue and said, Luckily I hve some in my pocket. She said, Hey, there's lots in here. Just wait a minute.

I put my hand under the wall, waiting and suddenly the ludicrous image hit me. I laughed and said, Darn. This reminds me of Larry Craig.

She had never heard of Larry Craig.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 18 Feb 08 - 02:21 PM

I prefer Weimie-on-a-stick.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Feb 08 - 08:53 PM

Mmmmmmmmm! Cat...the OTHER white meat.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: topical tom
Date: 17 Feb 08 - 12:27 PM

I'm a cat man myself but I prefer them live.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 16 Feb 08 - 01:40 PM

Hey! Anyone else tried Weimie-Burgers yet? They're great!

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 15 Feb 08 - 04:32 PM

Was it a moist towelette? Enquiring minds want to know.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Donuel
Date: 15 Feb 08 - 04:29 PM

Speaking of beavers, I saw two of them last night in Rock Creek.

The National Sun Mirror reported that it was Condi who gave bathroom hand signals to Hillary but Hillary did not know what they meant so she passed her a towelette.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 15 Feb 08 - 04:21 PM

Back in 2000 my mom (a flaming liberal) said she thought W was good looking. Maybe after a night of throwing back a few he and Condi...well, I don't want to start rumors or anything.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 15 Feb 08 - 04:15 PM

I just bet that Condi is a furnace of smouldering passion after hours. ;-) What I can't figure, though, is why she would want to hook up with George Bush. Well, I guess it's the "power" thing. They say it's the ultimate aphrodisiac. And he has kept slim and trim too, that's something you don't see all that much at his age.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 15 Feb 08 - 03:16 PM

Nah, we duzn't git them round here. I hasta crost over intuh Illi-noise.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Feb 08 - 03:10 PM

Yeah, them's the ones. It's about the only newspapers you kin git in Ioway.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 15 Feb 08 - 12:08 PM

Condi looks like the type that could be crazy after hours. W is documentd as such. Alien visits can no longer be doubted (the evidence is overwhelming) so yeah, I believe every word of it. These are the same papers where I learned about the bat-boy and the 800 lb baby (OK maybe he was a little under 800 lbs, I don't remember for sure).

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 15 Feb 08 - 12:05 PM

It is, except for the part about the space aliens... ;-)

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Feb 08 - 11:57 AM

Well, these are the same papers that are covering the W-Laura divorce and how Laura is living in a hotel near the White House while W goes on drunken binges with Condi Rice and a couple space aliens. So yeah, it must all be true.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 15 Feb 08 - 09:16 AM

So are you saying Hillary might be a switch hitter? I can see that. That would be something, not just the first female president but the first lesbian in the bargain. A two-fer, as it were. If you read it in the paper it must be true.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Feb 08 - 06:40 PM

Well, I dunno. I used to read the newspapers in the checkout lanes when Hillary was First Lady and from those headlines she might Winona more than LH. I mean, these are the same papers that have reported Saddam Hussein's submarines were in Lake Michigan and he had a love nest in New Jersey with Osama Bin Ladin, so I'm sure the news was accurate, balanced, and fair.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 14 Feb 08 - 05:32 PM

Hmmmm. That's quite an idea. I would definitely consider it with Winona.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 14 Feb 08 - 05:26 PM

Maybe you can get up a tag team with Winona & Hillary...

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 14 Feb 08 - 05:22 PM

Ha! Dream on...

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 14 Feb 08 - 04:54 PM

Maybe Officer Dana can be my beaver wrestling partner.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Feb 08 - 04:04 PM

Frankly, I doubt that "Shane" would have known how to wrestle anything, much less a beaver. That boy was about a nut short of being a bolthole, and to say he had a screw loose would be giving him a lot more credit than he either needs or deserves.

But he's gone now. Poor "Shane" is daid, his remains drifting among the stars. Axolotl or whatever that guy's name was probed "Shane" so vigorously that "Shane" plumb exploded. Or maybe that should be "dumb exploded." Anyway, that's what my sources on the Intergalactic Board of Controls tell me.

Oh! Yes. Axolotl received a commendation for removing "Shane"'s DNA from the Universal Gene Pool. It was a dirty, filthy, job but someone had to do it.

Officer Dana wept for at least a nanosecond before asking, "Who?"

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 14 Feb 08 - 02:43 PM

You'd better beleive that I will be first in line next time they have try-outs for the beaver wrestling team.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Feb 08 - 02:30 PM

There ain't no beavers in Iowa. I've been to Iowa. I've even spent a couple of nights in Iowa, in Des Moines or Dubuque or one of those "D" towns and even in Avoca, and I've been to places like Ft. Madison and Keokuk dozens of times and I ain't never seen no beavers!!

So she must have been Canadian.

If only "Shane" were still with us perhaps he'd like to meet her.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 14 Feb 08 - 12:57 PM

Bandarlogs, nothing but Bandarlogs!

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 14 Feb 08 - 12:17 PM

She was undoubtedly a charter member of Densa.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: topical tom
Date: 14 Feb 08 - 10:50 AM

And so she was Canadian too, eh?

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 14 Feb 08 - 10:04 AM

Last night I stopped in the small grocery store in our small town to pick up a few things. The young lady at the register was a high school student in another small town a few miles down the road. I deduced this from her clothing, she was wearing a sweatshirt showing her support for one of the athletic teams at her school. On the front of her shirt in big, bright bold letters it said:
BEAVER WRESTLING

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Feb 08 - 09:03 AM

You can get one that sits in your lap....

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Feb 08 - 11:03 PM

Densa, by the way, is the diametrical opposite of Mensa.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: topical tom
Date: 13 Feb 08 - 10:58 PM

I think it's a kind of desk they call a secretary.I don't understand why you have to stand in front of it, though.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Feb 08 - 09:55 PM

Or a prime candidate for Densa.

Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts?
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Feb 08 - 09:52 PM

If she dated "Shane" she wasn't a devil. More like a human sacrifice.