 sj |
||
|
||
BS: How does one become a Geordie then?
|
|
|
Subject: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Dave the Gnome Date: 02 Mar 07 - 06:39 AM Well, the line it is drawn, the curse it is cast... For good or ill I have given up my job travelling around the country breaking peoples computers and have taken good honest employment in Newcastle upon Tyne for at least a year (I hope!) It means I will be leaving my beloved Salford on a Mon-Fri basis and living up where the accents are strange and people wear no clothes in the snow. I have a couple of weeks yet so any advice would be welcome. Do I substitute Holt's bitter for Newcastle Brown? Do I stop saying 'Eh, up and gradely in favour of Why aye and canny? Do I replace the thermal long johns and wooly hat with a t-shirt and shorts? One thing I did find - I shouldn't miss my Monday Folk Club at the White Lion - Apparently the oldest club in the country, The Bridge, is also on a Monday! Looking forward to doing some missionary work... Cheers Dave |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Alec Date: 02 Mar 07 - 06:51 AM Welcome in advance Dave! You will find assimilation of linguistic difference will happen naturally without any conscious effort on your part.Drink what you like.Wear what you like on the proviso you avoid anything with red and white stripes. You will be located within easy travelling distance of some of the most beautiful countryside in Britain. Further to this,you will be able to tap into a vibrant and distinctive cultural scene of which the SAGE & the Theatre Royal are between them merely a small part. Enjoy yourself. :0) |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: GUEST Date: 02 Mar 07 - 07:00 AM You have to be born one Dave. Be true to thyself, they'll respect you the more for it. Don't wear t-shirt and shorts in the snow, they'll think you're a softy and unless you're prepared to undergo genetic engineering don't over indulge the broon ale. Hope you enjoy your time there. |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Scrump Date: 02 Mar 07 - 07:02 AM It's a canny place and no mistake. Dave, don't omit to check out the The Cumberland Arms too. Good ales as well as music :-) |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Bainbo Date: 02 Mar 07 - 07:12 AM Dave, please, for God's sake, don't start saying Canny and Why Aye. When I moved from Preston to the North East, some - gosh - 28 years ago, I started mimicking the locals' accent to take the mick. Now I can't help it. I talk like them all the time. I'm rootless. Geordies and Mackems can tell I'm not from round here, and when I go back home, people don't think I'm a Lanky either. Please - hang on to your accent! Now, as for going out, I find The Burglar's Dog guide quite entertaining. If you can navigate the search function. Doesn't seem to work too well on my browser. And, obviously, it's more fun finding out for yourself. In genera, stay away from the posey, yuppie Quayside - apart from the Crown Posada. As well as The Bridge, I gather the Cumberland Arms in Byker has quite a good music scene, though I've never made it there myself. And if you're mobile, Washington has a good Saturday night folk club, the Davy Lamp , though it's more of a concert club. Although the Sage music centre gets some good acts, I seem to be in a minority of one in not really liking it. Atmosphere's completely flat. Except in the smaller, more intimate, Hall 2. I've seen cracking sets by June Tabor, and the McGarrigle sisters in there. Anyway, welcome to the North. PM me if you fancy a pint one night. |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Bainbo Date: 02 Mar 07 - 07:31 AM Sorry. Just realised that when I said ...moved from Preston to the North East, that should have been to the North East of England. It riles the Scots no end when we refer to this area as the North. |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: GUEST,bobbyshafto Date: 02 Mar 07 - 08:38 AM We wouldn't want to rile the Scots would we Bainbo? Sensetive little flowers...of Scotland. Dave, the Geordies are the first line of defence against the Scots. Help keep them on their side of the wall and you could qualify for honorary Geordie status. Hadrian was the first to have this honour bestowed on him so you would be joining some very illustrious company. |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: jimlad9 Date: 02 Mar 07 - 09:28 AM Dave,Marra I regret to inform you that you are ineligible for Geordie Citizenship. Geordies as everybody knows are just Scotsmen with their brains kicked out so unless you were born in that Godforsaken land its too late for you. I spent 30 years+ working with Geordies at a well loved nuclear plant in Cumbria and at the end of that time I was no nearer understanding the buggers than on day one. My advice is learn Swahili,Mandarin Chinese or God help you Welsh. However if you insist here are some helpful phrases Am ganninyam marra.................................I am going home my dearest friend Wheesht!!...................................................Shut thi' gob (lanky) Be quiet please Shizgorrareetpurofnoccas...........................She is a big lass and a bonny lass. |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: skipy Date: 02 Mar 07 - 09:52 AM We didn't need a wall, a row of toll gate wouild have done it! |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: GUEST,ib48 Date: 02 Mar 07 - 09:53 AM you get half yer brain removed and eat lots of pies |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Scrump Date: 02 Mar 07 - 09:53 AM There are also folk sessions at the Black Bull, in Bridge St, Blaydon, I think on Thursdays, but I don't know any details. Unlike Bainbo, I was impressed with the Sage. But I agree with him about the Crown Posada :-) |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Bagpuss Date: 02 Mar 07 - 10:21 AM How do you tell a Geordie? Divvent bother, he won't be telt! |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Dave the Gnome Date: 02 Mar 07 - 02:05 PM This is the stuff I need! Thanks all and keep 'em coming. It's the type of stuff you can only learn on the Mudcat :D |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Ruth Archer Date: 02 Mar 07 - 02:20 PM I've found it ever so easy. Pet. |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Bainbo Date: 02 Mar 07 - 03:04 PM Dave. It's just occurred to me. You'll be well on the way when you can understand these jokes: Geordie's taking afternoon tea with the Queen when in comes one of those posh multi-tiered cake racks full of petit-fours and bourbon creams and the like. "Well, Geordie," says Her Maj. "I suppose you'd like some batttenberg, or a meringue?" "Nah, pet, you're reet," replies Geordie. "Ah'll hev the battenberg." Geordie's car stops on the Newcastle motorway, so he phones the AA (or Eeyuh-Eeyuh, as they call it round here). "Ah've brokken doon," he says. "Reet," says the AA man. "Are you ower heatin'?" "Nah," says Geordie. "Ah'm ower Byker." translations on request |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Mr Red Date: 03 Mar 07 - 05:33 AM First of all beware who you call a Geordie. Some of them are Makems once you know the difference - there will be less arguement. And wearing a T-shirt when it is 40 below would endear you to them. |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Alec Date: 03 Mar 07 - 06:10 AM Oh yes,one other thing you need to know Dave. It is nowhere near as cold 'round these parts as some would have you believe. |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Bagpuss Date: 03 Mar 07 - 06:46 AM Although he is technically a Makem, coming from the Washington area, try watching or listening to a Bobby Thompson video/soundfile. If you can understand most of it, you are doing very well. http://www.geocities.com/bobby_thompson_uk/http://www.geocities.com/bobby_thompson_uk/ |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Herga Kitty Date: 03 Mar 07 - 07:40 AM Ask Dave Webber (who was made an honorary Geordie at the last National Festival at Sutton Bonington....) Kitty |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Bagpuss Date: 03 Mar 07 - 10:04 AM Oops, mucked up the link above: The Little Waster |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Dave Sutherland Date: 03 Mar 07 - 12:38 PM Don't refer to it as Newkee Brown whatever you do. |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Scrump Date: 03 Mar 07 - 01:31 PM Ganonkiddagetstuckin! |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: DMcG Date: 03 Mar 07 - 02:50 PM You'll be well on the way when you can understand these jokes And the advanced level is reached when you can present the following in the right accents so it is revealed as a joke: Southern Doctor: Well, Geordie, your leg is healing nicely. You'll soon be able to walk. Geordie: Work? I can hardly walk! |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Bainbo Date: 03 Mar 07 - 03:47 PM And champion spoons player Bertie Draycott used to reckon that on a train trip down to London, he was trying to start a conversation in his carriage, really annoying some of the Southerners on board. Eventually, in an effort to distract him, one of them got a pack of playing cards out and asked him: "Do you know any card games, Geordie?" "Why Aye" answers Bertie. "Ice hockey." "Ice hockey?" says the Southerner. "That ain't a card game." Bertie replies: . . . . . "Cardest game I know, bonny lad." |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: GUEST,BOAB Date: 04 Mar 07 - 02:19 AM "Geordiehoiahammaower!" "Dis thou lyke correnkyekk"? Dis Ah lyke correnkyek?--whey Lad Ah thinks Ah'm dis!" "Howay in the hoose Man, an' heat thee knackers et the yag!" Ah---Prudhoe taaalk, man! |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Alec Date: 04 Mar 07 - 04:05 AM Prudhoe? "Do you know who buit the Ark?" "Noah" "That's right." "But I said Noah." That's Prudhoe. |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Dave Sutherland Date: 04 Mar 07 - 06:59 AM Chris Tarrant "Can you name a tribe of people who eat humans?" Geordie "Canaabaalls" |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: GUEST,buspassed Date: 04 Mar 07 - 07:07 AM How does ONE become a Geordie then? Ey' pet! That Prince Charles is asking daft questions again! |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Geordie-Peorgie Date: 04 Mar 07 - 05:45 PM yer aall cheeky bugerz an' nee mistake! - Especially you FRISPS!! Ye wadn't hev any Scots if a Vikin' hadn't shagged a pig!! |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Seaking Date: 04 Mar 07 - 05:52 PM Learn the language first... When I first went to South Shields in the 70's I was loaned a record called 'Larn Yersel' Geordie', recorded as I remember by Mike Neville and George House, from the local BBC news programme. Vaguely remember learning to say 'Gann doon road t' see wor canny lass' or something similar. Never did get to use it in casual conversation.. |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: katlaughing Date: 04 Mar 07 - 06:38 PM Dave, be careful. Have a listen what happened to this fellah: HERE and he didn't even live THERE! |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Scrump Date: 05 Mar 07 - 08:46 AM I second Seaking's recommendation for learning the Geordie lingo. As well as Larn Yersel Geordie, there were two more records (that I'm aware of) - Son of Geordie and Geordierama. |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: GUEST,Bainbo at waaark Date: 05 Mar 07 - 09:04 AM Learning the lingo may be useful for understanding the natives. But it's not like going abroad, when you're advised to try to use a few words of the local language because they'll appreciate the effort. Don't. They won't. |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Dave the Gnome Date: 05 Mar 07 - 11:50 AM What was the Spanish/Geordie Football manager called on the Fast Show? Bit like that Maltese bloke! :-) How do you make a Maltese Cross? Stamp on his foot... :D |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Alec Date: 05 Mar 07 - 11:58 AM What was the Spanish/Geordie Football manager called on the fast show? Julio Geordio. |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Scrump Date: 06 Mar 07 - 05:42 AM you get half yer brain removed and eat lots of pies Howey up - ah thowt 'e were gannin' to Newcassel not Wiggin* *This is an example of "Lordy", a new hybrid language - part Lanky, part Geordie - that I just invented to help Dave make the transition from Lanky to Geordie. "Larn Thissel Lordy" - available from all good bookshops** ** The ones that don't sell it are crap bookshops. |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Alec Date: 06 Mar 07 - 05:58 AM Oh Lordy. |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: A Wandering Minstrel Date: 06 Mar 07 - 08:36 AM Well forst ye hev to get a tayste for pork and pease pudden stotties, Then you hev to find oot that scotch is beer and not whisky. Then if someone says te ye "He was gannin inbye the bottom of a chare suckin a penny brick" and you knaa what he means, then yer aboot half-ways. Howay man we're born not made ye knaa! |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Dave the Gnome Date: 06 Mar 07 - 10:45 AM I've learnt "Wor Geordie's lost 'is penker doon the double rah" :D |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Bert Date: 06 Mar 07 - 11:41 AM I will be leaving my beloved Salford .... and living up where the accents are strange. And you think that the Salford accent ISN'T strange!!! |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Scrump Date: 06 Mar 07 - 12:10 PM You'll have a great time at the Bridge, Dave - say hello to your namesake there (the guy wot runs it). |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: GUEST,Mr Red Date: 07 Mar 07 - 08:29 AM "Newkee Brown" - calling it loopy brew - Ok then? |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: jiva Date: 07 Mar 07 - 10:56 AM ABCFor more info on local venues you could try the Venues page of our website. As well as reviews of places we've played (including contact details, smoking policy, format, etc) there are links to other sources of local info. Cheers Jimmy & Val (jiva) www.jiva.co.uk |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Scrump Date: 07 Mar 07 - 11:22 AM I've learnt "Wor Geordie's lost 'is penker doon the double rah" That'll go down a storm at the Bridge Dave :-) |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: A Wandering Minstrel Date: 08 Mar 07 - 08:14 AM No, "Loopy Brew" isn't right either, the correct appellation is: Gizzabroonpet! (though it may be wise to check the gender of the server first in case it should be Gizzabroonjack!) :) |
|
Subject: RE: BS: How does one become a Geordie then? From: Alec Date: 08 Mar 07 - 08:41 AM Ads at bottom of this thread currently read:"Problem accent? Learn to speak clearly correctly and confidently" and "Accent Reduction Pronunciation software and live instruction by a speech pathologist" Try as I might I am simply unable to figure out the relevance of these ads to the subject of this particular thread. |
