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BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!

11 Oct 10 - 10:28 AM (#3004425)
Subject: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Little Hawk

In a blatant attempt to get the youth vote, Chongo Chimp has released a music video of himself doing the song "She Bangs". You can tell from Chongo's svelte appearance in this video that the hairdressing and makeup crew have given him the full treatment beforehand...never has he looked better. Eat your hearts out, Barack Obama and Sarah Palin! Poor Donald Trump will never look this good.

Chongo's delivery of the song is at once both sophisticated and understated. He has clearly studied the famed William Shatner technique of vocal recital, but has toned it down considerably to remove the extreme histrionics and overtly dramatic flourishes of the Shatner Method, resulting in a surprisingly agreeable and subtle rendition of the somewhat racy lyric.

Anyway, here it is:


Chongo performs "She Bangs"

Awesome, eh?


11 Oct 10 - 10:41 AM (#3004435)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Bill D

'Awesome' isn't exactly the word I'd use..............


11 Oct 10 - 10:42 AM (#3004436)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Rapparee

Yeah, awesome. Right.


11 Oct 10 - 10:49 AM (#3004440)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Amos

His delivery is both understated and under-understated. He brings new meaning to the age-old category of pathos personified.

A


11 Oct 10 - 11:53 AM (#3004483)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Donuel

Chongo sells out and goes commercial. Is this a strategy toward celebrity for a political future or a bid for shallow wealth?
monkey see monkey doo doo


11 Oct 10 - 12:38 PM (#3004526)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Little Hawk

My goodness, that is one hyperactive monkey, isn't it?


11 Oct 10 - 01:53 PM (#3004581)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Ebbie

Monkey? Those caption writers. pfuui!


11 Oct 10 - 03:36 PM (#3004645)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Little Hawk

It's shameful isn't it? He's obviously an ape, but most of the North American population seems oblivious to the differences between apes and monkeys.


11 Oct 10 - 05:58 PM (#3004724)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Rapparee

I've just looked at that video of Chongo again and he's lip-synching!!!

It's Milli Vanilli all over again!


11 Oct 10 - 09:30 PM (#3004852)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: katlaughing

What a cheeky fellow!


11 Oct 10 - 09:46 PM (#3004867)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Sawzaw

What ever happened to Cheecho? Busted again?


11 Oct 10 - 09:50 PM (#3004868)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Rapparee

If he lip-synchs music he'll lip-synch his speeches! Nobody knows what he REALLY means!

American Primate Party? More like the American Prevarication Party!

Who are Chongo's bosses? Who is pulling this puppet's strings? Who is behind THIS political stooge?


11 Oct 10 - 09:53 PM (#3004871)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Bobert

Tried to tell ya' the sumabich was a monkey, LH....

B~


11 Oct 10 - 10:50 PM (#3004910)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Little Hawk

Boy, the specism around here is terrible. Just terrible.


11 Oct 10 - 11:14 PM (#3004927)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Rapparee

Nah, he's just like the rest of them politicians.


12 Oct 10 - 09:09 AM (#3005142)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Little Hawk

That's not true! He can drink most of them under the table with consummate ease.


12 Oct 10 - 11:01 AM (#3005207)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Rapparee

He's a tool of the Big Bosses, a mouthpiece for those who would be masters of the workers, a sot who will do anything for a glass of booze and a banana, a do-nothing dancing doll of the Daley Dynasty.


12 Oct 10 - 11:03 AM (#3005208)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Rapparee

The master plays the barrel organ and little Chongo, in his cute little jacket and hat, does back flips and then works the crowd with his cute little tin cup, all the while chained to his master.


12 Oct 10 - 11:45 AM (#3005238)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Little Hawk

Oh, you are really askin' for it, buster. Chongo doesn't put up with this sort of scurrilous inuendo and unconscionable character assassination.


12 Oct 10 - 12:06 PM (#3005258)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Rapparee

I ordered an IWW tee shirt the other day....


12 Oct 10 - 12:10 PM (#3005265)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Little Hawk

I think what you really need at this point is an armoured vest.


12 Oct 10 - 12:24 PM (#3005276)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Rapparee

"An injury to one is an injury to all."

Join the union, fellow workers
Men and women, side by side;
We will crush the greedy shirkers
Like a sweeping; surging tide;
For united we are standing,
But divided we will fall;
Let this be our understanding
All for one and one for all.


             --Joe Hill


12 Oct 10 - 01:49 PM (#3005348)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Amos

Don't mourn for Chongo--ORGANIZE!

Let's get these simians back in the jungle where they belong!



A


12 Oct 10 - 02:02 PM (#3005353)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Little Hawk

Hark! The voice of the specist fascist warmongering pigdog rings out loud and clear!!! To the barricades, all primates! Cast out the evildoers and cleanse the homeland of those despicable wretches!


12 Oct 10 - 03:52 PM (#3005427)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Amos

Oh, Chongo is a lowly ape
Away, Chongo!
He chatters, leers and al;so gapes
And it's go away, you Chongo

Oh, Chongo is an ugly cuss
Away, Chongo!
He's lower by far than all of us!
And it's go away, you Chongo

And Chongo is no olliphant
Away, Chongo!
He's a feces-flinging miscreant!
And it's go away, you Chongo

Chongo screeches like a duck
Away, Chongo!
By God, he is an ugly fuck!
And it's go away, you Chongo

Oh, Chongo signed to go to sea
Away, Chongo!
But he could only screech and pee
And it's go away, you Chongo

They tied him to the topmast high
Away, Chongo!
But he would only screech and cry
And it's go away, you Chongo

They tied him up far down below
Away, Chongo!
But his teeth is all that he would show
And it's go away, you Chongo

They tied him to the anchor's fin
Away, Chongo!
And braced him up and threw him in
And it's go away, you Chongo


So Chongo is with us no more
Away, Chongo!
He washed up on the Callao shore
And it's go away, you Chongo


Old Chongo drowned on the Callao bar
Away, Chongo!
We're better off without him far!
And it's go away, you Chongo


12 Oct 10 - 05:10 PM (#3005466)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Little Hawk

Such is Chongo's charisma and mass appeal that he has inspired hundreds of laudatory songs and poems written by well-wishers from across the country. This can only work to this great ape's advantage in the grueling political campaign that lies ahead as the APP fights the good fight to at last put a chimp in the White House. And NOT a cheap chimp imitator from Texas this time! No siree. This time America wants the Real Thing.


12 Oct 10 - 05:39 PM (#3005482)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Little Hawk

"He KNOWS which end to peel the banana from. Do you? Vote for Chongo in 2012!"


12 Oct 10 - 05:53 PM (#3005495)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Rapparee

He pees his banana? Good Heavens, what a filthy habit. We've had Presidents with nasty habits before now, but....


12 Oct 10 - 05:54 PM (#3005497)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Little Hawk

Nixon did FAR worse things.


12 Oct 10 - 06:27 PM (#3005518)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Rapparee

So you're on record as saying that Chongo isn't quite as bad a Nixon was, huh?


12 Oct 10 - 06:44 PM (#3005533)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Little Hawk

Are you a lawyer, sir? Or are you an agent provocateur? And how long have you been kicking your dog and cheating on your taxes?


12 Oct 10 - 07:40 PM (#3005567)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Rapparee

1. No, but my wife is so I have been contaminated.
2. No, I've retired.
3a. I don't have a dog, cat or any other animal companion.
3b. As long as you have.


12 Oct 10 - 08:31 PM (#3005599)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Amos

You have a flair for political doubletalk, Little Hawk. You should consider becoming a Republican.

A


13 Oct 10 - 12:55 AM (#3005728)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Little Hawk

Surely you jest, Amos! ;-) To have such abilities qualifies one ideally for supporting either one of those wretched parties you unfortunates have to vote for down there....hell, it's practically obligatory at the higher levels, isn't it?


13 Oct 10 - 01:02 AM (#3005730)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Little Hawk

Anyway, I'd rather chew nails all day and play nothing but Bobby Vinton songs for the rest of my life than become a Democrat. ;-)

And I'd rather chew nails all day and all night and get raped by rabid baboons and put through a meat mincing machine than become a Republican!!!!!!

(Just to give you a comparative idea of how I feel about either horrifying possibility...) Heh!


13 Oct 10 - 01:56 AM (#3005751)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Amos

I know a few baboons who will volunteer.


A


13 Oct 10 - 09:13 AM (#3005958)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Little Hawk

Ah, but I haven't said I would join, have I? ;-D They'll have to wait.


13 Oct 10 - 10:48 AM (#3006009)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Rapparee

Actual research has verified that ALL political parties in the US are controlled by a Canadian Cabal that goes under the name "Possum Lodge." Located in the muskeg region the members not only control the Illuminati, but also the Tri-Lateral Commission, North Korea, the Bohemian Club, Krupp Arms, Skoda, the Society of Jesus, Opus Dei, the Freemasons, and nearly everything else. During their rituals the members cavort naked outside their secret clubhouse (on the outside of which is painted "No Grils Allowed!"), slapping themselves while doing wild dances during which they are surrounded by a dark, buzzing cloud of their evil familiars. Note that they do NOT control the Idaho Legion.


13 Oct 10 - 03:59 PM (#3006298)
Subject: RE: BS: Chongo does music video for campaign!!!
From: Little Hawk

Well, now you've really done it, Rapaire.

I trust your last will and testament is all finalized and up to date? All beneficiaries duly noted? Executors appointed and ready? Underwear clean? Dependents provided for? I certainly hope so.

The nice thing is, Chongo can put his mind to other, more important things now and won't have to spend any more of his valuable time planning how to shut you up...you have taken that little problem off his plate and put it onto a much larger one. You're, like, already gone, eh? ;-D