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BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly

18 Jun 09 - 01:51 PM (#2659519)
Subject: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Wesley S

PETA has some good points. But raising an objection because the President swats and kills a fly? That's just silly. And it dilutes the good messages and reforms they want to put forward. To the majority of people in the world it just makes them look like a bunch of idiots.

You might feel differently however.


18 Jun 09 - 01:56 PM (#2659522)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: john f weldon

If it wasn't for idiots I would have had a very short career. Thank you to idiots everywhere.

And thanks for an excuse to post this again:

Peta Gals


18 Jun 09 - 02:00 PM (#2659524)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: C. Ham

Thanks John. The video was LOL funny and I thought Obama was pretty cool in the way he handled the fly.


18 Jun 09 - 02:13 PM (#2659542)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: maire-aine

Did PETA really come out with a statement? or was that just a late-night comedian's joke???

M


18 Jun 09 - 02:21 PM (#2659547)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: jeffp

PETA apparently released a statement complaining that Obama is not the Buddha. They think he should have thought before he acted.


18 Jun 09 - 02:25 PM (#2659549)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: frogprince

Just when you think it can't get any sillier...


18 Jun 09 - 02:28 PM (#2659553)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Ebbie

But now People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, calling it an "execution," wants the commander-in-chief to show a little more compassion to even "the least sympathetic animals."
"Believe it or not, we've actually been contacted by multiple media outlets wanting to know PETA's official response to the executive insect execution," a blog on the group's website explained. "In a nutshell, our position is this: He isn't the Buddha, he's a human being, and human beings have a long way to go before they think before they act."
The group has sent Obama a device that traps a fly so it can then be released outside.
"We believe that people, where they can be compassionate, should be, for all animals," PETA spokesman Bruce Freidrich explained.


18 Jun 09 - 02:31 PM (#2659556)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Ebbie

For some strange reason the URL I posted for PETA didn't take- but here it is: PETA STORY LINK


18 Jun 09 - 02:40 PM (#2659563)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Wesley S

I think Obama DID think about it. Then he swated the fly. That SHOULD be the end of the story.


18 Jun 09 - 02:45 PM (#2659569)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: maire-aine

Seem to me like PETA has "jumped the shark" with this one.

Maryanne


18 Jun 09 - 02:49 PM (#2659570)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: C. Ham

I wonder if PETA types ever wash their bed sheets. Every time they do, they murder thousands of dust mites.


18 Jun 09 - 02:52 PM (#2659573)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Gervase

They really must sort out their PR - that sort of claptrap just plays into the hands of those who think they are a bunch of wankers.
I assume they don't use soap, antibiotics or any sort of cleanser that might kill bacteria...


18 Jun 09 - 02:53 PM (#2659574)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: bobad

I hope they don't find out about the mosquito I killed today.


18 Jun 09 - 03:17 PM (#2659593)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: john f weldon

Friends in New York tell me it is teeming with bedbugs these days. How lucky to live among so many of our six-legged cousins!


18 Jun 09 - 03:31 PM (#2659612)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Peace

1) "Beware of stupid people--in groups."

2) "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has limits."

3) "House flies ain't animals."


18 Jun 09 - 03:34 PM (#2659616)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Rifleman (inactive)

" those who think they are a bunch of wankers........"
they are and I thought so loooonnng before this yet another mountain out of a molehill


18 Jun 09 - 03:37 PM (#2659619)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: meself

No kiddin'. Some of you sound like everything they have done up to now has made sense ...


18 Jun 09 - 03:38 PM (#2659620)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Sorcha

Wankers, idiots, stupid...those are just the NICE names for them!


18 Jun 09 - 03:39 PM (#2659623)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Bee-dubya-ell

I assume the deceased animal in question was a common housefly. Houseflies do not want to be captured and released to the outside. They want to be inside your house. That's why they call them "houseflies" instead of "outdoorsflies".

The height of a housefly's ambition is to invade your house, feed on your decaying garbage, and transfer pathogens onto your furniture so you can transfer them into your own body, get sick, and die. In other words, the housefly wants to kill you. It wants to kill you so it can lay its eggs in your rotting flesh, thus giving its children (maggots) plenty of food and a nice warm place to stay until they're ready to perform their own home invasions.

Ayway, if there were no flyswatters, what the hell would redneck babies chew on while teething?


18 Jun 09 - 03:46 PM (#2659629)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Rapparee

In their 2007 Form 990, PETA states that they gave US $3,000,000 to the Foundation to Support Animal Activism (I think that's the name), which just happens to be located at 501 N. Front St., Norfolk, VA. That's also PETA's address. It was the largest single grant they made.


18 Jun 09 - 03:46 PM (#2659630)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: C. Ham

White Houseflies are the very elite of houseflies. But they still gotta be careful around a president with a good eye and quick swat.


18 Jun 09 - 03:46 PM (#2659631)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: frogprince

"I'm not hungry, momma; I just ate all the raisins off the sticky paper".


18 Jun 09 - 04:28 PM (#2659662)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Rapparee

PETA (which also spells TAPE and PATÉ and EATP) has been shooting off its mouth before loading its brain a lot lately.


18 Jun 09 - 04:30 PM (#2659665)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Peace

I wanna start an organization that will be just as worthy. I hope to call it

PETC

Anyone gonna join?


18 Jun 09 - 04:30 PM (#2659667)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: robomatic

I had some friends (of friends) who were not happy to learn I was using inhumane mouse traps to discourage the voles who moved in with me. They volunteered to give me human traps for 'em. I modulated my remarks when I found out they are campers who leave nothing on a trip to the outback. NOTHING. They pack EVERYTHING out.


18 Jun 09 - 04:32 PM (#2659669)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Rapparee

C. Cannibals? Canadians? Crematoriums? Communists? Czars? Chlymidia?


18 Jun 09 - 04:38 PM (#2659683)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Peace

Get serious, Rapaire. The organization I have in mind is





People for the Ethical Treatment of Crabs


18 Jun 09 - 04:39 PM (#2659684)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: jeffp

Critters?


18 Jun 09 - 04:39 PM (#2659685)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Rapparee

PETA runs spay and neuter clinics for cats and dogs. As a public service shouldn't they also run one for flies?


18 Jun 09 - 04:40 PM (#2659686)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Rapparee

They could neuter crabs, too.


18 Jun 09 - 04:45 PM (#2659692)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Peace

"I modulated my remarks when I found out they are campers who leave nothing on a trip to the outback. NOTHING. They pack EVERYTHING out."

I do that, too. However, rodents that want to move in--had a plague of deer mice once, and they are disease carriers--got the fast treatment.

I tried humane traps and got called away one time for a few days. Came home to find a barely living field mouse about to expire. He'd/she'd had no water for that long--since it got trapped. I felt so sorry for it I got it some water. It revived in about 20 minutes. I took it to a field about a mile away and released it. Since then, the old snap has been the one.


18 Jun 09 - 04:46 PM (#2659696)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Peace

Well, I suppose there might be a benefit to having just one crab. But, what would it be? I need some help to 'flesh out' this idea.


18 Jun 09 - 04:50 PM (#2659702)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Don Firth

I don't think that there are any comedians around who could think up something this incredibly stupid! So it has to be real.

Like . . . the fly is an endangered species?

So PETA is located in Virginia, eh? Is the housefly the Virginia State Bird or something??

Don Firth


18 Jun 09 - 04:56 PM (#2659708)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Becca72

PETA also euthanizes something like 86% of the animals they take in. They feel that it's more humane to kill them than to make them stay in shelters while waiting for a permanent home. These people are a bunch of morons. I don't trust any organization that lets Pam Anderson speak for them.


18 Jun 09 - 05:04 PM (#2659716)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Rapparee

So the President knew that that poor housefly would never find a home as a pet, so he euthanized it.


18 Jun 09 - 05:14 PM (#2659725)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Peace

Piss on you folks, then. Here I am tryna get an organization off the ground and what friggin' help do I get? CRABS have rights too, ya know.


18 Jun 09 - 05:16 PM (#2659731)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Peace

WHAT ABOUT HIS RIGHTS?


18 Jun 09 - 05:18 PM (#2659732)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Peace

or HERS


18 Jun 09 - 05:18 PM (#2659734)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Don Firth

Inquiring minds want to know.

Did he bury the fly with full military honors?

Did he wash his hands?

Don Firth


18 Jun 09 - 05:20 PM (#2659737)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Peace

or OURS. Have you people no hearts?


18 Jun 09 - 05:24 PM (#2659745)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Jeri

Peace, you've undoubtedly overdone the whole guilt thing about crabs and are doing penance. I think you've confessed to having killed millions of them. I think you must dream of zombie crabs coming to drag you and your nether regions into some as yet un-dreamed of circle of Hell (or maybe a rhombus of hell) that involves itching instead of burning, freezing or listening to Barry Manilow.

I feel pity for you. You and your false pro-crab righteousness.
FEH!


18 Jun 09 - 05:26 PM (#2659747)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Lonesome EJ

From Annie Hall I believe. Annie has asked Woody Allen's character to come to her apartment because there is a spider in the bathtub. As he prepares to swat it with a rolled up newspaper, she pleads "don't kill it!"
And he replies "what do you want me to do, capture it and rehabilitate it?"
One of my favorite lines. God save us all from zealots of all stripe.


18 Jun 09 - 05:27 PM (#2659749)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Peace

I object most strenuously to the heartless lady from Maine's statement. I killed perhaps ten to fifteen thousand crabs, but I was only following label directions.


18 Jun 09 - 05:34 PM (#2659755)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Mice caught in "humane" traps and released will either find their way back to your house, or find their way to somebody else's house. Once they've learned to associate human habitation with food, there's no going back to scrounging through leaf litter looking for whatever the squirrels haven't found.

You can make pets out of 'em, or you can kill 'em. Relocation just doesn't work.


18 Jun 09 - 05:39 PM (#2659760)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Little Hawk

I used to catch flies live with one hand. It required careful stalking, positioning the hand just ahead of the fly wherever he was sitting, then a sudden sweeping grab. The fly MUST move slightly forward as he takes off. If you're fast enough, the fly ends up enclosed but unharmed inside your closed fist.

I would then feed the little rascal to my pet chameleons by putting him in their cage. ;-) They will only eat live food.

So let's see if PETA gets upset about that too...and if they do?

TOO F-in' BAD!!! ;-) Bite me, PETA!


18 Jun 09 - 05:59 PM (#2659773)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Jeri

Wrong state, Mr Kanadian Krab Killer.

(I didn't know the ice pick and the flame thrower came with labels!)

I had a chameleon that used to keep the stupid flies for pets. Starved to death. Personally, I usually take the big spiders outside and let them go. Their chance of survival greatly increases based on how big a splat they'll make if I smoosh them. I used to be a little arachnophobic, but I can deal with the little 8 eyed darlings now.

The thing PETA have got to figure out is when they need to stop being offended so that people don't laugh at them. Then again, where would be the fun in that?


18 Jun 09 - 05:59 PM (#2659774)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Cool Beans

I was going to post the words to "Never Swat a Fly" (1930) but they're nowhere to be found on Mudcat. Let's see what I can remember...

Never swat a fly
He may have another fly
He may sit with her and sigh
The way I do with you.

Never harm a flea
He may have a favorite she
That he bounces on his knee
The way I do with you.

Never harm a bee if he is going anywhere
You may be concluding some terrific insect love affair.
Be careful.

Don't step on an ant
In the middle of a plant
He may want to but he can't
The way I do with you.


18 Jun 09 - 06:07 PM (#2659778)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Don Firth

Anybody see the "The Fly"—that is, the original one in 1958, with Vincent Price? No, not the 1986 remake with Jeff Goldblum.

I can't help but keep hearing that teeny, tiny, high pitched little voice crying

Help me! Help me! Please! Help me!

CLICKY. And move the slider up to 5:00 for the relevant part.

Don Firth


18 Jun 09 - 06:14 PM (#2659780)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: GUEST,beardedbruce

Cool Beans,

I think these are the lyrics you are looking for:


Never swat a fly, he may love another fly
He may sit with her and sigh the way I do with you
Never harm a flea, he may have a favourite she
That he bounces on his knee the way I do with you
Never stop a moth when he is gliding through the air
He may have a date in someone's flannel underware
Ah ah be carefull
Never spray a nit with a great big can of blitz
He may think some nit has it the way I do with you


18 Jun 09 - 06:18 PM (#2659785)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Peace

OK. I give up. It's easy to see that PETC will never take off. So much for "support on Mudcat". Bah. Humbug.


18 Jun 09 - 07:06 PM (#2659826)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Rapparee

I just wanted to know what the "C" was for.

PETC beats the others cold,
PETC pours it on.


PETC-cola's up to date
With modern folks who want to mate
We've made it light and dry for you,
Refleshs without killing, too!


18 Jun 09 - 07:09 PM (#2659829)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Peace

Too late now, Rapaire. My dream is crushed.


18 Jun 09 - 07:39 PM (#2659855)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Leadfingers

In UK we have Animal Liberation Front - If you think PETA are loonies . try the clots who released a few hundred MINK into the wild !!


18 Jun 09 - 07:40 PM (#2659857)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: frogprince

By the way, Peace: you identified those two crabs above as a male and a female; congratulations, you must have incredible eyesight. I thought a friend was good who said he could identify male moths by their little mothballs.


18 Jun 09 - 07:49 PM (#2659870)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Bobert

Well, that's the last straw fir this ol' hillbilly...

Next time around I'll go with Sarah Palin...

(But, Bobert, she kills mooses...)

Anyone have piccures??? If not, it's Palin in '12...

B~


18 Jun 09 - 09:33 PM (#2659923)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Ron Davies

I can just hear the sighs of relief coming from Jon Stewart, Letterman etc.   As long as PETA and like groups are around they need never worry about material. Wonder if this will be a long-running gag.


18 Jun 09 - 10:23 PM (#2659939)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Bill D

reposting from a long ago thread:

"many years ago, I knew a woman who considered herself to be a 'Buhddist'...but was really trying to practice 'Jainism', which teaches reverence for all life..she even worried about eating eggs, and had to be sure they were unfertilized.....

well, she was noticed one day scooping up cockroaches in her kitchen,and, since she would not squash them or spray them, tossing them outside----into below freezing temperatures!

"All I'm doing is getting them out of my house", she said,"what God does with them after that is not my concern"......

my, the human mind can certainly create any rules it needs to justify whatever it feels like doing "


18 Jun 09 - 11:53 PM (#2659958)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Rapparee

If it tries to feed on ME while I'm still alive I'm going to try to kill it, or at least make it go away.

Then again, I don't want Obama or anyone else taking a swat at my fly.


19 Jun 09 - 02:34 AM (#2659993)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Peace

I wrote to PETA to ask if this was true. Haven't heard back. Likely won't. I suggested--no, I said, "If it's true, then the fellow who said that should be let out alone." I'll let y'all know.

Now, one more time.

I'm attempting to start an organization entitled PETBL. I don't need any nay sayers getting all wiseguy about it. This is a serious attempt on my part to emulate PETA and do something good for the treatment of creatures on this Earth. NOW, who's with me?


19 Jun 09 - 05:49 AM (#2660050)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: gnu

People for the eating of tastey boiled lobsters? I'm in!


19 Jun 09 - 09:22 AM (#2660150)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Rapparee

I'll join yours if you'll join mine: PETP.


19 Jun 09 - 09:42 AM (#2660160)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Jeri

I'm not saying anything. I felt terrible after the dream-crushing of last night.

So you starting a catch-and-release program with you as the sanctuary? Are you writing a protest song? I can see the posters now: Say 'hello' to my leetle friends!

Don't you grumble
Don't you grouse
My best friend is a body louse
Oh babe, you better believe it's true
He's always here, even if he ain't as fun as you.

Take him for a walk
Don't need a leash, he's
From a homophilic species
Babe, you better believe it's true
He's always here, if he ain't as much fun as you

Don't you wash and don't you scratch
You might kill his babies before they hatch
...etc


19 Jun 09 - 10:26 AM (#2660189)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Crabs: A Haiku

Genitalia
With crab lice infestation
Scratch, scratch, scratch, scratch, scratch


19 Jun 09 - 03:29 PM (#2660409)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Rapparee

Are Crabs Haiku anything like Crab Rangoon?


19 Jun 09 - 03:58 PM (#2660430)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: GUEST,Neil D

I'm attempting to start an organization entitled PETBL. I don't need any nay sayers getting all wiseguy about it. This is a serious attempt on my part to emulate PETA and do something good for the treatment of creatures on this Earth. NOW, who's with me?

People for the Ethical Treatment of
Baba Looey?
That's cool by me, Bruce.

From: Rapaire
Date: 19 Jun 09 - 09:22 AM

I'll join yours if you'll join mine: PETP.

People for the Ethical Treatment of People? I'll join.


19 Jun 09 - 04:16 PM (#2660440)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Yes, Crabs Haiku are a lot like Crab Rangoon. Just substitute Kwell Ointment for the cream cheese.


19 Jun 09 - 04:28 PM (#2660447)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: jeddy

hey bruce i will joinbut only if you post some posters that i can put in my window!!!!i am sure your' group will take over the world!!!!

peta are complete idiots over this, i wonder if they flea or worm their dogs and cats?
which would be worse, killing the fleas ticks and worms or having to pay the vet bills ehen your' pet gets really ill?

i'm glad you mentioned the mink leadfingers, they had no idea that they would destroy everthing they came accross, what kind of moron plans a rescue mission and doen't research what they are rescuing!!!

i did'nt know that peta put down alot of dogs if this is true then that is somewhat out of order.

i rescue spiders but have great fun hunting down the pesky flies, when they go too high so the dogs can't get them, in the caravan however the dogs are very successful, maybe we should be reported!!!

take care all

and please remember that all life is sacred, we should not be so glib about murder, now where is that fly swat????

jade x x


19 Jun 09 - 04:33 PM (#2660449)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Rapparee

Do some research, Jeddy. PETA is a bunch of hypocrites.


19 Jun 09 - 06:37 PM (#2660531)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: jeddy

i have always thought that they were well respected.
thankyou for bringing this to my attention, i will look into it

take acre all
jade x x


19 Jun 09 - 07:03 PM (#2660542)
Subject: Lyr Add: NEVER SWAT A FLY
From: pdq

Never Swat A Fly

Never swat a fly
He may love another fly
He may sit with her and sigh the way I do, with you

Never harm a flea
He may have a favourite she
That he bounces on his knee the way I do, with you

Never stop a bee if he is going anywhere
You may be concluding some terrific love affair.
Be careful!

Don't step on an ant
In the middle of a pant
He may want to but he can't the way I do, with you


19 Jun 09 - 07:21 PM (#2660557)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: gnu

Splat!
Oops.
PETA that!

A short poem by gnu.
If you don't like it,
Guess who.


19 Jun 09 - 11:10 PM (#2660662)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Charley Noble

As I posted on a related thread:

Well, it's a good thing that Obama did not swallow that fly, or we'd be composing a commemorative ditty.

I know a President who swatted a fly,
Oh, my, he swatted a fly ––
The fly died!

Short ditty, long story!

Charley Noble


20 Jun 09 - 01:45 AM (#2660708)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: bseed(charleskratz)

Here are three poets' views of the fly:


Ogden Nash

The Fly

God in his wisdom made the fly
And then forgot to tell us why.




William Blake

The Fly

Little Fly,
Thy summer's play
My thoughtless hand
Has brushed away.

Am not I
A fly like thee?
Or art not thou
A man like me?

For I dance
And drink, and sing,
Till some blind hand
Shall brush my wing.

If thought is life
And strength and breath
And the want
Of thought is death;

Then am I
A happy fly,
If I live,
Or if I die.


KARL SHAPIRO

The Fly

O hideous little bat, the size of snot,
With polyhedral eye and shabby clothes,
To populate the stinking cat you walk
The promontory of the dead man's nose,
Climb with the fine leg of a Duncan-Phyfe
   The smoking mountains of my food
      And in a comic mood
   In mid-air take to bed a wife.

Riding and riding with your filth of hair
On gluey foot or wing, forever coy,
Hot from the compost and green sweet decay,
Sounding your buzzer like an urchin toy—
You dot all whiteness with diminutive stool,
   In the tight belly of the dead
      Burrow with hungry head
   And inlay maggots like a jewel.

At your approach the great horse stomps and paws
Bringing the hurricane of his heavy tail;
Shod in disease you dare to kiss my hand
Which sweeps against you like an angry flail;
Still you return, return, trusting your wing
   To draw you from the hunter's reach
      That learns to kill to teach
   Disorder to the tinier thing.

My peace is your disaster. For your death
Children like spiders cup their pretty hands
And wives resort to chemistry of war.
In fens of sticky paper and quicksands
You glue yourself to death. Where you are stuck
   You struggle hideously and beg,
      You amputate your leg
   Imbedded in the amber muck.

But I, a man, must swat you with my hate,
Slap you across the air and crush your flight,
Must mangle with my shoe and smear your blood,
Expose your little guts pasty and white,
Knock your head sidewise like a drunkard's hat,
   Pin your wings under like a crow's,
      Tear off your flimsy clothes
   And beat you as one beats a rat.

Then like Gargantua I stride among
The corpses strewn like raisins in the dust,
The broken bodies of the narrow dead
That catch the throat with fingers of disgust.
I sweep. One gyrates like a top and falls
   And stunned, stone blind, and deaf
      Buzzes its frightful F
   And dies between three cannibals.


Charles


20 Jun 09 - 10:53 AM (#2660888)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Rapparee

Flies are good. I like the Royal Coachman when you don't know what the hatch is. Poppers and spinners are good too, as are spoons. Sometimes I rig a spoon or a spinners with some bacon rind, or salmon eggs. But for a REALLY good time, you can't beat minnows or worms or best of all, good old home-made stinkbait.

I like to make stinkbait out of old raw liver, limburger cheese (if I can get it, otherwise some super-sharp cheddar will do as a distant second), and a drop of rancid fish oil. Put in enough flour of thicken it up good, knead it all together well, and leave it out in the sun for a couple days before using it. Don't open the container in the house or, perhaps especially, in the bar.


20 Jun 09 - 11:17 AM (#2660900)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Charley Noble

I do like the Karl Shipiro ditty! Thanks for posting it.

This little Victorian ditty came from Songs for the Little Ones at Home, © 1852, p. 25-26:

'Twas God who made the little fly;
But if you pinch it, it will die!
My mother tells me, God has said
We must not hurt what God had made;
For God is very kind and good,
And gives e'en little flies their food;
And he loves every little child,
Who is kind-hearted, good, and mild.

It's a songbook with a great many such "treasures."

Cheerily,
Charley Noble


20 Jun 09 - 11:53 AM (#2660926)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Bee-dubya-ell

If it was God who made the fly,
Intelligent Design's a lie.

A fly is most unsanitary.
Who knows what ills a fly can carry?
A fly can take a dread disease
And spread it among Man with ease.

So, if Man holds a special station,
The pinnacle of God's Creation,
Then why, oh why, would God on high
Create the fly to make Man die?


20 Jun 09 - 12:00 PM (#2660927)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Ebbie

Checks and balances, perhaps?


20 Jun 09 - 12:04 PM (#2660931)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Leadfingers

Little Fly upon the wall
Have you got no clothes at all ?
Have you got no mom or dad ?
Fly Bastard ! SPLAT !


20 Jun 09 - 03:34 PM (#2661062)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Peace

True story.

Years back when I was living in Edmonton, a housefly was buzzing around but not landing on food at the kitchen table or me. So, I decided--in a Zen moment (I was heavy into a martial art at the time)--to leave him alone if he left me alone. He did very well. Lasted for three days. On the third day something possessed him, and in the words of Jack Higgens, I said, "The Eagle Has Landed". However, I decided that it would insult the 'dignity' of death to kill him with anything less than a front kick, and so began the saga that lasted another two days. On day six of his brief yet shelterd life in that apartment he landed on the wall and I unleashed a kick of devastating power and lightning speed. He died. I had to then repair a hole in the drywall. It took about three weeks before my toe healed enough that I could walk without limping badly.

The next day at class, my Korean master inquired what had happened to my toe. I told him the brief story I related above. He nodded his head. The following day he called me over after class and gave me a small package. He presented it to me with a slight bow. I bowed deeper and left. I was quite excited and I opened it on the bus. It was a can of Raid.

The End


20 Jun 09 - 03:46 PM (#2661071)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: jacqui.c

LOL Peace.


20 Jun 09 - 04:27 PM (#2661096)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: bseed(charleskratz)

Ditty?

Charley, that's exalted odic poetry--sublime in form, gripping in imagery, a startling unity of subject and theme from the opening line to the final grisly stanza it is as perfect as its subject is disturbing.

Charles


20 Jun 09 - 04:34 PM (#2661098)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: jeddy

peace you crack me up!!!   pmsl

take care

your freind always

jade x x


20 Jun 09 - 04:38 PM (#2661099)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Don Firth

Great, Peace!! I gotta pass that along. That's too good!!

Don Firth


20 Jun 09 - 10:44 PM (#2661259)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Charley Noble

Charles-

You wouldn't believe the songs included in Songs for the Little Ones at Home. There's one about the mother who feeds her baby to the crocodile, and if we'd only send the bible there pronto she'd spare the little tyke:

Send, oh, send the bible there,
Let its precepts reach the heart;
She man then her children spare,
Act the mother's tender part!

Now that's a disturbing image!

Charley Noble


21 Jun 09 - 10:59 AM (#2661458)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Rapparee

I like "Ruthless Rhymes For Heartless Homes":

Willy, with a taste for gore,
Nailed his sister to the floor.
Mother said, with humor quaint,
"Careful Will, don't spoil the paint."

or

Into the well
That the plumber built her
Aunt Eliza fell.
We must buy a filter.


21 Jun 09 - 11:35 AM (#2661480)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Ebbie

"Daddy, why can't I go out and play like everyone else?"

"Shut up and deal!"


21 Jun 09 - 12:21 PM (#2661503)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Rapparee

"Mrs Jones, Mrs Jones! Can Bobby come out and play baseball?"
"Now, you boys know he doesn't have any arms or legs."
"Yes'm, but we want him for first base."


21 Jun 09 - 12:28 PM (#2661511)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Rapparee

"Tommy, did you and Daddy have a good time while I gone?"
"Oh yes, Mommy! Daddy took me swimming in the lake every day!"
"Really? You're pretty little. Wasn't that hard?"
"No, Mommy, not after I'd get out of the sack."


21 Jun 09 - 05:47 PM (#2661714)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Charley Noble

Rapaire-

Very true but these are contemporary verses. Songs for the Little Ones at Home is sequestered in the early Victorian period, which gives it its own special edge.

Charley Noble


21 Jun 09 - 08:20 PM (#2661792)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Rapparee

My copy of "Ruthless Rhymes" is a reprint, but the original American publication date is 1901, the first edition (English) was 1899. It's been published several times since and, I suspect, some verses added.


21 Jun 09 - 09:43 PM (#2661819)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: open mike

the early bird gets the worm
but the second mouse gets the cheese


21 Jun 09 - 10:08 PM (#2661834)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Rapparee

Young bull, standing on a hillside looking at herd of cows below: "Let's run down a do a couple of those cows!"

Old bull, standing next to him: "Let's WALK down and do ALL the cows."


21 Jun 09 - 11:46 PM (#2661884)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Rapparee

If I get a chance I'll dig out some of the god-awful stuff I inherited from my great-great-Aunt Tilly.


22 Jun 09 - 12:39 PM (#2662173)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Cool Beans

Lenny Bruce used to do a riff on flies. People always complain, he would say, that flies carry disease. My sister gave two guys the clap and nobody hit her with a rolled-up newspaper.


22 Jun 09 - 03:54 PM (#2662299)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: gnu

Rapaire... on The Mighty Miramichi, the Green Machine rules.


22 Jun 09 - 03:59 PM (#2662302)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: gnu

Now, Ted Williams gave me a Brown Bomber in low, hot water, but I can't find a good pic of it. This comes close. But, there was no reddish on his. It was Whitetail tail. And, the hook size was larger.

Worked well, but I never hooked a grilse on it.


22 Jun 09 - 06:42 PM (#2662411)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Rapparee

Well, of course not. To hook girls you need things besides a hook and some fuzzy stuff. Maybe dinner, a show, some drinks afterwards....

(Your spelling needs work, man.)


22 Jun 09 - 07:01 PM (#2662432)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Don(Wyziwyg)T

It's a vile slander. This is not Geedubya Warmonger we're talking about.

That nice Barack Obama simply used his far superior hand eye co-ordination (those who've seen GW stumbling around know what I mean)to knock the little bastard unconscious long enough to complete the interview without interruption.

Simple good manners really.

I saw the TV close-up of that fly, and it was definitely still breathing.

Don T.


22 Jun 09 - 07:16 PM (#2662442)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Peace

Don is correct. The fly then flew away when the cameras were turned off. In fact, a friend of mine sent me this picture of that VERY SAME FLY which landed on the roof of his house in a location that will remain unnamed. The still-living fly that was barely touched by President Obama. The veracity of that picture was sworn and attested to by four guys I know named Dave, Alan, Leroy and Wu.


22 Jun 09 - 08:01 PM (#2662466)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Leadfingers

100


22 Jun 09 - 08:04 PM (#2662467)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Peace

Well, I'd better be honest about it. There were just three guys. Wu is me.


22 Jun 09 - 08:08 PM (#2662472)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Leadfingers

Though I'm not sure why I bothered


22 Jun 09 - 08:10 PM (#2662476)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: jeddy

hardly a superior trick even i could hit that bugger!!!

if it landed on me it would crush me, that thing is taller than i am!!

well, being 5 ft it wouldn't be hard for anything to be taller than me lol


jade x x


23 Jun 09 - 10:05 AM (#2662644)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Charley Noble

And the black flies, the little black flies
Always the black fly no matter where you go;
I'll die with the black fly a-pickin' on my bones
In North Ontario, io, in North Ontario.


Cheerily,
Charley Noble


23 Jun 09 - 03:01 PM (#2662893)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Rapparee

Maybe we could send PETA to North Ontario....


23 Jun 09 - 08:04 PM (#2663168)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Don(Wyziwyg)T

""And the black flies, the little black flies
Always the black fly no matter where you go;
I'll die with the black fly a-pickin' on my bones
In North Ontario, io, in North Ontario.

Cheerily,
Charley Noble
""

Try the Scottish midges Charley. About the size of a DC9, with a bite like a Rottweiler.

Don T.


23 Jun 09 - 08:52 PM (#2663189)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Charley Noble

Don-

Black flies are little but they make up for their size in terms of voraciousness.

Now in Maine we also have the moose flies. You don't even want to know what one of those could do to you. DC9 indeed!

Cheerily,
Charley Noble


23 Jun 09 - 08:55 PM (#2663193)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: GUEST,Peace

A lucky shot brought down this moose fly.


23 Jun 09 - 09:12 PM (#2663207)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Peace

Ontario black fly.


23 Jun 09 - 09:15 PM (#2663209)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Peace

Cleaning this sonuvabitch off a building . . . .


23 Jun 09 - 09:23 PM (#2663214)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Peace

"If you catch a fly in California, it must be housed in a container large enough for it to turn around and extend its wings without touching another fly. Clarification about whether or not it must be kept under 'free range' conditions and supplied with an adequately large fresh cow patty will be forthcoming from that state's legislative arm before 2015. Musca Domestica's expected life span is only 21 days, though, so don't sweat the law on this one."

For anyone who was worried . . . .


23 Jun 09 - 10:10 PM (#2663223)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Rapparee

"Mmmmmmmmmmmm...them's gooooooood eatin'!"
                            --Kermit


23 Jun 09 - 11:27 PM (#2663259)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Donuel

The family of maggots that called that fly Father, is saddened by this disrespectful display of callous indifference to his murder.
When questioned the young maggots said "mmmm shit"

The mother was unavailable for comment and was last traced to a motel six in Tyson's Corner.


24 Jun 09 - 12:13 PM (#2663583)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Stringsinger

Before you put PETA down you should consider where your meat products come from and the inhumane processes that adorn your table. The fly thing was symbolic.

The abuse of overcrowding of chickens, pigs, in filthy pens and the indiscriminate slaughter of cattle are not. Also, the contribution of these practices to global warming and to contaminated drinking water are something to be considered. Somebody please tell Al Gore.

Give PETA a break. They are making a valid point about the abuse of animals.

Frank


24 Jun 09 - 01:00 PM (#2663631)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Peace

This is about the killing of a fly.

Yes, animals that are raised for butchering have needed and still need better conditions. For that, PETA is correct. For this fly thing they have their heads up their arses.


24 Jun 09 - 01:03 PM (#2663636)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Peace

Maybe PETA could help with this situation.


24 Jun 09 - 01:09 PM (#2663642)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Peace

People are animals, too.


24 Jun 09 - 01:12 PM (#2663648)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Rapparee

Which is why I'm more interested in the ethical treatment of people. Once that is achieved all else will fall into place.


24 Jun 09 - 02:33 PM (#2663709)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Stringsinger

Rapaire, not necessarily. Remember the original quote of the Golden Rule which has been misquoted in the bible. "Don't do unto others as you would not like them do unto you."
I'm sure Bush thought he was doing the "ethical" thing as so many politicians and religious leaders advocate. They still eat meat which is produced by inhumane practices.

Whose ethics are we talking about here?

PETA is making a point, many humans treat animals badly regardless of their "ethics".

Frank


24 Jun 09 - 02:41 PM (#2663715)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Peace

It ain't about ethics. It's about eating. The Jains feel it is not right to pull an apple from a tree, thus 'killing' the apple. So, they wait until it falls. THEN thay can eat it. Should we have PETV telling us we are murderers because we tore a carrot from the ground? And next time I shoot and skin and butcher a moose, will I have some asshole from PETA on my doorstep telling me I should have used a tranquilizer dart, waited until the moose fell asleep and THEN shot him?

Watch a cat with a mouse. The animal kingdom knows very little about 'ethics' or PETA when it comes to eating. No offense meant, Frank.


24 Jun 09 - 03:36 PM (#2663759)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: gnu

WHAT? Shoot a moose with a tranq dart and wait for it to fall asleep? That would be putting the moose under undue trauma and strain. Better to kill it cleanly and quickly with a well placed round so that it does not suffer.

Besides, it will bleed better and be far more tastey at brekky.

Now, what about the live lobsters in the display tank at the grocery store? That REALLY bugs me.


24 Jun 09 - 03:39 PM (#2663762)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Rapparee

Lobsters are just insects that weren't smart enough to evolve.


24 Jun 09 - 03:53 PM (#2663771)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Rapparee

I think that PETA, like other organizations and so many people, confuse ethics and morals. It is, in most cultures, immoral to eat other people, and yet ethically it is (under certain circumstances) permissible. It is unethical to kill another, but permissible under certain circumstances. Theft is unethical, but if you are starving...?

Morals are what our cultural beliefs have told us is right and wrong. Ethics are those practices which are universally right or wrong. It is very easy to confuse the two, as they often overlap.

In one of the South Pacific cultures the groom was required to kill his mother-in-law on his wedding day. Morally, given the culture, this was just fine. Ethically, it was taking another's life.

Was it suicide or a praiseworthy act for an elderly Inuit to walk away from the group and freeze him/her self to death so that the communal food supplies would stretch a while longer? Moral or immoral? Ethical or un-?

You decide; I can't decide for you.


24 Jun 09 - 03:59 PM (#2663778)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: meself

"Ethics are those practices which are universally right or wrong."

I'm not sure there are any such things, are there?


24 Jun 09 - 04:07 PM (#2663782)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: gnu

Rapaire... "In one of the South Pacific cultures the groom was required to kill his mother-in-law on his wedding day."

But, what if she was a really nice person? And the FiL even said he'd like to keep her around for a while longer?


24 Jun 09 - 06:31 PM (#2663870)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Rapparee

Nope, couldn't do it even if it was Mother Theresa.

I believe the idea was to prevent any possibility of the groom being sexually active with his mother-in-law and thereby screwing messing up the gene pool, inheritances, genealogy, and all sorts of things.


24 Jun 09 - 06:39 PM (#2663876)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Rapparee

Meself, that's were the study comes in. What is universal and what is local mores? Spartan youth had to steal their food and eventually kill a peasant/slave. The Papacy burned quite a few Gnostic "Perfects" alive following the fall of Monserrat -- and not to even get into the Inquisition.

I don't pretend to know The Universals, but I'd guess at some of them, recognizing that circumstances can alter the ethics of the act. E.g.:

Don't kill anyone unless you have to.
Tell the truth whenever possible.
Try not to hurt anyone unnecessarily.

He is a barbarian, and thinks that the customs of his tribe and island are the laws of nature.
                                  -- G. B. Shaw


24 Jun 09 - 06:56 PM (#2663885)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: frogprince

When it comes right down to it, common sense is the only reliable guide to right and wrong.


24 Jun 09 - 09:35 PM (#2664013)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: jeddy

i stand by the thing... if you can't kill it you shouldn't eat it.

which is why my mrs is a veggie.

i rekon i could kill and bucher my own meat if i had to, would quite like to challenge myself.

sorry if this is a repeat, i cannot remember where i posted what to!!

PETA do flag up some important issues, but when you jump on something like this it only serves to make them look stupid and over sensitive. nobody will take anything they say seriously after this, which is a shame.

take care all and happy munching!

jade x x


25 Jun 09 - 05:59 PM (#2664736)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Don(Wyziwyg)T

Seems to me PETA needs to heed the sage advice of the old soldier.

CHOOSE YOUR BATTLES!

Lashing out blindly, and taking a principle to ridiculous levels, simply makes you look stupid, especially when the context makes it look like a snide dig at a political opponent.

You need something much more serious to have a pop at a President.

Even in Bill Clinton's case, half the world's males were saying "Lucky B***ard".

Don T.


25 Jun 09 - 06:05 PM (#2664743)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Peace

So, Obama swatted a fly. Tell me then, why isn't the so-called 'moral majority' up in arms about it? Instead, PETA gets involved. Fawk . . . .


26 Jun 09 - 06:39 AM (#2665124)
Subject: RE: BS: PETA looking foolish over a fly
From: Don(Wyziwyg)T

So THAT'S why the host spent most of the interview time bent double, with his hands in his lap.

I thought he was leaning forward to concentrate.

I bet he didn't ask any awkward questions after that.

New, and impressive, aspects of the new Pres emerge day by day.

Don T.