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27 Feb 12 - 11:41 PM (#3314344) Subject: BS: Chongo praised for ancestors' good taste From: Little Hawk This just in: Tribal African spokesmen from near Chongo's birthplace on an obscure American trading compound in Nigeria have put in a good word for his USA presidential bid, drawing attention to the fact that his ancestors had "very good taste". "Those chimpanzees among Chongo's ancestors were well known to my people," said Donald Umbawasee of Nigeria. "I can still recall my Granddaddy saying what good taste they had." With international support like this, Chongo can look forward to a vigorous campaign and a no doubt glorious 8 years in office. |
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28 Feb 12 - 02:18 AM (#3314377) Subject: RE: BS: Chongo praised for ancestors' good taste From: JohnInKansas So he intends to revive the old campaign slogan: "A #### in every pot." ? I'm not sure "having a monkey" for dinner sounds like much of a party plan(k). John |
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28 Feb 12 - 08:59 AM (#3314514) Subject: RE: BS: Chongo praised for ancestors' good taste From: Amos This is like blaming your hair falling out on your grandchildren. It is the kind of illogical rhetoric which we have come to think of as typical self-serving political speak. Buffalo have a much more refined taste, for example. Besides, Chongo's ancestors were Moron chimps, known for their bilious tissues. A |
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28 Feb 12 - 09:12 AM (#3314517) Subject: RE: BS: Chongo praised for ancestors' good taste From: Little Hawk A number of other Africans have come forward, stating that Chongo's ancestors had excellent taste. "We often had them for dinner," said Albert Anawetazi of Lagos. "I can still remember what fine taste they had. I would be happy to have more of his relatives here for dinner at any time." |
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28 Feb 12 - 09:13 AM (#3314518) Subject: RE: BS: Chongo praised for ancestors' good taste From: olddude Chongo would taste fine with BBQ sauce over an open fire |
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28 Feb 12 - 09:24 AM (#3314524) Subject: RE: BS: Chongo praised for ancestors' good taste From: David C. Carter So you want to turn him into Joan of Arc! |
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28 Feb 12 - 09:32 AM (#3314526) Subject: RE: BS: Chongo praised for ancestors' good taste From: Little Hawk This just in: Chongo totally lost his temper at a press conference this morning and launched a furious tirade against Nigerians. He swore that his first act as president will be to send in the Sixth Fleet and bomb Nigeria "back into the stone age"! Pundits are scrambling to make sense out of this sudden radical shift in Chongo's stance on foreign affairs and war policy. (He had previously vowed to end all foreign wars, close overseas bases, and bring the troops home.) **** In a separate announcement, the Republican Party has issued a statement praising Chongo for his latest foreign policy statement. Word on the street is that the Republicans are now considering "viable strategies" for wooing Chongo away from the APP ticket and getting him to run for the Republicans instead! "He is a man...ummm...an animal we feel we can trust to represent the true interests of America and not back down from dire foreign threats to our liberty and our way of life," said an anonymous Republican spokesman. "Unlike Romney, he takes a definite stand. Unlike Santorum, he's not afraid to bite the hand that feeds him. He wants to send in the Marines and the Navy and kick some ass. How can we possibly go wrong with this guy? I say it's Chongo all the way in 2012!" |
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28 Feb 12 - 09:48 AM (#3314533) Subject: RE: BS: Chongo praised for ancestors' good taste From: Rapparee AND he's got definite opinions on female reproduction. It's called "bush meat." Odd coincidence, that. |
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28 Feb 12 - 10:01 AM (#3314547) Subject: RE: BS: Chongo praised for ancestors' good taste From: olddude Rap do you mean he was a supporter of George Bush? |
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28 Feb 12 - 12:30 PM (#3314633) Subject: RE: BS: Chongo praised for ancestors' good taste From: Bee-dubya-ell To blatantly steal from the old Starkist tuna TV advertisements featuring Charlie the Tuna, "Albert Anawetazi doesn't want chimps with good taste, he wants chimps that taste good." |
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28 Feb 12 - 03:33 PM (#3314735) Subject: RE: BS: Chongo praised for ancestors' good taste From: Little Hawk If Chongo has his way, Albert Anawetazi will end up "eating" a cruise missile... |
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29 Feb 12 - 05:46 AM (#3314977) Subject: RE: BS: Chongo praised for ancestors' good taste From: David C. Carter I didn't know that Chongo had any incesters,let alone "good tast". I thought he was a "one off"! Oh dear. |
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29 Feb 12 - 06:35 AM (#3314995) Subject: RE: BS: Chongo praised for ancestors' good taste From: Ed T He was born in a wagon of a travlin show |
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29 Feb 12 - 09:06 AM (#3315057) Subject: RE: BS: Chongo praised for ancestors' good taste From: Rapparee Chinglow is a reverse mutant: all of any powers he had were taken from him. |
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29 Feb 12 - 11:08 AM (#3315110) Subject: RE: BS: Chongo praised for ancestors' good taste From: Little Hawk You, sir, are sliding down the slippery slope to...something...but I am not quite sure what it is. |
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29 Feb 12 - 01:33 PM (#3315178) Subject: RE: BS: Chongo praised for ancestors' good taste From: Rapparee Well, it's not my fault that Chingo is what he is. |
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01 Mar 12 - 04:24 AM (#3315455) Subject: RE: BS: Chongo praised for ancestors' good taste From: David C. Carter Word on the street is that he had a face shift. |
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01 Mar 12 - 10:12 AM (#3315587) Subject: RE: BS: Chongo praised for ancestors' good taste From: Rapparee He also had a tummy stuck. |