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05 Feb 12 - 12:27 PM (#3302555) Subject: BS: Black Hair HELP! From: LilyFestre Can someone please help this green eyed, brown haired white girl figure out what to do with her son's hair??? Jeremiah is biracial and has loose African American curls. My trouble is that I can't get through his hair after I wash and condition it without pulling and hurting him. I understand that the texture of his hair is way different than my own and is dry so it requires special products. I only wash his hair once a week (bathe more often) and use an olive oil shampoo. I have tried Pantene conditioner but that is useless for his kind of hair. I have tried something called Frizz upon the recommendation of a salon. Then there's a leave in styling cream/conditioner. It works better than the Pantene but runs $25.00 a bottle which isn't really in my budget for infant hair care. I have tried a wide tooth comb, a pick and a detangler comb. I hate that it's such an event to get through his hair. Any suggestions would be appreciated!!! Can anyone help? Please??? Michelle |
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05 Feb 12 - 12:49 PM (#3302564) Subject: RE: BS: Black Hair HELP! From: frogprince Wish our niece wasn't too far away to ask just now; she has a beautiful little girl, four now, with similar pedigree and hair that obviously takes some management effort. |
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05 Feb 12 - 12:56 PM (#3302571) Subject: RE: BS: Black Hair HELP! From: GUEST,Eliza You want coconut oil! My husband is African and that's what he uses. Don't shampoo, just comb the oil through. It'll end up like wire wool if you shampoo-and-dry it like white people's hair! |
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05 Feb 12 - 12:58 PM (#3302574) Subject: RE: BS: Black Hair HELP! From: michaelr Keep it short. |
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05 Feb 12 - 01:00 PM (#3302578) Subject: RE: BS: Black Hair HELP! From: maeve Michelle, here are a couple of starting points. There is a fair amount of advice online that is quite outdated/inaccurate, so I'll also ask one of my friends with three-little-ones-grown-big how she has handled their hair. http://www.adoptn.org/hair.html http://adoption.about.com/od/africanamericanhaircare/bb/black_hair_care.htm |
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05 Feb 12 - 01:00 PM (#3302579) Subject: RE: BS: Black Hair HELP! From: SINSULL http://www.livestrong.com/article/192050-about-black-infant-hair-care/ Some help here. |
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05 Feb 12 - 01:04 PM (#3302581) Subject: RE: BS: Black Hair HELP! From: maeve And here: http://adoption.about.com/od/parenting/qt/wrongproducts.htm "...Do not use products that contain mineral oil or petrolatum. Both of these cheap oils clog pores, rob the hair's moisture and can retard hair growth. Natural oils are the best bet. Jojoba and coconut oil are great conditioning oils. Shea butter is an excellent moisturizer. Pomegranate seed oil is my personal favorite. This exotic oil has excellent moisturizing and nourishing properties and is rich in lipids and essential nutrients. These impart brilliant sheen. It is also an excellent remedy for scalp issues such as dandruff and psoriasis, and has natural sunscreen properties." As Eliza suggested, coconut oil works well and is available. |
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05 Feb 12 - 01:09 PM (#3302585) Subject: RE: BS: Black Hair HELP! From: maeve One more for now: http://www.adoptmed.org/tips/hair-and-skin-care-for-african-children.html Grapeseed oil is mentioned as being less fragrant than coconut oil...along with many other web pages to consider. Eliza- any guidance as to how much of the chosen oil dressing to use? |
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05 Feb 12 - 01:14 PM (#3302589) Subject: RE: BS: Black Hair HELP! From: JohnInKansas Without any experience with the particular hair type, my advice from family barbers, based on experience with more common (for most of us) hair types that are just "frizzie," has been that the most common difficulty with "tangles" is starting the comb at the scalp and trying to pull it through. The recommendation is that you start at the tips, and pinch up a short bit of hair and then comb just that short end. When the tip is straighted as much as you can, you pinch up a slightly longer end and work the longer end straight. If the comb hits a tangle that doesn't yield immediately, pulling on the tangled spot just binds it up tighter. You need to go below the tangle and get the ends straight first, so the tangle has someplace to go when you've worked your way get back up to it. I really don't know how applicable this method may be with the hair you're dealing with. I do know that "barber shop conversations" generally end up with advice that you find an ethnic hair salon where you might find more knowledgeable advice about the many "black hair" concoctions that are available. Note that some of the preparations used by many adults may be quite strong, and you probably will need advice on which may not be safe for infants. John |
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05 Feb 12 - 01:24 PM (#3302597) Subject: RE: BS: Black Hair HELP! From: GUEST,Eliza My husband just puts a little in the palm of his hand and rubs it on his head. Then he works it through with his fingers, and finishes with an 'afro' comb (gently!) I suppose it's about a teaspoonful. Before I was married to him, I had absolutely no idea how different African hair is, and how hard to 'subdue'. In Senegal, I've watched coiffeuses and natteuses (braiders) slosh coconut oil on their clients' heads, then skilfully start braiding, sometimes THREE women at one head, all plaiting away like mad in superb, intricate patterns. Coconut oil is natural and harmless, so the amount you use doesn't really matter. I might add that African skin is different too, rather thick, and tends to get dry. My hubby sloshes Nivea milk on himself, and it keeps his skin soft and supple. Without it, it gets very powdery and dry. |
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05 Feb 12 - 01:37 PM (#3302607) Subject: RE: BS: Black Hair HELP! From: katlaughing I'll ask my daughter, Michelle. Her twin boys are thirteen now. She kept it short for a long time, but now they seem to like it a little longer and care for it themselves. Looks as though you've got plenty of good answers, but I'll still ask her what they use. I have very fine hair and have had to use the start-at-the-ends method as JohninKS described since I was a kid. Used to cry my eyes out when my mom combed it. We didn't know as much back then, so it was a fine-toothed comb top to bottom and it hurt!:-) |
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05 Feb 12 - 02:09 PM (#3302629) Subject: RE: BS: Black Hair HELP! From: Paul Burke Connect him up to 110V 60Hz ac (240V 50 Hz is better, if available). His hair will stand up straight, so you can comb it easily. Stand of a rubber mat and wear insulating gloves while carrying out this preocedure. WARNING- unintended side effects, such as death or house fires, may occur. Check your insurance first. I'll ask my sister-in-law who adopted a wonderful kid of West Indian ancestry 25 years ago how she coped. |
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05 Feb 12 - 02:18 PM (#3302635) Subject: RE: BS: Black Hair HELP! From: LilyFestre Thanks everybody! I know it seems that I should be as easy as asking the barber but I live in a rural area and quite frankly, I have yet to meet anyone that does black hair. I've taken to using scissors to cut out any knots that are really matted as they just hurt him and look like he's not had a bath in months. Thankfully, that has just been a couple of spots on the back of his head where it knots while he sleeps. People tell me to oil his hair but I'm not sure what that means, how much to use or how often. THanks for all your help!!! Michelle |
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05 Feb 12 - 03:09 PM (#3302659) Subject: RE: BS: Black Hair HELP! From: Jeri Most people shampoo their hair too much anyway. I have hair that tends to be dry and frizzy. I just switched to Redken. I think it's low sulfates and it doesn't foam much and my hair feels great afterwards. I think a product like 'Wen' that's info-mercialed to pieces is probably a good idea too. As for combing, remember those wide afro combs? The work well with frizz. So do fingers. John is also right about starting below the tangle. If you just start with the ends first, it will help. Of course, unless Jeremiah's hair is long, that may not be easy. Eliza probably knows best. I have a theory that the dry hair and scalp is the fault of shampoo. The dry skin thing: I was in a bathroom (military barracks with rows of sinks) and a few African Americn women were doing their weekend hair rituals. One of them told me how different African American hair and skin was. It's dry. My hair is dry, and I only wash it once or twice a week, with a rinse or so in between. My skin is dry. The woman said "our skin is so dry, it can get 'ashy'". I said mine did too, but dead white skin cells show up better on brown skin than on not-quite-dead white skin. I do get skin dust though. We're different, but I don't think we're THAT different. I just think (based on me only) white people may be more tolerant of dryness--not a good thing. I have heard of a couple people who don't even shampoo, but use conditioner in place of shampoo. I think that's the idea with Wen. The problem is, it's expensive. I've seen a generic form in beauty supply stores, though. |
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05 Feb 12 - 05:30 PM (#3302741) Subject: RE: BS: Black Hair HELP! From: GUEST,Eliza I agree, Jeri, we tend to wash our hair too often. Once a week is enough for me. Also, white ladies have many more wrinkles as they age. The African ladies I've met (in many countries) all had wrinkle-free skin, so much so that you couldn't believe that some were quite old. It's the constant oiling of the skin which keeps it so smooth. White skin wrinkles in the sun, whereas African skin is smooth even when bombarded with UV rays. It's horses for courses isn't it? My husband can stay out in the boiling sun in Ivory Coast with no shelter or hat, and never ever burn. I stand for five minutes waiting for a Taxi and I'm red as a lobster and probably heading for skin cancer! |
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05 Feb 12 - 06:08 PM (#3302758) Subject: RE: BS: Black Hair HELP! From: katlaughing Jeri, thanks for the WEN link. I am always looking for hair products without sodium lauryl(sp?) sulfate - makes me it like crazy. I, also, meant to mention the wide-toothed combs. It's the only way I can comb out my hair. I had a dermatologist tell me once that people wipe away all of their natural moisturising body oils when they towel off after a bath or shower. He said if we couldn't "drip-dry" to at least only pat dry. I've also had docs tell me not to use any soap on sensitive skin. It has helped. Out here where it is so dry, though, I still have to slather on lotion after a shower. I spray on Na-PCA with aloe vera before the lotion. Michelle, I tried my daughter, but had to leave a message. Eliza, I burn easily, too. When I was much younger, one thing I was really surprised by was a very good and dear friend of mine, who was a descendant of early Americans of Mexican descent, burned very easily. I don't know if there was a mix of some sort in his lineage, but he also had freckles and green eyes, though was quite dark otherwise. We used to joke about being brother and sister because of the freckles and eyes! |
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05 Feb 12 - 09:27 PM (#3302826) Subject: RE: BS: Black Hair HELP! From: wysiwyg Suggest you check with Pat Dean to contact daughter Marci regarding Marci's daughter's hair. ~S~ |
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06 Feb 12 - 05:01 PM (#3303274) Subject: RE: BS: Black Hair HELP! From: VirginiaTam What JiK said about starting from the tip and working upwards when combing/brushing is true. I had and my kids had very thick very kinky hair. I used to hide when Mom pulled out the hair brush. Hope you find products and methods that are reasonable for you both. When he is a bit older and his hair longer you may want to look at cornrowing as a management method. Though I am told that it can cause headache in some people. |