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BS: Canonical Bulls, any jokes?

04 Apr 07 - 01:50 PM (#2016343)
Subject: BS: Canonical Bulls, any jokes?
From: frogprince

You know, like proclaimations by the Pope.
(Lord, let it end here..)


04 Apr 07 - 01:51 PM (#2016346)
Subject: RE: BS: Canonical Bulls, any jokes?
From: gnu

Does the Pope smoke dope?


04 Apr 07 - 01:52 PM (#2016347)
Subject: RE: BS: Canonical Bulls, any jokes?
From: KB in Iowa

Does the Pope sh*t in the woods?


04 Apr 07 - 04:49 PM (#2016498)
Subject: RE: BS: Canonical Bulls, any jokes?
From: Michael

KB; If so are bears Catholic?


04 Apr 07 - 04:53 PM (#2016505)
Subject: RE: BS: Canonical Bulls, any jokes?
From: Herga Kitty

I've never seen a Papal cow
With grief my heart is full
For I've never seen a Papal cow
And I'm.....


04 Apr 07 - 06:06 PM (#2016570)
Subject: RE: BS: Canonical Bulls, any jokes?
From: Amos

The world is too much with us;
Of woe the world is full.
There's quite too much of lay B.S.
As well as Papal bull.

A


04 Apr 07 - 09:21 PM (#2016815)
Subject: RE: BS: Canonical Bulls, any jokes?
From: Gulliver

I never saw a Canonical Bull,
I never hope to see one;
But I can tell you, though I'm dull,
I'd rather see than be one.


04 Apr 07 - 09:21 PM (#2016816)
Subject: RE: BS: Canonical Bulls, any jokes?
From: Rapparee

Papal bull? You want papal bull?

His Holiness the Pope, Bishop of Rome and Vicar of Jesus Christ, Successor of Saint Peter, Prince of the Apostles, Supreme Pontiff of the Universal Church, Pariarch of the West, Primate of Italy, Archbishipe and Metropolitan of the Roman Province, Sovereign of the State of the Vatican City.

That's the whole deal, in English. You really should, if using it as an address, do it in Latin.


04 Apr 07 - 10:28 PM (#2016877)
Subject: RE: BS: Canonical Bulls, any jokes?
From: Skivee

These two popes walk into a pub with parrots on their shoulders, then...
There were two popes and a rabbi fishing and...errr...
The pope, Henry Kissenger, Bill Gates and a hippy are on a plane. one of the engines sputtered and dies. Bill Gates grabs the hippy's backback and...some crap happens.
Sorry, I just can't remember when the bull shows up in these gags.


04 Apr 07 - 11:45 PM (#2016919)
Subject: RE: BS: Canonical Bulls, any jokes?
From: Don Firth

An ordinary bull is probably a virgin. A papal bull has fathered at least one calf.

Don Firth


05 Apr 07 - 12:48 AM (#2016941)
Subject: RE: BS: Canonical Bulls, any jokes?
From: Joe Offer

Is the Pope Italian?
(a joke from my youth)

-Joe-


05 Apr 07 - 03:47 AM (#2017004)
Subject: RE: BS: Canonical Bulls, any jokes?
From: Liz the Squeak

At the investiture of a new Pope there's always a ceremony involving the Chief Rabbi at the time. During the ceremony, the Pope hands the Rabbi an ancient piece of parchment. The Rabbi opens it, reads it and hands it back to the Pope, shaking his head. A newly ordained cardinal got curious about this and asked one of the Pope's advisors what was on the parchment.

'Ah my son, it is the bill for the Last Supper, no one will pay it!'

LTS


05 Apr 07 - 08:37 AM (#2017141)
Subject: RE: BS: Canonical Bulls, any jokes?
From: Rapparee

Lots of American Catholics think that a Papal Bull is a bum steer.


05 Apr 07 - 09:08 AM (#2017167)
Subject: RE: BS: Canonical Bulls, any jokes?
From: Charley Noble

At the risk of horning in on this Papal BS thread, I'd just like to say:

The pope he leads a jolly life, jolly life;
It's free from every care and strife, care and strife.
He drinks the best of Rhenish wine --
I wish the poe's gay life were mine!

Or if you prefer this in the original German:

Der Papst lebt herrlich in der Welt,
er lebt von seinen Ablassgeld,
er trint den allerbesten Wein;
ich möchte gern der Papst mal sein.

Cheerily,
Charley Noble


05 Apr 07 - 11:19 AM (#2017303)
Subject: RE: BS: Canonical Bulls, any jokes?
From: GUEST,Joan Pope

This Papal Bull was a good joke:

Ad extirpanda is the papal bull issued on May 15, 1252, by Pope Innocent IV. It explicitly authorized the use of torture for eliciting confessions from heretics during the Inquisition and explicitly condoned the practice of executing relapsed heretics by burning them alive. The bull conceded to the State a portion of the property to be confiscated from convicted heretics. The State in return assumed the burden of carrying out the penalty.

You should have heard Jesus laugh when he heard it!


05 Apr 07 - 04:19 PM (#2017634)
Subject: RE: BS: Canonical Bulls, any jokes?
From: Charley Noble

Not very nice or even funny, Joan Pope.

Couldn't they have been satisfied with just frailing the heretics with wet noddles?

Charley Noble


05 Apr 07 - 07:10 PM (#2017772)
Subject: RE: BS: Canonical Bulls, any jokes?
From: frogprince

What idiot started this thread, anyhow? I can't believe it's lasted this long.


05 Apr 07 - 09:22 PM (#2017911)
Subject: RE: BS: Canonical Bulls, any jokes?
From: Charley Noble

Rivit!!!!

I at least added a musical contribution (which no one acknowledged).

Charley Noble


05 Apr 07 - 09:41 PM (#2017919)
Subject: RE: BS: Canonical Bulls, any jokes?
From: Rapparee

Ya want I should post "The Vatican Rag" or somethin'?


06 Apr 07 - 09:00 AM (#2018182)
Subject: RE: BS: Canonical Bulls, any jokes?
From: Charley Noble

There was a friar in our town,
There was a friar in our town,
There was a friar in our town,
And he **** the women up and down,
And he **** the women up and down!

**** indicates a kind of popping sound the performer would make with his lips, or with a drum blow with his thumb to the top of his lute. My uncle thoroughly enjoyed performing this song at our family gatherings, late at night after we innocent ones were safe in bed.

Cheerily,
Charley Noble


06 Apr 07 - 09:24 AM (#2018196)
Subject: RE: BS: Canonical Bulls, any jokes?
From: *daylia*

Sorry, no rags allowed.


06 Apr 07 - 03:26 PM (#2018507)
Subject: RE: BS: Canonical Bulls, any jokes?
From: fat B****rd

"No, son. Let's walk down the hill and f**k all of them"


06 Apr 07 - 09:10 PM (#2018779)
Subject: RE: BS: Canonical Bulls, any jokes?
From: Charley Noble

fat B****rd-

I haven't heard that joke in years! It was a favorite of our old veterinarian.

"Let's run down and f**k some," says the son to the old bull, his father, looking at all the cows grazing in the valley below.

Cheerily,
Charley Noble


07 Apr 07 - 03:50 PM (#2019300)
Subject: RE: BS: Canonical Bulls, any jokes?
From: fat B****rd

Hello, Charley. I heard it from Robert Duvall in the film "Colours".