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BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?

Ebbie 09 Oct 06 - 01:48 AM
John O'L 09 Oct 06 - 02:38 AM
alanabit 09 Oct 06 - 02:49 AM
Ebbie 09 Oct 06 - 03:07 AM
Liz the Squeak 09 Oct 06 - 04:20 AM
John O'L 09 Oct 06 - 04:29 AM
GUEST, Topsie 09 Oct 06 - 06:25 AM
Moses 09 Oct 06 - 07:30 AM
Georgiansilver 09 Oct 06 - 08:29 AM
kendall 09 Oct 06 - 08:41 AM
Amos 09 Oct 06 - 09:46 AM
Big Jim from Jackson 09 Oct 06 - 10:42 AM
Donuel 09 Oct 06 - 12:02 PM
Ebbie 09 Oct 06 - 12:31 PM
Dave the Gnome 09 Oct 06 - 12:47 PM
Ebbie 09 Oct 06 - 01:28 PM
An Buachaill Caol Dubh 09 Oct 06 - 02:29 PM
Bill D 09 Oct 06 - 02:53 PM
Ebbie 09 Oct 06 - 02:54 PM
Kaleea 09 Oct 06 - 03:56 PM
Jim Dixon 09 Oct 06 - 06:49 PM
GUEST, Ebbie 09 Oct 06 - 07:00 PM
Elmer Fudd 09 Oct 06 - 08:50 PM
JennyO 10 Oct 06 - 12:37 AM
alanabit 10 Oct 06 - 02:13 AM
Skivee 10 Oct 06 - 03:50 AM
The Fooles Troupe 10 Oct 06 - 04:27 AM
Alan Day 10 Oct 06 - 10:34 AM
LilyFestre 10 Oct 06 - 11:29 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 10 Oct 06 - 01:43 PM
Amos 10 Oct 06 - 03:26 PM
Ebbie 10 Oct 06 - 04:01 PM
rock chick 10 Oct 06 - 09:14 PM
GUEST, Topsie 11 Oct 06 - 07:13 AM
The Fooles Troupe 11 Oct 06 - 10:41 PM
GUEST, Topsie 12 Oct 06 - 05:11 AM
Mr Red 12 Oct 06 - 08:28 AM
Canberra Chris 12 Oct 06 - 10:44 AM
Canberra Chris 12 Oct 06 - 10:51 AM
Bizibod 12 Oct 06 - 07:18 PM

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Subject: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: Ebbie
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 01:48 AM

Click for the 'PermaThread™: List of all joke threads'


I recognize that my brain has an active night life but sometimes it surprises me. Last night I dreamt that I overheard two men talking and one was complaining about how slow the service was - I don't remember where- it seems to me it was a laundry.

Just before I awoke, he laughed and said, 'He put me off six months and then gave me the next Friday.'

Another time I dreamt that a burglar had stripped out a house. In the back yard was a pile of things including a sink. I was mulling on it for a few minutes after I woke and suddenly realized that he had taken everything "including the kitchen sink".

One thing I can count on is waking up every morning with a song in my head, as though a tape had been running all night.

Anybody else?


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: John O'L
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 02:38 AM

I have dreamed things which I thought, on waking, that my subconscious had no business knowing about, but I can't think of any examples just now.

Hmm. That's pretty cryptic isn't it. Well I know what I'm talking about, and so do I.
I think.


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: alanabit
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 02:49 AM

I woke up one night, because of a remark, which someone had made in a dream. An English businessman had told me that Germany was a good place to make money.
"Why?" I asked.
"It's because the Germans think they are organised!" came the reply.
Anybody, who knows Germany well, will understand why I laughed so hard that I woke up.


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: Ebbie
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 03:07 AM

John O'L, do you think your subconscious is a busybody?

Alan, the Germans well organized? Is the Pope Catholic?

lol


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 04:20 AM

I don't, but I did catch Limpit giggling in her sleep more than once, so I guess she does!

LTS


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: John O'L
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 04:29 AM

No Ebbie, not that sort of thing, it's more like it makes assumptions or draws conclusions before my conscious has had time to consider it (whatever it is).
Or something. I'll try really hard to think of a f'rinstance but I'm not confident.


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: GUEST, Topsie
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 06:25 AM

I once dreamed a poem, but when I woke I could only remember the last line:

'Listen to some bright story in the far off hills of mirth'

I've remembered it for about thirty years, perhaps because of the frustration at having forgotten the rest.


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: Moses
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 07:30 AM

My father, long since deceased, was one who enjoyed and often told a good joke.

My Mother once dreamed that he grew half a moustache. When she (in her dream) asked him why he had only grown half a moustache he replied "Well, if I like it I'll grow the other half"


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 08:29 AM

I have woken with a new tune for a song in my head but am not sure if it came by dream or instantaneously..have then gone on amd written the words for it after.


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: kendall
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 08:41 AM

Oh yes, quite often. And I always wake up with a song or tune in my head.


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: Amos
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 09:46 AM

Some people assert that the unconscious range of a mind is (compared tot he aalytical and aware section) as the whole body is compared to a small piece of one toenail. If so it would make sense that a huge range of dynamics subjects and depths of insight would be going on outside the edge of the conscious spotlight, especially at night when the bridle gets relaxed and the demands of waking in ordinary space-time are greatly reduced.

I dream jokes often, having a penchant for the humorous side of things, but I usually can't remember them next morning, or if I do, it's not as funy as it seemed -- "ya woulda hadda been there" sort of thing. It is a very different country with a very different vocabulary out there in SLeep Landia.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: Big Jim from Jackson
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 10:42 AM

A friend of mine dreamed hea ate a giant marshmallow---the next morning, he couldn't find his pillow.


Sorry..............


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: Donuel
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 12:02 PM

I was told in a dream
"I don't know how you got here so soon but your answer is , you know more than you need to know"
"now get out of here, I'm busy trying to remember"


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: Ebbie
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 12:31 PM

"'Listen to some bright story in the far off hills of mirth'" Guest/Topsie

'Listen to some bright story in the far off hills of mirth'

"Where the air sparkles with wit in lofty green halls of earth"



Anyone?


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: Dave the Gnome
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 12:47 PM

I have dreamt a couple of stories which included some humourous bits, as well as scary bits, sad bits and happy bits - The whole gammut of feelings I suppose. Wierdest thing was when I was a kid I dreamt I knew all the words to "Green Door" and when I woke up I could still remember them. Didn't even like the song!

Funny old thing is dreaming...

Cheers

DtG


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: Ebbie
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 01:28 PM

Oh- that reminds me. A few months ago I was teaching a from-my-youth song arrangement to my singing partner - a song where two lines of words and tune are intermingled - and I couldn't remember exactly how it went.

So I dreamt that a short, dark-haired woman wearing a blue dress (Never saw her before and she didn't remind me of anyone I know) appeared at my bedside and sang it to me, firmly. She sang it twice-even though I didn't need the repeat.

So I taught the arrangement to my partner and we still sing it today.


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: An Buachaill Caol Dubh
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 02:29 PM

Ebbie and Topsy: but it was the LAST line that was remembered! And it's a good one.

Amos: I too have often woken up laughing (woken up BECAUSE of the laughing), and on the occasions when I've been able to recall the imagined situations and jokes arising from these they have, invariably, seemed "flat", not to mention weary, stale and unprofitable, in the cold L of D. Snif.


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: Bill D
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 02:53 PM

so...I read to my wife (from the other room) the joke about the Germans.

"Why is that supposed to funny?", she asked.

"Well", I explained, "Because those who 'think' they are organized when they really aren't, can be be manipulated...they are easy marks."

"Oh...", she replied after a moment, "They are Deutche marks, I guess."


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: Ebbie
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 02:54 PM

lol


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: Kaleea
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 03:56 PM

I often dream the answer to something I'm trying to figure out. Like night before last when I saw how I can make a fully dimensional "Nemo" cake for my 2 yr old niece's birthday in a few days. I also dream about things going on in the lives of others, & they later tell me that it happened. I often dream about stuff before it happens. Don't know why.   My Grandad was like that, too.
But jokes? I don't think I have ever dreamed of jokes, exept for the occasional nightmare about my ex.


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 06:49 PM

Once I dreamed a story that I think would actually make a good plot for a kids' movie. Well, at least the premise of a plot. It needs to be fleshed out with details, scenes, characters, and especially, an ending.

An eccentric scientist (think "Back to the Future" or "Honey I Shrunk the Kids") invents a time machine--but it has the limitation that it will only send you five minutes or so into the past (or maybe it allows you to send an object or a message 5 minutes into the past).

The scientist thinks his invention is useless, but the kid hero discovers a use for it. He finds that whenever he makes a stupid mistake that gets him into trouble, the time machine allows him to go back and warn himself. Of course, he has to act fast.

The title of the movie would be "Do Over." (Yeah, I even dreamed the title.)

Trouble is, my conscious mind isn't creative enough, and my unconscious mind isn't disciplined enough, to develop this into a full movie script, so I don't mind giving it away. If anyone wants to use it, just give me credit: "From an idea by Jim Dixon."


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: GUEST, Ebbie
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 07:00 PM

Great idea, Jim. Think of all the marriages it would save!


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: Elmer Fudd
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 08:50 PM

I wish.


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: JennyO
Date: 10 Oct 06 - 12:37 AM

...and the car accidents!


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: alanabit
Date: 10 Oct 06 - 02:13 AM

...and premature ejaculations?


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: Skivee
Date: 10 Oct 06 - 03:50 AM

...and mistakes at the horse track...needlessly burned cookies...overflowing bathtubs...tires ruined by road trash...remarks to your partner that sounded funny in your head...the song you should have known better than to perform...the one you forgot to
I once dreamed the Sunday comics page, in color. I was frustrated that the comics weren't funny in the least. Of course, one of the strips was Ernie Bushmiller's "Nancy", the most unfunny comic strip in all of recorded time. So that one was already a wash.


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 10 Oct 06 - 04:27 AM

Ejaculations can never be premature, because they always come in their own time...


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: Alan Day
Date: 10 Oct 06 - 10:34 AM

I dreamt that a guy was in the middle of St Peter's square in front of the Vatican.He got there early to see the Pope and set up his tent in the middle lit a fire and started his long wait.The square gradually filled with people until it was packed.Suddenly the Pope appeared in the crowd and the crowd parted to let him walk amongst them.He walked up to the man in the tent gave him the sign of the crucefix and then walked back.
" You were lucky" said an onlooker "out of all these people he singled you out for a blessing" Oh he did not bless me said the man,he told me to "Get that tent down and Clear Off".
I woke up laughing at this joke which you may have heard by now as these jokes get around quickly.It is the only one I have ever dreamt.
Al


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: LilyFestre
Date: 10 Oct 06 - 11:29 AM

It's not uncommon for me to wake myself up because I am laughing (out loud) about something in my sleep. Waking up that way makes a great start for the day!!!!

:) Michelle


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 10 Oct 06 - 01:43 PM

I happen to be rereading Tom Robbins Half Asleep in Frog Pajamas, and was struck by a passage in which the main character asks her friend if she thinks dreams ever come true, to which the friend replies:

You aren't talking about dreams, you're referring to your pathetic bourgeoisie ambitions. Dreams don't come true. Dreams are true.


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: Amos
Date: 10 Oct 06 - 03:26 PM

Leave it to you, BWL. What a beautiful quote.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: Ebbie
Date: 10 Oct 06 - 04:01 PM

I have a dog and I have a cat. I don't want a second dog. Last night I dreamt that I had a new yellow, short-haired puppy and that it followed me about everywhere I went.

I wanted to find it a cozy place to go to sleep so I went around gathering cushy pads and looking for a quiet corner of this very busy household that was crowded with noisy guests.


Just as I woke, I realized the answer is in crating it. A good way to start a dog, giving it a 'safe' place and it makes housebreaking much easier.

Oh- you didn't mean 'true', literally? :)


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: rock chick
Date: 10 Oct 06 - 09:14 PM

I have dreamt of songs i have written, they are really good, well in my dreams they are, but then i wake up, i rememebr them, jump out of bed to get a pen and some paper but then forget the words, now i keep a pen and pad by the bedside ready and waiting.


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: GUEST, Topsie
Date: 11 Oct 06 - 07:13 AM

'Dreams are true' - if only. Last night I dreamed I won 500,000 on the lottery.
[Note to self: go and buy a ticket.]


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 11 Oct 06 - 10:41 PM

But, did you write down the numbers?


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: GUEST, Topsie
Date: 12 Oct 06 - 05:11 AM

I remembered some of them, but they didn't come up in the draw last night. Ah well . . .


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: Mr Red
Date: 12 Oct 06 - 08:28 AM

I used to analyse my dreams and even predicted my divorce - if only I had read the clues!!!!

Anyways - my experience is that dreams are full of puns, wordplay, ambiguous referrences. Which is the stuff of jokes. Homonyms, homophones, rhymes (begining, internal, or endings ) etc and I do remember being happy in most of them. Not like now - I am happy in life - instead.


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: Canberra Chris
Date: 12 Oct 06 - 10:44 AM

Yes I do. I woke up laughing one morning because I had dreamed of two young frogs bragging. One said, "My Daddy says that when I grow up I can put my elbows on the table." The other one said "That's nothing, my Daddy says that when I grow up I can put my legs on the plate."

Ouch! Pretty black, eh?

I have also dreamt music, and poetry - very rarely of course, you have to be dreaming it, and then woken up by something while in the dream, and then able to recall and hold it long enough to get it down. When I woke with dreams more often I got good at staying just asleep enough to hold it, and awake enough to write it down.

I managed this way to get the whole of the following poem down intact, which I have had published, though I consider myself to have channelled it from heaven knows what rather than written it. I think I must have been eavesdropping on angels.

IN THE ETHER

Until the first of us three leave,
Our conversation shall be on this earth
Although not of it

For as we three are star children
Our ears are attuned to sounds
Beyond this world

Of music shall our first discourse be,
Whose harmonies shall lead us on
And outward to the spheres

Our conversation shall lose gravity,
Becoming light and subtle as the waves
Of pure intelligence

Our subject next shall be philosophy,
Whose knots undone shall like dissected webs
Yield strands of different kinds

For that's the very fabric of our thought,
We only see the clear warp of our thought
And not the hidden weft

Thus are our minds connected and transfigured,
Harmonies shimmering between the words
Like sympathetic strings

And shall we talk of spirits? Ah. no need,
They mingle in our minds and mouths and hush us
As a celestial sea.

                                  Remembered from a dream by Chris Clarke

Holding and getting all that down exactly was the biggest effort of concentration in my life. I had to stay half asleep and half awake for over an hour. I do write, but not like that. I didn't know until some time later that 'web' is also a technical term for fabric formed of warp and weft.

At least I had a good excuse for getting up late!

Chris


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: Canberra Chris
Date: 12 Oct 06 - 10:51 AM

One little correction, in third last verse, the middle line should be:

We only see the clear warp of our mind

Sorry, it's late here! Time I was dreaming again.

Chris


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Subject: RE: BS: Do You Ever Dream Jokes?
From: Bizibod
Date: 12 Oct 06 - 07:18 PM

Once ,as a kid ,dreamed a joke that woke me up laughing.
"16 bees flew into a hive , how many bees were in there? None, because they left through the back door......"
Hmmmmmm, seemed really funny and clever at the time......strange....


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