Lyr Req: The Stuttering Bum ("Jehosaphat & Jones")

Subject: Stuttering bum
From: Al McCauley
Date: 28 Mar 99 - 07:39 AM

Can anybody provide me with the lyrics of a funny song called "stuttering bum". All help very much appreciated. best regards, Al

Subject: Lyrics to song called Stuttering bum
From:
Date: 03 Apr 99 - 09:52 AM

Subject: RE: Stuttering bum
From: AlistairUK
Date: 05 Apr 99 - 06:28 AM

My bum normally stutters after a plate of beans.

Subject: RE: Stuttering bum
From: GUEST
Date: 02 Jun 09 - 12:05 PM

They are in Ronnie Barkers Book "All I Ever Wrote" - great song!!!
I got it from the local library who had 3 copies

Subject: RE: Stuttering bum
From: Leadfingers
Date: 02 Jun 09 - 12:58 PM

There is a U Tube !

Subject: RE: Stuttering bum
From: GUEST,Tom Collins
Date: 16 Jun 09 - 01:40 PM

i have a copy of brendan grace singing this song email me your address and i can email the track to you
Cheers
TC

Subject: Lyr Add: THE STUTTERING BUM
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 19 Jun 09 - 02:38 PM

Here's my partial transcription from the video that Leadfingers linked to. This version is by no means authoritative; I found other versions that differed considerably from this one, but they'd be much harder to transcribe.


STUTTERING BUM
As sung by Roy West(?)

1. ...(?) I'm a-callin' you up on the telephone
To say thanks for comin' to the dance with I. Let me walk you home.
I'm sorry I sounded so nervous, but I started to stammer and sweat,
And it started the day that I saw you and I ain't got over it yet.

CHORUS: I smile at those b-b-b-beau-beautiful blue-green eyes,
And I wonder if you f-f-f-flirted with other guys.
When you smiled, I nearly sh-sh-shot right out the door,
'Cause I ain't never seen such pretty little(?) t-t-t-t-teeth before.

2. She said she'd see I Saturday, and I put down the phone.
My voice is back to normal now; I'm once more alone.
But the next time that I sees her, Saturday night around ten,
You can bet your bottom dollar I'll be a stutterin' bum again.

3. Now I've never been a b-b-bashful boy(?); been out with other girls.
I've grabbed 'em by the b-b-backdoor fence and promised to be bold(?).
But the next time that I sees her, on the Dartmouth Valley ride,
You can bet your Devon dumplin' my tongue'll be perpetually tied.

4. I grabbed her by the b-b-barn door and pushed her inside,
And I took my ...(?) and asked her to be my bride,
And then she took my clammy hand and told me that she would,
So I'm gonna fetch the vicar right away and it'll ...(?) put her in the good.

LAST CHORUS ENDS: 'Cause I ain't never seen such pretty little(?) t-t-t-t-...
'Cause I ain't never seen such pretty little(?) t-t-t-t-...
'Cause I ain't never seen such pretty little(?) t-t-t-t-tits before.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Stuttering Bum
From: mc glumfer
Date: 06 Aug 09 - 12:01 PM

could you email me the copy of brendan grace singing the stuttering bum.
ps video on utube of first appearance jim& fat belly first performance
cheers mc glumfer

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Stuttering Bum
From: Q (Frank Staplin)
Date: 06 Aug 09 - 02:11 PM

Walter Jones, who played the role of "Charles Tatters" (very ragged suit) sang the "Stuttering Song" by L. F. Gottschalk, 1894, in the production "1492."
It's a comparable song, not the same one, and may have been the inspiration for the "Stuttering Bum."
See Levy Collection for sheet music.
https://scholarship.library.jhu.edu/handle/1774.2/9113

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Stuttering Bum
From: GUEST,Louise
Date: 13 Aug 09 - 06:36 AM

Hi Tom just saw that you have a copy of the stuttering bum, i've been lookin for a copy for ages as I lost the copy I had, would you mind sending it 2 me if I gave u my email address please?

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Stuttering Bum
From: autoharper
Date: 13 Aug 09 - 02:17 PM

It's not in George Milburn's "Hobo's Hornbook" 1930.
-Adam Miller

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Stuttering Bum
From: Curious Clouseau
Date: 14 Aug 09 - 09:19 AM

The song was written and performed by Ronnie barker on the Two Ronnies Show. He and Ronnie Corbett performed this song and other humours Hillbilly style songs as the characters Jehosophat & Jones. Some of these songs were released on an LP in 1974/75.

Subject: Lyr Add: THE STUTTERING BUM (from Ronnie Barker)
From: GUEST,Robin
Date: 20 Sep 09 - 06:07 AM

Here are the lyrics from the Ronnie Barker version, as best as I've been able to hear them.

THE STUTTERING BUM
(from Ronnie Barker)

Mary-Lou, I'm a-calling you up on the telephone
To say thanks for coming to the dance with me and letting me take you home.
I'm sorry I seemed so nervous and started to stammer and sweat,
But it s-started as s-soon as I saw you, and I ain't got over it yet.

I stared at your great big b-b-b-b-b-beautiful blue-green eyes,
I wondered if you f-f-f-f-f-flirted with all the guys.
When you smiled at me, I nearly sh-sh-sh-sh-sh-shot right out the door,
'Cause I'd never seen such pretty little t-t-t-t-t-teeth before.

I ain't usually a bashful boy, I've took out other gals.
I've kissed them on the b-b-b-b-b-back door step and p-p-p-p-promised to be pals,
But since I first caught sight of you on the Brownsville Buggy Ride,
Why, I've become a s-s-stuttering bum and my tongue's perpetually t-tied.

My c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-collar gets awful tight,
When I f-f-f-fear(?) it grows as I did last night,
I get a funny feeling in my b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-brain,
And I can't ????, just gotta see you again.

She said she'd see me Saturday, and I put down the phone.
My tongue is back to normal now, and I'm off once more alone.
But next time that I meet her, on Saturday night around ten,
You can b-bet your b-bottom dollar I'll be a stuttering bum again.

I'll grab her by the b-b-b-b-b-barn and p-p-push her inside.
I'll take my c-c-c-courage in both hands and ask her to be my b-bride.
And if she holds my c-c-c-clammy hand and tells me that she would,
I'll f-f-f-f-fetch a preacher right away, that'll cure my stutter for good.

That's good! That's g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-good!

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Stuttering Bum ("Jehosaphat & Jones")
From: GUEST,help the aged
Date: 16 Feb 10 - 11:30 AM

can anyone help i would like the cd of Jehosaphat and jones

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Stuttering Bum ("Jehosaphat & Jones")
From: GUEST
Date: 11 Jun 13 - 07:50 AM

last part with the ???s removed.
--------------
My c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-collar gets awful tight,
When I f-f-f-fear(?) it grows as I did last night,
I get a funny feeling in my b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-brain,
And I can't say the words b-b-b-b-b-b but I just gotta see you again.