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BS: Whiskey-inspired epigrams

17 Apr 09 - 12:12 AM (#2612883)
Subject: BS: Whiskey-inspired epigrams
From: Lonesome EJ

The movie "Kill Bill" marks the ultimate victory of style over substance.


17 Apr 09 - 08:29 AM (#2613038)
Subject: RE: BS: Whiskey-inspired epigrams
From: Nigel Parsons

the ultimate victory of style over substance

I thought that was Tony Blair!


17 Apr 09 - 09:12 AM (#2613061)
Subject: RE: BS: Whiskey-inspired epigrams
From: Bill D

That epigram inspires ME to more whiskey....


17 Apr 09 - 02:22 PM (#2613277)
Subject: RE: BS: Whiskey-inspired epigrams
From: Richard Bridge

Spelt like that, the closest I get to an epigram is "bejabers".


17 Apr 09 - 03:16 PM (#2613317)
Subject: RE: BS: Whiskey-inspired epigrams
From: Bill D

'whisky' - 17,700,000 hits
'whiskey' -18,500,000 hits

The world is not always as we'd wish.

(and I spell 'spelt' as 'spelled' and 'bejabers' as 'bejabbers'....fascinating!)


17 Apr 09 - 03:21 PM (#2613324)
Subject: RE: BS: Whiskey-inspired epigrams
From: michaelr

"Always keep a bottle of whisky in your pocket in case of snakebite. Always keep a snake in the other pocket." - W.C. Fields


17 Apr 09 - 03:52 PM (#2613352)
Subject: RE: BS: Whiskey-inspired epigrams
From: katlaughing

So, Mae West should have said "Is that a bottle in your pocket and you are glad to see me?"


17 Apr 09 - 08:22 PM (#2613519)
Subject: RE: BS: Whiskey-inspired epigrams
From: John on the Sunset Coast

An epigram is a bon mot sent by Western Union; an epigraph is a saying sent by any other telegraph company. Hic.


17 Apr 09 - 08:30 PM (#2613525)
Subject: RE: BS: Whiskey-inspired epigrams
From: Joe_F

The graduations on a whiskey bottle:

- Jocose
- Morose
- Bellicose
- Comatose


18 Apr 09 - 03:29 PM (#2613996)
Subject: RE: BS: Whiskey-inspired epigrams
From: Jim Dixon

During one of our trips through Afghanistan, we lost our corkscrew. We had to live on food and water for several days.

--W. C. Fields (as Cuthbert J. Twillie in "My Little Chickadee", 1940)


19 Apr 09 - 12:32 AM (#2614222)
Subject: RE: BS: Whiskey-inspired epigrams
From: Lonesome EJ

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. It was the Spring of Hope, it was the Winter of Despair. It was the uncorking of a fifth of Woodford Reserve on Friday Night. It was stubbing your toe on an empty Kentucky Gentleman bottle on Saturday morning.


19 Apr 09 - 05:13 AM (#2614280)
Subject: RE: BS: Whiskey-inspired epigrams
From: John O'L

The iron curtain may have fallen but the iron drapes still frame the stage where puppeteers agree (in whispers off) that Punch should clobber Judy and then Judy clobber Punch.


19 Apr 09 - 08:01 AM (#2614330)
Subject: RE: BS: Whiskey-inspired epigrams
From: Acorn4

From Bernard Wrigley:-

I joined alcoholics anonymous.

I still get pissed but do it under another name!


19 Apr 09 - 08:30 AM (#2614340)
Subject: RE: BS: Whiskey-inspired epigrams
From: Dave the Gnome

I have a whisky bemired epiglottis. Will that do?

DeG


19 Apr 09 - 09:24 AM (#2614352)
Subject: RE: BS: Whiskey-inspired epigrams
From: bobad

Well I got a bad liver and broken heart, yeah,
I drunk me a river since you tore me apart
And I don't have a drinking problem, 'cept when I can't get a drink

Tom Waits


19 Apr 09 - 10:01 AM (#2614362)
Subject: RE: BS: Whiskey-inspired epigrams
From: Bill D

Lemme try this:

"A skunk sat on a stump.
The stump thunk the skunk stunk,
And the skunk thunk the stump stunk."

ok, bartender...I'm fine... gimme another whisky.


19 Apr 09 - 01:25 PM (#2614477)
Subject: RE: BS: Whiskey-inspired epigrams
From: Lonesome EJ

I have seen more of Heaven in the bottom of a wine glass than I have in any Church
- Omar Khayam

(well, in this case its wine, not whiskey...you get the picture)


19 Apr 09 - 01:34 PM (#2614480)
Subject: RE: BS: Whiskey-inspired epigrams
From: Jim Dixon

"I'd rather have a bottle in front o' me than a frontal lobotomy."

--I don't know if he originated it, but I first heard it from Tom Waits when he was a guest on "Fernwood 2 Night" in 1977.


19 Apr 09 - 07:46 PM (#2614689)
Subject: RE: BS: Whiskey-inspired epigrams
From: Joe_F

I'll eat when I'm hungry,
I'll drink when I'm dry.
If whiskey don't kill me,
I'll live till I die.

A logician, somewhere, once pointed out that the final statement is equivalent to "If I don't live till I die, whiskey will kill me".

(Posted under the influence of a manhattan.)


19 Apr 09 - 08:04 PM (#2614696)
Subject: RE: BS: Whiskey-inspired epigrams
From: Bill D

I always wondered how any of those scientists was able to finish the "Manhatten Project".


19 Apr 09 - 08:07 PM (#2614697)
Subject: RE: BS: Whiskey-inspired epigrams
From: Gurney

Lucky man, Lonesome. I can't even afford to buy wine by the case, let alone whisky.
That's good advice, 'let alone whisky,' by the way.