That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.

13 Oct 10 - 10:33 AM (#3005997)
Subject: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Tim Leaning

That Blitherscrum Folk Festival is shit.
They advertise it as Folk but then when you go its loads of beardy wazzocks singing old bloody songs and stuff
Discuss.

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13 Oct 10 - 10:47 AM (#3006007)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller

"its loads of beardy wazzocks singing old bloody songs and stuff "

Sounds more like that Crosby, Stills and Nash at Glastonbuggery.

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13 Oct 10 - 10:51 AM (#3006012)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,Silas

"loads of beardy wazzocks singing old bloody songs and stuff"

Love absoloutly LOVE IT!!!!!

LOL

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13 Oct 10 - 10:51 AM (#3006013)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,bearded wazzock

I hate bloody folk songs, and what's more if any of them smiled smugly at me I'd start a bloody thread on Mudcat about it!

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13 Oct 10 - 10:59 AM (#3006019)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,Beardybanjiman

"They advertise it as Folk but then when you go its loads of beardy wazzocks singing old bloody songs and stuff "

Well clearly it's not really folk.... all real folkies know that all the real folk singers are dead.

.... and just because a song is old, doesn't make it a folk song, in fact all the folk songs are dead as well. Killed by the interweb and by simple working folk becoming literate.

Claerly you know nothing Mr Leaning, in fact you're sh+t.

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13 Oct 10 - 11:05 AM (#3006024)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,Nu-Folkie

Sadly I'm too young to have grown a beard yet, because I'm only twelve and three quarters. I'm looking forward to being a beardy wazzock soon though!

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13 Oct 10 - 11:07 AM (#3006025)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,leeneia

Yes, but was there a panel discussion on What is Folk?

(I've never heard the term 'wazzock' before. Did you just make it up, Tim? And is the accent on the 'waz-' or the '-zock'?)

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13 Oct 10 - 11:10 AM (#3006028)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Rain Dog

7 posts already to this thread. That proves beyond any shadow of a doubt Blitherscrum Folk Festival is shit. The whole of Mudcat has spoken. No, in fact the whole of the world has spoken.

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13 Oct 10 - 11:13 AM (#3006030)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller

This thread is wazzockist. There must be a law against it.

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13 Oct 10 - 11:13 AM (#3006031)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Fred McCormick

That's the trouble with folk. It's full of beardy wazzocks singing old bloody songs and stuff. If I hear one more song about maidenheads and strong cider I'll throw up.

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13 Oct 10 - 11:16 AM (#3006032)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller

"maidenheads and strong cider "

Maidenheads haven't existed since we discovered sex in 1965 - or was it 1695? Sod it, just pass the strong cider.

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13 Oct 10 - 11:16 AM (#3006033)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Backwoodsman

And what's wrong with Maidenhead? Maidenheadians will tell you it's a fine town. But us beardy old wazzocks know it's nearly as shit as Blitherscrum.

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13 Oct 10 - 11:17 AM (#3006036)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,Brynhildr

"beardy wazzocks singing old bloody songs and stuff"

You bloody call that "singing"? I'm a professional in the music industry and all folk singers are total crap and pretentious as well. All other music is brilliant though. I know that because I'm a professional in the music industry.

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13 Oct 10 - 11:17 AM (#3006037)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: John MacKenzie

Not all the bearded wazzocks are male, either !

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13 Oct 10 - 11:19 AM (#3006039)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Manitas_at_home

I think you'll find that most of the posters here are guests, in fact I suspect the whole thing is a wind-up.

PS Fred what have you got against Maidenhead? It seems such a nice place... at least it would be if it wasn't for the bloody Sloanes pouring out of the restaurants at closing time.

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13 Oct 10 - 11:19 AM (#3006041)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller

Maidenheads are so bloody pretentious: "Oh look at me, I'm a virgin".

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13 Oct 10 - 11:21 AM (#3006043)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: fat B****rd

Never mind 'Wazzock?'. 'Virgin?'

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13 Oct 10 - 11:23 AM (#3006045)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,Beardybanjiman

"I think you'll find that most of the posters here are guests, in fact I suspect the whole thing is a wind-up."

Yes, but how do we know? We might be offending someone, I think this thread should be closed NOW!!!

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13 Oct 10 - 11:28 AM (#3006049)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,Dorothy Frottage

Hi! I've just dropped in to stir up some shit. I'll post again in a minute under a different GUEST identity, that way you'll never suspect it's me!!! Tee hee!

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13 Oct 10 - 11:29 AM (#3006050)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller

"Maidenheads are so bloody pretentious"

theleveller, you really are a complete twat - why do't you just fuck off (all three of you)?

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13 Oct 10 - 11:36 AM (#3006056)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,Member of Bulboushead

>>>Maidenheads are so bloody pretentious: "Oh look at me, I'm a virgin".<<<

My band Bulboushead was at Blitherscrum and we were great! I'm going to tell my mum on you lot then you'll be sorry.

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13 Oct 10 - 11:38 AM (#3006058)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Manitas_at_home

This thread wasn't meant to be anbout you... until now!

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13 Oct 10 - 11:41 AM (#3006060)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Fred McCormick

Maidenheads plural with a m. Not Maidenhead single with a M. I wanted to call my dog Maidenhead on the grounds that Maidenhead Berks.

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13 Oct 10 - 11:42 AM (#3006061)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Backwoodsman

They're all berks in Maidenhead. They should all fuck off.

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13 Oct 10 - 11:45 AM (#3006064)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Backwoodsman

"Maidenheads are so bloody pretentious: "Oh look at me, I'm a virgin". "

My wife's a Born-Again Virgin. She says virgins are shit, especially virgins from Blitherscrum and Maidenhead.

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13 Oct 10 - 11:48 AM (#3006066)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller

"loads of beardy wazzocks singing old bloody songs"

Are we using the 1954 definition of wazzock here or the hyphen-wazzock derivation, as in nu-wazzock, psych-wazzock or wazzock-rock?

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13 Oct 10 - 11:52 AM (#3006071)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller

"My wife's a Born-Again Virgin."

You should try some of that Niagara - belting.

Eyup, we've gone below the belt now. How BS is that?

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13 Oct 10 - 11:53 AM (#3006074)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,wazzock police

'Are we using the 1954 definition of wazzock here or the hyphen-wazzock derivation, as in nu-wazzock, psych-wazzock or wazzock-rock?'

Ello ello ello, wots all this then?

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13 Oct 10 - 12:07 PM (#3006088)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller

LOL!

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13 Oct 10 - 12:08 PM (#3006089)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Fred McCormick

The On-Line Slang Dictionary defines a wazzock as "an idiot; an annoyingly stupid person".

Thus the term may not be entirely appertinant to Bitherscrum, other than at festival time.

BTW., it should be distinguished from wazzcocker, which is a noun meaning "Someone who likes to go and get wasted". Now that, I would have thought is a perfect summation of the Blitherscrum Festival regulars, bearded or not.

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13 Oct 10 - 12:10 PM (#3006091)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,Beardybanjman

"bearded or not."

Don't be silly!

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13 Oct 10 - 12:12 PM (#3006092)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,Pencil Beard

And how about that bloody duo Sod Outage and Jimmy Oar? Who did they come as? That blatant refusal to take any risks WHATSOEVER with their so called "grime" and "dubstep" is a friggin' crime against folk music, so it is. And I bet they can't even grow a beard. Between them. Even a wilfully experimental one.

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13 Oct 10 - 12:12 PM (#3006093)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Fred McCormick

What's silly about that? Even the women at Blitherscrum have beards. Any more of this and I'll come and knock your eye out.

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13 Oct 10 - 12:16 PM (#3006101)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller

I'm sick of all this crap. I'm leaving - for good!

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13 Oct 10 - 12:17 PM (#3006102)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,Mr. Parsnip

Pish and tush! I'm not denying that some wazzocks may be beardy and that some beardys might be wazzocks, but not all of them sing old bloody songs and stuff at Blitherscrum!

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13 Oct 10 - 12:17 PM (#3006103)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller

Did you miss me?

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13 Oct 10 - 12:18 PM (#3006105)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,Beardybanjiman

"Even the women at Blitherscrum have beards"

Precisely.

But if you want to make something of it pal .......... I'll see you outside the Old Black Cock!

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13 Oct 10 - 12:19 PM (#3006106)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,Ewan Mcoll

Err...

Can anyone lend me a razor?

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13 Oct 10 - 12:21 PM (#3006108)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Fred McCormick

I'll tell you something else about the Blitherscrum crowd. Some of them are keg beer fiends. Many a time I've been stood at the beer tent wondering whether to have the Dogs Ballox, or the Farmers Faeces when a voice behind me has said "wot? no firkin keg?"

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13 Oct 10 - 01:47 PM (#3006187)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Tim Leaning

If these guests were at my house I would be nervous too.
See that Virgin Airways?
Run by a beardy wazzock! and what use is a virgin in one o them airoplane toilet?
Unless they got a beard of course.
I was saying to one o them mellow head fiddlers its all very well mate but you young uns should be writing new folks songs not singing all this old shit . you should just let it die and make some new ones while you wait for your ironic wazzock beard to grow.
That Blitherscrum is shite it is.

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13 Oct 10 - 04:56 PM (#3006335)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Arthur_itus

I heard that Blitherscrum is to allow doggers and cottagers at their functions in future, becuase the police will protect them against the wazzocks and therefore they will have police prescence for nowt.

Tight fisted gits.

Is this Tim Leaning the organiser of Blitherscum?

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14 Oct 10 - 03:17 AM (#3006620)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller

I think you're all shite. I'm off to talk to some proper wazzocks on that fRoots board.

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14 Oct 10 - 03:45 AM (#3006632)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller

WTF is a blitherscrum anyway? Sounds like some sort of rugby manoeuvre ...."right lads, let's go for the blitherscrum, then throw a reverse shrewsbury with a double shepley.....a short cropredy round the flank and we're there – straight into the sidmouth".

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14 Oct 10 - 04:06 AM (#3006644)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,Beardybanjiman

Leveller, you're a right flanker!

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14 Oct 10 - 04:23 AM (#3006653)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Stu

Reminds me of that Phillip Larkin poem:

Blitherscum, Blitherscum,
with your beardy wazzocks
singing,
you are
shit.

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14 Oct 10 - 04:28 AM (#3006655)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller

I love this thread!

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14 Oct 10 - 06:06 AM (#3006699)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,Beardybanjiman

"Is this Tim Leaning the organiser of Blitherscum?"

I hope not, it'll just be full of sniggysnoggy wazzocks with their painful insights into the worlds problems and songs written after the 13th century. Some of them choruses will be catchy enough to singalong to.

Won't be no room for 97 verse ballads nor shanties (sung without harmonies of course).

People might even enjoy themselves.....

That'd be shit.

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14 Oct 10 - 08:15 AM (#3006760)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Fred McCormick

I'll tell you something else and all. Their singarounds are crap. I haven't been to one yet without somebody's sung:

"It fell about the Marmitemas,
When the leaves were sweetly blooming.
That he promised he'd take me up to the north lands.
Hey with a gay and a grinding."

Who wants to listen to that?

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14 Oct 10 - 08:23 AM (#3006770)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller

Well, that can't be a proper traddie wazzock song because they always start with "As I walked out one May morning on Radcliffe Highway", and end with someone getting shagged or killed (or both) - othewrwise it's not authentic

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14 Oct 10 - 08:43 AM (#3006786)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Dave Hanson

Beardy wazzocks bleating about dead sailors, dead miners, rape and incest..........er 'ang on a bit, that sounds pretty bloody good to me.

Dave H

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14 Oct 10 - 08:55 AM (#3006794)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller

...and beer - lots of songs about beer! Eyup, Dave, it's my round. Now, altogether "As I walked out one May morning on Radcliffe highway on my way to the pub...."

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14 Oct 10 - 09:17 AM (#3006802)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Fred McCormick

Anything's a proper traddie wazzock song. It all depends on the treatment. Many's the time I've heard them singing shanties such as:

"Rolling down to Frisco Bay,
For the sailor likes his bottle-o.
Stand by your mainsprits with a rope in each hand
And take your time at the dander-o."

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14 Oct 10 - 09:21 AM (#3006805)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: olddude

Ok but is shit defined in the 1954 book of folk Laws and definitions? I bet it isn't hence ...what is shit? ... who defines it ... we have no reference ... and beards ... how long, how groomed ... OH my no book to reference there either ... all is lost

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14 Oct 10 - 10:01 AM (#3006825)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller

"Anything's a proper traddie wazzock song."

Well I've never seen an elephant sing.

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14 Oct 10 - 10:12 AM (#3006830)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,Beardybanjiman

"and end with someone getting shagged or killed (or both)"

But which way round?

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14 Oct 10 - 03:36 PM (#3007054)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Smedley

Lovely thread!!

And to the person who asked, you stress the "wazz" and it's not a new word.

Now what about that Glenn-Miller-goes-folk lot Wazzockhead ??

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15 Oct 10 - 03:18 AM (#3007538)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller

"you stress the "wazz""

I always need a wazz when I'm stressed.

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15 Oct 10 - 03:54 AM (#3007548)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Dave Hanson

Or as Tony Capstick once said ' you great fat spawny eyed parrot faced wazzock, ' 'e 'ad a way with words that lad, well 'e was from Rotherham tha knows.

Dave H

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15 Oct 10 - 06:49 AM (#3007624)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,georgiansilver in Devon!

As one of the organisers of Blitherscrum Festival I have to object to the word sh*t being used to describe it. This shows immaturity and ignorance of the correct term which is 'sh*te.... I have to say that in spite of many Festivals closing, Blitherscrum is thriving. We are already plannng next years Festival.... and have already booked or should I say re-booked:- Jezlo!,,, Vinegar Butt,,,,Peeleyed Stan,,,,, and and Flosser of Maida Vale.

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15 Oct 10 - 10:12 AM (#3007767)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Dave Hanson

Oh no ! er can you please do it in early summer when I'll be fishing in Scotland ?

Dave H

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15 Oct 10 - 10:35 AM (#3007775)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller

"As one of the organisers of Blitherscrum Festival"

Did you use sheepdogs?

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15 Oct 10 - 11:57 AM (#3007836)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Arthur_itus

That Tim Leaning has a lot to answer for Georgiansilver, for lowering the standards of all you stand for. When he is next in Gainsborough, I suggest you give him ten penneth of sh*te.

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16 Oct 10 - 09:48 AM (#3008406)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST

theleveller... I have never used a sheepdog in my life! We have always had meaningful relationships!!!!

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17 Oct 10 - 03:49 AM (#3008874)
Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Mingulay

Ah! Blitherscrum. How many know that the smokeworks grounds are the only British breeding place of the beardy wazzock according to Bill Oddie, and he should know being a well known 'twitcher'. Mind you, there's a lot of twitching goes on in Blitherscrum, usually in dark and damp places frequented by cuckoos for some reason.

As for the place being shit, what better accolade could be given to the town containing the only 30 acre open cesspit in these fair isles. Makes you proud to be British.

By the way, Mr Oddie describes the song of the beardy wazzock as being no great shakes and somewhat akin to a foghorn with adenoids.

"As I was a wazzocking one morning in May..........."

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