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09 Mar 11 - 07:22 PM (#3110754) Subject: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: Jack Campin One bit of biology I'm *sure* the fundies don't want taught in schools: Nature via the BBC: evolutionary loss of human penile spines Somebody feel like writing a lament for them? |
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09 Mar 11 - 07:52 PM (#3110760) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: Steve Shaw Jack, do you think this could be why we call it a "prick?" |
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09 Mar 11 - 07:53 PM (#3110761) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: Smokey. ..Entitled "Trampolining isn't what it Used to be" |
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09 Mar 11 - 08:08 PM (#3110769) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp It ain't right to be talkin' publicly about stuff like this. Some things should be kept behind closed doors. What good is romance if ya take away all the mystery? - Chongo |
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09 Mar 11 - 08:18 PM (#3110772) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: Steve Shaw It doesn't matter if the door isn't closed as long as the beast is asleep. You should know that. Even if the beast turns out to be a porcupine. |
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09 Mar 11 - 08:26 PM (#3110775) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: wysiwyg Whole new meaning to call someone "you spineless ninny" then... ~S~ |
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09 Mar 11 - 08:30 PM (#3110778) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: Steve Shaw ...and to when the missus says, "I don't know what it is, but you're really needling me tonight..." |
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09 Mar 11 - 08:30 PM (#3110779) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp I am talkin' about privacy and old-fashioned romance here as opposed to draggin' everything out into public discussion and lookin' at it under a friggin' microscope, Steve. Porcupines got nothin' to do with it. It's disgustin' how everyone talks about sex these days like they was talkin' about baseball scores or somethin'. People nowadays just ain't got no class no more. You won't catch me revealin' no intimate details. If I'd been Bill Clinton and they'd started askin' me all them intimate questions about what happened with Monica, I'd have just told 'em all, "Go to hell, cos it's none of yer damn business!" And I'd have walked right outta the room if they persisted. - Chongo |
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09 Mar 11 - 08:33 PM (#3110781) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: Steve Shaw lookin' at it under a friggin' microscope... Don't tempt me... |
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09 Mar 11 - 09:16 PM (#3110795) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: CapriUni Speaking as a woman, I say: "Good riddance!" Human pregnancy and childbirth are difficult enough without risking injury from the get-go (proably another reason we got rid of 'em). |
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09 Mar 11 - 09:18 PM (#3110796) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: Seamus Kennedy Wow..'penile spines' spelled backwards is 'penile spines'. Wow! |
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09 Mar 11 - 09:32 PM (#3110806) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: Bob the Postman What spines? I don't see any freakin' spines. |
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09 Mar 11 - 10:10 PM (#3110811) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp I have seen some outrageous specist crap in my time, Bob, but that site is the friggin' final limit! When I go to Ireland next, I am gonna find the jerk responsible for it and kick his ass! - Chongo |
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09 Mar 11 - 10:38 PM (#3110817) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: Rapparee The Universities at Standford, Pennsylvania and Dartmouth can't all be wrong. Chongo is sticky pricky. |
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09 Mar 11 - 10:47 PM (#3110821) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: Bob the Postman Oh, you mean those spines. |
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09 Mar 11 - 10:51 PM (#3110827) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: Jeri Seamus, 'penile spines' spelled backwards is 'senips elinep'. Or if you REALLY want to spell it backwards, it's b.a.c.k.w.a.r.d.s., but the pronunciations all buggered. Hey, at least Chongo can call it a "boner" and really mean it. |
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09 Mar 11 - 10:59 PM (#3110830) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: Rapparee Originally the penile spines acted with the foreskin as a sort of umbrella, the spines being the umbrella ribs and...well, you get the idea. This provided not only protection from the rain, but also from the sun in the hot African veldt. Humans gave up the spines when then realized that you couldn't have both reproduction and protection from the weather, finding that the shade of a tree could serve the same purpose. This led to more and better thinking abilities. Chimpanzees, on the other hand, never did figure it out and that's why such as Chongo are evolutionary dead-ends, stuck (if you'll pardon the expression) in the past with no hope of progressing into the future. Thus, we humans use them as test subjects instead of the other way around. |
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09 Mar 11 - 11:08 PM (#3110835) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: Don Firth Does this have anything to do with the song, "You Always Hurt the One You Love?" Don Firth |
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09 Mar 11 - 11:09 PM (#3110836) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: GUEST,Alan Whittle How oft i do repine For my lovely penile spines They were stiff and spry - like bristles on a badger But one day i gave a cough and ...ah me! They all dropped off And alas! A big knotty one impaled my poor old nadgers. Life was quite sublime For a boy with penile spines twas very heaven to be young, I felt elated But my spikey dick got caught As I retrieved it from my shorts And by the early morning wee, was I saturated. |
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09 Mar 11 - 11:12 PM (#3110839) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: GUEST,MR Penile Spines TO YOU! Actually, if you want to spell it backwards it's T I Bloodnok |
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10 Mar 11 - 04:01 AM (#3110928) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: Steve Shaw I have a theory that penile spines were selected against as teenage masturbation became more popular, in about 1964 I estimate. Oddly, sales of the right-handed one of the pairs of those thick gardening gloves declined at the same time. |
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10 Mar 11 - 08:47 AM (#3111051) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: GUEST,Patsy Cats, I kid you not Tom cats still have them, more barbs than spines and it is not a particularly pleasant experience for the queens (cats fem) so I've read. |
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10 Mar 11 - 08:52 AM (#3111054) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: Monique Indeed, it's why here they're said to meow "M'a fach mau" pronounced "mahfahmaow" (i.e. he hurt me) when he's done with it. |
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10 Mar 11 - 08:54 AM (#3111055) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: Steve Shaw I just knew this thread would degenerate into barbed remarks. |
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10 Mar 11 - 10:04 AM (#3111086) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: Rapparee Oh fer...straighten up and stiffen your spine, lad! |
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10 Mar 11 - 10:06 AM (#3111090) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: Bob the Postman Size counts. |
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10 Mar 11 - 12:34 PM (#3111173) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: GUEST All the world is sad and wan And now my penile spines have gone. How oft I'd stroke those spines for practice To watch them rise up like a cactus. Where are the spines of yesteryear? Without them, I feel proper queer. |
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10 Mar 11 - 03:51 PM (#3111287) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: gnu Rap... "This provided not only protection from the rain, but also from the sun in the hot African veldt." I suppose... if you were walkin around with yer dick hangin out. I suggest that humans had the (big) brains to cover up. Perhaps the male human intelligence leap was brought on by cold rain and sunburn. Or, perhaps by females saying "Put somethin over that. It's disgusting... lazin around watchin the game with yer dick hangin out you lazy bastard." |
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10 Mar 11 - 06:27 PM (#3111350) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: Jack Campin This could have been a major step in the evolution of language. With nowhere to spike spare wads of chewing gum, men had to find something else to do with their mouths so they learned to talk. |
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10 Mar 11 - 07:32 PM (#3111372) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: Smokey. And thus became smooth cunning linguists. |
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11 Mar 11 - 02:30 PM (#3111862) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: Bee-dubya-ell The disappearance of barbs on human penises coincided with the discovery of fellatio. The barbs simply felt they'd be more at home on women's tongues than on men's schlongs, so they moved house in the middle of a blowjob. |
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12 Mar 11 - 05:54 AM (#3112192) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: GUEST,Alan Whittle On the altar of the chapel I laid my dick - shaped like a pineapple And prayed to God, relieve me of these spikes A voice from heaven then did say put that bloody thing away You're not a Christian, piss off mate - on your bike! |
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12 Mar 11 - 06:21 PM (#3112629) Subject: RE: SC: Who Stole My Penile Spines? From: Mrrzy I remember stickly-prickly from the just-so stories, he and slow-and-solid turned into the armadillos... Or would that be armadildos? ?or some other body partodildos? |
