To ALL Mudcatters

Subject: To ALL Mudcatters
From: Sam Pirt
Date: 21 Mar 99 - 06:18 PM

Hi ALL fellow Mudcatters out there !!

I've just become a member of Mudcat, I just wanted to say that I'm looking forward to haveing many an in-depth and interesting conversation about Music, Song and dance.

P.S Has anyone got any tips?

Speak later no doubt!

Bye, Sam

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: catspaw49
Date: 21 Mar 99 - 06:35 PM

Actually Sam, we also have conversations on the best way to prepare groundhog, the CIA, dancing hamsters, Erectile Dysfunction, VietNam, Clinton, the merits of our favorite condoms, and other esoteric topics. We are actually coming out with our own Condom line with special member models. To get a feel for this community we have here (and it IS a community, not a website) do a little background reading in previous forum threads. Refresh for 180 or 365 and pick out some topics.......

Now if you'll just hang out here, the head of the Welcome Wagon...a big Mick named Big Mick will drop by and say welcome along with a basketful of whatever we got left around here from St Pat's.

In the meantime...Glad you're here and welcome to the 'Cat.

catspaw

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: Barbara
Date: 21 Mar 99 - 06:51 PM

Uhm, catspaw, that's a pretty biased-in-favor-of-the-wierdness-you-write topic list. Maybe Sam is somewhat more normal,hmmm? Sam, I suggest you read through some of the threads you see here to get a sense of what we're like and what we talk about, and feel free to add your thoughts to any of them, except please God, the condom thread, since it's getting too fat to load. (catspaw, shut up).
Welcome, and blessings,
Barbara

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: katlaughing
Date: 21 Mar 99 - 06:58 PM

Welcome, Sam, and remember, lest ye suffer the derision and chiding of ye old Mudcateers, be sure to be specific when you post new threads. This one was fine. I'm just talking about if you happen to go looking for some lyrics; be sure to put the name in the Thread Title and you'll be okay, but NOT unless you searched the DT database first!

Seriously, I've been on since January and I have found the Mudcat to truly be a community of caring and fun-loving people from varied walks of life, countries, and backgrounds; some are more caustic than others, some get a little snippy, some are just downright hospitable, but they are ALL lovers of good traditional music and have delightful and wicked wits! Enjoy!

katlaughing

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: Susan A-R
Date: 21 Mar 99 - 07:19 PM

Welcome to a lovely mix that seems to generally warm my heart, split my sides with laughing, and provide me with interesting infromation/food for thought on folk music. Barbara's advice is sound. roam around and find out what goes on or off as the case may be.

Susan ps. nobody has complained about spelling here either, unless it gets in the way of an accurate search of the database. Oh, and cruise the database. I love just drifting around in the subjects listing and finding interesting titles.

Have fun, and welcome.

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: McMusic
Date: 21 Mar 99 - 08:35 PM

Don't listen to 'em Sam. Actually, we're all aged little priests and nuns who do this late in the evenings when we're feeling particularly naughty--and our superiors aren't looking.

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: Big Mick
Date: 21 Mar 99 - 09:07 PM

Welcome Sam, to our town. It is a thoroughly enjoyable little place full of great, if somewhat warped from time to time, folkies and we welcome you to our community. I am the forementioned big mick who is known as Big Mick.

You asked for tips, let me give you a few. If you want the lyrics to a specific song, always search the Digital Tradition (otherwise referred to as the DT) before making a request in the forums. You do this by using the blue box in the upper right hand corner at the top of every thread. Scroll up to the top of this thread now, and you will see it. You can search it by exact title or keywords. Use brackets like this [phrase you are looking for] if you are looking for an exact phrase. If you don't find it there, then do a forum search. You find this at the top of the Main Forum page in the menu. When you use this, you are searching all the previous threads in the Mudcat. Often times lyrics have been posted there that have not made it into the DT yet. You can also use this to search for a specific topic or all the posts of a given contributor. You can search the body or the subject or by a specific persons name. Jump into it and you will see what I am talking about. If these fail, then start a thread. When you start a thread in which you are looking for a specific set of lyrics, be specific. It should be titled LYR REQ:(Name of song). We strongly discourage names like "I am desperate for the lyrics to........". A thread that starts like this will get you an introduction to the legendary 'Catter ability to heap scorn upon you with laser like precision. It will be a cathartic (sp?) experience to say the least. Enough with the windbag, now.

So get in here lad, publican......pull the boyo a jar of Uncle Arthurs (dat's Guinness to you, nimbus.........and get set to enjoy the craic. You are now a member of the finest worldwide bunch of folkies you have ever had the pleasure of being in the presence of. And we are glad you are here.

Mick

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: catspaw49
Date: 21 Mar 99 - 09:13 PM

Ah Barbara dear, you do me great injustice!!! Sam had already spoken of music, song, and dance which is the basis for our existence. I was simply suggesting that a diversity of topics exists; and I too DID suggest he go back and research old threads. And Barbara, it was not I who even suggested a condom thread existed, let alone making any comments about "loading." (although a part II was started,not by me,to avoid the problem). I'm sure too you will have noticed that in this most recent spate of "boilerplate info" refreshes, not once did I refresh that particular thread...and you have NO idea how difficult that was!!! Your implication that I am some sort of mangy stray lacking in any redeeming social value that should be banished to the litter box, cuts me to the very marrow of my being...it's COMPLETELY accurate, just cuts me to the very marrow of my being. Oh well.......

Sam...Here at Mudcat you will find helpful, giving, caring and generous people. You will discover some of the most intense discussions on all types of history that could be used in any college classroom; technical topics on performance, gear, musicology, and song development usable in any trade publication or school; sage advice and wisdom from people whose lives have been spent on the folk scene, including performing artists, like Art Thieme; collectors who preserve through the recording and written word, like Sandy and Caroline Paton, and many others from a variety of folk backgrounds. Many of us here,including me, are in a sort of awe that we share this community together. You will find divergent opinions and tastes covering the broad spectrum of "folk" music. And most importantly you will find a willingness to "agree to disagree" but always with respect for the love of the traditions, no matter how old or new, that keep folk alive...and with love, caring, and respect for each other and our little village. By the way, the Tree Planting Committee will be around for donations, be as generous as possible.

So Barbara, though I'm cut to the quick,***GRIN*** I hope I still qualify for, say, perhaps an occasional blessing??? ***sheepish grin***

catspaw...returning to the litter box

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: Banjer
Date: 21 Mar 99 - 09:17 PM

Do we have any tips??? Well, you mean besides "Don't eat the yellow snow?" or "Leave sleeping dogs lie?" Yes there are maybe a few tips,but it looks like Big Mick pretty much already covered them....Welcome to the community, I am a newcomer here myself, but all that has been said in the previous posts is true, a finer group of people you will be hard pressed to find, bar none!

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: Alice
Date: 21 Mar 99 - 09:36 PM

Sam.... one more tip, this forum is addictive. Staying up late to read one more thread or find one more lyric may become hazardous to your mental health. Welcome aboard.

alice in montana

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: Barbara
Date: 22 Mar 99 - 01:58 AM

aww, catspaw, don't hark a hairball, I was just trying to make Sam more generally welcome, just in case he doesn't have the same bizarre taste you do.
Here's some haiku for you. See especially the one about the cat.

Dog Haiku

I love my master;
Thus I perfume myself with
This long-rotten squirrel.

I lie belly-up
In the sunshine, happier than
You ever will be

Today I sniffed
Many dog behinds-I celebrate
By kissing your face.

I sound the alarm!
Paper boy-come to kill us all-
Look! Look! Look! Look! Look!

I sound the alarm!
Garbage man-come to kill us all-
Look! Look! Look! Look! Look!

I lift my leg and
Whiz on each bush . Hello, Spot-
Sniff this and weep

How do I love thee?
The ways are numberless as
My hairs on the rug.

My human is home!
I am so ecstatic I have
Made a puddle

I Hate my choke chain-
Look, world, they strangle me! Ack
Ack Ack Ack Ack Ack!

Sleeping here, my chin
On your foot -no greater bliss-well,
Maybe catching rats

Look in my eyes and
Deny it. No human could
Love you as much I do

The cat is not all
Bad-she fills the litter box
With Tootsie Rolls

Dig under fence-why?
Because it's there. Because it's
There. Because it's there.

I am your best friend,
Now, always, and especially
When you are eating.

My owners' mood is
Romantic-I lie near their
Feet. I fart a big one.

There. Now do you feel better?
Blessings,
Barbara

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: bseed(charleskratz)
Date: 22 Mar 99 - 02:44 AM

Sam, don't let Big Mick intimidate you with his insistance that you check the database and allthe threads going back for a year before you ask for lyrics: some of the best threads started as a result of someone asking what someone else considered a dumb question. I remember one entitled "Lyrics wanted"--the questor failed to write a message after the thread title, which contained no title. But various of the characters in this zoo kept the thread going for sixty or so postings, just building on whatever inane entries had gone before. Another caution: there are some purists in this place who get upset if your messages aren't directly related to the first posting. Ignore them. Or after saying what you want to say, toss in some meaningless "mandatory thread content" just to forstall them. Art Thieme isn't the only performer on the threads, although he's our most shameless punster, both here and in his performances (He has a wonderful cd with a lot of great songs and some outrageous puns--you can find mention of it in the threads, or you can check the website of his publisher, waterbug.com.

And Barbara, although my dogs don't write haiku, one came to me while walking them:

walking 'neath the palms
list'ning to the pigeons coo
dodging pigeon poop

--seed

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: AlistairUK
Date: 22 Mar 99 - 05:03 AM

Oy You welchers nobody's named a condom after me...I feel I've been dissed *harumph* >o(

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: catspaw49
Date: 22 Mar 99 - 05:42 AM

Well these things take time. First, the condom must fit, so to speak, the personality of the Mudcateer. (Please see the "Can We Lighten Up" thread for details) Then of course there are the R & D and the Testing phases which can be equally time consuming. For instance the Rick Fielding Model I, based on Rick's interest in vintage guitars, has hit a snag. The abalone rosette was not a problem, but the herringbone and MOP inlay is causing enormous pain to our testers.

Feel free to come up with your own design suggestions to best fit your personality and interests and we'll try to work it out. Maybe we need a thread for that purpose.

There are some models already available but unnamed for which I can find no takers. The "Short Time Skivvy Guy" model for instance. It comes with a tiny CD installed that plays one chorus and one verse of "Irish Washerwoman" before blowing out. Interested?

Let us know and we're happy to try to oblige!!!

catspaw

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: Bill in Alabama
Date: 22 Mar 99 - 06:18 AM

Barbara-- Great Haiku! Suits my friend (canine) Cap'm Sam Weller perfectly!

Bill

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: catspaw49
Date: 22 Mar 99 - 07:15 AM

Seed my man, what a terrible thought!!! How could you ever suggest that this place is less than serious. And your implication that somehow anyone here would take a wonderful thread about, say, songs, music, and dance and somehow turn it into something else as far removed as ... oh, I dunno', ...maybe something like, uh, say Pigeon Poop, is just absurd.

And Barbara...I must echo Bill. Truly GREAT HAIKU !!! My weimaraner was totally enthralled. When we reached the tootsie roll verse he went over and pawed at the cat door to the basement. I wasn't aware you had it in you. Congratulations upon such a fine post. (You may now come join me in the litter box)

catspaw

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: Ferrara
Date: 22 Mar 99 - 09:05 AM

Okay, Barbara, I guess it's dueling haiku. The following Cat Haiku were sent to me by balladsinginSue, who has recently becomed a Mudcat member. Actually I think the dog ones are even funnier maybe.

You never feed me.
Perhaps I'll sleep on your face.
That will sure show you.

You must scratch me there!
Yes, above my tail! Behold,
Elevator butt.

I need a new toy.
Tail of black dog keeps good time.
Pounce! Good dog! Good dog!

The rule for today
Touch my tail, I shred your hand
New rule tomorrow

In deep sleep hear sound
Cat vomit hairball somewhere
Will find in morning

Grace personified,
I leap into the window.
I meant to do that.

Blur of motion, then --
Silence, me, a paper bag.
What is so funny?

The mighty hunter
Returns with gifts of plump birds --
Your foot just squashed one

You're always typing.
Well, let's see you ignore my
Sitting on your hands.

My small cardboard box.
You cannot see me if I
Can just hide my head.

Terrible battle.
I fought for hours. Come and see!
What's a 'term paper'?

Kitty likes plastic
Confuses for litter box
Don't leave tarp around

Small brave carnivores
Kill pine cones and mosquitoes
Fear vacuum cleaner

Want to trim my claws?
Don't even think about it!
My yelps will wake dead.

I want to be close
To you. Can I fit my head
inside your armpit?

Wanna go outside.
Oh, no! Help! I got outside!
Let me back inside!

Oh no! Big One
has been trapped by newspaper!
Cat to the rescue!

Humans are so strange.
Mine lies still in bed, then screams!
My claws aren't that sharp ...

Cats meow out of angst
"Thumbs! If only we had thumbs!
We could break so much!"

Litter box not here
You must have moved it again
I'll crap in the sink.

The Big Ones snore now
Every room is dark and cold
Time for "Cup Hockey"

We're almost equals
I purr to show I love you
Want to smell my butt?

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: catspaw49
Date: 22 Mar 99 - 09:25 AM

More Great Haiku ... All 9 of our cats give it a butts-up. Certain verses were picked by all as classics, while others were quite kitty specific. A bit risque, but I'm proud of you and balladsinginsue (she's gotta' shorten that).

"Two more for the litterbox Barbara."

catspaw

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: AlistairUK
Date: 22 Mar 99 - 09:27 AM

aren't haikus s'posed to have like, only 17 syllables?

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: Ferrara
Date: 22 Mar 99 - 09:40 AM

Yeah, Alistair, it should be 5-7-5 on the syllables. But I didn't count, I just laughed. Most of them are OK.

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: AlistairUK
Date: 22 Mar 99 - 09:43 AM

Ferrara: I'm just being pedantic and obnoxious so I can qualify as a bonefide 'Catter, when I do then I can be nice again (if i ever was that is).

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: Art Thieme
Date: 22 Mar 99 - 10:05 AM

I think that I shall never see,
Haiku's fine as all of these.
So here I leave the rhyme-scheme of this clever tome, In hopes that someday soon I may be called to write,
A verse that's worthy of somehow being called a poem.

(note alternate rhyming ending)

WELCOME ABOARD!!

...and everyone here knows that the line about letting dogs lie is actually about sheep. Don't be sheepish at all. (Can't pull the wool over my...)

And every new member is issued a brand new one o' those things for the prevention of disease only. Yes, every MEMBER needs his (or her) own...

Art Thieme

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: catspaw49
Date: 22 Mar 99 - 10:18 AM

Geez Art, where you been??? Who else would call me on the "member" thing ("thing" will undoubtedly be next).

You'll be happy to know the "Art Thieme" model with a bad joke written on each one is ready to go into production soon. I was a little leery of some of the jokes we used (like the one that says "The Joke's Inside") but we expect really good opening sales on this model.

Keep up with the bad jokes so there will be plenty of material for the second and third runs.

catspaw

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: Barbara
Date: 22 Mar 99 - 10:38 AM

Ah, catspaw, I liked them too, but I didn't write them. Just another howl that showed up in my IN box one day, with 10 forwards and no author. Can I stay in the litter box anyway? These tootsie rolls are fun; look at the litter spray when I use a wedge to hit it out of the trap!
Blessings,
Barbara

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: Rosebrook
Date: 22 Mar 99 - 11:15 AM

Blessings Barbara,

What a howl!! We have two dogs and five cats. I started reading your dog haiku to my kids this mornin' while they were having their breakfast. They cracked up! Unfortunately, my son had not quite swallowed a swig of milk during one of the more bodily-function oriented haikus, and well, you guessed.... Abby (the bigger dog) strolled over and jumped on my lap while I was reading, obviously interested in hearing more poetry that she could relate to. At the end of the poetry reading, my son asked if he could finish his milk now? Thanks for a fun moment!

Rose

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: bill\sables
Date: 22 Mar 99 - 02:59 PM

Welcome Sam to the best folk community in the world. If any mudcatters would like to see Sam try the web site www.ypc.co.uk/shananikins Cheers Bill

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: skarpi Iceland
Date: 22 Mar 99 - 03:34 PM

Whoooooo, What a thread. Sam welcome to mudcat, I do not know where you are from but I hope you can get all the help you need. I am the only Icelander on the mudcat and all this great folks have give me a lot of help.

sl n go foil,dia duit. skarpi Iceland.....

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: katlaughing
Date: 22 Mar 99 - 05:12 PM

Okay, I used to write poems, really quick, silly one for the local Humane Society doggie fashion shows, so I tried a few quick haikus while the cats and dog are gathered 'round me for hopefully some quick inspiration:

For Cats: you know who you are!

Walk across the plane Of table full of their food Offer my arsehole!

Kissees, Kissees, Mmm Raspy tongue take old skin off Wake up, feed me NOW!

A mouse, a mouse, my Master for a tasty mouse! Nibble, leave on floor.

Pet me at your risk No guarantee I will purr Tiger may wake...bite.

Chummy Trsytan rubs The dog, Merlee, thinks he's nice Too late, claws strike nose!

Gawd, what have I done? Workday gone and I have played Skip Mudcat? No way!

THIS IS FUN!

katlaughing

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: katlaughing
Date: 22 Mar 99 - 05:17 PM

Once more with html:

Walk across the plane,
Of table full of their food
Offer my arsehole!

Kissees, Kissees, Mmm
Raspy tongue take old skin off
Wake up, feed me NOW!

A mouse, a mouse!
My Master for a tasty mouse!
Nibble, leave on floor.

Pet me at your risk
No guarantee I will purr
Tiger may wake...bite.

Chummy Trsytan rubs
The dog, Merlee, think's he's nice
Too late, claws strike nose!

Gawd, what have I done?
Workday gone and I have played
Skip Mudcat? No way!

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: AlistairUK
Date: 22 Mar 99 - 05:44 PM

Doggie Fashion shows the mind boggles...especially if you aren't careful about where the sentence stress goes!!

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: katlaughing
Date: 22 Mar 99 - 05:51 PM

Watch it, AlistairUK, you might bypass Catspaw and Art Thieme in decadence! We'll put you in a ginat litter box all your own! It had nothing to do with that! ***BIG, BIG GRIN!***

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: Art Thieme
Date: 22 Mar 99 - 05:56 PM

Catspaw. Where've I been? Been moving---finally. Been unpacking. Chris, our son, took our cat, Jack Kerouac---so, alas, no litterboxes to clean now. All the better---those small pieces of litter'd get stuck under my fingernails.

Art

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: catspaw
Date: 22 Mar 99 - 09:02 PM

katlaughing dear...Don't take the crude doggie fashion joke too hard. After all, you tempered it by saying it was for the humane society and as everyone knows, the humane society gives out free elbow and knee pads...because they are so humane!!! And if the whole doggie fashion bit is just unbearable (crude as you stated), then many humane societies will give you breath spray for your dog...because they are so humane.

Art...Sorry, I thought you had moved already. We have nine cats and I am forever plagued with that litter under the nails problem.

catspaw

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: katlaughing
Date: 22 Mar 99 - 11:57 PM

Now , Catspaw, I never said crude! Just mentioned a bit o'decadence!***BG***

Kat that I am, I can still say some of my best friends have been real dawgs! ARRgggghhhhh! I can just imagine what you'll do with THAT!

You guys ever heard of nail trimming? Saves the back-raking AND keeps the grit out!

LaughinglyKat

Subject: RE: To ALL Mudcatters
From: Art Thieme
Date: 23 Mar 99 - 12:50 AM

Kat,

Naw, I never had to trim the nails; the litter'd keep 'em worn down real nice. But now the small pieces have gotten so darn elusive--- there was no getting the stuff very clean at all. So we had to get rid of the cat.(Kat, you come here often? What's your sign? Me, I'm a feces.)

Art ;-)